Anorak - Pop culture, media, sport and weirdness

18th, September News

Local News Watch: The Most Hampstead Story Of All Time

THIS might be the most Hampstead story of all time. It's grim up North London, as the Ham & High reports... More »

18th, September Arsenal

Chelsea Balls: Is Badge-Kissing Cesc Fabregas The Most Fickle Man In Football?

GOOD old Cesc Fabregas. He's the Spanish footballer with Barcelona “DNA”, Arsenal in his heart and Barcelona in his blood... More »

17th, September Arsenal 1

Transfer Balls: Arsenal Sign Swansea's Wilfried Bony For Less Than Spurs And Liverpool Bought Him For

TRANSFER Balls: The Daily Express reveals that Liverpool, Arsenal and Tottenham are in for "£19m target Wilfried Bony". The headline ends a little esoterically: "CONFIRMS interest"... More »

17th, September manchester united

Transfer Balls: 'PSG Goalkeeper' Invites Manchester United Fans To Plunder Paris

TRANSFER Balls: The Daily Express continues to be rich source for utter drivel presented as rumour-based fact... More »

17th, September Technology

Apple's New Leukaemia Mystery

A NEW allegation about those massive factories in China that make all of Apple's iKit... More »

17th, September In Pictures

Makeup Artist Uses Her mouth To Create Your Favourite Face-Painted Cartoon Characters

Face-painting jut got better... More »

17th, September Sports

Manchester United's Eamon Dunphy & Leeds United's John Giles Star In Weird Dairy Milk Advert (With Apologies To Arsenal's Lim Brady)

JOHNNY Giles, memorably of Leeds United, and former Manchester United player Eamon Dunphy are now TV pundits in Ireland. The duo have been working for Cadbury's Dairy Milk, extolloing the benefits of a diet of sugar and fat in a budding sportsman's diet... More »

17th, September Celebrities

How To Erase U2 From Your Apple Cassette Player

THERE'S been much chatter about Apple's move to give away U2's new album Songs of Innocence to 500 million iTunes customers in 119 countries to coincide with its iPhone 6 and Watch launch... More »

17th, September manchester united

Manchester United: Wayne Rooney Wants To Emulate Real Madrid's Raul

More »

17th, September News

Pulling Secrets Of The Surrey Bus Driver with 26 Children

WHO is Britain's most fertile dad? The Sun reveals him to be Michael Redman, 59. He's squired 26 children by nine different women... More »

16th, September Film

The Best Worst Last Films by Legendary Actors

DEATH is a terrible inevitability. You could pop your considerable clogs at any given moment. You might be half way through a banana. You could be mid-poo, like Elvis. You could be *this close* to finishing that computer game that proved so difficult all those years. You might suddenly die just before someone finishes a joke... More »

16th, September Arsenal

Arsenal Balls: 'Danny Welbeck's Feet Are In The Wrong Place'

ARSENAL were out-thought, outfought and outplayed in Borussia Dortmund. They were also out-scored, losing 2-0... More »

16th, September News

The Daily Express On The Illegal Immigrant Who Hid In A Hiding Place

THE DAILY Express has a delicious headline about its favouite bugbear: immigrants. News is that an "illegal immigrant" was found hiding "UNDER: a family's camper van... More »

16th, September News

Daily Mail Fail: Lovely Typo In Story Blaming Liberals For Ruining Education

THE Daily Mail is outraged at the standards of education. It blames "liberal education dogma" for the lowering of education standards.. More »

16th, September News

Call Keith: TSA Orders Man To Undergo Extra Groping After He Lands

WHEN Minnesota's Kahler Nygard headed to Denver he was flagged as a person of interest. At Denver Airport, the airline Spirit, the TSA and above all KEITH decided he hadn't been searched properly. The Keithians wanted to analyse Kahler after he'd flown. They wanted an extra feel... More »

16th, September Fashion

Urban Outfitters Sells Kent State University Dead Student Fashions

That shirt is to die for...and in... More »

16th, September Celebrities

Kanye West Commands The Disabled To Dance To His Songs

KANYE West began his move into TV evangelism by commanding an audience to 'Stand up'... More »

16th, September manchester united

Manchester United Balls: Rio Ferdinand Lends Ronaldo His Hotpants

IT'S Day three of the Sun's serialisation of former Manchester United player Rio Ferdinand's autoibiography. Having dealt with the John Terry racism debarcle and David Moye's disgust at low-fat chips, Rio turns to "banter"... More »

16th, September News 7

Border Incidentals: The SNP Is A Spent Force As The Home Counties Get Ready To Pay

THE coming political furore of the Scottish question is not yet fully realised by Britain's Home Counties... More »

16th, September Celebrities 1

Release The Lawyers And The Offended: Danièle Watts Has Been Handcuffed

Says Watts: “I remembered the countless times my father came home frustrated or humiliated by the cops when he had done nothing wrong. I felt his shame, his anger, and my own feelings of frustration for existing in a world where I have allowed myself to believe that “authority figures” could control my BEING… my ability to BE!!!!!!!” More »

16th, September Key Posts

Before They Were Famous: The Music of Pop and Rock

IN September 1994, a reel-to-reel tape emerged and was put up for auction. Sotheby's were all over it because this wasn't any old recording they had on their hands... More »

16th, September Film

The Truth About Stanley Kubrick's 2001: A Space Odyssey Letter

YOU'LL have seen the sweary letter signed 'Stanley Kubrick' written to the head of AGM about the sequel to 2001: A Space Odyssey.... More »

16th, September manchester united

Transfer Balls: Cristiano Ronaldo Finds £500,000 Reasons To Love Manchester United

Transfer Balls: Criatiano Ronaldo Finds £500,000 Reasons To Love Manchester United... More »

16th, September Chelsea

Chelsea Balls: Welcome To the Stamford Bridge Job Centre Cristian Manea

THE Sun says Chelsea are looking to sign 17-year-old Romanian Cristian Manea for £2.3million. He's a good player who will surely go on to have a professional career at some level... More »

15th, September News

Kyron Horman: Justice Dies As Terri Horman Is 'Killed'

KYRON Horman has made it into the pages of the National Enquirer. In a article entitled "TAKEN! KIDNAP EPIDEMIC ROCKS AMERICA", readers are told "Kyron Hormon gone from school"... More »