Royal Family Category
The Royal Family, the House of Windsor, in the news and on a horse
LADIES Day at Royal Ascot is that time when ladies wear unwearable hats in deference to aged protocol. The highlight was not only the Queen’s first win in the Gold Cup – Jockey Ryan Moore rode the Queen’s filly Estimate to victory – and the Times’s headline which seems to praise Her Majesty’s sprinting abilities – “Royal Ascot crowned by first Gold Cup victory for the Queen” – but Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie reprising their roles as Cinderella’s panto sisters, a decent each-way bet to win the World’s Most Obsequious Man contest, a woman in a brim so wide the ancient god Saturn thought it a bit OTT and another who seemed to be channeling Pegasus:
TODAY Kate, Duchess of Cambridge, smashed 15litre of champagne into boat called the Royal Princess. We know that’s the name of because Kate told us “I name this ship Royal Princess … May God bless her and all who sail in her.” The nebuchadnezzar of Moët & Chandon retails at £1,250.
The Mirror said “It smashed into the ship’s side and burst as if it had been shot from a cannon.”
Kate was accompanied by the Southampton Dock by the Band of the Royal Marines and the Irish Guards Pipers. The Bishop of Winchester, the Right Rev Tim Dakin, did a blessing. The former chairman of P&O Cruises, Lord Sterling of Plaistow, told the Times:
“I remember when young Diana named her first cruise ship and she said she was quite nervous. The Duchess was wonderful today. She has this very relaxed easy style with people, not just the high and mighty.”
TODAY the Queen officially opened the BBC’s rebuilt Broadcasting House. At one point she photobombed the newsreaders:
THE Coronation Review of The Fleet at Spithead. On July 14 1953 the newly crowned Queen was piped onboard:
These photographs include snaps of the Queen carrying out the Coronation Review of the Royal Air Force, at RAF Station, Odiham, Hampshire.
IN 60 photos the celebrations to mark 60 years of Her Majesty The Queen Elizabeth 2 on the throne.
Before 2000 guests at Westminster Abbey, The Archbishop of Canterbury commended the Queen’s “utter self-sacrifice” ever since holy oils anointed her Queen on June, 2, 1953.
White jihadi plot to kill Prince Harry – homeless fraudster turns to Islam for free prison bed and food
IN “Jihad Brit in Harry kill plot”, the Sun reports on “a white Muslim convert” who “walked into a police station and told cops he was going to kill Prince Harry”.
Ashraf Islam made his chilling threat a day after the murder of soldier Lee Rigby in Woolwich, South London.
Islam, 30, is now facing ten years in jail after admitting threatening to kill soldier Harry, 28, who is third in line to the throne.
Islam has stood in the doc at Uxbridge Magistrates’ Court and pleaded guilty. He’s in custody awaiting sentencing.
The Sun adds that police allegedly found a laptop belonging to Islam “showing internet searches for kidnapping, guns and vans. His internet history is also said to show he had been on terrorist and firearms websites.”
What did Prince Philip say to a Polish research scientist as he toured Cambridge’s Medical Research Council’s Laboratory of Molecular Biology?
WHAT did Prince Philip says to a Polish research scientist as he toured Cambridge’s Medical Research Council’s Laboratory of Molecular Biology (LMB)?
a) “Watch out for the Germans”
b) “Liz’s plumbing’s gone bit leaky”
CAN it be that Princess Charlene of Monaco thinks Prince Albert not enough for her? Allegations abound that the Princess is doing a Diana with a rugby player. This one’s called Byron Kelleher, a 36-year-old former All Black.
In photos: Prince Harry meets the cheer leading display team at the US Air Force Academy base in Colorado Springs
PRINCE Harry continues his trip to the US of A with a visit to the cheer leading display in the American football indoor training centre, at the US Air Force Academy base in Colorado Springs, USA, during the Warrior Games.
Spot the Blue Blood
PRINCE Harry is in the USA. The focus is on the girls cooing for the guys and his work with the Halo Trust, the world’s biggest demining organisation. The United States is not a signatory to the 1997 international Mine Ban Treaty. It reserves the right to deploy “smart mines” that can deactivate or self-destruct. Mines are ok, so long as you blow people’s legs off with sensitivity and thought.
THE tree amigos, the House of Windsor’s A-team, Brand Royal that is Duchess Kate, Prince Harry Baseball Cap and Wills made a visit to the Harry Potter film set during their visit to Warner Bros studios in Leavesden, Herts, where the movies were produced. Looking at Harry it is obvious that he could play Ron Weasley, the third wheel in the Hermione Granger / Harry Potter love triangle. One can imagine the Queen looking over the pictures and wondering if the Royal baby will be ginger, like Harry or, say, James Hewitt. But who needs magick when you have PR, lawyers and compliance..?
