Politicans and world leaders making news and in the news, and spouting hot air
Barack Obama is beyond parody: the US President is making sacrifices for the planet:
President Barack Obama announced in his weekly address that he will travel to the Florida Everglades on Wednesday, which is Earth Day, to bring attention to the dangers of climate change.
If one man on a huge 747 Jumbo Jet (plus bodyguards, support craft, a massive limo, Press pack and guns – lots of guns) can save the planet imagine what you can do?
It’s only an “occassional use of private avitaion fuel“…
Ed Miliband Watch: Is the Labour Party leader a vote winner or a vote loser? The Daily Mirror seems to have answered that question. This week, Miliband has been noticeable by his abscence for the Labour Party-supporting newpaper.
Monday: Ed is on the front page. He is all over pages 4 and 5. He is there again on Page 7.
Tuesday: Mirror readers get two big photos of Tory leader David Cameron. Miliband is now only on Page 6 (left-hand page).
Wednesay: No Miliband. But there is a big photo of Samantha Cameron.
Thursday: Cameron on the cover and all over Page 5. Ed Miliband photos there are none.
Friday: Cameron is on the cover once again. But Ed is back. Well, his back in on Page 4 (see photo above).
That’s one front page for Ed and two for Dave in the Mirror.
PS: This week Miliband’s been on the front-page of the Tory-supporting Sun three times.
Verdict: The tabloids think Ed Miliband is a vote loser for Labour.
So. Tristram Hunt, the shadow education secretary, was getting down with the cool kids at Howitt Primary School at Heanor, Derbyshire. He asked a year six pupil (age 10 or 11) who he’d vote for in a General Election. Well, you have to be 18 to vote. But the the lad played along, replying that he’d vote UKIP.
Hunt said that’s “very good”. But why UKIP? The lad answers:
“To get all the foreigners out”.
That’s pretty good English for a Romanian…
Poli-Pix: a look at how the Party leaders are portrayed in the day’s national tabloids.
Once again the Daily Mirror features not a single photograph of Labour Party leader Ed Miliband. For a photo of Ed, you need to turn to the Tory-supporting Sun, where he occupies the front page. Today Ed is dressed as a member of the Bullingdon Club.
Can it be that the papers both agree that Miliband is a vote loser for the Labour Party?
The Mirror opts to lead with David Cameron.
Cameron is also inside the Mirror. He is “Bodge The Builder”. And like Bob The Builder, Cameron does look remarkably smooth and 2D.
Poli-Pix: a daily look at biased tabloid photos of the leading politicians.
The Daily Mirror has not a single photograph of Ed Miliband. Not one. You know your man is a vote loser when he’s kept hidden. The Labour supporting newspaper does, however, have this shot of UKIP leader Nigel Farage.
Lookalike of the day features SNP leader Nicola Sturgeon (right) and TV and panto star ‘Little’ Jimmy Krankie (left).
Spotter: Brendan O’Neill
Poli-pix: a daily look at how the big politcal party leaders are presented in the tabloids. Biased much? You betcha!
The Sun continues its theme of mocking up Labour Leader Ed Miliband. Today he’s a character from The Simpsons. But which one? The headline ‘D’oh’ suggests Homer Simpson, it being his catchphrase – but people like the tender-hearted buffoon so the Sun goes with a yellowy Miliband-type.
The Sun also says Ed Miliband is a ‘rose’ red colour. Make you mind up, Sunsters: yellow or red? Vote now!
Conservative Party leader David Camneron does much better. He’s in the pink. He’s gazing up at a rosy-fingered dawn. Maggie Thatcher is by his ear. What can she be saying? “Everyone can buy their own home, Dave?” says Maggie. “You can buy Number 10 if you really go for it and help big business. Google’s loaded!”
In the Mirror David Cameron is upsetting children. The stranger taking pictures of your kids is fine, though. He is fine. Checks have been made. Haven’t they?
Ed Milibad is Alan Sugar. He’s got The Apprentice star’s pointy finger. ‘You’re Fired!” says Ed. No. That can’t be right. That zero-hours contract is water tight…
UKIP leader Nigel Farage is laughing. Ha-ha-Ho-ho. He-he.
Ed Miliband is caught saying ‘sexy Sue’s six sizzling sausages’.
Ed Miliband is doing strange things with his mouth. ‘Oi! Quentin Letts… Fffffff*** off!”
Nigel Farage is laughing. Ho-ho. He-he. Ha-ha.
More biased photos of the leaders in tomorrows papers…
Hillary Clinton’s 4040 Page looks like this.
