News | Anorak - Part 480

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We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.

International Libel Laws For Bloggers

LIBEL laws: “Martin Stabe points to another legal story that is getting too little coverage here, with links to a news story and a FindLaw analysis about a New York court refusing to protect an American author from a UK “libel tourism” judgment over a book that sold a mere 23 copies in England.

“What’s profoundly frightening about this is that we in America could find ourselves subject to the UK’s libel and privacy laws, which throw free speech to the wolves in defense of privacy.”

Posted: 28th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

When Fondue attacks

AS reported: “Three people were taken to hospital with serious burns after a gas-powered fondue set exploded.

“The emergency services were called to Shedfield, Southampton, after reports that hot oil had exploded, injuring six people on Thursday evening.

“A 15-year-old girl and a man and woman in their early 40s suffered “very serious injuries” on their hands, faces and arms.

“Another three people sustained minor injuries in the incident.”

Horrible. Who the hell eats fondue?

Posted: 28th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Filthy Words By George Carlin

GEORGE Carlin’s monologue in the Supreme Court case of FCC v. Pacifica Foundation – as prepared by the Federal Communications Commission. This appears in light of the Catherine Tate article on her Christmas swearing contest:

Aruba-du, ruba-tu, ruba-tu. I was thinking about the curse words and the swear words, the cuss words and the words that you can’t say, that you’re not supposed to say all the time, ['cause] words or people into words want to hear your words. Some guys like to record your words and sell them back to you if they can, (laughter) listen in on the telephone, write down what words you say. A guy who used to be in Washington knew that his phone was tapped, used to answer, Fuck Hoover, yes, go ahead. (laughter) Okay, I was thinking one night about the words you couldn’t say on the public, ah, airwaves, um, the ones you definitely wouldn’t say, ever, [']cause I heard a lady say bitch one night on television, and it was cool like she was talking about, you know, ah, well, the bitch is the first one to notice that in the litter Johnie right (murmur) Right. And, uh, bastard you can say, and hell and damn so I have to figure out which ones you couldn’t and ever and it came down to seven but the list is open to amendment, and in fact, has been changed, uh, by now, ha, a lot of people pointed things out to me, and I noticed some myself. The original seven words were, shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits. Those are the ones that will curve your spine, grow hair on your hands and (laughter) maybe, even bring us, God help us, peace without honor (laughter) um, and a bourbon. (laughter) And now the first thing that we noticed was that word fuck was really repeated in there because the word motherfucker is a compound word and it’s another form of the word fuck. (laughter) You want to be a purist it doesn’t really — it can’t be on the list of basic words. Also, cocksucker is a compound word and neither half of that is really dirty. The word — the half sucker that’s merely suggestive (laughter) and the word cock is a half-way dirty word, 50% dirty — dirty half the time, depending on what you mean by it. (laughter) Uh, remember when you first heard it, like in 6th grade, you used to giggle. And the cock crowed three times, heh (laughter) the cock — three times. It’s in the Bible, cock in the Bible. (laughter) And the first time you heard about a cock-fight, remember — What? Huh? naw. It ain’t that, are you stupid? man. (laughter, clapping) It’s chickens, you know, (laughter) Then you have the four letter words from the old Anglo-Saxon fame. Uh, shit and fuck. The word shit, uh, is an interesting kind of word in that the middle class has never really accepted it and approved it. They use it like, crazy but it’s not really okay. It’s still a rude, dirty, old kind of gushy word. (laughter) They don’t like that, but they say it, like, they say it like, a lady now in a middle-class home, you’ll hear most of the time she says it as an expletive, you know, it’s out of her mouth before she knows. She says, Oh shit oh shit, (laughter) oh shit. If she drops something, Oh, the shit hurt the broccoli. Shit. Thank you. (footsteps fading away) (papers ruffling)

Read it! (from audience)

