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News | Anorak - Part 492

News Category

We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.

Understanding The Daily Mail Project

BEN Goldacre sees hoq the Mail, like all good middle-class sods, has it every way it can get it:

I am Health Book Of The Week in the Daily Mail (and after all the mean things I’ve said about them). To me this says a great deal about the strangeness of the Daily Mail project – barrages of nonsense, interspersed with occasional moments of incongruous clarity. This phenomenon, for me, reached its pinnacle in their front page article on how miracle pixie dust made a man’s finger grow back. You will remember that this story was nonsense. After all the front page excitement, hidden away at the very end of their article, was a quote from someone who actually knew about this stuff, who said, quite simply, that the papers entire front page story was all cock. Brilliant, strange, and oddly endearing.

The Mail – if they will read it, they will write it…

Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Ahmadinejad Accepts Israel’s Right To Exist

SAYS Mamoud Ahmadinejad:

If they [the Palestinians] want to keep the Zionists, they can stay … Whatever the people decide, we will respect it. I mean, it’s very much in correspondence with our proposal to allow Palestinian people to decide through free referendums.

Peter Tatchell concludes:

Since most Palestinians are willing to accept a two-state solution, the Iranian president is, in effect, agreeing to Israel’s right to exist and opening the door to a peace deal that Iran will endorse.

And then once there aer two states he can blow up one of them…

Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (20) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The New York Sun Sets

CLIVE Davis says so long to the New York Sun:

The New York Sun, conservative rival to the Old Gray Lady, is closing down after six years of trying to beat the odds. Urging Dick Cheney to run for president was little short of unhinged, and the coverage of Europe often had a whiff of Islamophobia about it,  but the paper did publish some quality pieces too.

A newspaper dies, and in small room in London a web publisher smiles…

Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Twin Judge Swaps Places With Criminal Sister

IN Italy, a woman who worked as a part-time judge as well as a lawyer was “substituted by her identical twin sister in court so she would not lose out on legal fees when she had two simultaneous engagements.”

The 54-year-old twins from northern Italy have now been charged with fraud and will go on trial in January, Italy’s leading newspaper, Corriere della Sera, reported Friday on its website.

One of the twins, identified only as Gabriella, worked primarily as a lawyer but also as an honorary judge, a part-time, paid position that entails helping full-time judges when their case load is heavy.

When Gabriella was called to be a substitute judge she sent her sister twin Patrizia to stand in for her at an existing engagement as a defense lawyer elsewhere in the Milan area.

The problem was that sister Patrizia was not a lawyer like sister Gabriella but charged the clients anyway.

Which of them did the better job is unsaid…

Source

Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Indians Hang Up On The Call Centre

THE Call Centre has done more to damage Anglo-Indian relations than last night’s vindaloo:

A 23-year-old man, barely out of college, has been recovering from a heart attack in a hospital. The doctor’s diagnosis: modern lifestyle – stress and odd hours of work.

He works at a call centre in Mumbai

Alarmed?

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Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Heidi Montag And Spencer Pratt Cure The World’s Ills

14 sees that Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are the cure for all the world’s ills:

Global economic crisis, possible fiscal bailout repercussions, Venezuela to build nuclear technology with Russia, largest bank collapse in US history, melamine now found in chocolate, world faces pandemic of antibiotic resistance, processed food and high fructose corn syrupworld obesity crisis, collapse of the honey bee, rising food prices, Sarah Palin, dyingpolluted oceans, genetically modified food, job losses, foreclosed homes, amphibian decline, Hurricane Ike devastation, pharmaceuticals in our water supply, and I could keep going on and on. However, the bright spot nestled within these world problems is the uplifting Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt slide show that sat on Yahoo’s front page all weekend.

Better now…

Such a welcome distraction – don’t you feel better now?

Better now….

Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Nadine Dorries Castrates The Recess Monkey

NADINE Dorries, the Christian fundamentalist in white, is on the hunt for a blogger. Run, Recess Monkey, Run:

Apart from the other 100 people in the room. Nadine Dorries is going to stop blogging. She said earlier that if she meets a nameless other blogger – /present in Brum today/, as I breeze shot with him – ‘he will father no children, I tell you’.

Nadine is the woman in white…

Christian Fundamentalists Aborted: Nadine Dorries Tagged

The Biggest Boobs In Westminster: Jacqui Smith’s Knockers

Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


How The MSM Back Obama And Hunts Palin

HOW the Main Stream Media backs Obama and hunts down Palin:

Off the record, every suspicion you have about MSM being in the tank for O is true. We have a team of 4 people going thru dumpsters in Alaska and 4 in arizona. Not a single one looking into Acorn, Ayers or Freddiemae. Editor refuses to publish anything that would jeopardize election for O, and betting you dollars to donuts same is true at NYT, others. People cheer when CNN or NBC run another Palin-mocking but raising any reasonable inquiry into obama is derided or flat out ignored. The fix is in, and its working.” I asked permission to reprint without attribution and it was granted.