The rest of the site, well, it’s pretty much downhill from there…
To Turkey, where Mayor Melih Gökçek of Ankara is being sued by the Turkish Union of Engineers and Architects’ Chambers for investing tax money on a wonderful 20-foot tall robot statue. The statue is not a 3D version of a self-portrait. It’s to advertise a new theme park.
Said Gökçek in reply to the many critics who have slammed his project: “Respect the robot.”
Spotter: The Independent,
Poli Pix: A look at how the tabloids portray our political masters.
Today the Mirror leads with a photograpah of Labour Party leader Ed Miliband looking even-toned, pert-haired, groomed and steady.
Inside and the Mirror has a phot of his arch enemy, Tory moneyman George Osborne, the plotting, sinister Tory is looking down as if into his own grave, or yours.
The Daily Star has only one poli-pix photo, and it’s of UKIP leader Nigel Farage beaming and grinning and joking and laughing. Ha-ha. Waddaguy!
The Sun counters the Mirror’s images of trusty Ed Miliband with one of him looking flat-haired and gloomy. His eyes look up but only to hear the damning verdict from the judge: send the man down:
Inside and it’s no better for Ed, who appears to be a tad lopsided:
The Sun also has a photo of Osborne, who now, having kicked the Daily Mirror’s puppy to death, has rediscovered his love of life:
Poli Pics is Anorak’s new look at the pictures of politicians we see in the newspapers. These pictures are an easy way for news organs to show which side of the debte they’re on. Selecting the right images to show your chosen leader looking good and their rival looking like a fool is the aim.
In today’s Sun, Katie Hopkins’ column was illustrated by pictures of Labour Party leader Ed Miliband and SNP leader Nicola Sturgeon.
This is Miliband doing his impression of Prince Charles seeing Camilla on the toilet:
And Nicola Sturgeon was last seen trying to murder Harry Potter (gets my vote – ed):
So much for the Sun’s bias. But what of the Daily Mirror? Well, the Labour Party-supporting paper show Miliband moving the country half a yard forward as UKIP leader Nigel Farage is lost for words and David Cameron tries to work out what one plus one equals.
And then there is the extempore eating. In the Mirror, Cameron is jamming a fork into his gums.
To Cameron’s side is Sam Cam, his loving wife. She reminds us of someone.
Didn’t she used to be Janice from The Muppet Show’s Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem?
More Poli Pics when we see them…
Once upon a time, Labour Party leader Ed Miliband liked the Sun. It was his newspaper of choice.
Ed Miliband was in ‘Sun Country’. And he liked it:
He read it wherever he went.
And then Ed Miliband realised that the Sun was not exactly on his side. He could try and try but the Sun wasn’t going to be won over. Indeed, the Sun started to mock him.
So. How did the tabloids respond to the arrival of’ Tony Blair on the Labour Party’s election bandwagon?
You’d think the Mirror would hail the arrival of the Labour Party’s most successful leader (at least in term’s of winning elections). But you need to wait until page 9 for any sign of grinning Tone.
In his ‘The Heckler’ column, Tim Walker mentions Tony Blair’s “crow’s feet” – “Quite how sensitive Blair is about the lines around his eyes is clear from newly-released correspondence between his flunkies and the Naitional Portrait Gallery over their official study of him”.
Tony wanted less lines. The artist complied.
And that’s it.
SO. Who won the Leaders Debate on ITV?
Helping you with the facts are the newspapers:
The Sun: Ed Miliband loses his deposit (fnar) in masturbation pun frenzy:
The Mirror: Ed wins! Cameron loses! Nigel Farage is blown away!
I am worried about The Queen. She appears to be out canvassing for UKIP.
Come the revolution…
The Sun’s to-deadline harridan Katie Hopkins invites Labour Party leader Ed Miliband to stick his wife Justine in the oven and gas her.
Add in the fact that Ed Miliband is a Jew and you have a little problem with Katie Hopkins’ call to murder…
Anorak Towers marked the televised leadership debate in much the same way we do the Super Bowl: we went out. What did the tabloids do? Did they feature the big showdown between Labour Party leader ‘Red’ Ed Miliband and Tory Prime Minister ‘Blue’ Dave Cameron? And why was Cameron sat by a skip?
Politics fans need to wait until page 6 for any news of the Channel 4 and Sky show. Over half a page, readers learn that Cameron says he’s “not Chairman Mao”, the dead Chinese leader. Cameron wasn’t refetting to his hairstyle or suit, rather his resolve not to go on and on and on as the country’s political supremo.
