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Politicians | Anorak - Part 30

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Politicans and world leaders making news and in the news, and spouting hot air

Eric Joyce MP banned from every pub in Britain

ERIC Joyce MP has been appearing at Westminster Magistrates Court in London. He has been found guilty of head-butting a Tory rival in a House of Commons bar brawl. Conservative MP for Pudsey, Stuart Andrew, was injured during a rumpus in the Strangers’ Bar.

Joyce has escaped a custodial sentence, being handed to a 12-month community order, fined £3,000, ordered to pay £1,400 in compensation, barred from any pub for 3 months and has a Fri-Sun curfew from 8pm-4am.

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Posted: 9th, March 2012 | In: Politicians | Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Tory Minister Chloe Smith tells Bolton women to make 280-mile daily trip to Sunderland for work

CHLOE Smith, a Conservative Treasury minister and MP for Norwich North, is in touch with her region:

David Crausby MP introduced a woman from his Bolton constituency who complained that her hours as a care worked for the Care Association had been reduced from 28 to 20 per week. One problem is that couples must now work 24 instead of 16 hours per week to be eligible for tax credits.

Crausby asks Smith: “What advice would the minister give to my constituent other than stop work and go on benefits?”

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Posted: 8th, March 2012 | In: Politicians | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


David Cameron’s wolf whistle politics – making saucy whistling a crime

DAVID Cameron is out to ban the wolf whistle. Well, so says the Sun. The less sensational story is that Cameron is to sign the country up to Council of Europe’s convention on violence against women.

The Guardian writes:

Among the pledges in the convention, which has already been signed by 18 countries including Germany, France and Ukraine, is one to pass legislation or other measures to criminalise or impose other sanctions for “unwanted verbal, non-verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature with the purpose or effect of violating the dignity of a person, in particular when creating an intimidating, hostile, degrading, humiliating or offensive environment”.

Unwanted? How do you qualify unwanted?

Better to rebrand the wold whistle to something less predatory, like the frog whistle or the teddy bear whistle. Wolves don’t whistle. But rabbits might.

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Posted: 8th, March 2012 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Rick Sartonum is a social lubricant cocktail

RICK Santorum’s anal issues have inspired a new cocktail.The Brooklyn Paper reports:

“People really like it even though it’s named after something gross — both the person and the Dan Savage meaning,” said John Rauschenberg, co-owner of Pacific Standard. “It’ll be an election fixture at least until primary season is over.”

The duo behind the beer hole near St. Mark’s Place often put out cocktails with suggestive names, such as the Corn Holed Fashioned or Mike Gallego’s Cup.

But the Santorum, a milky mixture of Baileys, orange vodka, bitters and chocolate flakes, seems to be sticking.

We won’t explain how the drink matches up with an alternate definition of the word “Santorum,” as The Brooklyn Paper is a family publication — but the bar’s liberal proprietors are certain it’ll satisfy any boozy desires.

The “social lubricant” will go down well…(fnar)….

Spotter: Joe.My.God

Posted: 7th, March 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Ed Miliband says boycott the Sun – so David Miliband writes for it

SAYS Ed Miliband:

“News International have sullied the character of reputation of British journalism”March 3, 2012

All good and true Labour supporters must boycott the Sun, says Ed.

“Sunk by a wave of freedom – David Miliband writes why Russian election could be end of Putin” – March 4, 2012

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Posted: 7th, March 2012 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The many orgasm faces of George Osborne

THE many orgasm faces of George Osborne – as not seen by anyone other than his wife ever (and no prostitutes nor members of the Bullingdon club)…

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Spotters: @TomChivers, and TheMayCumFacesofGeorgeOsborne@Uponnothing

 

Posted: 7th, March 2012 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Putin denies contact with sun-dried tomatoes – follows all Russians on Twitter

AND the winner of the Presidential elections in Russia is…Vladimir Putin.

Some voters were undecided and wanted to wait until Putin took his shirt off one more time before deciding if he still had it. Their deliberations were cut short when Putin tweeted: “I’m following you – all of you.”

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Posted: 5th, March 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Barack Obama’s transgender nanny was a prostitute – Evie tells all

EVER hear of Barack Obama’s “transgender ex-nanny outcast”?

The AP has. It introduces the world to Evie. She looked after Barry Obama when he lived in Indonesia. Evie is a woman trapped in a man’s body. She tells a tale of brutality and hate in Indonesia. She says a trangendered friend of hers was killed on account of her sexuality. It made Evie toss sway her dresses and make-up and live as man in fear. Says Evie:

“I knew in my heart I was a woman, but I didn’t want to die like that. So I decided to just accept it. … I’ve been living like this, a man, ever since.”

The report adds:

Nobody knows how many of them live in the sprawling archipelagic nation of 240 million, but activists estimate 7 million. Because Indonesia is home to more Muslims than any other country in the world, the pervasiveness of men who live as women and vice versa often catches newcomers by surprise. They hold the occasional pageant, work as singers or at salons and include well-known celebrity talk show host Dorce Gamalama.

