Politicans and world leaders making news and in the news, and spouting hot air
IS Barack Obama a dictator? No, of course he isn’t. But would he like to be one? As he said:
“I’m the president of the United States, I’m not the emperor of the United States.”
CANCER gave Venezuela a bloodless coup when it claimed the life of Hugo Chavez, the country’s President.
Sean Penn liked him:
“Today the people of the United States lost a friend it never knew it had. And poor people around the world lost a champion. I lost a friend I was blessed to have. My thoughts are with the family of President Chavez and the people of Venezuela. Venezuela and its revolution will endure under the proven leadership of Vice President Maduro.”
VENEZUELAN President Hugo Chávez has died. He had cancer. Or as Vice President Nicolas Maduro put it, he had poison, administered by “enemies of the fatherland”. He’s waiting for “scientific proof” that Mr Chávez was poisoned.
REJOICE! North Korea has new future leader for its hereditary Communist dictatorship. Kim Jong Un’s wife, Ri Sol Ju, has given birth to a baby. Yep, he is the little un.
Reports are that the child has already been seen banging his fists on table, screaming, demanding and being utterly unreasonble. Says one insider: “He has the makings of a top notch despot.”
AUSTRALIA’s carbon tax forces companies to pay a (£15; $24) levy for every tonne of greenhouse gases they produce. Julia Gillard’s government is keen to create a clean energy economy. The tax will hit airlines. But, thankfully, Gillard is here to help them, too. Her glasses are travelling at speed:
Albert Park optical stylist Sue Feldy has been inundated with phone calls after she was exposed as the woman behind Prime Minister Julia Gillard’s new glasses …
Mrs Feldy was sworn to secrecy over her role in shaping Ms Gillard’s new look, but gained official permission to speak after being contacted by a radio station.
“I think I knew it would cause a bit of a stir,” Mrs Feldy said. “We have to keep getting them in, the stockist can’t keep up!”
Mrs Feldy flew to Canberra with 100 pairs for Ms Gillard to browse.
WHAT is a person supposed to do when someone is flashing their genitals around eh? Do you politely look away, or do you shriek and point? What most of us would do is have a little peak and try and be as dignified as possible when faced with someone’s nether-regions.
And that is exactly what Serbia’s prime minister did when he was faced with a TV interview, in which the host wasn’t wearing any knickers.
WELL, you can call it a problem if you like, personally I’d call it a godsend. But there are two things which should be making the European Union federast types very nervous right now. The first is that while neither of them actually won the election the winners in terms of doing really well were Berlusconi and Beppe Grillo. One’s a comedian and the other isn’t a billionaire on trial for under-aged whoring. But between the two of them this is true:
The projected results showed more than half of Italians had voted for the anti-euro platforms of Berlusconi and Grillo.
MARGARET Thatcher’s 28-tonne ‘battle bus’ used for her Northern Ireland tour has sold for £16,940 at auction. The bus weighs 38 tons, seats 32 passengers and can survice a 7.62 bullet / handbag-encased brick.
TO South Africa, where Jonas White, mayor of Cederberg municipality, is accused of sending unseemly photographs to his deputy, Lorna Scheepers. The pick of the bunch is an alleged shot of his erect penis coasted in cream and decorated with a strawberry.
THEY’RE laughing at your, George Galloway. They’re laughing at you.
At Christ Church College’s Blue Boar lecture theatre at Oxford University, the Respect party MP tells 21-year-old student Eylon Aslan-Levy: “I don’t debate with Israelis.”
Mr Galloway had already given his speech. For ten minutes he gave his viewpoint.
GUNS in America: Joe Biden seems confused. At an event hosted by Parents Magazine,Biden was asked if banning assault guns would not just mean villains had the advantage, after all if they’re breaking the law they might have an illegal weapons. He answered:
“If you want to protect yourself, get a double barrel shotgun. You don’t need an AR-15.”
Guns are good, says Joe. But he’ll choose which ones you can use.
TO Zimbabwe, where Clemence Zikhali has been convicted of making derogatory remarks about Mugabe’s private parts.
How Ted Nugent dodged the draft: he ‘bleeds red, white, blue and liberty’ because others do the fighting
TED Nugent is neither dead nor jailed. He makes the pledge then he break the pledge. The self-styled black Jew is a big fan of the National Rifle Association. He is all for protecting hard-won American freedoms. Nugent is a board member of the NRA. The 64-year-old rocker who once told the president to “suck on my machine gun”. Nugent went along to Obama’s State of the Unions address on Tuesday evening.
In a commercial for his Discovery Channel television show, Ted Nugent’s Gun Country, the man of liberty declared:
“I bleed red, white, blue and liberty. And nothing says liberty more than the right to bear arms. Guns built this country and good men with guns made it the American dream. This is a look into the world of guns and America’s obsession with guns through the eyes of the biggest gun nut of all: me.”