As for Miliband, all Sun readers learn is that he won the coin toss and chose to go second. Also, he “flew in a US PR guru to help him”.
Page 10: The Sun’s editorial says Ed Balls is “only the oil rag” to an” economic train crash” powered by “engine drive” Gordon Brown.
Ed Balls was not on the debate.
The review covers pages 6 and 7. Readers see three photos of “chicken” Cameron, one with his eyes closed. We learn that he is “clueless on food banks”. His chat with Jeremy Paxman was “humiliating”. He is a “lame duck”. It’s not until paragraph 11 that Ed Miliband appears. The Mirror only has one photo of him – and it’s an odd one of him pointing as if ordering the restaurant bill.
The Mirror mentions ‘Cameron’ by name 7 times; and ‘Ed’ just 4 times.
Page 8: David Cameron is “pitiful” and a “faintheart”. Ed gets no adjectives. He’s just ‘Ed’.
Wait for it… wait… News appears on Page 12 and 13.
We learn that Ed Miliband “came under pressure” on immigration.
The Mail cites a Guardian poll, saying 54% of people who respond to polls think he won the night.
Quentin Lett’s says Cameron “soaked up Paxman’s aggro, narrowed his eyes.. and refused to respond in kind. Miliband flared right back at the monster…”
But was it really that interesting?
Page 9: The news is all about immigration. There is one picture of Cameron. There is not a single photo of Miliband.
Number of mentions of ‘Cameron’ by name: 6
Number of mentions of Miliband by name: 1
The only front-page story on the debate. And the story is that “Paxo has stuffed Ed and Cam”. They both lost.
Page 2: It was a “snore draw”.
It was “drab”.
Verdict: the Daily Star nails it.
Note: The Guardian manages to conjure 11 stories from the debate. Does anyone read them?
Westminster paedophiles: a look at reporting on the story that children were abused and killed by above-the-law VIPs in the 1970s and 1980s.
Only the Daily Mail leads with the story on its front page. Readers hear news of “Another Cyril Smith Cover-Up”.
Smith is the former Labour and Liberal politican who died a knight of the realm but is now billed as a serial child abuser. Recent news is that he was twice arrested for alleged crimes against boys. He escaped prosecution because, as one retired copper says, police buried the files.
Westminster paedophiles: Cyril Smith, Sidney Cooke and official secrets in Coronation Buildings, Lambeth
Westmingter paedophiles: a daily look at allegations of a VIP sex ring cover-up.
Dead Liberal MP Cyril Smith did not only paddle boy’s bottoms. In the 1980s, he was arrested in London as part of an investigation into alleged sex parties with teenage males. It is further alleged the arrest was kept secret by police, who abused the Official Secrets Act to protect the alleged pervert.
The story was broken by BBC’s Newsnight. That’s the same TV show that spiked the story that Jimmy Savile – a knight of realm, like Smith – was a paedophile on BBC time.
Retired Lancashire detective Jack Tasker told Sky News:
“Other people were rather worried that if Cyril Smith went before a court, he would open his mouth.”
Don Hale was working for the Bury Messenger at the time. In 2014, he said Barbara Castle, the veteran Labour politician for Blackburn, Lancashire, handed him a dossier of VIP paedophiles. She has since died.
Hale told BBC Radio 5 live’s Nicky Campbell:
“In 1984, I started making enquiries to get a response from various MPs I’d spoken to a number of Liberal MPs named in the document. Cyril Smith came into to see me. He came storming in, said it was all rubbish, demanded that I hand everything over to him straight away and he was really aggressive. I mean he was quite a big guy anyway. He was about six foot tall and quite heavy and he was really poking his fingers at me, threatening, spitting at me, all sorts of things. He was a real horror. In the end I refused to give it. He walked out of the office, stormed out the office. And the very next day Special Branch arrived with three plain clothes officers and about a dozen police, you know, raided the place, pushed me against the wall, were very, very aggressive again, threatened to arrest me on the spot for perverting the course of justice if I didn’t hand over the documents to them. I agreed obviously to do that, showed them what the documents were and they took them and then disappeared.”
Are they still around?
Will more police talk?
… the threat of prosecution under the Official Secrets Act would have made the officers concerned fear for their careers.
In 2010GMP Assistant Chief Constable Steve Heywood said:
“This has been a very complex inquiry and I hope people understand why it has taken some time before we were in a position to comment publicly.
“It was very important that both ourselves and Lancashire Police examined all our records very carefully so we could be certain what involvement we had in investigating allegations of sexual and physical abuse made against such a high-profile figure as Smith.
