Anorak

News | Anorak - Part 478

News Category

We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.

Madeleine McCann Gives Lives Meaning And Worth

MADDIE WATCH – Anorak’s at-a-glance guide to press coverage of Madeleine McCann, Kate McCann and Gerry McCann

INTERNATIONAL HERLAD TRIUBIUNE (France): “Billionaire retailer Green shops for a bargain”

Mark Pootter says Philip Green is on the hunt for a knock-down-once-in-a-lifetime- I’m-cuttin’-me-own-throat-guv’nor-honest-to-goodness bargain.

And who is Philip Green? Why…:

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 13th, October 2008 | In: Broadsheets, Madeleine McCann, News | Comments (253) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Obama: Coming Up For Ayers

JOHN Dickerson on Obama and his terrorist friend Ayres:

Voters are cynical. Obama doesn’t want them to be, implores them not to be at almost every campaign stop, yet in this episode he benefits from their cynicism. If [he] weathers the Ayers controversy, it will be in part because voters judge his association with Ayers, and his weak answers about that association, to be nothing more than a politician’s garden-variety duplicity… 

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Red State For Obama

SAYS a founder of Red State:

 

In the end, I couldn’t do it. My California ballot arrived in the mail today, and I opened it fully intending to vote for John McCain. I filled out the state propositions first…  then the local offices… Finally, the vote for President of the United States: an academic exercise in California, where Barack Obama will surely win by a crushing margin. But good citizenship demands voting as if it matters. Do I believe in John McCain? Not as much as I used to. Do I believe in Sarah Palin? Despite my early enthusiasm for her, now not at all. Do I believe in the national Republican Party? Not in the slightest.

Obama cannot be stopped…

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The World According To Daily Mail Readers

A DAILY Mail reader explains the cutent economic downturn:

Britain has been wecked by the Marxist persons within government and local Councils INCLUDING the NHS. Marxist want to rule every moment of the citizenrys life,craddle to grave. That way the Marxist will always be in power and have a “brainwashed” society. This to my mind is proven by the “unhealthy” interest in Soccer, loosely akin to the ancient antics of ROME.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News, Tabloids | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Anorak Is Your Official National Coming Out Day Organ

IN the USA, yeaterday was, as you know, National Coming Out Day. Old Mr Anorak applauds the day and wants everyone come out and smell the pansies…

Picture: Old Mr Anorak, Shandy garden dinner and dance 1978…

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (12) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Haider Passes On The Left, And Dies

HAIDER is dead. Anorak reader Baby Jane writes from Austria:

“The sun fell from the sky.”
“The clocks stood still.”
“The sun went down on Carinthia.”

Those were the words of Jörg Haider’s BZÖ-colleagues, yesterday morning, after his death was announced…

Afterwards I drove through the city where I live, saw people walking, talking … an ordinary Saturday morning … but something was different, and I could actually feel it, see it:

A big, dark, heavy cloud has finally been lifted.

An odious man is dead. But he always reminded Anorak more of Austria’s answer to Billy Holliday than a real politico. Those collars. He was an Austrian celeb in land free to them…

Joerg Haider: I Blame The Jews, Muslims And Blacks

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Man Arrested For Helping Old Woman With Train Fare

TO the brave new world of Virgin trains:

Stand-up Tom Wrigglesworth was threatened with arrest – after coming to the aid of an elderly train passenger who had been reduced to tears by Virgin Train staff.
The comic stepped in after he saw 75-year-old Lena Ainscow sobbing after she was forced to pay £115 for getting on the wrong train.

He organised a whip-round among fellow passengers to cover the fare, but the officious train manager said his actions amounted to begging – and called police. He ordered 32-year-old Wrigglesworth to hand back the cash or face being arrested.

The incident occurred yesterday as Mrs Ainscow was travelling from her home in Bolton, Greater Manchester, to see family in Bromley, Kent, including her son-in-law, who had just returned from a tour of duty in Iraq with the Royal Artillery.

