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29th, September In Pictures

News In Photos: September 29 2014

Today in 10 photos... More »

29th, September Sports

Ryder Cup Mistaken For British Jihadist Training Camp

TO Holywood, where the owner of a house hosting a Ryder Cup Party hears a knock at the door. He tells the BBC... More »

29th, September Arsenal

Transfer Balls: French Striker's Agent Namechecks Arsenal And Liverpool

An agent speaks... More »

29th, September Chelsea

Chelsea Balls: Mourinho Is A 'Liar' To Keep Costa Out Of Spain

CHELSEA Balls in The Daily Express, which says "Diego Costa in Chelsea training... despite Jose Mourinho saying he can't!".. More »

29th, September Fashion

Woman Sells Tacky Homemade Christmas Sweaters Like She's Being Held Hostage

They made me wear it... More »

29th, September Celebrities

Donald Trump Falls Foul of Fred West Prank (Photo)

So what is he up to now? Well, today, he tweeted a nice photograph of murderers Fred and Rose West, because he'll unthinkingly do things without a clue as to whether or not they're dodgy or not... More »

29th, September Sports 1

Ched Evans Should Be Able To Work Wherever He Can Find It

CHED Evans is a convicted rapist. He's also a former Sheffield United and Wales footballer. Next week, he's scheduled to leave prison... More »

29th, September News

Alton Nolen: Mark Vaughan Brought A Gun To A Knife Fight

GUNS in America: Vaughan Foods Chief Operating Officer Mark Vaughan, a reserve sheriff's deputy, had a handgun about his person when Alton Nolen beheaded Vaughan employee Colleen Hufford... More »

29th, September News

CCTV Operator Convicted Of Voyeurism (Doesn't Get Promoted)

THIS is just great. A CCTV operator has been convicted of voyeurism... More »

29th, September manchester united

Manchester United Balls: Wayne Rooney Blames Defenders And His Independent Leg For Red Card

More »

29th, September Sports

'Bigamous' Newcastle United Player Cheick Tiote Plays Three Back Home

NEWCASTLE United midfileder Cheick Tiote "has two wives ...and a mistress", says the Sun... More »

29th, September News

Islamic State Awaits The Ataturk Revolution

Ban the bottle and get the bigots... More »

28th, September Celebrities

Brigitte Bardot: A Life In Photos

Bardot - the photos.... More »

28th, September Celebrities

George Clooney Got Married: The Wedding Photos

GEORGE Clooney got married to his human rights lawyer fiancé Amal Alamuddin in Venice, Italy... More »

28th, September Celebrities 2

Local News Watch: The Torquay Herald Express Clarifies Sir Roger Moore's Scotch Egg Shun Scoop

James Bond 'shuns' Scotch egg... More »

28th, September News

Samantha Lewthwaite Opens Ginger Suicide School In Syria

THE Mirror reports that "White Widow Samantha Lewthwaite" is "training ISIS female suicide bombers in Syria".... More »

28th, September Politicians

Tory No-Sex Sex Scandal: Brooks Newmark Says You CAN Pull In Paisley Pyjamas

NEWS of a Tory "sex scandal" whets the appetites... More »

28th, September Liverpool

Raheem Sterling: Liverpool Will Lose The Player They 'Mined' At QPR

THE Sun has an "EXCLUSIVE" to quicken the hearts of Liverpool FC Fans: "LIVERPOOL are finally ready to open contract talks with Raheem Sterling..." More »

28th, September Celebrities

Jasmine Tredevil: 'I Pay For Sex With Cheeseburgers'

JASMINE Tridevil is the women with a foam pillow trapped between her pneumatic breasts. But to the Sun she continues to be the "3-boob model". And today we read that she "made me live in cage as sex slave"... More »

27th, September Newcastle United 1

Newcastle United Owner Wants To 'Murder' Alan Pardew: Gallowgate Jihadis Rejoice

VIVEK Chaudhary has news to gladden the hearts of Newscastle United fans. Writing in the Independent, Chaudhary broadcasts what Newcastle United owner Mike Ashley said about his side's manager, the man who looks like a surveryor on his way to a two-course lunch, Alan Pardew... More »

27th, September Sports

Swansea City's Jonjo Shelvey Becomes A Young Letter Writer's Hero

HARRY Jacobs, 8, wanted Swansea City’s Jonjo Shelvey to visit his North London school. His mum Nic wrote a letter to the player. Harry wanted to meet the former Liveprool and Charlton midfielder because, like him, he has Alopecia Totallis... More »

27th, September News

Fat Men Last Longest In Bed And Almost Finish Last

BIG bellied men make the ebst lovers. Of course they do. Who wants to schtup a lump of gristle?... More »

26th, September Books 1

What There Is Before There Is Anything There: A Scary Story

It's the same every night when the lights go out... More »

26th, September Liverpool

Liverpool Balls: Brendan Rodgers Admits Suarez Was the 'Core' Of The Team

WHY are Liverpool doing not all that well in the Premier League? Brendan Rodgers, the Reds' verbose mangaer, knows... More »

26th, September Arsenal 1

Arsenal Balls: You'll Never Guess Who Was The Real Star Of The Invincibles

More »