We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.
While the Sun welcomes The Others with a Polish version of its paper, the Express has yet to equip its organ with this weeks lucky pin number, a guide to pick-pocketing and whatever else the marketing department assures us gypsies are fans of.
Right now opportunities are being missed. The Express bring news that “FAMILIES MUST SELL LAND FOR GYPSY CAMPSITES”.
The “land grab” is taking place on campsites, fields and – best of all – private gardens.
THE SUN (front page): “SOCIAL WORKERS NEW SHAME”
When a tortured and murdered baby isn’t shaming enough…
“BABY P GRAN: I WARNED HARINGEY”
Says she: “They didn’t want to know.”
The last photo of blond, blue-eyed Baby P — taken days before he was found dead in his blood-spattered cot
On page 5, the Sun produces a petition. It’s already been written: “All blonde children with blue-eyes should be saved first and…” Or:
“I believe that ALL the social workers involved in the case of baby P, including Sharon Shoesmith, Maria Ward, Sylvia Henry and Gillie Christou should be sacked and never allowed to work with vulnerable children again”.
Meanwhile, Baby P’s mother is free to have more children, and so too his step-dad and lodger Jason Owen. Discuss…
“…I also demand that the doctor involved with Baby P, Sabah Al Zayyat, should lose her job and not be allowed to treat the public again.”
Says the grandmother: “I blame myself.” Can she be banned from being a grandma?
But one local has produced her own petition. Stephanie Biber has plastered a poster to the windows of the Hornsey and Wood Green Labour Party headquarters. The legend runs:
“Sharon Shoesmith you have blood on your hands. Council tax payers of Haringey refuse to pay council tax until Sharon Shoesmith is sacked.”
Says Ed Balls, the swivel-eyed Education Secretary:
“People are asking how these despicable acts of evil can happen in this day and age and in Haringey of all places.”
Yeah, the bucolic splendour of one of the most impoverished, dirty, depressing places in the entire country. If there, then anywhere…
TREVOR KAVANAGH: “Leftie Mafia close ranks over Baby P”
P is for Politics…
IN BURMA, they are coming for the journalists:
Burmese media say a local journalist has been sentenced to two years in prison for covering a rally by victims of a devastating cyclone.
Media sources say a court in Rangoon sentenced Ein Khaing Oo on Friday after a closed-door trial, in which she had no defense lawyer. She was convicted of taking photos that could be used by foreign news organizations to harm Burmese interests.
The reporter for Burmese magazine Eco Vision already had spent five months in prison. She was arrested June 10 while covering the rally of cyclone survivors outside a United Nations building in Rangoon.
The participants in the rally were appealing for aid from the U.N. Development Program after failing to get help from Burmese authorities.
And the best headline of the day is on Matt Drudge’s wall:
600 mobile homes burned…
Get this: you live in a fire zone.
You live in a fire zone in a home that you can move. You see the fire coming.
And you stay put.
Old Mr Anorak sees the wildebeats on the palins of Africa. The lions are coming. The weak stop for a drink…
JOSEF Fritzl is the subject of the greatest Daily Star line of all time:
Beneath the headline: “YOU’LL BE SCHNITZEL, FRITZL…” readers learn:
INCEST monster Josef Fritzl is fighting plans to lock him away in a psychiatric prison with a brain-eating cannibal who hates paedophiles.
Cannibals hate paedos. But is it good to hate your food? Isn’t love better? Do vegetarians hate carrots and nuts? Do fisheaters hate cod?
Twisted Robert Ackermann – who killed his flatmate and gobbled his brains – flew into a rage when he heard about Fritzl’s crimes.
Now Fritzl is convinced the German cannibal plans to turn him into Fritzl-schnitzel.