She had paid £11.50 to travel on the 10.45am Manchester to Euston service. But her travel itinerary, issued by Virgin, said she had been booked on the 10.15am train. When she queried the discrepancy with Virgin staff in Manchester, they told her to board the earlier service.

However, that held no sway with the train manager who forced her to pay for a new ticket for being on the wrong service.

Wrigglesworth told Chortle: ‘I was trying to sleep when I heard the train manager insisting this old dear pay the fare, so I tried to intervene, because it was obviously just a mistake.

‘She said, “It’s all right, love” and produced loads of notes from her handbag to pay the fare. But it was only pride that she said that, and I saw she was crying. It turned out she was carrying all that cash because she’d saved up her pension money to buy her grandkids presents.’

‘I thought I had to do something, so I got a paper bag from the buffet car and started a collection.

‘I wasn’t sure that I wanted to get involved, but I had this weird sense that I had to, because of what I do for a living. If anyone was going to be able to stand up in front of a carriage full of people and ask for money, it should be me. I thought that I just said the words of anger that were ringing in my head, the worst thing that can happen is that I die as if it was a bad gig.’

‘So I went through about six carriages, making a little speech that if we all chucked a quid we would get the money in no time. Everyone was happy to help and someone even put in £30.

‘But there was this drunk bloke in one carriage – and this was about 11.30am – who accused me of begging. He started heckling me. I thought, “You don’t know who you’re dealing with.” I turned it into a gig and put him down. People were happy to pay the £1 for that entertainment. At some carriages I got a round of applause.’

‘The manager, who was the Nazi jobsworth personified, accused me of begging and asked me to give everyone’s money back. I started to get quite cocky. He said I should have asked his permission first – but I told him I hadn’t done this sort of thing before, so I wasn’t aware of the procedure.

‘He lost his temper and said he was going to get me arrested if I didn’t give people their money back. I told him people didn’t want it back.’

Virgin – we’re getting there… slowly…

Alistair Darling To Make Banks Run Like Trains

Eunuchs On Trains: Aboard The 7:15 To New Delhi

South West Trains Discover A Way To Make Passengers Feel Worse

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (16) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Stalking Barry George’s Bottom

BARRY George has been cleared of killing Jill Dando. But the News of the World is keeping tabs on the man, stalking him, even.

In “Barry George in sex-pest clash on woman’s doorstep”, readers look on and see George asking a woman out; having his advances rejected; dodging a headbutt from the aforesaid woman’s son.

And just last week we revealed how he tried to get into a TV studio to see Sky News presenter Kay Burley, 46— who was then offered extra security.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News, Tabloids | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Madeleine McCann: Investigators Wanted, Benchmarks Of Pain And McFly

MADDIE WATCH – Anorak’s at-a-glance guide to press coverage of Madeleine McCann, Kate McCann and Gerry McCann

DAILY MAIL: “£50,000 monthly expenses bill for McCann’s private eyes”

A scoop. It’s months old. But it’s still a scoop, right? Metodo 3 are on the job…

The private investigators hired to find Madeleine McCann were embroiled in fresh controversy last night as it was revealed they claimed nearly £50,000 in expenses for one month’s work.

… expensive

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: Madeleine McCann, News, Tabloids | Comments (92) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Britt Lapthorne Let Down By MSM

BRITT Lapthorne’s family, mum Elke, father Dale and brother Darren have requested privacy after the confirmation the body found in the sea off Dubrovnik, Croatia, is the missing 21-year-old backpacking holiday maker.

Picture…ABC

Britt disappeared after visiting the Fuego nightclub in the old quarter of the city during the evening of September 18. Police are still investigating.

“She was at the wrong place at the wrong time,” a distraught Elke Lapthorne told reporters.