Shit! (laughter) I won the Grammy, man, for the comedy album. Isn’t that groovy? (clapping, whistling) (murmur) That’s true. Thank you. Thank you man. Yeah. (murmur) (continuous clapping) Thank you man. Thank you. Thank you very much, man. Thank, no, (end of continuous clapping) for that and for the Grammy, man, [']cause (laughter) that’s based on people liking it man, yeh, that’s ah, that’s okay man. (laughter) Let’s let that go, man. I got my Grammy. I can let my hair hang down now, shit. (laughter) Ha! So! Now the word shit is okay for the man. At work you can say it like crazy. Mostly figuratively, Get that shit out of here, will ya? I don’t want to see that shit anymore. I can’t cut that shit, buddy. I’ve had that shit up to here. I think you’re full of shit myself. (laughter) He don’t know shit from Shinola. (laughter) you know that? (laughter) Always wondered how the Shinola people feel about that (laughter) Hi, I’m the new man from Shinola. (laughter) Hi, how are ya? Nice to see ya. (laughter) How are ya? (laughter) Boy, I don’t know whether to shit or wind my watch. (laughter) Guess, I’ll shit on my watch. (laughter) Oh, the shit is going to hit de fan. (laughter) Built like a brick shit-house. (laughter) Up, he’s up shit’s creek. (laughter) He’s had it. (laughter) He hit me, I’m sorry. (laughter) Hot shit, holy shit, tough shit, eat shit, (laughter) shit-eating grin. Uh, whoever thought of that was ill. (murmur laughter) He had a shit-eating grin! He had a what? (laughter) Shit on a stick. (laughter) Shit in a handbag. I always like that. He ain’t worth shit in a handbag. (laughter) Shitty. He acted real shitty. (laughter) You know what I mean? (laughter) I got the money back, but a real shitty attitude. Heh, he had a shit-fit. (laughter) Wow! Shit-fit. Whew! Glad I wasn’t there. (murmur, laughter) All the animals — Bull shit, horse shit, cow shit, rat shit, bat shit. (laughter) First time I heard bat shit, I really came apart. A guy in Oklahoma, Boggs, said it, man. Aw! Bat shit. (laughter) Vera reminded me of that last night, ah (murmur). Snake shit, slicker than owl shit. (laughter) Get your shit together. Shit or get off the pot. (laughter) I got a shit-load full of them. (laughter) I got a shit-pot full, all right. Shit-head, shit-heel, shit in your heart, shit for brains, (laughter) shit-face, heh (laughter) I always try to think how that could have originated; the first guy that said that. Somebody got drunk and fell in some shit, you know. (laughter) Hey, I’m shit-face. (laughter) Shitface, today. (laughter) Anyway, enough of that shit. (laughter) The big one, the word fuck that’s the one that hangs them up the most. [']Cause in a lot of cases that’s the very act that hangs them up the most. So, it’s natural that the word would, uh, have the same effect. It’s a great word, fuck, nice word, easy word, cute word, kind of. Easy word to say. One syllable, short u. (laughter) Fuck. (Murmur) You know, it’s easy. Starts with a nice soft sound fuh ends with a kuh. Right? (laughter) A little something for everyone. Fuck (laughter) Good word. Kind of a proud word, too. Who are you? I am FUCK. (laughter) FUCK OF THE MOUNTAIN. (laughter) Tune in again next week to FUCK OF THE MOUNTAIN. (laughter) It’s an interesting word too, [']cause it’s got a double kind of a life — personality — dual, you know, whatever the right phrase is. It leads a double life, the word fuck. First of all, it means, sometimes, most of the time, fuck. What does it mean? It means to make love. Right? We’re going to make love, yeh, we’re going to fuck, yeh, we’re going to fuck, yeh, we’re going to make love. (laughter) we’re really going to fuck, yeah, we’re going to make love. Right? And it also means the beginning of life, it’s the act that begins life, so there’s the word hanging around with words like love, and life, and yet on the other hand, it’s also a word that we really use to hurt each other with, man. It’s a heavy. It’s one that you have toward the end of the argument. (laughter) Right? (laughter) You finally can’t make out. Oh, fuck you man. I said, fuck you. (laughter, murmur) Stupid fuck. (laughter) Fuck you and everybody that looks like you. (laughter) man. It would be nice to change the movies that we already have and substitute the word fuck for the word kill, wherever we could, and some of those movie cliches would change a little bit. Madfuckers still on the loose. Stop me before I fuck again. Fuck the ump, fuck the ump, fuck the ump, fuck the ump, fuck the ump. Easy on the clutch Bill, you’ll fuck that engine again. (laughter) The other shit one was, I don’t give a shit. Like it’s worth something, you know? (laughter) I don’t give a shit. Hey, well, I don’t take no shit, (laughter) you know what I mean? You know why I don’t take no shit? (laughter) [']Cause I don’t give a shit. (laughter) If I give a shit, I would have to pack shit. (laughter) But I don’t pack no shit cause I don’t give a shit. (laughter) You wouldn’t shit me, would you? (laughter) That’s a joke when you’re a kid with a worm looking out the bird’s ass. You wouldn’t shit me, would you? (laughter) It’s an eight-year-old joke but a good one. (laughter) The additions to the list. I found three more words that had to be put on the list of words you could never say on television, and they were fart, turd and twat, those three. (laughter) Fart, we talked about, it’s harmless It’s like tits, it’s a cutie word, no problem. Turd, you can’t say but who wants to, you know? (laughter) The subject never comes up on the panel so I’m not worried about that one. Now the word twat is an interesting word. Twat! Yeh, right in the twat. (laughter) Twat is an interesting word because it’s the only one I know of, the only slang word applying to the, a part of the sexual anatomy that doesn’t have another meaning to it. Like, ah, snatch, box and pussy all have other meanings, man. Even in a Walt Disney movie, you can say, We’re going to snatch that pussy and put him in a box and bring him on the airplane. (murmur, laughter) Everybody loves it. The twat stands alone, man, as it should. And two-way words. Ah, ass is okay providing you’re riding into town on a religious feast day. (laughter) You can’t say, up your ass. (laughter) You can say, stuff it! (murmur) There are certain things you can say its weird but you can just come so close. Before I cut, I, uh, want to, ah, thank you for listening to my words, man, fellow, uh space travelers. Thank you man for tonight and thank you also. (clapping whistling)

