News Category

We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.

Indian Man Divorces Wife Impersonator

CAN you be divorced from someone you aren’t married to?

An Indian man who took an impersonator to court to get a divorce faces legal action after his real wife found out, lawyers said on Friday.

Sanjib Saha presented a woman as his wife in a lower court in the eastern city of Kolkata this month. Both said they sought a mutual divorce.

The court consented to it.

Saha’s real wife was then asked to leave the marital home. She has since appealed the ruling at a higher court, charged her husband with cheating and the original divorce was suspended.

“The case exposed the legal loopholes in our system,” Kaushik Chanda, lawyer of Saha’s real wife, said.

Impersonators. Tsk!

Posted: 19th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Owner Gives Pet Goldfish Pierced Lip

BY hook:

“Goldfish have a 30-second memory. And how many live fish are there out there with hooks stuck in them? At least this one had jewellery!” says William. “The fish seemed unaffected. He ate normally, and the piercing didn’t weigh him down or affect his ballast.”

William used a 5mm labret with a light acrylic end and did the piercing freehand while his apprentice held the fish, which was taken out of the water, then put back straight after. Although the fish is now dead (not because of the piercing – he died when William moved and the tank’s temperature increased), customers loved it. “A few hippies gave me flack,” says William, “but once the lure argument was brought up, they agreed it wasn’t any worse.”

And William has no regrets. In fact, he says he’d pierce a fish again. “As long as it was a fish of substantial size,” he adds. “I’ve been asked to pierce Siamese Fighting Fish, but there’s no way. If I did, though, I’d only charge for the jewellery, not the service.”

Can fish wear earrings?


Posted: 19th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Consensus On Man-Made Global Warming Has Collapsed

AL Gore is too late to save the world:

The leading experts predict that we have less than 10 years to make dramatic changes in our global warming pollution lest we lose our ability to ever recover from this environmental crisis,” Gore stated. But the former Vice President, who has been warning of a 10-year “tipping point” for several years now, appears to be unaware that the United Nations already started the 10-year countdown — in 1989!

As you were, Al

Posted: 19th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

China’s Citizen’s Anti-Terrorist Handbook

THE Olympic Games are coming to Beijing. It’s goona be just terrific. But watch out for the baddies. Some of the Chinese jihadists have knives.

(Picture: Beau B D’Or Website)

In readiness, China’s Public Security Ministry has released a Citizen’s Anti-terrorist Handbook. The Beijing News broadcasts the advice:

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Shane Richmond On Private Eye And SEO

WRITES Shane Richmond in the Telegraph:

When Private Eye dabbles in the internet the result is usually both comic and alarming. It’s like having a blacksmith repair your car; it’s amusing to watch him bash around aimlessly for a minute but you soon start to worry that he might do some real damage.

According to Eye:

news hacks are sent a memo three or four times a day from the website boffins listing the top subjects being searched in the last few hours on Google. They are then exepected to write stories accordingly and/or get as many of those key words into the first par of their story.”

Martin Samuels takes up the point:

It is therefore, the aim of this column to mention, specifically, lucidly and not in gratuitous list format, the 75 most searched for topics on the web (no 37), in the hope that this will become the page that it is impossible for the Facebook (33) generation to avoid, much like transport chaos in the North London area whenever Arsenal (24) are at home. If successful, 99 per cent of the world’s computer users will be directed to this column as relentlessly as a recent graduate from the super skinny me (36) programme is drawn to a nightspot where Cristiano Ronaldo (56) hangs out. And, forget local issues, the turgid sagas of Newcastle United (34) and Michael Owen‘s (44) missing form, we’re aiming high, going for the worldwide audience: from Pakistan (74) to Cyprus (45). And on that note I would like to wish all my readers a happy Chinese new year (71).

SEO gets you noticed – the writers maintain the audience…

Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Madeleine McCann: English Request For Secrecy

ANORAK looks at developments in the Madeleine McCann case. Writes AGW on the Forums:

While Robert Murat and Co .were settling large sums of money in London’s High Court yesterday there appears to have an intriguing little development in Portugal. It may not have been a good day to bury bad news – it travels very quickly these days.

