Royal Family Category
The Royal Family, the House of Windsor, in the news and on a horse
HUZZAH! prince Harry Baseball Cap and Cressida Bonas (fnar) are back on. The Mail tells readers:
But after just three weeks apart, the pair have had a secret reunion and are now back in ‘constant touch’.
THE Sun says “CHEEKY restaurant staff cleaned up after a visit from Princes William and Harry — by flogging their dirty dishes.”
So. Plates and glasses touched by the princes’s honeyed lips at Memphis’ Rendevous eatery “started a bidding war to the 100-strong crowd outside.”
IN their wisdom, Titan have invited us to promote their gambling service with their infographic “5 Premier League players who wouldn’t do well in the Celebrity Big Brother Betting”. The writer of the article has, of course, got it utterly wrong. They’ve plumped for the five people you’d most like to see in the TV house, although we’d replace the charmless Diouf with John Terry.
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A BIG (helping) hand please for the fall guys…
A month of extreme weather and Winter Olympics has brought the downfall of members of the public…
PRINCE William has told the Guardian’s reporter (and others): “Why don’t you put your notebook down and give us a hand with the sandbags?” Wills and Prince Harry have been moving sandbags in flood-hit Datchet, Berkshire.
The reporters said they would help. But Royal aides said they could not because of their ‘inappropriate clothing’.
FLASHBACK to August 5, 1953: Exiled Egyptian King Farouk strolls in the sun by the swimming pool at singer Gracie Fields’ restaurant, Canzone del Mare, on the Isle of Capri, Italy. King Farouk and his family spent time as guests of the British star. With Farouk is his wife, Queen Narriman, their young son, the new King Ahmed Faud II, and three daughters of Farouk from a previous marriage. (AP Photo)
CHERYL Cole has ago but role of “nation’s sweetheart”. But now thank to Max Clifford Solution, you can hark back to those halcyon days of Princess Diana and Jade Goody in “Together Forever” – features “two Princesses from opposite side of the track, joined forever in happiness in the hereafter.
“From the authentic matchplay-grade table tennis table, to the bats backed with genuine dimpled rubber, to the intricately sculpted angel wings, every details of this collectors’ heirloom figurine is designed to give you joy”
PRINCE William, needed only an A, B and C in his A-levels to get into Cambridge University Normally the University requires an A* and two As. But the Prince is not normal.
All the pretence that he is – the middle-class accent, calling people “guys” and not “serfs” and showing us pictures of his baby (so very Facebook) are just sops to the saps. The boy’s a toff.
Mary Beard, Cambridge University’s Professor of Classics, says Wills should use the jaunt to mix with the riff-raff, telling the Daily Mail: “I very much hope that he will take the opportunity to meet some of our more ‘ordinary’ students, struggling with making ends meet, worried about careers, future and debt.”
WHAT did the Royal Family look like 100 years ago? 1913 was the year before the war to end wars. Were those halcyon days? No.
Women wanted a better deal. In June 1913 Emily Wilding Davison dashed in front of the king’s horse at the Epsom Derby in the name of women’s suffrage. Four days later she died. One month later, 50,000 women massed in Hyde Park, London organised by the National Union of Women’s Suffrage Societies. They would shot Herbert Asquith, the Liberal Prime Minister, how many women wanted the right to vote.
Sparks were flying in Europe.Lenin and Trotsky were talking of revolution as they toured Europe. At once point, Hitler, Trotsky, Tito, Freud and Stalin all lived in one corner of Vienna.
Empires were on the wane. Nations were the future. Australia and India wanted to move away from Britain. There was turmoil in Ireland. Workers united to push back the drowning tide of grinding poverty in a strike that would become the Dublin Lockout.
FLASHBACK to August 8, 1977: A giant inflatable golliwog in the crowd greeting Queen Elizabeth II at Filton High School, Bristol, during her Silver Jubilee tour of Great Britain.
HOW goes Prince Harry’s plans for a trek with wounded soldiers to the South Pole – the Walking With The Wounded South Pole Allied Challenge?
Bad news. He’s suffered an injury. The Daily Express reports the words of a Kensington Palace spokesman:
“He’s broken his toe but he will still be taking part. It won’t have any impact on him. It’s still very much on.”
FIRST Prince Harry dressed up a comedy Nazi.Now the Sun reports that another “toff” has donned the feldgrau:
TOFF in a Swastika outfit partied with Prince Harry’s girlfriend Cressida Bonas — but insisted last night: “I wasn’t a Nazi, I was an officer who tried to kill Hitler.”
He dressed as a failure?
Eton-educated financier Alex Stanbury, 34, chose the German military uniform for a zombie-themed bash attended by posh revellers including Princess Beatrice. Cressida, 24, mixed with the Iron Cross wearing reveller — reviving memories of her boyfriend Prince Harry’s Nazi uniform gaffe.
FACE of the day: The Prince of Wales during a visit to the Serum Institute of India, in Pune west India, on the fifth day of his official visit with the Duchess of Cornwall, to India and Sri Lanka.
WHICH Member of the Royal Family can wear the biggest Remembrance Day Poppy?
A Firework Hits Buckingham Palace (Gif) As Her Majesty Gets A Yangban Mask For A South Korea Banquet (Photos)
WRITES Brendan O’Neill of last Guy Fawkes’ Night night’s protest outside Buckingham Palace:
As the general public burnt effigies of the Catholic reactionary Guy Fawkes, radicals were dressing up as him and screeching at parliament. Further proof that ordinary people are more progressive than what now passes for the left.
A firework was tossed at the Palace:
HE might be only 3 months old, but shitting hell, Prince George is on a steep learning curve to find out how bizarre the human race is.
Today, third in line to a chair, he found himself being dipped in some water while someone said something about Jesus. Not just any water though. This water came all the way from the River Jordan, presumably purified to the point of Evian.
He was dragged to a huge building where there’s also a load of rotting corpses by a man who sometimes wears bejeweled dressing gowns, massive pointy hats and asks for advice from talking clouds.
AFTER the epic front-page screamer, the news of how Princess Diana’s ghost told Kate Middleton: “You’re too thin!”
Peter Dyke stares into his crystal balls:
PRINCESS Diana is guiding the Duchess of Cambridge from beyond the grave, the late royal’s former spiritual counsellor says.
AND coming from Princess Diana, who hasn’t eaten a thing in ages, that’s a bit rich:
* Diana’s ghost lives on the fabled Sixth Floor of the Harvey Nichol’s Department store.
THE Royal Family cost the taxpayer £33.3m last year. Branding experts say they brought in more than £20bn.
How you regard those figures and which you choose to highlight will depend on your view of the monarchy, a subject on which few of us are ambivalent.