Posted: 28th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

David Beckham Comes Down To Earth

DAVID Beckham has “the biggest carbon footprint in the world”.

More importantly, as the Star reports: “During a four-month period over the summer, he was reported to have spent at least eight full days in the air”.

Only eight. How the star has come down to Earth…

Posted: 28th, December 2007 | In: Celebrities, Global Warming, Posh and Becks | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The Death Of Benazir Bhutto

bhutto coffin The Death Of Benazir Bhutto BENAZIR Bhutto is murdered. Gordon Brown has spoken.

And the papers are uncertain what to show their readers. Do they broadcast the moment of her death, or not? Is it disrespectful to show the killed leader’s dead body? And can other dead bodies be shown, if not hers?

The Express leads with “the moment Bhutto was assassinated”. The picture is of shadows bled into an orange fire. Bhutto cannot be seen

The Mirror shows the aftermath of the suicide bombers massacre. A man wails in grief. Behind him lies the charred remains of a body. It is not Bhutto, unless she wears diamond patterned black socks. The face is obscured

The Sun’s front-page picture is grimmer still. The same man is engulfed in pain. He stands. Arms outspread. Face turned to the sky. Around him are the remains of many people. Blackened. Dead. But not Bhutto

On the Daily Mail, Bhutto is “30 SECONDS FROM DEATH”

The Independent has Bhutto in a coffin. Men are carrying her. But we see no flesh. No face

The Times has Bhutto “shortly before” she was killed.

“Final moments,” says the Guardian

“Seconds from assassination,” leads the Telegraph

So no sign of the murdered Bhutto. We do not see the full horror. Perhaps we do not need to…

Posted: 28th, December 2007 | In: War On Terror | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The Unbearable Humanity

Posted: 28th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The Bhutto Family Tragedy

BENAZIR Bhutto is murdered:

Adil Nijam remarks:

At a human level this is a tragedy like no other. Only a few days ago I was mentioning to someone that the single most tragic person in all of Pakistan – maybe all the world – is Nusrat Bhutto. Benazir’s mother. Think about it. Her husband, killed. One son poisoned. Another son assasinated. One daughter dead possibly of drug overdose. Another daughter rises to be Prime Minister twice, but jailed, exiled, and finally gunned down.

Today, in shock, I can think only of Benazir Bhutto the human being. Tomorrow, maybe, I will think of politics.