When Princess Diana played Golden Girl Dorothy, dodged a ‘randy old Taurean’ and went to the gay bar with Freddie Mercury
KENNY Everett’s busty distraction Cleo Rocos has a book out. One section deals with the time she met Princess Diana. Over bellinis, Shy Di would refer to people as “that randy old Taurean” or “Typical Sagittarian, always dancing on the table with a bottle of vodka down his trousers.”
Everett, Rocos and Di then went back to Kenny’s penthouse to watch The Golden Girls. Mercury popped over. The foursome ad libbed their version of the show. Everett was Blanche, Diana was Dorothy, Mercury was Sophie and Rocos was Rose.
HOW the media works: the paper have been at the Cheltenham Festival. If Pippa Middleton is not in the stalls, the journalists turn their eyes to any other female Royal. They spot Zara Phillips.
The Telegraph’s Andrew Hough reports:
She may be the Queen’s grand-daughter but that did not stop security guards at Cheltenham Festival from blocking Zara Phillips access to the parade ring.
The Daily Mail’s Ruth Styles and Louise Eccles report:
She might be the Queen’s granddaughter, but that does not always guarantee the royal treatment. Zara Phillips was blocked from leaving the parade ring at Cheltenham yesterday by a security guard.
WHEN her Majesty The Queen puts down her copy of Majesty – ‘The Quality Royal Magazine’ – (an ITV documentary reveals that Liz subscribes to the organ that records her own life. Whenever Phil asks her how her day went she can just toss the mag over to him and say,’There. Take a look’) she can look at her face on coins and bank notes. (Her Majesty is thought to favour the 10pence piece because it has no crow’s feet.) It’s all pretty samey – unless she see what this artist has down to her likeness on the Australian five dollar note.
USWeekly says Duchess Kate’s baby will be called Elizabeth Diana Carole. They’ll name the child after Prince William’s granny. Middle names will be nods to the couple’s mothers.
The brains at the US glossy maust have spent moments working that out. The only good thing is that initials, EDC, will give Lizzy-DC a name for her signature Eau De Cologne. But other than that it’s low on thrills. Still, we know it’s a girl. And, according to OK!’s cover, “Having a girl would make Diana happy.”
CRESSIDA Bonas, Prince Harry’s latest flame, appears in an OK! magazine feature. The mag wants us to look beyond the “long glossy hair, flawless kin and sparkling smile” to see the woman of substance beneath the perfection. In a section headed “Beauty And Brains”, OK! notes:
“And Cressida has worked hard too, studying dance at the University of Leeds. She’s also modelled for Burberry and has experience as a ski instructor.”
IS Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge, having a dinosaur? When Sandra Cook, 67, gave Kate a teddy bear in Grimsby, the Duchess said: “Thank you, I’ll give that to my d…”
Daughter. Sandra Cook thought so. Kate never finished the word. Sandra pressed her.
“No, we don’t know,” said Kate. “We’re not telling.”
THE Duchess of Cambridge sits next to a dummy of the Ship’s Mate at the Skipper’s Table on display during her tour of the National Fishing Heritage Centre, Grimsby.
HOW does the media respond to news that Queen Elizabeth 2 is unwell? Her Majesty has been at the King Edward VII Hospital, London, where Kate Middleton went for morning sickness treatment. The Daily Mail leads with “DON’T MAKE A FUSS” – new of the Queen’s “stoicism” – the Times leads with two coppers stood by a door (one of them is 7ft 2in PC Anthony Wallyn) and the Sun finds a pun withy “Her Majesty The Queasy”.
WHEN Prince Harry went to Lesotho, he met with Prince Seeiso at the Kananelo Centre for the Deaf, in the Maseru district of Lesotho. Harry danced, and in any language we knew what he meant. Extempore dancing is to most of us a hellish ordeal. At dos, Anorak heads to the middle of the dance floor in the hope that everyone dancing around him will act like those whirling anchovy shoals in wildlife documentaries, swirling about and making the centre invisible. It never works. The music changes; people slump off; an overexcited woman commands just one more dance. The band strikes up Wake Me Up Before You GoGo, by Wham! Game Harry then went to St. Bernadette School for the Visually Impaired. It was all for charity. At one point someone drew a picture of Prince William on the black baord, and everyone laughed:
DID you know that Prince Harry’s new girlfriend, Cressida Bonas, had a nickname in school? The Mirror says she was known as “Bon-arse” by her friends. The Mirror informs its learned readers that it’s combination of the “French word for good and her surname”. The rets of you who didn’t go to a “Posh” school like Stowe, could not hope to think of nickname for a gel called BONAS. CRESSIDA BONAS…