“I could murder a steak, literally, because I hate cows,” says the man in the restaurant. “Cows are pure evil”…
THE INDEPENDENT: “Detective set to publish McCann book in Britain”
Portuguese officer who led the search for Madeleine says his account defends the honour of his team
It’s Goncalo Amaral…
Speaking exclusively to The Independent on Sunday, Goncalo Amaral denied cashing in on the tragic disappearance of the three-year-old but said he was determined to restore his reputation, which “had been torn to shreds” by unfair and inaccurate media reports.
Not cashing in by writing a book that is then placed on sale for a fee. Why not just publish his thought on a website, and distribute it for free?
The book, Maddie: The Truth about the Lie, has already sold an estimated 180,000 copies in Europe, and Mr Amaral’s representatives are trying find a British publisher.
Anyone brave enough to publish it?
HURRAH for the man who may yet be King Charles…
BABY P Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Baby P in the news…
A child is killed. The child is blonde. The papers have their new cause to shock and sicken…
CAROLE MALONE (Sunday Mirror): “Baby P: They’re ALL guilty”
They. Guilty. Of what crime?
I HAD to force myself to read it. And every sickening, gut-wrenching detail made me want to hunt down the monsters who’d hurt Baby P—or allowed him to be hurt—and hurt THEM.
There’s a Facebook club you can join, Carole…
Never in all my years in this job have I read an account of child cruelty like this one.
Never. Not Jamie Bulger; not Bradely & Hindley; not the case files of paediatricians specialising in child protection?
The Wave Trust charity recently produced a grim list of the most disturbing cases that have followed over the intervening 35 years. Jasmine Lorrington, battered to death at the age of four in 1984; 20-month-old Martin Nicoll, who died of 68 injuries in 1991; Lauren Wright, 6, starved and beaten to death in 2000; two-year-old Ainlee Labonte, ditto, in January 2002; and 21 month old John Gray, who died as a result of 200 injuries, including a ruptured liver, in 2003.
Is Carole looking for a researcher?
I kept seeing them punching him, smacking his head, knocking his teeth down his throat. I kept thinking at what point did his spine snap? How agonising was it? How often did they hurt him? Did this little mite ever feel one moment’s love or happiness?
In my mind’s eye I saw them making him beg like a dog, spinning him round in that chair till he fell off. I imagined his eyes wide with terror, thinking: “No, please, not again.”
Enough! Make it stop…. Maaaaaake it stop, please….
SPEAKING from Bangkok, where he is taking the ladies’ ping-pong team through their winter training camp, Old Mr Anorak welcomes you to the new Anorak – which will arrive sometime today.
Answering the brief to give OMA’s estranged great-nephew Rupert ‘Are we there yet?’ Murdoch a bloody good thrashing, Anorak will shine a light on the world’s media and study the words of the great and good.
All this for a full 20p less than the Daily Star, 30p less then the Sun, 50p less then the Mail and 40p less than the Express.
Yours in anticipation,
Image: Old Mr Anorak at the launch…
TERROR. Fact. Fiction. Well, yes…
Bloggers have been. Bloggers set up a site called MPD Enforcer. How very dare they? If anyone is to police the police it should be the police. We can’t just have anyone telling the police what kind of a job they are doing.
Who then can check their work? The police? They would be the best equipped. It’s pretty clear you should require a licence of some kind to police the police. The police could provide the licence and do background checks on any applicants.
First the Memphis police should locate the bloggers. They produce a law suit. The police maintain that the bloggers’ site features a picture of an undercover officer. For anyone who missed it, a picture of the same officer features on the, er, police department web site.
“Fantasy world awash with sex and porn” – Tom Rawstone wonders why a fantasy world lie Second Life is awash with sex and porn and not, say, liver and onions or talcum powder and dole queues..?
“Jobs mayhem and the Great Debt Lie – Mr Brown insists what we can spend our way out of recession because our national debt’s lower than Germany’s. In fact, the official figures are only the tip of a terrifying iceberg of debt that amounts to £1,500 for every family”
“Angina test ‘worthless’” – That all clear… you might be all clear…
More scare stories next week…
“STEVE Zacharanda, also known as Adam Smith”, of the Birmingham Mail, is following Obama.