“We are now in a position to say that on three separate occasions, files were passed to first the DPP and then the CPS containing details of abuse committed by Smith, but on each occasion no prosecution was pursued.
“Having now reviewed those decisions, we believe that if the same evidence was presented to the CPS today there would have been a very realistic prospect that Smith would have been charged with a number of indecent assaults, and that the case would have been brought to trial.
“Clearly that is a bold statement to make but it is absolutely important for those victims who were abused by Smith that we publicly acknowledge the suffering they endured.
“Although, Smith cannot be charged or convicted posthumously, from the overwhelming evidence we have it is right and proper we should publicly recognise that young boys were sexually and physically abused and we will offer them as much support as they need should they wish to speak to us.”
A former detective who worked on the original investigation into Cooke told the Sunday Mirror that the minister was among those alleged to have been photographed in a 1986 police surveillance on premises where boys had been dropped off. Others allegedly included Jimmy Savile, MP Cyril Smith and top judges – though none of them were ever arrested.
This week the English language welcomed the phrase “overfirm denials”.
Conservative Party chairman Michael Green, who has been working under the unlikely pseudonym ‘Grant Shapps’ (or vice versa), admits that he did hawk money-making schemes while working as a serving MP, something he had previously denied.
But it’s the phrase – over-firm denial – that sticks. It is a form of leptologia, an argument by quibbling. Harsh critics would argue that the rhetorical term for this denial is “lying”. But that would be utterly wrong.
Michael Green was unavailable for comment.
The bansturbators have a new target: your vagina. Keith Vaz MP, chairman of the select committee, wants to celebrate freedom and promote feminism by controlling what a woman can do with her vagina. They want to stop women getting a cosmetically honed “designer vagina”. It is beyond parody.
“We cannot tell communities in Sierra Leone and Somalia to stop a practice which is freely permitted on Harley Street.”
The Government is against enforced Female Genital Mutilation. It is exporting its drive to Africa. Why Africans should listen to the UK Government’s Vagina Tsar is a moot point. But whereas the UK once exported the missionary position, it’s now more interested in voyeurism.
As for Vaz, well, it takes a twat to really know one…
Are you a Young Conservative? I said, “ARE YOU A YOUNG CONSERVATIVE?”
Still the greatest ever TV caption.
UKIP leader Nigel Farage has been talking about immigrants, migrants and jobs. The Guardian leads with Farage’s views on Muslims in the UK who could form “a fifth column and kill us”.
The Independent also leds with Farage. It picks up on his views that laws banning discrimination on grounds of nationality or race are put of date.
“If I talked to my children… about the question of race, they wouldn’t know what I was talking about,” he was reported to say.
Farage has four children: Samuel (born 1989), Thomas (born 1991), Victoria (born 2000) and Isabelle (born 2005). Do none of them have a clue about race? If they don’t it’s because they are enlightened rather than ignorant. Isn’t it?
Farage adds that he wants employers to be able to select staff by their nationality.
UKIP leader Nigel Farage is not only about immigration and Europe. He also has a keen interest in education. He posted a question on twitter:
Can anyone name what’s behind me in this picture?
Answers come thick and fast to the first part of #Nigelasks:
Let’s here it for the patriarchty. For it they who will save feminism. That sound ridiculous, right. But to hereditary power speaker Chelsea Clinton, it makes perfect sense.
Ashe Chow writes in the Washington Examiner:
During an interview with Fortune, Chelsea Clinton (daughter of Bill and Hillary, interviewer of computer-animated geckos) claimed that around the world men must be the ones to lead the way to gender equality.
“We’ve seen some real cultural normative shifts — and candidly it often has to be men who lead the way,” Clinton said when asked specifically about gender equality in Japan. “In countries where we’ve seen real declining rates in child marriage, of female genital mutilation, it has always been the result of a real cross-sector coalition [with men leading].”
Glenn Reynolds notes how life is imitating The Onion:
After decades spent battling gender discrimination and inequality in the workplace, the feminist movement underwent a high-level shake-up last month, when 53-year-old management consultant Peter “Buck” McGowan took over as new chief of the worldwide initiative for women’s rights…
“You can’t waste time pussyfooting around with protests and getting all emotional about a bunch of irrelevant details,” McGowan said. “If you want to enjoy equal rights, you have to have a real man-to-man chat with the people in charge until you can hammer out some more equitable custody laws.”
Bill Clinton was President of the USA. Hilary Clinton worked for a male President who told Sarah Palin her views were “like putting lipstik on a pig”. That man was Barack Obama. And he’s seen as the epitome of equal opportunies…