Pageants does not sound like a group living in constant fear. And why should Muslims be less understanding of transgender people than, says, Catholics in Northern Ireland or Sikhs in the Punjab?

…the country’s highest Islamic body has decreed that they are required to live as they were born because each gender has obligations to fulfill, such as reproduction.

“They must learn to accept their nature,” says Ichwan Syam, a prominent Muslim cleric at the influential Indonesian Ulema Council. “If they are not willing to cure themselves medically and religiously” they have “to accept their fate to be ridiculed and harassed.”

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Posted: 5th, March 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Ron Paul: Why does New Jersey Synagogue ‘firebomber’ Aakash Dalal like Ron Paul?

AAKASH Dalal and Anthony Graziano have been arrested in connection with the fire-bombings of New Jersey synagogues. On Dalal’s Facebook page is photo of him with Ron Paul.
What do racists see in Ron Paul – and does he attract them with his newsletters?

Posted: 4th, March 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Liverpool Council makes disabled walk to 13th floor assessment office

LIVERPOOL city council thought it a good idea for disabled motorists to undergo medical examinations for parking permit blue badges on the 13th level of a car park. To further test the authenticity of claims, the lift (buttons: ‘calm down’ and ‘eh up lad’) at the Mount Pleasant car park stops on the 11th floor.

A disabled driver complains that “a set of stairs has to be negotiated before emerging at the correct level and having done this there is a long walk for someone of limited ability”.

Should those who make it be denied the badge? Or should the badges be reserved to those who never reach the 13th floor?

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Posted: 4th, March 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


David Cameron on a horse – photo

THE Daily Mail has a photo of David Cameron on a horse. The paper has used its horsey photoshop skills (mroe here) to show us Cameron on to a horse. As @scaryduck says: “Worst Old Spice advert ever”…

Story here.

 

 

Posted: 3rd, March 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Vladimir Putin strips off for the voters (again)

VLADIMIR Putin is warming up for his re-election as Russia’s leading action figure by surviving an assassination attempt by a gang formed by Doku Umarov, the warlord leading an Islamist insurgency in Chechnya – the usual Chechen suspects (Adam Osmayev and Ilya Pyanzin) have been arrested by the Security Service of Ukraine (SBU) in Odessa before they could do anything – and stripping 0ff for a photoshoot.

Hubert Seipel has in I Putin captured Putin relaxing. Voters can see Putin swimming while his dog Koni looks on; playing ice hockey; fighting a woman at judo; and looking hot and sweaty by pile of coffee cups.

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Posted: 28th, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Angela Merkel gets beer poured down her neck – video

IN this video, German leader Angela Merkel get a glass or more of beer poured down her neck.

No. Not like Bob Hawk. The beer goes down the back of her neck, inside the collar of her dress.

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Posted: 27th, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Ken Livingstone is the 1% standing with the 99%

KEN Livingstone wants to be London mayor. And he wants all elected officials to pay all taxes due. As he says:

“THESE rich bastards just don’t get it…No one should be allowed to vote in a British election, let alone sit in our Parliament, unless they are paying their full share of tax.”

Adding:

“[We should] sweep away tax scams and everybody should pay tax at the same rate on earnings and other income.”

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Posted: 27th, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Fairey story: Obama’s HOPE artist faces prison

SHEPARD Fairey was once one of the world’s most famous artists. His Barack Obama “HOPE” poster was all over the world. Now he faces prison:

The street artist Shepard Fairey, whose “Hope” campaign poster of Barack Obama became an enduring symbol of his last presidential campaign, pleaded guilty Friday to a charge stemming from his misconduct in trying to bolster claims in a lawsuit over which photograph had been used as a basis for the poster.

Mr. Fairey, 42, sued The Associated Press in 2009 after it contended he had infringed on the copyright of one of its photographs in creating the poster.

Now you mention it, there is a vague similarity

Mr. Fairey had claimed in his suit that he had used a different photograph of Mr. Obama, but later admitted that he had been mistaken and had tried to conceal his mistake, by destroying documents and fabricating others.

“I was ashamed that I had done these things, and I knew I should have corrected my actions,” he said on Friday in Federal District Court in Manhattan.

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Posted: 25th, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Eric Joyce’s Glasgow kiss gets him fast-tracked to SNP safe seat

DID Labour MP for Falkirk Eric Joyce headbutt Tory MP for Pudsey Stuart Andrew in the Strangers Bar in the Commons? Joyce has been arrested.

Rumours are that Joyce also attacked three other Conservatives and one Labour MP during the incident, at around 11pm.

A Scotland Yard spokesman tells the Press Association:

“We were called at approximately 10.50pm (on Wednesday) to reports of a disturbance at a bar within the House of Commons. A man aged in his 50s was arrested by officers on suspicion of assault. He remains in custody in a central London police station. Inquiries are continuing.”

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Posted: 23rd, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Chavez reaches for the old anti-Semitism to slam Henrique Capriles Radonski

HENRIQUE Capriles Radonski is the leader of Hugo Chavez’s opposition in Venezuela. Radonski is the 39-year-old governor of the state of Miranda and leader of the Democratic Unity coalition.

