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News | Anorak - Part 492

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We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.

Beauty Queen Ingrid Marie Rivera Coated In Pepper Spray

AS reported: “Just moments after beauty queen Ingrid Marie Rivera beat 29 rivals to become the island’s Miss Universe contestant, she suffered an allergic reaction and broke out in hives.”

And:

It turned out that Miss Rivera’s evening gowns and makeup had been secretly doused with pepper spray.

Miss Rivera started feeling the prickly heat during the competition, but managed to maintain her trademark composure before the judges and cameras throughout the competition.

But when backstage during costume changes, the queen-to-be had to strip off her clothes and apply ice bags to her face and body, which swelled and broke out in a raw rash twice.

“We thought at first it was an allergic reaction, or maybe nerves,” pageant spokesman Harold Rosario said. “But the second time, we knew it couldn’t have been a coincidence.”

And then ALL her clothes fell off…

Says Rivera: “At one point I said, ‘Am I a masochist? But I said, ‘I am with God and this is my goal, regardless of the results”‘Source 

Posted: 27th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Jackson Five To Reunite: Michael Jackson Too

MICHAEL Jackson is set to join the rest of the Jackson Five for a world tour next year, according to his brother Jermaine.

Says Jermaine: “We feel we have to do it one more time. We owe that to the fans and to the public.” Ands Michael?  “He has to be, he is a Jackson. He was at the meetings. Michael will be involved.”

But which will be the real Jackson Foive. Given the off-cuts and enhancements, there could be no less then four Jackson Fives touring at any one  time – and all of them authentic…

Posted: 27th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Gillian Gibbons And The Teddy Bear Called Muhammed

IF you go down to Sudan todsay…: “A British schoolteacher has been arrested in Sudan accused of insulting Islam’s Prophet, after she allowed her pupils to name a teddy bear Muhammad.”

Colleagues of Gillian Gibbons, 54, from Liverpool, said she made an “innocent mistake” by letting the six and seven-year-olds choose the name.

Ms Gibbons was arrested after several parents made complaints.

The BBC has learned the charge could lead to six months in jail, 40 lashes or a fine.

It’s no picnic…

Source

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Gillian Gibbons, Twitterings, War On Terror | Comments (14) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Mind The Gap: Voice of London Emma Clarke Underground Silenced

TO London’s beady-eyed Tube dwellers, Emma Clarke is The Voice.

And now she has been sacked after allegedly criticising London Underground.As the BBC reports: “Ms Clarke, from Altrincham, Greater Manchester, upset her paymasters by allegedly saying she did not use the Tube because it was ‘dreadful’.

LU said it would not be offering her further work but Ms Clarke said she had been “wildly misquoted”.

She told BBC News: “What I actually said was that travelling in a Tube train would be dreadful for me, listening to my own voice and seeing the haunted faces of commuters being subjected to me telling them to ‘mind the gap’.

“I would find it quite an uncomfortable experience in the same way that when I call a company when I’m their on hold voice and it’s me saying – please press 2 for accounts – it’s a creepy experience to be honest.”

Ms Clarke also made a series of spoof announcements on a website promoting her voiceover work.

An LU spokesman said: “It’s not because of the spoof announcements. It’s because she has criticised the Underground system.”

“Some of the spoof announcements are very funny. But Emma is a bit silly to go round slagging off her client’s services.”

But it is a crap service…

In one announcement, Ms Clarke, a mother of two who has worked for the Underground since 1999, says: “We would like to remind our American tourist friends that you are almost certainly talking too loudly.”

She said she was “disappointed and perplexed” that LU had not contacted her but instead had decided to dismiss her via the media.

“I can’t get in touch with anyone at LU to explain I was wildly misquoted,” she said.

“Mind the gap,” says Emma Clarke. “And watch out for the militant workers, filthy carriages, dark stairwells, piss-soaked seats… etc. etc…

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (9) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Conservative MP Calls For Investifation Into Footballers’ Salaries

DIZZY sees “Class warfare in Southend West?”

What a strange motion by the Tory MP for Southend West, David Amess (also signed by Bob Russell, Lib Dem MP for Colchester). Amess has called on the FA to reassess footballers salaries, managers salaries, and also the ticket prices.

That this House calls on the Football Association to re-examine the organisation of the country’s national sport, paying particular regard to the salaries of football players and their managers; and further calls on the Association to look at the ticket prices for Premier League and international matches on the basis of affordability and value for money.