The Portuguese tabloid Correio Da Manha produced a Page One lead with no mention of Mr Murat or his new riches.

It says under the banner headline:
English in Portimao to protect secrecy

‘CM’ reveals : Found 15 of the 19 genetic markers
A magistrate and two policemen, including Stuart Prior, responsible for liaison with PJ, were yesterday at the Court of Portimão to try to convince Magellan Meneses, prosecutor, not to release the secret of justice of the whole process of disappearance of Madeleine. One of the things that the British claim that it is not known is the report of the laboratory in Birmingham, which states that “15 of the 19 genetic markers found traces collected in a bag in the car the couple coincide [with the child disappeared].
The claim (request)was denied”

We are grateful to two Opinions posters, firstly Rasputin and Jo for the information and Google translations. The subsequent discussion in the Opinion section of the site has been about the reason for such a request.

Was it bad day? Does anyone have a close contact in Portugal who can tell us exactly what is going on?

Was the request to suppress evidence and, if so, what evidence? What reasons were given for that request and was the request made in open court? Do other Portuguese newspapers carry the story?

Our view is this may be very important.

What is interesting about the posting above is my assumption you will all know instantly I am referring to the case of the missing child Madeleine McCann and the police investigation into it…and you probably did. Frightening isn’t it?

From my point of view a good bit is the Google translation converts what would have been a Sun/ Mirror/ Express/ Mail banner screaming Exclusive!!!!! as the Correio Da Manha bleating “CM reveals”…not quite what the sub-editors intended at all…take look via the link above.

Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (285) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Living Oprah: I Will Live As Oprah Winfrey Advises

I WILL live the Oprah Winfrey way:

I am performing an experiment: for one year, I will live as Oprah advises on her television show, on her website, and in the pages of her magazines. The tagline to her website is “Live Your Best Life” and I wonder, will I truly find bliss if I commit wholeheartedly to her lifestyle suggestions?

Spotter: Paul Constant

Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Woman Sees Of Robbers With Broom (Video)

WOMAN fights of robbers with a broom:

Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

StrategyPage Says The War In Iraq Is Over

WHAT war in Iraq. This is the aftermath, stupid, says StrategyGate:

The war is basically over in Iraq, but the peace brings with it a return to the corruption and inefficiency that has cursed this part of the world for centuries. There are other annoying habits, like demanding “compensation” for any real or imagined loss that might possibly be pinned on U.S. troops. It’s also popular to demand, with a straight face, that U.S. troops fix utilities, schools and whatever else people want, but are unwilling to take care of themselves. Peace has not brought out the best in the Iraqi people.

We won.

Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Andrew Bolt Spots The End Of Global Warming

ANDREW Bolt looks at global warming, and how, well, it�s not happening.

These are the seven graphs that should make you ask: What? Has global warming now stopped?

Look for yourself. They show that the world hasn�t warmed for a decade, and has even cooled for several years.

Sea ice now isn�t melting, but spreading. The seas have not just stopped rising, but started to fall.

Nor is the weather getting wilder. Cyclones, as well as tornadoes and hurricanes, aren�t increasing and the rain in Australia hasn�t stopped falling.

What�s more, the slight warming we saw over the century until 1998 still makes the world no hotter today than it was 1000 years ago.

In fact, it�s even a bit cooler…

Lots of hot air, though…


Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Carbon Trading Leads To Job Cuts In Germany

IS the West as green as it looks?

The price of European emission permits is rising so rapidly that German companies are threatening to leave the country. Thousands of jobs could be lost. And the environment may, in the end, be no better off.

They sat silently through two lectures, but then they couldn’t control their anger any longer. The civil servants from the Environment Ministry, the Environment Agency and the German Emissions Trading Authority made it sound easy for industry to take up carbon trading. It was just too much for the managers to tolerate.

“If that’s the shape the trading will take, we will simply move our cement operation to Ukraine,” a cement factory manager shouted into the lecture hall. “Then there won’t be any trading here, nothing will be produced here anymore — the lights will simply go out here.”