Posted: 28th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Top 10 Vegetarian-Friendly Prisons

THE Top 10 Vegetarian-Friendly Prisons. As compiled by Peta:

The winners:

  1. Idaho offers a lentil shepherd’s pie, vegan pizza, vegan Mexican pie, soy patties, soy sausage, veggie loaf, veggie lasagna, veggie meatballs, vegan hot cakes, vegan biscuits, cookies, cakes, pies, and puddings.
  2. Massachusetts offers meatless chicken macaroni casserole, vegetable bologna, veggie burger, veggie meatballs, meatless chicken cutlet, meatless chicken nuggets, vegetable chop suey, vegetarian chicken stew.
  3. Pennsylvania offers tofu cacciatore, soy BBQ, tofu stir fry, veggie burger, soy Salisbury steak, soy meatballs, tofu scramble, soy croquette, soy sausage patties, soy loaf, soy pasta casserole, soy stuffed cabbage and soy stew.
  4. Georgia offers vegan BBQ, meatless deli slices, veggie patty, vegan breakfast patties, vegan chili, baked macaroni crumble, stir fried vegetables and oriental sauce, tofu scramble, vegan cornbread, vegan cookies, vegan cakes, vegan pies, vegan brownies, vegan muffins, vegan peach cobbler.
  5. New Hampshire offers chili with texturized vegetable protein, chop suey with texturized vegetable protein, shepherd’s pie with texturized vegetable protein, veggie links, lentil meatballs, grilled tofu sandwich, vegetarian pot pie, veg stir fry, hummus, veg tacos, veg chow mein, veg stew, and several veg soups.
  6. Utah offers sweet and sour tofu, tofu taco rice casserole, vegetable and tofu chow mein, veggie burgers, veggie dogs, veggie meatballs, tofu ala king, lots of tofu dishes.
  7. Hawaii offers vegetarian shepherd’s pie with texturized vegetable protein, vegetarian stuffed cabbage with texturized vegetable protein, vegetarian stew with texturized vegetable protein, grilled tofu slices, vegetarian teriyaki burger, vegetarian long rice with tofu.
  8. Tennessee offers texturized vegetable protein ala king, vegetarian sweet and sour, veggie burger, veg chili, veg stir fry, texturized vegetable protein country gravy.
  9. Kansas offers a veggie burger, taco crunch, burrito, meatless pasta, meatless chili, loaded baked potato, vegetable rice soup.
  10. North Dakota offers a veggie burger, meatless sloppy joes, veg fajitas, veg noodle stew, veg potato soup.

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Gordon Brown’s Year: Photoshopped

GORDON Brown airbrushes out his disasters.

WRITES Dizzy: Should anyone wish to have a good laugh on this utterly pointless day back in the office for the shortest working week of the year, then I strongly recommend having a look at the review of Gordon Brown’s year on Downing Street website. Pay particular attention to September, October, November and December which make no references to the nightmares he’s has faced.

There is no mention of “changes” to inheritance tax which he tried to hail as significant. Nor is there mention of the changes to Capital Gains Tax which have caused so many problems. Nor is there a mention of his desire to map out his vision for the country that we heard so much about.

There is no mention that the tripartite system of banking failed to stop a run on a British bank, resulting in the taxpayer propping it up to the tune of over £20 billion. It gets merely a brief mention in December about how the economy is strong and he’s going to save the day.

Don’t expect to see anything about the Government’s inability to get its own immigration figures right, resulting in correction after correction. As for the loss of 25 million personal bank details from Her Majestys Revenue and Customs it never happened. Repeat after me. It. Never. Happened.

But he is brave – and not a coward… 

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

International Year Of The Potato

2008 will be the International Year of the Potato.

A whole year!

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Benazir Bhutto, Gordon Brown And The Taliban

BENAZIR Bhutto is murdered and Gordon Brown makes a stand:

Gordon Brown: “Knowing, as she did, the threats to her life, the previous attempt at assassination, she risked everything in her attempt to win democracy in Pakistan, and she has been assassinated by cowards afraid of democracy. This is a dark day for everyone who believed in a stable and democratic future for Pakistan. Benazir Bhutto may have been killed by terrorists, but the terrorists must not be allowed to kill democracy in Pakistan. And this atrocity strengthens our resolve that terrorists will not win there, here or anywhere in the world”

No surrender. Unless…

Gordon Brown And The Taliban: “Spies from Britain’s MI6 are thought to have held at least six meetings with key Taliban figures in order to negotiate a peace deal in Afghanistan’s south-eastern Helmand province. The revelations are an embarrassment to British Prime Minister Gordon Brown, who just a fortnight ago denied in the British Parliament any such talks were taking place”

Fearless stuff. Benazir Bhutto is missed…

“If it means sacrificing our lives, if it means sacrificing our liberties to save Pakistan, then we are prepared to risk our lives and we are prepared to risk our liberties, but we are not prepared to surrender our great nation to the militants” – Benazir Bhutto.