Here’s the thing though, do these two both want to kill off their local clubs? Colchester and Southend United both charge around £15 to £20 for tickets. Your average Premiership side charges about double that.

So if they’re price is brought down, and you pay more for the higher leagues because of quality of football, then clubs like Southend and Colchester will have to reduce their prices and struggle to operate.

Frankly, politicians should keep their noses out of the business of football. To see a Tory MP calling for interventions on salaries and prices is even stranger.

Should MPs be paid on a performance-related scheme?

Source 

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Diana Was Pregnant, Maybe

PRINCESS Diana might have been pregnant, or not: 

The pathologist who examined the body of Diana, Princess of Wales, has admitted that she could have been pregnant at the time of her death, but not beyond three weeks.

Dr Robert Chapman, who carried out a post-mortem on the night of her death, said the Princess’s womb and ovaries did not display the tell-tale changes he would expect to see if she were pregnant.

But he admitted such indications would not necessarily be visible in the first three weeks after conception.

So she might have been. Or not. She might have been expecting twins. Or not. She might have been preparing to put her hair in a bun…

Source

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Should A Killer Get Alimony: Linda Calbi V Chris Sokoloff

“LEGAL tussle: Should killer get alimony? – The decision was issued in the case of Linda Calbi, who is serving a three-year prison term after pleading guilty to beating her son, Matt, on Aug. 17, 2003, during a violent argument at their home. He died hours later from internal bleeding and cardiac arrest.”

And:

“I don’t understand how anyone can look my brother in the face and tell him that he has to pay this woman alimony,” said Brian Sokoloff, brother of Linda Calbi’s ex-husband, Chris. “Half of this opinion espouses sympathy for my brother, and the other half is saying, ‘Too bad.’ ”

Is this Any Only In America story?

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Hillary CLinton And Huma Abedin

THE Drudge Report notes: “The TIMES of London starts ‘The Ugliest Month’ with a full page photo takeout on Hillary Clinton and her beautiful personal assistant.”

“Hillary Clinton has been accused of having an affair with Huma Abedin,” reads the caption.

The splash stunned British readers and angered campaign insiders.

“This does not even qualify as tabloid trash… it’s ridiculous and reckless,” a Hillary confidante explained over the weekend.

The Times (of London!) tabloid trash?

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Just This Day: Global Toerlance Demands Silence

PRESS Release of the day on Just This Day: “26 November 2007 – A 59 year old grandmother from Hammersmith, West London is making an audacious bid to silence 2.7 billion minds and mobile phones on Wednesday 28 November, as part of a global push for peace and quiet.”

Ex-nurse Elizabeth Edmunds, mother of six and grandmother of five, is asking every mobile phone user on the planet to put their minds and mobiles into silent mode for three minutes at 10am GMT, in a mission to demonstrate the world-changing power of silence and stillness.

Over 20,000 people in over 20 countries have already signed up to join the worldwide initiative, with businesspeople, schoolchildren, religious groups, dance groups and even 4,000 children from a refugee camp in Darfur joining in. Now Elizabeth is turning her attention to the mighty mobile phone, which she sees as symbolic of the noise, stress and lack of stillness in modern life.

The cmaping is being coordianted by – get this! – Global Tolerance…

File under: Beyind Parody 

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Sctrachcards Reshape Turkey

THE Croydonaian notes: “Hot on the heels of the British punters who found negative numbers a tad confusing, now trouble in Turkey“:

The Finance Ministry announced Friday that scratchies issued by the lottery agency that featured a map of Turkey, with buyers scratching off the eastern part of the map to see if they have won anything, will no longer be sold in order to put an end to the criticism. In recent days reports appeared in some newspapers that criticized the fact that buyers had to scratch off the eastern part of the map, with some claiming that the scratchies carried an implicit separatist message….It said the criticisms voiced in the media had spurred Finance Minister Kemal Unakıtan to order an inquiry and the ministry had decided to withdraw the scratchies that featured the map to end any misunderstanding“.

Just say no to the National Lottery…..

Source 

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Anorak Forums: Virgin Sells Northern Rock Short

AGW writes in the Anorak Forums: “Virgin Group and its consortium has been named as preferred bidder in the rescue of Northern Rock.”

And:

Inside track reports suggest the group is plotting to issue new shares at a price as low as 20p – Northern Rock closed at 86p on Friday.