It’s Gotcha journalism as Steve is “cutting and pasting from the BBC”.
“I’m a bit of an idiot, basically,” says Zacharanda.
“It’s been brilliant. I’ve met so many women … Actually I’ve just come up with some award winning prose. If I can just keep my battery …”
British journalists – best in the business…
“One of the reasons I came into politics was because I thought I lacked the skills to be a social worker” – Margaret Beckett and Baby P…
Baby P was first introduced to us in the form of a virtual reality 4-D model. The wounds were smears of red and purple.
Jurors saw the wounds. Then readers saw the wounds. Then Baby P was shown with his face blurred out. But this was not enough.
Now Baby P is on the cover of the Times. You can see his face. You can see his face on the cover of the Daily Star, the Daily Mirror, The Guardian, The Sun and The Independent.
The Mail goes one better. It has “TWO FACES OF BABY P” on its cover.
To the left, readers see the same blond child as on the other papers.
“He reaches out towards an unseen figure behind the camera, and the start of a smile lifts his chubby cheeks, exposing his first baby teeth.” Note his “bright blue eyes and white-blond hair”.
To the right, the image shows Baby P’s faced “smeared with chocolate to cover the wounds that would kill him”.
Deborah Orr has already seen enough:
As a person with conventional views about how to bring up children, I’d consider a mother who had no shame in presenting her small child to authorities covered in chocolate (as the mother of Baby P did, to hide his wounds) to be neglectful enough. I don’t hold with giving chocolate to babies. I don’t hold with carting them about with food or anything else smeared all over their faces.
But we want to see more of “his beautiful blue eyes and angelic face” that “would melt the hearts of most who met him”.
We want the adrenaline rush of horror. Sky shows its readers “Baby P Death Videos”.
Go, on take a look, if you dare to. You need to know what’s going on.
A reader in Portugal writes to Anorak of the Madeleine McCann case. There are no suspects. We do not know what crime, if any, has been committed. The parents are innocent. Robert Murat is innocent.
Now read on…
“Maddie: private detectives received aid from a “mole” inside the PJ – SOS Maddie.”
Spanish private detective reveals how the McCanns gained access to confidential police information within the Maddie case
Can this be true? Duarte Levy writes:
According to one of the private detectives that were hired by Metodo 3 within their contract with Kate and Gerry McCann, an inspector from the Polícia Judiciária transmitted confidential information regarding the movements of the Portuguese investigators and of their British colleagues within the inquiry into Maddie’s disappearance to the Spanish agency.
So leaks from the Portuguese police might not have been all bad?
The information that was thus obtained has allowed for the private detectives to inform the McCann couple and their entourage about the diligences that were prepared by the Portuguese investigators:
“Several initiatives by Amaral’s men failed due to the information that was given away by their colleague… but there was also information coming from informants that were connected to the British embassy”, the detective states.
“That was information that allowed us to know in advance what inspector Amaral and his colleagues intended to do”, the private detective further states during an interview that was recently recorded in Spain, stressing that “the inquiry would probably have had a different outcome without the intervention of the private detectives, but equally without that of certain British professionals.”
So says the Wall Street Journal’s Peter Kafka.
Kafka says that Portfolio media blogger Jeff Bercovici had to pull down a story obtained under Chatham House rules.
Some MediaMemo readers have asked me to reprint all of Bercovici’s story, but I don’t have access to it.
But type “cache:” before the dead url, and you get:
Katie’s Little Helpers: How Couric Prepped for Palin
At Quadrangle’s Foursquare conference today, Portfolio’s own Matt Cooper interviewed Katie Couric, Brian Williams and George Stephanopoulos about covering the presidential campaign that was. Matt says he’s sworn to secrecy, and you know I wasn’t invited, but one person who was there says it was a lively discussion, with Williams teasing Couric about all the attention she got for her campaign-narrative-altering interviews of Sarah Palin.