WHO buys those luxury goods in China. No, not the knock off tut. The real deals. Osnos at the New Yorker spots a link:
[T]he luxury watch business enjoyed a banner year in 2011, growing forty per cent. But then China’s anti-corruption campaign began, and by September, Bo Xilai was in handcuffs, and watch exports to China suffered a devastating blow—down 27.5 per cent compared to a year earlier, according to the Federation of the Swiss Watch Industry. ChinaDaily quoted an industry consultant saying the anti-corruption drive “hurts the luxury watch business a lot.”
It’s not just watches. In 2009, the industry experts estimated that gifts to government officials made up nearly fifty per cent of all of China’s luxury sales.
Labour and LibDem peers gang up to amend the Defamation Bill: Psmith Journalist shines light on our hideous libel laws
LIBEL laws in the UK are ridiculous. They’ve been so for eons. In is work Psmith Journalist, P. G. Wodehouse has Comrade Psmith note:
In the first place, we know that there must be some one at the bottom of the business. Secondly, as there appears to be no law of libel whatsoever in this great and free country, we shall be enabled to haul up our slacks with a considerable absence of restraint…
“You may leave it to me, Comrade Windsor. I am no hardened old journalist, I fear, but I have certain qualifications for the post. A young man once called at the office of a certain newspaper, and asked for a job. ‘Have you any special line?’ asked the editor. ‘Yes,’ said the bright lad, ‘I am rather good at invective.’ ‘Any special kind of invective?’ queried the man up top. ‘No,’ replied our hero, ‘just general invective.’ Such is my own case, Comrade Windsor. I am a very fair purveyor of good, general invective… Taking full advantage of the benevolent laws of this country governing libel, I fancy I will produce a screed which will make this anonymous lessee feel as if he had inadvertently seated himself upon a tin-tack…”
MIKE Freer is Conservative member for Finchley and Golders Green. He gets it. He understands that debating gay marriage and gay rights is an ugly business. The suits debate your freedoms, what is it you are allowed to do with your life. Who gave them the right? Who put them in charge of right and wrong?
Who would chose to be gay – and some still call it a lifestyle choice – and have your life become a matter of public debate? Who would want to be set apart as a special case, something different and questionable?
Vote now for equality. The idea that you have to even vote for it is abhorrent:
CHRIS Huhne and Vicky Pryce are on the phone. The text messages with his son are over here. The Huhne family need to regroup and agree to do a reality TV show:
David Beckham, Jimmy Savile, Ronnie Irani, Maggie Thatcher and Jeffrey Archer: the five biggest charity boasters
THEY do a lot of work for charity, and they DO like to mention it!
When it comes to self-promotion you have to hand it to him. Transfer deadline day arrives and instead of talking about a 22-year-old Brazilian or Portuguese hotshot on his way to Chelsea or Manchester to City, the media is frothing with excitement over a 37-year-old former international whose main purpose these days is to sell merchandise with his name on.
CHRIS Rock has been speaking truth to power:
“It’s [the USA] ready for a retarded president, why wouldn’t it be ready for an African American president?”
JOHN Redwood can be sarcastic:
The top 1% took home 11.2% of the nation’s net income under unequal Labour in 2009-10, and a much lower 7% this year under the much more equal Coalition. This fall goes all the way down through the top half of earners. The top 50% received 75% of total net income in 2009-10, and only 60% this year. Meanwhile the bottom half receives a bigger share of the income than at any time this century.
All those who wanted a more equal society should rejoice. Indeed, they should be voting for Coalition parties out of gratitude. The Coalition has done something Labour was quite unable to do during its period in office, when the UK became less equal.
ANY idea why Ron Paul never made it to the White House? The former Congressman has made a diplomatic and weighty speech on Chris Kyle, the prolific US Navy Seal sniper who was shot dead, allegedly murdered, in Texas:
As a veteran, I certainly recognize that this weekend’s violence and killing of Chris Kyle were a tragic and sad event. My condolences and prayers go out to Mr. Kyle’s family. Unconstitutional and unnecessary wars have endless unintended consequences. A policy of non-violence, as Christ preached, would have prevented this and similar tragedies. -REP
The now ex-wife, Vicky Price, exposed her husband’s lying to get revenge for his affair.
And then there’s the son, Peter Huhne, who when aged 18, was unimpressed by dad’s relationship with Carina Trimingham. He told dad to “f*** off”.
HAS Iran run out of monkeys to fire into space? News is that President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is ready and willing to be the first Iranian to orbit the Earth in space. As he says:
“I am ready to be the first human to be sent to space by Iranian scientists. Sending living things into space is the result of Iranian efforts and the dedication of thousands of Iranian scientists.”
To say nothing of reading textbooks of what the Russians did in the 1960s.
CHRIS Huhne is a liar. He lied about a speeding fine in March 2003. He lied and he lied and he lied. So. Now the former energy secretary -a keen fan of wind power – he’s stepping down as the Liberal Democrat MP for Eastleigh:
“I have pleaded guilty today, I am unable to say more while there is an outstanding trial but having taken responsibility for something which happened 10 years ago the only proper course of action is now to resign my seat in Parliament, which I will do very shortly.”