The Virgin plan would offer shareholders some hope of getting something.
Roger Lawson, of the UK Shareholders Association, said it welcomed the move. “We believe that it is important that shareholders have a say in the outcome of what happens to their company, and the assets of the business.”

The question has to be asked: “Why?”
These are the same shareholders who allowed the immediate past resigning executives to let Northern Rock go on its extraordinary journey.

Read on… 

And join in 

Posted: 26th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Toni Collette: Actors And Actor-Vists

AS TIM Blair reports,  actress Toni Collette seems uncertain:

In 2004, she said

Our children watch TV to learn. If they grow up with American standards and expectations in our relatively naive land, it’ll create such a stifling sense of confusion. They are already eating McDonald’s, drinking Coca-Cola and being swamped by Disney.

We don’t want Australian kids to grow up with American accents.

And in 2007:

Toni Collette is considering a move to the United States, depending on the success of a pilot television show she is planning to make with Steven Spielberg.

Collette, who is in the late stages of pregnancy …

File under Actors as actor-vists…

Posted: 25th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Spice Girls: Tea Cup In Storm Row

SAYS a  Spice Girls’ spokesman said: “The Spice Girls would like to make it clear that they have not cancelled their Buenos Aires show.”A story has appeared on several websites that includes a fake email and competition from the girls. The fake email claims that due to the demand so far in the UK and the US this show is going to be cancelled.

“The email goes onto say that they will be running some competitions for their South American fans to travel to the UK to watch a show.

“This is not the case and this email is 100% unofficial and has nothing to so with the Spice Girls.”

But is that one real? This one could run and run and run and run…

Posted: 25th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Tory MP Resigns Over BNP Speaker

TORY MP Dr Julian Lewis has resigned from The Oxford Union in protest at its decision to invite Nick Griffin and David Irving to speak.

“Nick Griffin, leader of the British National Party (BNP) and David Irving – jailed for denying the Holocaust – were invited by the union debating society.”

The MP for New Forest East says the students should be “ashamed”.

More here

Posted: 25th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Floyd Mayweather Should Be Sent to The Naughty Corner

SAYS Floyd Mayweather, American boxer, of his British opponet Ricky Hatton: “I wish I was in prison with you. I’d make you my b****.”

Says Hatton. “What Floyd doesn’t know is that I don’t get insulted. But he was very offensive. He told me he wanted to buttf*** me.”

The boxing is a cry for help…

Posted: 25th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


San Francisco Chronicle Tricks Bloggers And Trolls

THE San Francisco Chronicle has a trick in their commenting software - As LGF reports, “post a comment at the SFGate.com web site, and the administrators delete it, you will not know it’s been deleted, because it still shows up when you look at the page, as long as you’re signed in to your SFGate account.”

You see your comment as being posted. The rest of us see a message like, “This comment has been deleted”.

Genius. Can we do it here?

Do you want it?

Posted: 25th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


US Police Taser Man For Speeding: Give A Man A Uniform

POLICE taser man for speeing – “UHP (Utah Highway Patrol) tasers man in front of pregnant wife and baby over an alleged speeding ticket”

The land of the free…

Remind me what the police are for?

Posted: 25th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Spice Girls Thank All Their Remaining Fans, One By One

THE Spice Girls have sent the following email to fans who signed up for tickets to their Buenos Aires concert:

“Hi there!

First of all, we would like to thank all our fans who bought our Greatest Hist Album, it’s doing great!

As you know, the demand for our concert tickets in the USA and the UK has been really overwhelming. So, in order to meet that demand, it’s not possible for us to keep extending the tour because of our solo projects and family obligations. That means we are unable to hold a concert in Buenos Aires, Argentina. We’re incredibly sorry for the delay in making this annoucement, but we have been really trying to fit this date in our schedule.

To make this up for you all, we’ll be having some great competitions for our South American fans. The lucky winners will attend one of our London shows (flight and accomodation included!) and will receive an All Access Pass! Isn’t that MAJOR?

Keep checking thespicegirls.com for news on rehearsals and exclusive contents!