YOUR Highness… Read on
THE death of blogging, says the Economist’s blogger:
“Performance is not a word I can use at the moment. But, hopefully, results will do and the performance will follow” – David Moyes, Everton FC manager
LABOUR aims to undemine George Osborne:
Tories face tough choices – and moving George Osborne is one of them – Iain Martin
Sadly, George Osborne should go – Janet Daley
Why we need Ken Clarke to take on Alistair Darling – Tracy Corrigan
David Cameron should replace George Osborne with Ken Clarke – Alex Singleton
But how do you unseat a man who has done so very little..?
SHANNON Matthews: Anorak’s at-a-glance guide to press coverage of Shannon Matthews and Karen Matthews
To Leeds Crown Court…
DAILY MIRROR (front page): “POLICE TO SHANNON’S MUM – SHE’S SAFE AND WELL. SHANNON MUM TO POLICE: I LIKE YOUR RINGTONE”
Indeed, the police have ringtones. One has a whistle that makes the sound of a duck, another has a truncheon shaped like drumstick by which he can pound the beat, literally!
Says one officer:
“I thought, ‘We’ve just found your daughter and you’re more concerned about the ringtone’”
Says another officer:
Ring ding ding ding ding
A Ring Ding Ding Dingdemgdemg
A ring ding ding ding ding
a Bram ba am baba weeeeeee
Page 4 and 5: “SHE SAID SHE’D LIKE SEX WITH COP CUTE BUM”
Natalie Brown is in the witness box. Says she:
“One woman said about him having a cute bum. Karen said she wouldn’t mind taking him upstairs. She was having a giggle thinking it was funny. Acting like a little child.”
Maybe the wrong child went missing?
“One minute she would be laughing and be happy and joking but when the news came on TV she would be very quiet.”
We’re on the telly!
Natalie claimed she told Matthews off on one occasion when she said to her youngest daughter “Look Shannon’s on TV she’s famous.”
Is Karen Matthews a celebrity? Is Shannon? How much is her story worth?
THE SUN (front page): “Shannon mother’s ‘silence’ at rescue”
Says neighbour Natalie Brown:
“I never saw any real tears. Her eyes would well up and that was it.”
Pages 8 and 9: “THE RING OF TRUTH – Phone quip as Shannon found”
DC Alex Gummit has a phone that when called plays Crazy by Gnarls Barkley. Says Karen Matthews, allegedly: “You must Bluetooth it to me or text me.” Or call and we’ll do cans…
The Sun goes on to talk about the £50,000 reward for finding Shannon. The piece is erroneously called “SUN’S £50,000.” The reward was indeed for that sum but the Sun did not put it all up. The money was raised by well wishers. For such reasons, readers who find Madeleine McCann should beware of claiming Anorak’s £3.2million, as advertised here.
Matthews, 33 — who is jointly accused of staging the nine-year-old’s disappearance to claim a £50,000 reward from The Sun — left officers deeply suspicious because of her reaction.
How is it unwanted? We know not, only that it is.
SPANISH snouts in troughs:
The new Room of Human Rights and the Alliance of Civilisations, a spectacular cave dripping with multicoloured stalactites and described as the Sistine Chapel of the 21st century, was created by the artist Miquel Barcelo and is to be inaugurated on Tuesday by Spain’s King and Queen.
But the early plaudits for this vast space swiftly became cries of outrage as news emerged that the Spanish government was contributing €8m (£5.3m) from the public purse, including €500,000 lifted from the aid budget for developing countries.
The Foreign Minister, Miguel Angel Moratinos, declined to specify the final cost. “Only fools confuse value and price. This project is a new way of doing diplomacy and foreign policy,” he said…
ANORAK has spent 18 months pointing out that paedophile abduction is a vanishingly rare occurrence; the belief that paedophile abductors are everywhere is a monstrous delusion which sells a lot of newspapers, and enables politicians to propose restrictions on everyone’s civil rights under the guise of protecting children. A bit like the War on Terror…