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Gordon Brown, Politicians, War On Terror | Comments (27) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Benazi Bhutto Killed By The Religion Of Peace

A WRITER comments on Benazir Bhutto: Quite interesting that India and Pakistan were the same country with the same people. When the people split and two nations were born, democratic Hindu (secular laws) India now flourishes, whereas the democracy-phobic Pakistan with its Islamic citizens has been a total failure.

Now the task for the Muslims and left wingers is to somehow try and blame Israel and America for this.

Join the debate

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Benazir Bhutto Murdered: Al-Qaeda Claims Killing

bhutto Benazir Bhutto Murdered: Al Qaeda Claims KillingBENAZIR Bhutto Is dead. Murdered. The can only be sadness. There are too few politians and leaders to admire. And now there is one less.

Writes Ali Eteraz: Ayman al-Zawahiri has claimed her killing…

Benazir Bhutto, a leading democratic leader of Pakistan, is dead. Suicide bombing in the city of Rawalpindi. 20 others dead. Like her or not, very sad day. Deepest levels of hell for those organizing such bestiality.

I suspect there are going to be riots like crazy. Actually, from what I’m hearing they’ve already started.

Apparently her car was shot at before the suicide bomber killed himself. When the guy started shooting he was apprehended, then he blew himself up. (Geo TV). It was the shot to the neck that killed her, say her people.

Its very important to see what Musharraf does. If he does not arrest any terrorist sympathizers in the military, that’s a problem. Musharraf did kill Akbar Bugti, the Balochi leader, a few years ago.

Rawalpindi, incidentally, was the city where Benazir’s father, Zulfiqar, was hung by General Zia ul Haq in 1978. One of my relatives reminds me that Pakistan’s first Prime Minister Liaquat Ali Khan was also killed in Rawalpindi, circa 1950. The place Benazir was killed is called Liaquat Bagh — Liaquat Garden.

Additionally, there were sniper shots at a Nawaz Sharif — the other democratic leader and former prime minister — rally as well, killing four people. He was not there. Nawaz Sharif is ineligible to run for elections. Benazir was eligible.

On the web:

AFP: “Pakistan President Pervez Musharraf appealed to the nation to remain peaceful on Thursday after the assassination of Benazir Bhutto ‘so that the evil designs of terrorists can be defeated,’ state TV said.”John Podhoretz: “The murder of Bhutto moves foreign policy, the war on terror, and the threat of Islamofascism back into the center of the 2008 campaign.”

Roger Simon: “Since all politics is semi-local, it will be interesting to see what ramifications this event has on domestic presidential politics.”

Statement by the American Islamic Congress on the Murder of Benazir Bhutto

AP: Bush condemns Bhutto assassination.

Jules Crittenden: Who killed Benazir Bhutto? A roundup.

The Belmont Club: “The next few days will show whether the Pakistani Army — for it will surely not be the Taliban — can rededicate itself to electoral democracy. Pakistan needs its George Washington. Unfortunately it only has its Pervez Musharraf.”

Pakistani Spectator: Angry crowds in Rawalpindi are burning shops and vehicles and shouting slogans. Bhutto’s husband and two daughters have left Pakistan for Dubai.

Classical Values: “It not only does not bode well for democracy in Pakistan, but by highlighting the growing instability of a nuclear power, it’s a reminder that isolationism — whether of the Ron Paul, Pat Buchanan, or Dennis Kucinich varieties — is not a great idea.”

Michelle Malkin: “They tried and failed when she returned to Pakistan in October. They tried and failed with a baby suicide bomber. Yesterday, they stopped a 15-year-old with a bomb packed full of nails trying to kill her. Today, they succeeded. Dammit, dammit, dammit”

The Pakistan Policy Blog: Pakistan’s first Prime Minister Liaquat Ali Khan was assassinated in Rawalpindi on October 16, 1951. Bhutto’s father was also hung in Rawalpindi in 1979. Ms. Bhutto joins the list of assassinated family members: her brother Shahnawaz died from poisoning in France in 1985 and her other brother Murtaza was shot to death by police at close range in 1996.

Donklephant: “Well Pakistan, this is your chance. You can see what people will do to stop a more democratic government from gaining a foothold. Will you let this deter you or will you push towards a more just and fair republic?”

