Politicans and world leaders making news and in the news, and spouting hot air
WHEN quizzed about Britain on the David Letterman show, David Cameron was apparently unable to give the meaning of the words Magna Carta. We say “apparently” because Boris Johnson, who might of course have his own agenda here, suggested that the Prime Minister knew perfectly well what it meant, but feigned ignorance in order to give the impression that he is just a regular, down-to-earth kinda guy.
Really? Why, yes. I read it on The Onion.
WHEN Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu,showed the UN and world what the Iranian nuclear bomb would look like, we realised that armageddon might be funny:
A VOTE for Barack Obama is a vite for swearing:
THANKS to Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu of Israel, we all get to meet nuclear war with a wide grin and a titter. First one to blink, get the drinks…
Photos: Netanyahu show an illustration as he describes his concerns over Iran’s nuclear ambitions during his address to the 67th session of the United Nations General Assembly at U.N. headquarters Thursday, Sept. 27, 2012.
IT is a sorry state of affairs when people have to point out when they’re using irony. And Madonna, a notorious sarcastic ol’ thing, has had to do exactly that after everyone got jumpy about her calling Barack Obama a “black Muslim” during a show in Washington
A video shows Madge saying: “Now, it’s so amazing and incredible to think that we have an African-American in the White House … we have a black Muslim in the White House … it means there is hope in this country, and Obama is fighting for gay rights, so support the man!”
Cue a pointless furore, to which Madonna (who we’re legally obliged to refer to as ‘The Material Girl’ at some point in this article) responded:
“I was being ironic on stage. Yes, I know Obama is not a Muslim – though I know that plenty of people in this country think he is. And what if he were? The point I was making is that a good man is a good man, no matter who he prays to. I don’t care what religion Obama is – nor should anyone else in America.”
ANDREW Mitchell, the Government’s Chief Whip, and his bicycle are now a song. It is NSFW. It is also repetitive, which kind of makes it work:
THE Sun has been leading with news of Andrew Mitchell, the Chief Whip accused of calling a policeman a “fucking pleb” after a policeman told him he could nto ride his bicycle through the main gates on Downing Street. The front-page headlines so far:
September 26: “Plebs minister blags a Jaguar – he “demanded a limo” for the “200-yard commute from his Downing Street office to the Commons”
September 25: “Now cop ‘pleb’ row minister claims outburst came after ‘a long and frustrating day.’ Presumably this included his gruelling lunchtime sesh at UK’s poshest curry house. It’s SPINDALOO”…
September 24: “Plebs Row: The Offical Report”
September 23: “On yer bike – Gate rant at woman PC”
September 21: “Cabinet Minister: Police are plebs”
No other story is more important to the Sun than this one.
THIS is what the police officer who says Andrew Mitchell called a pleb wrote in their police log.
NICK Clegg has been on the Andrew Marr show. Says Clegg:
“This is part and parcel of something which I think most people agree with, which is that as we fill in the black hole in the public finances we have also got to make sure that we do not put Humpty Dumpty back together again and make the same mistakes, that we rewire the British economy and make it fairer and give people more opportunities.”
MITT Romney has been texting – in secret quite rooms:
MITT Romney’s campaign for the US Presidency is been damaged by a gaffe. Sure, it was an effort to look honest. But Romney’s criticism of the poor was caught on tape. He said 47% of Americans think of themselves as victims. He said: “[My] job is not to worry about those people. I’ll never convince them they should take personal responsibility and care for their lives.”
Mitt Romney’s father was George Romney. He might have been president. But then he gaffed. George Romney, governor of Michigan said the right things that might have united a nation:
“Michigan’s most urgent human rights problem is racial discrimination — in housing, public accommodation, education, administration of justice and employment….It was only after I got to Detroit that I got to know Negroes and began to be able to evaluate them, and I began to recognise that some Negroes are better and more capable than lots of whites.”
TO Pakistan, where to celebrate the government-declared “special day of love” for the Prophet Muhammad a man has been murdered in the northern city of Peshawar, celebrants have been much ranting and shouting at pigeons, and Baarck Obama has been turned into a traditional pin-striped Guy by those Bonfire Night enthusiasts and turned into a beacon of love.
Remember, remember the 19th of September…
BELGIUM’S Green Party is magic. Truly. In this group photo, you can see that with a bean-rich diet, legs need not be barrier to height. The Green Party stands for transparency and truth in all things…
WHAT news of Rick Perry – he who told us how the US patriots saw off the Tudors & Stuarts - the brave, white Christian male in the Brokeback Mountain jacket holding a big sausage who might have been President of the USA?
“There’s no easy way to say this. We made a pledge. We didn’t stick to it, and for that I am sorry.”
WHY is George Osborne screwing with your benefits? Because he can, basically. But the how is more interesting:
If the move is implemented, many benefits would be frozen for two years, then rising only in line with average pay.
Leave aside the freeze for a moment. Concentrate on the average pay instead. The “only” part.
“[They] believe that they are victims, who believe the Government has a responsibility to care for them. These are people who pay no income tax … I’ll never convince them they should take personal responsibility and care for their lives…”
His job “is not to worry about those people”…
“Frankly, I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth.”
ONE thing you cannot escape noticing is that Islamists love scarecrows. Wherever and whenever an anti-American protest breaks out some gurning loon will be there with an effigy of the US President he wants to set on fire. It isn’t Santa Claus’s Christmas, Halloween or Mother’s Day the US should have exported round the globe – it’s Bonfire Night, that British custom of spending every November 5th in the company of a stuffed, militant religionist (in this case the Catholic Guy Fawkes) with a rocket up his arse. If you want to show the jihadis that they are not the enemy, give them a hot jacket potato, a sparkler and invite them to bring an effigy to burn on the Bonfire. Recently, the Bonfire Nighters have been focusing on Barack Obama. Here are some of the best scarecrows/ effigies / Guys so far:
A university student of Nangarhar, makes a U.S. flag, as others hold an effigy of U.S. President Barack Obama during a demonstration in Jalalabad east of Kabul, Afghanistan on Sunday, Nov. 20, 2011.
TO Friern Barnet Library, where “community librarians” (eight squatters) have gained access to the closed amenity. They vow to reopen the library, which was closed by cost-cutting Barnet council in April.
Squatter Dan, 31, tells the Evening Standard:
“Libraries are cultural hubs, there are lots of reasons why people need them. People need to read books — even in the age of the internet, libraries are really crucial.”
SAY what you will about Mitt Romney. He does, however, answer a question. What is Obama’s view on legalising marijuana and gay marriage? He will have a debate…
PS: My mother had one rule: never trust a man who dyes his hair. They both do…
Says Arnold Schwarzenegger: “I need your clothes, your boots, and your Barclays cycle…”
THE Race for the White House with Instagram. Associated Press photographers have been using Instagram to follow Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan’s Republican bid for Presidency of the United States:
“Ima hitpresident Obama with that Lee Harvey Oswald swag.”
“Well Ima Assassinate president Obama this evening !…Gotta get this monkey off my chest while he’s in town -_-.”
“is gonna be defenseless once I aim the Assault Rifle at Barack’s Forehead… F* the #DNC.”