The Anchoress is praying:

I suppose this is why print media and the press in general don’t care about their tumbling revenues; when The Pelosi gets the regulated internet and restricted Congress that she wants, and Obama gets his thugs and his Justice Department monitoring, intimidating and shutting down alternative media (and the dissenting voices we’ve been told are “patriotic” when a Republican is in the White House) the incestuous mainstream press will go back to being the only game in town. Pravda West.

The BBC is the worst…

But Palin is new – what do we know about her?

Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


MI6 Agent Sells Al Qaeda Data On EBay

IF the Government can be relied upon for anything it is to lose our confidential data.

With one in four of us working for the State, the Government has lots of data to lose.

The one hope is that whoever finds your child benefits history will be unable to make it tally with information they already have on your driving record, your time in prison, your work for national defence and more.

(Image: Beau Bo D’Or)

Today’s data disaster is that an MI6 agent left secrets about Al-Qaeda on the digital camera he sold on eBay.

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Posted: 30th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Banks Know Something

Judging from the way the banks are still refusing to lend to each other, they have more concern about what the banks are really holding than even the most pessimistic outsiders…- Chenier

Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (13) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Not Horseshit As Tynside Pub Bans Horse

NO Horseshit in Tyneside pub:

A Tyneside pub has called time on one of its regular visitors after the premises were refurbished.

Peggy, a 12-year-old mare, used to enjoy a pint of beer and a packet of crisps alongside her owner at the Alexandra Hotel in Jarrow.

However, she is no longer allowed to prop up the bar following a refit which included new carpets.

And a limit on the all-you-can-eat salad…

Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Pramface Sarah Palin And Why Republican Men Are Not Sexually Inadequate

CBC columnist Heather Mallick uses her September 5 column to call Bristol Palin a “pramface.”

Via

Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (32) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Gary Glitter Banned From France And Spain

GARY Glitter has been banned from travelling to France and Spain.

A spokesman for HM Court Service says:

“On Thursday at Ashford Magistrates Court, in Kent, police applied for and were successful in an application to prevent Foreign Travel to France and Spain until 25 March 2009 by Mr Paul Gadd. Paul Gadd did not attend in person but was represented by Corker Binning Solicitors.”

Gary Glitter walks the land. He wears boots to see in your windows…

There Is No Escaping Gary Glitter

Gary Glitter’s Gonna Get You

Madeleine McCann: The Bill, Durham Police And Gary Glitter Is Paedos’ ‘Our Maddie’

Gary Glitter Walks The Land

How The Media Made Gary Glitter Appear And Disappear

Kim Jong-il And Gary Glitter Are Missing

Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


BBC Bias Against Sarah Palin

THE BBC does not rate Sarah Palin highly:

He must be doing it deliberately, surely. Please tell me how this can be defended. It’s Webb, of course – on Palin, of course, who he describes as “the woman rational, educated Americans regard with ever-increasing horror”. What exactly is the point of the editorial guidelines when they’re so clearly ignored by the senior staff?

At least he doesn’t communicate with his eyes…

BBC Is Hung Up On David Blaine

Source

Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Greenest Man In America

WHO is Chicago’s Greenest person? No, not the most stupid. Being green no longer means being straight off the banana boat, immature and gullible. It means being smart and up with the latest global warming trends.

The Chicago Tribune goes “hunting for the Chicagoan who has the lowest carbon footprint. “

Any luck?

We found him: Ken Dunn, who rides his bike year-round, eats homegrown vegetables and otherwise leads a sustainable lifestyle.

Great. How can we be like Ken?

Ken Dunn, who is considered the greenest person in Chicago, eats discarded or expired food that he stores in his refrigerator.

That’s so green it’s mouldy. But how green is she, what about his agonists? He’s..:

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Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Anorak Scoops The, Er, Daily Star

ANORAK scoops the tabloids yet again:

Islamic Terrorists Audition For Dirty Dozen In British Jail…

HERE’S a little tale in Anorak’s occasional series on the life and times of long-term
sentence terrorists. (See Terrorist Attack{tics}).
It may make you feel proud to be British. I doubt it.

Following three separate incidents involving Muslim terrorist life sentence prisoners in Frankland High Security Prison on the outskirts of Durham City, weekend reports say the newly-formed Ministry of Justice is secretly considering a Muslim only prison.