Three things must be mentioned.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (10) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Mara Carfagna Sues Over Blow Job Gag

IN Italy, Sabina Guzzanti (comic) is being sued by Mara Carfagna (former model and TV showgirl) “after joking that Carfagna, 32, got her job as minister by indulging in an explicit sexual act with Berlusconi”.

Rumour has been rife in the Italian press about Carfagna’s relationship with Berlusconi after the prime minister quipped in 2007: “If I was not already married I would have married her immediately.”

Peter Mandelson denies an affair. Carfagna is the Italian equal opportunities minister…

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Joerg Haider: I Blame The Jews, Muslims And Blacks

JOERG Haider is dead.

I don’t want to gloat over it (far better if he had been defeated politically), but the far-right, anti-immigrant Austrian politician Joerg Haider has been killed in a car accident.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 11th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (10) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Faking The Grade: Gawker And Kos Stung In Sarah Palin Lie

SARAH Palin is a white women with a nice line lipstick. So she must be thick. But she isn’t. Dawn Eden spots the fake:

Gawker—the same online rag that called me a “Crazed Christ-Loving Re-Virgin”—is engaging in some craziness of its own: It’s asking readers to judge the validity of what it says may be ‘Sarah Palin’s High-School Grades’—but is in fact a forgery made from my SAT scoresheet, which I posted in January 2004.

 

 

 

Posted: 11th, October 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Madonna Is The Products Of Others

MADONNA, the tyrant:

“Madonna is a demanding diva even to her peers. The Swedish pop star Robyn was psyched when the Material Mom invited her to open for a handful of her European concerts but quickly found out there are rules. Robyn told her hometown Swedish paper that she and her crew were told “not to approach Madonna, not to speak to Madonna and, above all, no pictures…I hadn’t expected any glamour, but it’s strange that they assume that the first thing you’re gonna do is run after Madonna and ask for an autograph. My worst nightmare would be to turn into Madonna…Madonna is constantly chasing the latest trends.”

Madonna says Sarah Plain is a nutter… Indeed.

Via

Fascist Émigré Madonna Threatens Sarah Palin

Sarah Palin Escapes Madonna

Madonna On Panic Attacks

Madonna Shows That Obama Has No Chance Against McCain’s Gang

Madonna Is A Singer, In A Room, Dreaming Of Africa

Celebrities Against Sarah Palin: Lindsay Lohan Rules

Celebrity Quote Of The Day: Oprah Winfrey On Sarah Palin

Posted: 11th, October 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Madeleine McCann And The Dawn Of Creationism

MADDIE WATCH – Anorak’s at-a-glance guide to press coverage of Madeleine McCann, Kate McCann and Gerry McCann

In the beginning was the word. And the word was “Maddie”…

THE INDEPENDENT: “Religion vs science: can the divide between God and rationality be reconciled?”

And on the eighth day the media was created and Our Maddie did come to the fore…

‘A clergyman in charge of education for the country’s leading scientific organisation – it’s a Monty Python sketch,” pronounced Britain’s top atheist, Richard Dawkins, recently. The problem was that Reiss, as well as being an evolutionary biologist and population geneticist, is a non-stipendiary priest in the Church of England.

Still dunno.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 11th, October 2008 | In: Broadsheets, Madeleine McCann, News | Comments (55) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Iceland Is For Sale

ICELAND is for sale:

There’s a very slight chance that this is fake. Very slight.

Via

Whirlpool Economics Won’t Wash

Kent County Council And Haringey Borough Hit By Iceland

Terrorism Saves British From Iceland Banks

Posted: 10th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (11) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Jordan Sex’s Up Horse Of The Year Show

JORDAN is at the Horse of The Year Show. She’s performing to Color Me Badd’s “I Wanna Sex U Up.

Beats riding Pete…

Via

Posted: 10th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Shut Up And Read Your Bible

Stuart Bell on Churchill’s Bible studies:

Sir Patrick Cormack (South Staffordshire) (Con): If these particular splendid words are to endure for ever, would it not be a very good idea to ensure that every child attending a Church of England school was given a copy, not of a green Bible, but of the King James Bible, to commemorate the anniversary?