Best Wishes

Emma, Geri, Mel B, Melanie C, and Victoria

xxxxx”

MAJOR? To cancel an announced concert? Surely, MINOR… 

Posted: 25th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


David Beckham Bounces Back

AFTER losing to Croatia, David Beckham wasted no time in getting back on the (clothes) horse – he flew to China to help launch the “Motorola Razr2 V8″ Luxury Edition cell phone…

You show ‘em, Dave…

Posted: 24th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Waxing Lyrical On Kevin Rudd

JOHN HOWARD is no longer leader in Australia. Kevin Rudd is. EU REf notes:

It seems that John Howard, the second longest serving Prime Minister of Australia has lost the election. Final results are not yet in but

Official figures from the Australian Electoral Commission showed Labor well ahead with more than 60 percent of the ballots counted. An Australian Broadcasting Corp. analysis showed that Labor would get at least 81 places in the 150-seat lower house of Parliament — a clear majority.

ABC radio reported that Howard aides said the prime minister had phoned Rudd to concede defeat. Rudd was expected to formally claim victory later Saturday.

There will be much discussion in the days to come but I suspect that as in Britain so in Australia – people get rather bored with long-serving governments.

If Kevin Rudd really does change the Howard policy on close alliance with the United States, particularly in Iraq and on man-made-climate-change (and just because he says so, it is not a given) then his victory might be bad news for the Anglosphere.

Then again, there has been little talk of changing Australian policy on the need for immigrants to accept national identity.

All of that is in the future. What I want to know is why should Howard’s defeat be described as “humiliating” by journalists? He has carried off four victories and been the second longest serving Prime Minister of the country. He has undoubtedly left his mark on that country’s politics and Kevin Rudd will find it difficult to erase that.

Now he has lost an election. It is still possible that he might lose his own seat as the postal votes are not in yet. That will be somewhat humiliating though, again, there must have been some changes in electoral boundaries. As for the rest, it is merely that the whirligig of time and democratic process has come round again.

I predict there will be enormous amounts of gloating in the media because a staunch Anglospherist and ally of the United States has lost, as predicted, his fifth election.

Kevin Ruud? Oh, him…

Posted: 24th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Humans Shortening Universe Life

SAYS the Telegraph: “Forget about the threat that mankind poses to the Earth: our activities may be shortening the life of the universe too.”

Death to humanity!!

Posted: 24th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Call Centre Worker Jailed For Dealing Drugs

AND you thought all call centre employees were battery-farmed drones:

A 27-year-old man who masterminded a multi-million pound heroin operation from his desk at a South Yorkshire call centre has been jailed for 11 years.
Shoukat Ali Yaqoob, from Sheffield, was part of a gang supplying Yorkshire and the Midlands with drugs valued at £10m, Gloucester Crown Court heard.

Drug dealing – terrible etc.  But can’t we all find something to admire?

Source

Posted: 24th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Let’s Hear It From The BNP And Holocaust Deniers

A SPOT of racism for the Oxbridge classes – nothing new in that:

Despite opposition, the Oxford Union Debating Society members voted by a margin of 2 to 1 to continue to extend an invite to the BNP’s Nick Griffin.

David Irving, who was jailed for Holocaust denial, will also be invited.

The move was opposed by the Oxford Student Union and the university’s Muslim and Jewish societies.

The Oxford Union Debating Society said it was important to give people of all views a platform.

Luke Tryl, president of the society, said: “The men were not being given a platform to extol their views, but were coming to talk about the limits for free speech.

Free speachm, is it? Exercise your rights. Complete the line: Luke Tryl is a – - – -!

More here

Source

Posted: 24th, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Islamic Mein Kampf

THE Terrorism Awareness Project Feature Presentation – presents The Islamic Mein Kampf.

Follow the link…

Posted: 23rd, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Grayson Perry, The Tranny Potter, Scared To Speak Out Aginat Radical Islam

BRITISH artists like Grayson Perry fear reprisals if they speak out against radical Islam:

Grayson Perry, the cross-dressing potter, Turner Prize winner and former Times columnist, said that he had consciously avoided commenting on radical Islam in his otherwise highly provocative body of work because of the threat of reprisals.

“I’ve censored myself,” Perry said at a discussion on art and politics organised by the Art Fund. “The reason I haven’t gone all out attacking Islamism in my art is because I feel real fear that someone will slit my throat.”

For those unfamiliar with Mr Perry, he is a straight man known to dress as a woman called  ‘Claire’…

If that’s not enough to get him killed by the Iranians or some other group of nutters, he should not worry about trying harder….

 Source 

Posted: 23rd, November 2007 | In: Twitterings | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0