Getty Images: Graphic photos of the attack

MSNBC: Bhutto’s supporters at the hospital began chanting “Dog, Musharraf, dog…” Some of them smashed the glass door at the main entrance of the emergency unit, others burst into tears.”

Reuters: “Police said a suicide bomber fired shots at Bhutto as she was leaving the rally venue in a park before blowing himself up. ‘The man first fired at Bhutto’s vehicle. She ducked and then he blew himself up,’ said police officer Mohammad Shahid.”

CNN: Media reports quote her husband saying she suffered a bullet wound to the neck in the attack.

Bhutto: A life. An obituary

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: War On Terror | Comments (12) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The Anorak’s Web

The Wonder of Snowflakes
Strange Christmas Trees
Albert Hastings
Zombie Infection Simulation
Chuck Norris’s tears DO NOT cure cancer
Spiderman Trick
Coming Down

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Paris Hilton Fortune Shrinks

THE inheritance of US heiress Paris Hilton will shrink after her grandfather vowed give most of his fortune to charity.

Hotel magnate Barron Hilton, 80, will donate 97% of his $2.3bn (£1.2bn; 1.6bn euros) fortune to the Conrad N Hilton Foundation.

What odds a charity job for the tireless Paris?

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Benazir Bhutto Injured In Bomb Blast

NOW this: “A suspected suicide attack at a rally of Benazir Bhutto’s Pakistan People’s Party (PPP) has left at least 15 people dead, police say.

“A PPP spokesman has told the BBC that Ms Bhutto was injured. It is not clear how badly. She had just addressed the rally in the town of Rawalpindi”

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

How To Lose It At Celebrity Poker: Casino Bonus

IN “Secrets of a Hollywood survivor” the Times share a skinny latte with “top Hollywood producer MR X”.

He relives a moment:

Proximity to wealth does not make one wealthy. In fact, the closer you are, the more painfully obvious your non-richness becomes.

I once played in a high-stakes poker game with a Very Famous Actor. There were several other high-profile people involved, but the last hand came down to just me and him.

Now I’m no expert, but my pocket aces seemed awfully eager to meet their shiny red brother in the middle of the table. Three aces — I could smell the pot coming my way, and all I could think of was how to collect the chips gracefully. The Famous Actor turned to me and said: “Shall we raise it to $10,000?”

I knew two things for sure: there was no way I could afford the bet, and I’d be damned if I was going to lose to that bully-betting bastard. You know what happened next.

When I got home, my girlfriend asked me how I could lose a quarter of my annual salary on one hand of poker, and I replied — quite logically — that I thought I could beat him.

When she reminded me that he’d starred in a classic movie about poker (which I realised, somewhat belatedly, probably involved months of poker lessons), I knew that it was time to end the relationship. Or, more accurately, have the relationship ended for me.

Have a bet on us 

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Government Relocates Totesport To Tax Haven

TOTESPORT Casino is the internet arm of the Tote, the bookmaker owned and operated by the Government.

The Guardian reports that Totesport is relocating to the offshore tax haven of Alderney.

This enables it to advertise freely in the UK while avoiding UK tax and regulation.

The Government loves tax. You pay it. And you might suppose that its businesses should too. This is a loophole. Cynics might say loopholes exist not by accident but by design. They enable businesses to remain competitive and the Government to look proactive at election time when it vows to close the loophole.
Play them at their own game – with a Casino Bonus

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Appeals On Wheels: Asylum Airways Offers Immigrants Free One-Way Trips

clusterballoon Appeals On Wheels: Asylum Airways Offers Immigrants Free One Way TripsALL aboard Asylum Airways.

Daily Express readers can rest easy. It’s not a re-branded Ariana Airlines, the carrier that brought Afghan hijackers to the UK in 2000. This is a service taking asylum seekers away from Blighty.

Asylum Airways is run by Austrian aviation consultant Heinz Berger. His plan is to offer a kind of Appeals On Wheels bus service, his jets flying around Europe picking up failed asylum seekers and dropping them off somewhere else.

The planes will boast padded rooms, restraints and straps. Mr Berger may have confused political asylum for a lunatic asylum, but Easy jet services to Faliraki are looking on with envy, and interest.

The Independent has a picture of Mr Berger holding a model plane that looks not unlike the kind of vehicle that drops parcels of grain and Blue Peter badges on impoverished Africans.