Sir Stuart Bell: That is an interesting suggestion. May I divert the House briefly, Mr. Speaker? Mr. Randolph Churchill’s mouth could never be kept closed, so, during the war, to keep him quiet for a while, he was bet a couple of crates of brandy that he could not read the authorised version of the Bible from cover to cover.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 10th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Obama’s Great Schlep Forward

JEWS for Obama. Obams for Jews. Jews and Obama for Obama Jews. And so on…

Got Bubbies living in Florida? (That’s a Yiddish term for grandmothers.) Or any other crucial swing state for that matter?

If so, you are qualified for this particular voyage – an organised effort to visit your Jewish grandparents and persuade them to vote for Barack Obama.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 10th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


No Sex And Live Longer

CLARA Meadmore is 105. She looks not a day over 104. The secret of her youth and longevity: no sex.

Says he:

“I’ve always had lots of platonic friendships with men but never felt the need to go further than that or marry.”

Did no-one tell her you don’t need to be married to do it? Does she watch Jeremy Kyle?

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 10th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Police Log: Facing The Rap With Classic Jon Gaunt

ANDREW Vactor is facing a $150 fine for playing rap music too loudly on his car stereo.

Champaign County Municipal Court Judge Susan Fornof-Lippencott offers to reduce the fine to $35 if Vactor spends 20 hours listening to classical music.

Vactor agrees. He lasts15 minutes.

Over in the Sun, Jon Gaunty Gaunt ogles “forces favourite” Katherine Jenkins:

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 10th, October 2008 | In: News, Tabloids | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


British Town Halls Lose Millions In Iceland Bank collapse

THE economic crisis is hitting people everywhere.British local governments decided to place their money and faith in Icelandic banks.Rates of interest proving too tempting for over 100 town halls who thought it looked a sure winner.They were wrong.

Their millions(reports say around a BILLION pounds) has been LOST in this crisis.

Questions:

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 10th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


How To Lose Half A Trillion In A Fortnight

TWO weeks ago, budget analysts said the Bailout measures might push the US deficit to as much as $1.5 trillion.

Today David Greenlaw, Morgan Stanley’s chief economist,estimated that the 2009 budget deficit could be close to $2 trillion, or 12.5 percent of gross domestic product, more than twice the record of 6 percent set in 1983.

That’s half a trillion dollars in a fortnight; wonder what the numbers will look like in another fortnight’s time?

Chenier

No Space Left On The National Debt CLock

Posted: 10th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


105% Of People In Indianapolis Registrater To Vote

THIS is impressive. Ogden on Politics:

According to STATSIndiana, In 2007, Indianapolis/Marion County had an estimated population of 876,804. Of that number 232,607 were below 18 years of age, for a total of 644,197 people in Marion County/Indianapolis 18 or over and thus eligible to vote. (Indiana allows felons to vote as long as they are not incarcerated).

So we have 644,197 people eligible to be registered in Marion County/Indianapolis, and 677,401 people registered. Congratulations go to Indianapolis for having 105% of its residents registered!

Stuff of dreams…

Ron Paul Unites 100 Per Cent Of The Electorate

America Is Saddam Hussein’s New Iraq

Via

Posted: 9th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Banksy Dips His Pet Shop Nuggets

Banksy1

BANKSY’S Mock Pet Supply Shop:

Street artist/prankster Banksy has unveiled his latest installation — a mock pet supply store on seventh avenue near Bleecker Street in New York’s West Village.

In its windows, chicken nuggets dip themselves into sauce and a white rabbit wearing a pearl necklace files its nails in a mirror. There are also fishsticks swimming in a bowl (that look suspiciously like something else, I might add).

Stick to walls…

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 9th, October 2008 | In: News | Comments (11) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0