Goodnight Berlin…

Posted: 18th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Fraser Nelson On Brown’s Porkies

DOES Gordon Brown tell the whole truth and nothing but? Fraser Nelson looks at the details…

1.We now have the second biggest defence budget in the world. This dodgy figure is cooked up by looking at military spending in nominal terms rather than adjusting for purchasing power parity (PPP). If you spend 1 million it will obviously go further in China than Britain – which is why analysts routinely use PPP adjustments for international comparisons. Brown takes the raw data from the Stockholm Peace Institute (find it here, pdf). Unadjusted for PPP (ie, the dodgy raw data Brown uses) than America is first ($547bn) then Britain ($59.7bn), China ($58.3bn), France ($53.6bn) and Japan ($43.6bn). But adjust for PPP and the real figure has Britain fifth. And by the way, Brown inserted as a share of GDP afterwards. Hed forgotten his own scam. If you take it as a share of GDP then Britain at 2.6% is fifth behind the India (2.7%), Russia (3.6%), the US (4.0%) and the Saudis (8.5%).

We’re number 24…

Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Vet Sticks Hand Down Shark’s Throat

EXTREME James Herriot:

An Australian vet has saved the life of a shark by sticking his arm down its throat.

The three metre (9.8 feet) shark had had a steel and aluminium gaffe hook stuck in its stomach for two weeks.


Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (8) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Margaret Curran’s Desert Rat Ratted

THE DEVIL’S Kitchen looks at some desperate New Labour campaigning:

This picture is taken from Labour’s election propaganda (see also here). The by-election candidate Margaret Curran says

Some of the people that I have met out and about over the past 9 years as a local MSP have been absolutely inspirational. Today I met a man who was up there with the very best that the East End has to offer.

The blurb:

Mr McGuiness is a 93 year old—who looks not a day past 70, by the way—living in a sheltered housing complex that I went to visit today.

Mr McGuiness fought with the Desert Rats in World War II and was treated in hospital for shrapnel wounds. He also fought in Yugoslavia with the partisans against the German occupation.

He reminded me of all the sacrifices our older generation made so that we can enjoy freedom today. I hope every single voter in the East End uses their hard-fought right to vote on July 24th.

Having met Mr McGuiness today, I am reminded we owe it to people like him to use our democratic right to vote.

Says DK:

Mr McGuinness looks in good shape for 93. He looks more like 67. With good reason, he is 67. He was 4 years old when the war ended. The picture above is of the Labour activist John McGuinness who nominated Margaret Curran on her ballot papers. A lifelong Labour activist whom Downing Street got an MBE as a reward.

Bloody hell…

Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Christian Registrar Who Refused Gay Marriage Had Child Out Of Wedlock

LILLIAN Ladele will not preside ove gay marriages. Why? Because she is a righteous Christian and adheres to the world of The Bible:

A civil registrar who claimed her Christian belief is so fundamental that she cannot conduct civil partnerships is an unmarried single mother.

During an employment tribunal Lillian Ladele, 47, who was born and raised in Nigeria, claimed that she was discriminated against by Islington Council on the grounds of her religious belief.

She told the Mail that she gave birth to an illegitimate son when she was 20.

“I would never claim to be perfect,” she said.

The revelation has led to accusations that she was not properly cross-examined at the tribunal about the nature of her religious faith – details of her extra-marital sexual activities only came to light at the weekend.

The tribunal’s judgement read:

“Ms Ladele is a Christian. Her unchallenged evidence was that she holds the orthodox Christian view that marriage is the union of one man and one woman for life to the exclusion of all others and that marriage is the God-ordained place for sexual relations.

“She could not reconcile her faith with taking an active part in enabling same-sex unions to be formed.

“She told us that she believed this to be contrary to God’s instructions that sexual relations belong exclusively between a man and a woman within marriage.”

Ms Ladele told the Mail that while working as a registrar in Islington she told her superiors:

“I would not be able to conduct civil partnerships because it states in the Bible that marriage occurs between a man and a woman, not people of the same sex, and, as a Christian, I try to follow what the Bible teaches.

“I’m not homophobic. I’ve never had a problem with gay people or their lifestyle.

“My issue was purely that I did not want to be the one to facilitate same-sex civil partnerships because I do not agree with them.”

Stonewall’s Ben Summerskill tells

“We will seek to intervene formally in any appeal process if the opportunity arises,” chief executive

“In the light of the revelations over the weekend that Miss Ladele has in fact had a child out of wedlock it does seem that the tribunal should have tested the exact nature of her claimed religious beliefs rather harder.