It’s all there

Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


India’s Human -Powered Ferris Wheel

WHO needs electricity to have fun? Not the Indians:

Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Islamic Terrorists Audition For Dirty Dozen In British Jail

“TERRORISTS inmates are recruiting a new army of extremists in British prisons,” says the Star Says column.

Have the jihadis been watching the Dirty Dozen? Is Abu Hamza Lee Marvin 32ith an in-built Swiss Army knife?

“Worried bosses are now thinking about housing all Britain’s terror lags in one super-prison to keep them away from others.”

The Daily Star can read their thoughts. It rubs it temples and urges restraint, saying that placing the terror lags in one jail “would light a time bomb that could destroy Britain”.

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Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (13) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Ales To The Thieves: Drinking Pays Better Than Banks

IF you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago, you
would have $49.00 left.

With Merrill Lynch, you would have had $16.50 left of the original
$1,000.00.

With Lehman Brothers, you would probably have nothing, but if you were
lucky, less than $5.00 left.

However, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank
all of the beer, then turned in the bottles and cans for the recycling
REFUND, you would have $214.00 cash.

June

Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Grab A Torch For Banned Books Week

IT’S Banned Books Week.In America:

Banned Books Week is the only national celebration of the freedom to read. It was launched in 1982 in response to a sudden surge in the number of challenges to books in schools, bookstores and libraries. More than a thousand books have been challenged since 1982.

Can a student just stand up and challenge the book in class?

According to the American Library Association, more than 400 books were challenged in 2007. The 10 most challenged titles were:

It’s the must-buy guide:

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Posted: 28th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Leathery Pelosi’s Folsom Street Fair

IT’S the Folsom Street Fair. Exhibit A:

In remarks prepared for a press conference this morning at San Francisco’s City Hall, Americans For Truth President Peter LaBarbera said that – like homosexual “marriage” — the public perversions and nudity allowed to go on at the annual “Folsom Street Fair” in House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s district represent America’s deepening moral crisis.

What’s going on?

The Folsom Street Fair is a true San Francisco original. With over 400,000 people in attendance covering 13 city blocks, the Fair is the largest leather/fetish event in the world and the third largest, single-day outdoor event in California. Folsom Street Events is thrilled to celebrate the historic 25th Folsom Street Fair with style and a week’s worth of truly outstanding events and programs over the course of San Francisco Leather Week.

Leathery skin…

Posted: 28th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Free Chlamydia Tests At Labour Party Conference

THOSE party conferences are just an excuse to debate into the small hours:

Maybe it was something in my eyes, but as I wandered around the GMEX picking up freebies in the form of frisbies, screwdrivers, pens, paperclips and countless varieties of sweets, I was approached by an operative of the Terrence Higgins Trust who handed me a free chlamydia test.

What are Tories tested for?

Posted: 28th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


CPF Bust Heather Locklear

TMZ reports that Heather Locklear was pulled over while driving in the Santa Barbara area, and the Celebrity Police Force are “conducting tests to determine if Locklear was under the influence of drugs”.

And if not, why not?

And here’s the rub:

This could set up a bizarre custody battle given that Locklear and ex-hubby Richie Sambora have both been busted for similar charges.

Sambora pleaded no contest to DUI back in Marc…

Bizzare, how? Do we see who the CPF spends more time with and give them the child..?

Posted: 28th, September 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Ibrahim Eissa On Egypt’s Sick Dictatorship

IN Egypt, there is no freedom of speech:

Ibrahim Eissa, editor of the independent daily al-Dustor, was originally convicted in March and sentenced to six months on charges of reporting and publishing false information that questioned the health of 80-year-old President Hosni Mubarak. The judges at the time ruled that a series of articles he published threatened national stability and caused foreign investors to pull their money out of the country.

What money?

Ibrahim Eissa .. it started in Ramadan and it ended in Ramadan

Posted: 28th, September 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Mother Nature’s Hot Flush: Global Warming Groups Make Us Hotter

A TEAM of scientists from the University of Toronto team have found that “people feeling excluded said a room was colder than those feeling included”.

Yeah, having no friends keeps you cool. Does Mother Nature have too many friends? Are Friends of The Earth giving Her a hot flush?

The BBC contacts a Dr Lesley Prince, a lecturer in psychology at Birmingham University. He tells us:

“I particularly like the idea that if people are feeling despondent or lonely, you could help them feel better by putting the temperature up.”

Crank your engines. Plug in an extra fridge. And let’s all feel better about ourselves…

Spotter: June

Posted: 28th, September 2008 | In: News | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0