Might it be that to save the bother of landing the aircraft, and keep carbon footprints to a minimum, Mr Berger’s aircraft will not so much land as dip?

Should Mr Berger’s service solve the asylum issue, expect other similar initiatives, such NHS Air, Credit Crunch Air and for global warmists, Hot Air…

And here 

Posted: 27th, December 2007 | In: Broadsheets, Immigration | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Iraqi Hairdressers Under Siege

HAIRDRESSERS unders siege: “BAGHDAD, Iraq (AP) — Umm Doha cuts hair and waxes eyebrows in secret from her living room because making women look pretty can get a person killed in her Sunni-dominated Baghdad neighborhood.

“Hardline Muslim extremists who believe it is sinful for women to appear beautiful in public have forced many beauticians to move their trade underground.

“Sunni and Shiite militants began blowing up salons roughly two years ago. They killed several stylists and bullied others into putting down their scissors and makeup brushes for good, all in an effort to stamp out what they view as the corrupting spread of Western culture.”


Posted: 26th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Make Money With Google

CLICK and run, says the FT: “Google took the top spot. Its shares rose 47 per cent between its announcement in April of the $3.1bn purchase of Doubleclick, the internet advertising company, and December 14. The search engine outperformed the S&P 500 index by 44 per cent.”

Posted: 26th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Egypt To Copyright Pyramids

pyramid Egypt To Copyright PyramidsAS reported: “Egypt’s MPs are expected to pass a law requiring royalties be paid whenever copies are made of museum pieces or ancient monuments such as the pyramids.

“Zahi Hawass, who chairs Egypt’s Supreme Council of Antiquities, told the BBC the law would apply in all countries.”

Can you copyright a pyramid?

Posted: 26th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Subprime Mortgages: The American Dream

Vivian Norris de Montaigu on subprime mortgages:

 And that is exactly the problem, the money is not really there, it is tied up in your neighbor’s home and someone else’s home. And if your neighbor cannot pay back, or you cannot pay back, the entire system suffers. The problem is that trust was not part of this sub-prime equation once someone greedy got their hands on it. In the beginning, the idea was to actually help people build up equity, therefore strengthen the economy, by buying their own homes. Mortgage companies do not want everyone’s homes back, they want to sell homes. Many people in the business were actually excited that people who normally would not get access to money to purchase a home, could end up doing so and making monthly payments that were less than rent to a faraway landlord. Because one way you begin to touch the American Dream is by building up equity, and it was not those who took subprime loans who ruined the deal, it was the speculators who used cheap money to flip real estate. They were not investing in homes for their families, they were trying to make a fast buck. But both sides lose, when the borrower does not understand the contract he or she is signing, or no one factors into the borrowing equation the higher monthly payment of an arm.


Posted: 26th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Turkey Cracks Down On Legalise Drugs T-Shirts

THE Croydonian looks at the Turkish Daily News and the crackdown in those parts on drug-related t-shirts:

Several stores in the Beyoğlu and Kadıköy districts of Istanbul were raided, with police questioning storeowners whether they kept T-shirts that promoted drugs“.

Says he:

Whether this is a law, or police discretion in operation is not entirely clear, nor yet whether sporting a shirt like so will give visiting tourists a chance to have the full Midnight Express experience.

I imagine that most folk wearing t-shirts like so do it mainly to annoy their parents etc, as a sage shopkeeper interviewed notes, “The ban is meaningless since people using or selling drugs never wear any kind of drug symbols in order to remain inconspicuous“. Well, exactly.

Sartorial questions to one side, there is a very serious issue here as to the right or otherwise to campaign, one way or another for a change in the law. Would a plain t-shirt with the slogan ‘Repeal [insert penal code reference] now‘, without a cannabis leaf, ecstasy pill etc bring down the wrath of The Man in the same way? And if so, what if the penal code reference was to something else, like – cough – Article 301, which prohibits ‘insulting Turkishness‘, by way of pointing the finger over the Armenian genocides?

I like the Pope, the Pope smokes dope…

Posted: 26th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

American Debt Expands At Nearly $1million A Minute

CURRENTLY, the total national US debt stands at $9,136,418,062,457.29.

Like a ticking time bomb, the national debt is an explosion waiting to happen. It’s expanding by about $1.4 billion a day — or nearly $1 million a minute.

What’s that mean to you?

It means almost $30,000 in debt for each man, woman, child and infant in the United States.

Posted: 26th, December 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0