“It remains difficult to escape the conclusion that the principal motivation in this case for Ms Ladele, and for the Christian Institute who funded her, was prejudice against gay people and not a strongly-held religious position at all.”


Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Noam Schreiber On The Humourless Obama

NOAM Scheiber writs in The Stump on the fear of upsetting Obama:

While the comedy industry may be hurting, I think it’s potentially a bigger issue for Obama himself… People tend to vote for a presidential candidate they feel personally comfortable with. If people aren’t comfortable with humour about Obama–if they’re reluctant to laugh at him for fear of being thought racist, or of crossing some line of political correctness–then some of them probably aren’t comfortable with him, period.

Is he as relaxed as he makes out he is?

Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Robert Fisk On Child Murderer Sumir Kuntar

ROBERT Fisk watches Sumior Kuntar met by Hizbollah:

That could not be said for Samir Kuntar – 28 years in an Israeli jail for the 1979 murder of an Israeli, his young daughter and a policeman. He arrived from Israel very much alive, clean shaven but sporting a neat moustache, overawed by the hundreds of Hizbollah supporters, a man used to solitary confinement who suddenly found himself idolised by a people he had not seen in almost three decades. His eyes moved around him, the eyes of a prisoner watching for trouble. He was Israel’s longest-held Lebanese prisoner; Hizbollah’s leader, Sayed Hassan Nasrallah, had promised his release. And he had kept his word.


Her;s what the mother of the child he murdered has to say:

“It had been a peaceful Sabbath day. My husband Danny and I had picnicked with our little girls, Einat, 4, and Yael, 2, on the beach not far from our home in Naharyia, a city on the northern coast of Israel. Around midnight, we were asleep in our apartment when four terrorists from Lebanon landed in a rubber boat on the beach two blocks away.

“Gunfire and exploding grenades awakened us. Desperately we sought to hide. Danny helped our neighbour climb into a crawl space above our bedroom. I went in behind her with Yael in my arms. Then Danny grabbed Einat and was dashing out of the front door when the terrorists came crashing in. They held Danny and Einat while they searched for me and Yael.

“I will never forget the joy and the hatred in their voices as they swaggered about hunting for us, firing their guns and throwing grenades. I knew that if Yael cried out, the terrorists would toss a grenade into the crawl space, so I kept my hand over her mouth. As I lay there, I remembered my mother telling me how she had hidden from the Nazis during the Holocaust.

“The terrorists took Danny and Einat down to the beach. There, one of them shot Danny in front of Einat so that his death would be the last sight she would ever see. Then he smashed my little girl’s skull in against a rocket with his rifle butt. That terrorist was Samir Kuntar. By the time we were rescued from the crawl space hours later, Yael, too, was dead. In trying to save all our lives I had smothered her”

Says Fisk:

…Amal militia and Palestinian bodies arrived from Israel – were soon bathed in the Lebanese flag and golden Hizbollah banners, drawn by a flower-encrusted truck towards Beirut.

Let’s hear it for the child killers…

Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (7) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Shaun Bailey On The Ego Of Knife Crime

CONSERVATIVE candidate Shaun Bailey on knife-crime:

I know what it’s like to come from a poor background, growing up in a tough area, north Kensington. But it’s no excuse. Much has been made of the link between poverty and crime: it’s often used as an excuse for seriously anti-social behaviour. But few of these stabbings are motivated by robbery. They are much more about bullying and simply inflicting injuries upon others to exert power.

Another commonly held belief is that young people who get involved in knife crime have low self-esteem. I’ve been a youth worker for more than 19 years and I’ve found that many of those involved in these types of crimes actually have a very high opinion of themselves – this is part of what allows them to justify their actions to themselves.

They mug and stab and bully because they think they are better than you…

Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

David Vance On Child Murderer Samir Kuntar

ISRAEL swaps live nutters for two bodies.