Peru’s conservative Nobel literature laureate Mario Vargos Llosa asked:

“Who says there can’t be a Venezuelan spring?” 

So. How does Chavez attacked Mr Radonski before they meet at the polls on October 7? Well,  Capriles parents’ are Jews. Chavez does not like the Jews.

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Posted: 21st, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Andrew Lawnsley: Do you know what it’s like to mop up my mother’s piss?

HEALTH Secretary Andrew Lawnsley being asked by a member of the public if he knows what it’s like to mop up her mother’s piss…

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Posted: 20th, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comments (17) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Bears weep for Kim Jong-il – North Korea’s Generalissimo

HOW did you mark what would have been the 70th birthday of North Korea’s Dear Leader, Kim Jong-il? Well, his son and heir Kim Jong-un and other top knobs stood by a massive picture of of the Dear Leader in Pyonyang. There were TV specials, flowers, fireworks, military marches and a massive bronze statue of the Dear Leader and his dad Kim Il-sung sat on his ‘n’ his horses. Kim Jong-il also scored a new title. He is and will be the “Generalissimo”.

And that as not all:

The Guardian: “Events on Wednesday included an international skating show and synchronised swimming. Both opened with mournful odes to Kim Jong-il and ended with a new song for his son: ‘We Will Defend General Kim Jong-un at the Risk of Our Lives.'”

Sing. SING! SING!!!!!

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Posted: 17th, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Toys are not citizens of Russia so cannot protest legally says Russian law

TO Siberia, where it’s so cold that human protestors have made way for 100 Kinder Surprise toys, 100 Lego people, 20 model soldiers, 15 soft toys and 10 toy cars.

And now they too are gone from Barnaul, Russia.

The burgers have decreed that the action figure massing is “an unsanctioned public event”. It may very well be that your Barbie Park Meet ‘n’ Greet is against the law. So too the Teddy Bears’ Picnic.

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Posted: 15th, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Anonymous emails tie Syria’s Assad to George Galloway’s Gaza Flotilla and ‘easily manipulated’ Americans

Anonymous emails link Syria’s Assad to George Galloway and ‘easily manipulated’ Americans.

ASMA Assad, 36, the Vogue-approved wife to Syrian President, Bashar Assad, has spoken to the Times about her life and concerns.

Says Asma Assad in an email:

“The President is the President of Syria, not a faction of Syrians, and the First Lady supports him in that role.”

Hurrah!

“The First Lady’s very busy agenda is still focused on supporting the various charities she has long been involved with and rural development as well as supporting the President as needed. These days she is equally involved in bridging gaps and encouraging dialogue. She listens to and comforts the families of the victims of the violence.”

Charity work must go on! Wernher von Braun was right – how the widows and cripples of old Homs Town will owe their large bags of second hand clothes and text books to Bashar Von Braun.

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Posted: 7th, February 2012 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Silvio Berlusconi says he’s a Playman who loves the gays

SILVIO Berlusconi is the Playman – with realistic wandering hands:

 “I’m not a Playboy, I’m a Play-uomo [Playman] … The only thing I have not been accused of in all these over-hyped descriptions of my relations with women, with the opposite sex, the only thing they have never accused me of is being gay. I have nothing against homosexuals, let it be clear. Quite the contrary. I always thought the more gay people around, the less competition.”

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Posted: 6th, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Green Chris Huhne undone by driving allegation – oh, the irony

CHRIS Huhne, a man who championed green alternatives, has been unstitched – irony of ironies – by a car. Huhne has resigned from the Cabinet following allegations that he got his then wife Vicky Pryce to take the rap for his speeding. She got points. He got off – not last of all with his mistress. The wife became an ex and the story reached the Crown Prosecution Service, which says there is sufficient evidence to prosecute Huhne for perverting the course of justice.

Pryce will also be charged with perverting the course of justice.

Says Huhne, who resigned as Climate Change Secretary but not as MP for Eastleigh:

“I’m innocent of these charges and I will fight them in the courts and I’m sure a jury will agree.”

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Posted: 3rd, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comments (2) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Westminster bars Top Totty: Kate Green or Katie Green?

TOP Totty, the smooth-skinned amber-skinned lovely with a good head, will not be in Westminster’s The Strangers’ Bar. The image has been deemed offensive to sherry drinkers and other women.

Shadow equalities minister Kate Green, Stretford and Urmston MP, found the “picture of a nearly naked woman on the tap” offensive. And because she was offended, the beer, on sale since 2007, has been banned.

Green then called on the Commons to champion “dignity at work in Parliament”.

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Posted: 3rd, February 2012 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Trump and Romney dupe media with unimportant story, says media

MITT Romney is now supported by Donald Trump, he of the tsunami fringe. The Guardian reports this nugget in an unusual fashion:

Mitt Romney wins backing of Donald Trump ahead of Nevada caucuses

Business magnate and champion self-publicist Donald Trump has endorsed Republican presidential Mitt Romney in an event of no importance but one that successfully diverted media attention from the other candidates only two days before the Nevada caucuses.

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Posted: 3rd, February 2012 | In: Politicians | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0