WE ARE ALL HEZBOLLAH? Well then, if Hezbollah were hoping to milk the release of their heroic child-killer Samir Kuntar, the BBC sure has obliged. Did you see their stomach-churning coverage of the “militant” Kuntar’s return? The bit that really irked me was the BBC’s statement that “Kantar had been in jail since 1979 for the deadly guerrilla raid in which he killed the child, her father and a policeman.” It was not a guerrilla raid. It was an act of mass murder, in which this fiend smashed the head of 4 year-old Einat Haran on beach rocks and crushed her skull with the butt of his rifle.

What would the UK do if it were in Israel’s position?

Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Taking Offence At The New Yorker Obama Cartoon

THE New Yorker cartoon on Barack Obama – the one that only extremist Muslims would get angry about – causes cartoonists to comment:

STEVE Bell on that Barack Obama cartoon:

Irony is a difficult beast to control. Your intention as a cartoonist may be perfectly clear to you, but how some psycho in Toadsuck, Nebraska, is going to read your cartoon is anyone’s guess, and the psycho’s privilege, and you can never second guess a psycho, as was demonstrated in the Coen brothers’ film No Country for Old Men. Psychos tend to take things very literally and often carry around captive bolts powered by large canisters of compressed air, especially in the US.

So should we tread warily, lest we are misunderstood? Of course we should. Cartoonists are some of the most painstaking, careful, shy and sensitive people on earth, yet we do play with fire, toying with other people’s (and of course our own) most deeply held beliefs and most cherished illusions. Is it possible to go too far? Of course it is? Should we go too far? Of course we should. That’s what makes our job so interesting. There’s no better feeling than, having taken a risk in a drawing, seeing the thing in print and knowing it works. The converse is also true, which is why I work in a bunker on the south coast.


It succeeds in drawing international attention to the magazine. It succeeds in causing heated public debate with passionate arguments on both (or more) sides . Most interestingly though it succeeds in prompting a response from the Obama campaign team, which above anything else shows that they are genuinely concerned about the smears against him.

And Martin Rowson:

If I say you’ve said or drawn something offensive about me, it means that whatever you’ve produced is so beyond the boundaries of acceptable public discourse that you should never have done or said it in the first place. In other words, you must shut up and slink away in shame. I, therefore, win the argument, and that’s an end to it.

Touchiness is the modern malady…

Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Australian Police Rescue Doll From Burning Building


FRANTIC police smashed a window to rescue a seemingly unconscious baby from a locked vehicle in Queensland last week only to find it was an extremely lifelike doll.


Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

9/11: Asbestos Saves Lives

ASBESTOS saves lives, apparently…

Posted: 17th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The Climate Change Chocolate Bar

GUILTY pleasures:

Our Climate Change Chocolate bar is meant to educate while tasting great. It comes in a wrapper with 15 tips for lightening your environmental impact.


Posted: 16th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Colombian Hostage Rescuers Accused Of War Crimes

NOT fair:

BOGOTA, Colombia (CNN) — Colombian military intelligence used the Red Cross emblem in a rescue operation in which leftist guerrillas were duped into handing over 15 hostages, according to unpublished photographs and video viewed by CNN.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 16th, July 2008 | In: News | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The Olympic Games Village People’s Local Court

THE Olympic Games Village People’s Local Court, the only law facility bearing the Olympic title in the country, has opened in Beijing.

Located in the Olympic Village in the city’s northeast, the building is named in accordance with the Supreme People’s Court’s rule that courts should be named for their location.

During the Games, about 70 percent of cases related to the Olympics will be heard in the building, which is the seventh commissary court of Chaoyang District People’s Court. The district is home to most of the Games’ venues.

The new court will mainly hear civil cases, such as those for house rental, labor disputes and personal injury. Also handled here are cases for foreigners’ personal injury, property damage and labor dispute caused by activities of the Games, tourism, accommodations, shopping, transport, dining and entertainment, said Qian Yixin, the court’s chief judge…

Covering a judicial area of 57.22 square km, the court’s territory includes the Bird’s Nest, the Water Cube, the Olympic Green, the Olympic Village and many hotels, among others.

Most of the Olympic-related civil cases would be heard here, including many related to foreign affairs. To better help the procedures, all guides and signs are in both Chinese and English, Qian said.

Calling Mr D Chambers, calling Mr Chambers (he’s innocent, of course)…

Posted: 16th, July 2008 | In: News | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0