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Transfer Balls: Liverpool and Chelsea’s Kevin De Bruyne wants to play for Manchester United

Transfer Balls catches news of Wolfsburg winger Kevin De Bruyne, 23. The BBC notes that the former Chelsea player “says he would be open to a Premier League return”.

One game we play is to see if the media can link a player with all five of the big clubs: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City and Manchester United.

The BBC says “with Manchester United mulling over a £30m bid for the former Chelsea player”.

The BBC delivers this as fact. Only at the end does it say the source for the scoop is the Daily Express.

Over there, the paper reports:


Screen shot 2015-02-26 at 21.09.08


How badly does Kevin De Bruyne want to play for Manchester United? He’s quoted:

“I feel very much at home with VfL Wolfsburg in this very moment. I am able to sign a new contract with Wolfsburg. Life in football can be fast moving. Football is much about money. Wolfsburg is not yet like Bayern Munich, of course. And my biggest ambition is to come out for a big European club. One I can win trophies with. As much trophies as possible.”

That would be Real Madrid, then. Or Bayern Munich. Or PSG. Or… Or… De Bruyne makes not  single mention of Manchester Untied, who are not even in this season’s Champions’ League and not close to winning the Premier League.

The Daily Star then spins the balls to take in Chelsea and Arsenal.

Screen shot 2015-02-26 at 21.13.14



Oh. And Manchester City:


Screen shot 2015-02-26 at 21.14.09


And over in the Sun, the news is that De Bruyne is a…Liverpool fan.

It’s a Full House of Balls.

Such are the facts.

Posted: 26th, February 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Sami Khedira joins Arsenal, Chelsea, Manchester United and Bayern Munich

Transfer Balls: the Daily Express has news on Arsenal, Chelsea and Sami Khedira.

Arsenal and Chelsea have been joined by Schalke in the race to sign Real Madrid midfielder Sami Khedira.

So. Khedira, curently at Real Madrid, is off to either Arsenal, Chelsea or Schalke.

It’s just that the Daily Express told us that Khedira was off to Manchester United:


Screen shot 2015-02-26 at 11.48.58


And there was Bayen Munich, who wanted the player:


Screen shot 2015-02-26 at 11.50.30


And signed the player:

Screen shot 2015-02-26 at 11.51.15


But let’s see what Bild, source of the Express’ latest scoop, has to say:

Two weeks ago, in turn, the Spanish radio station Cadena Ser had reported that Khedira has already agreed to a Bundesliga. Perhaps it involves the FC Schalke …

Such are the facts…


Posted: 26th, February 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer balls: Arsenal, Liverpool, Chelsea and Manchester United in no-news shocker

Transfer Balls: a look at utter drivel presented as football news in the mainstream media. Today the Express says Liverpool are set to sign Raheem Sterling on a new contract, Arsenal are still going to bid for Paul Pogba, Incardi is off to Chelsea and there is some stuff about Manchester United.


Screen shot 2015-02-24 at 12.05.55



David Wright reports:

Raheem Sterling admits he’s close to putting pen to paper on a new deal at Liverpool, worth a reported £100,000-a-week.


The Express links to the Mail, which reports:

The England star, who is being monitored by Real Madrid, Bayern Munich and Paris Saint-Germain, is yet to commit his future to the Reds despite months of talks between the club and his representatives.

Over in the Liverpool Echo, Sterling is quoted:

“We’re working on it and hopefully it will be sorted soon.”

So. No news, then.

As for Paul Pogba to Arsenal, we’re told:

Arsenal are expected to step up their interest in Juventus midfielder Paul Pogba, who is valued at around £80m by the Serie A giants.

Expected by whom? Wright fails to say.

And Incardi? Well, that sgtpory is sourced in the Metro, which notes:

Chelsea are still in pole position to sign Mauro Icardi despite the striker holding contract talks with Inter Milan.

And now for that Manchester United news:

Manchester United are in talks with Fiorentina over a deal for former Manchester City flop Stefan Savic.

That story is soruced in the Daily Star, which reports:

Sport claims United were close to sealing a deal in January before Savic penned fresh terms with La Viola.

So, er, not close at all, then.

More no news in the Daily Express every day…



Posted: 24th, February 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Every single Spurs and Chelsea is a racist say the anti-football bigots

yid army


Fans of Chelsea and Spurs are racist. All of them. Every single one of them is a suspected racist. The Express, Mirror and Sun all lead with the news that Spurs and Chelsea fans are suspects in race crimes. Lord Herman Ouseley, the man the Sun labels the “Race chief” calls for police to “swamp” Wembley when Chelsea and Spurs contest this Sunday’s Capitol One Cup Final.

This week we saw a video of a few West Ham fans giving full throat to their foreskins on the way to play Spurs, a club gamely supported by their vocal and self-styled Yid Army. The Mail calls them “alleged” West Ham fans in language that makes us wonder if being a football fan is now a crime.

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Posted: 24th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Key Posts, Sports, Spurs | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Chelsea and West Ham United fans in battle of who is the more racist

Meet Richard Barklie, 50, of Carrickfergus, County Antrim, who was on the Paris Metro when a black man was barred from boarding the train.

Barklie is a former Royal Ulster Constabulary and Police Service of Northern Ireland officer,. He now works as a director of World Human Rights Forum.

It’s stated mission is:

To unite the human rights activists and organizations around the globe to protect and to promote human rights, values and global well being necessary for the creation of a better world order.

He’s one of the directors:

Screen shot 2015-02-23 at 10.37.20


Belfast solicitor Kevin Winters speaks on Barklie’s behalf. He says his client did not sing racist chants. He says his client is not a racist:

“As someone who has spent years working with disadvantaged communities in Africa and India, he can point to a CV in human rights work which undermines any suggestion he is racist.”

And, well, we didn’t see him singing anything in the video. And since when is singing a crime?

The full statement runs:

“We act on behalf of Mr Barklie identified as one of the people sought by authorities investigating an incident on the Paris Metro on 16/2/15 . We contacted London Metropolitan Police today to advise that our client is happy to assist with inquiries. Pending formal engagement with police, our client is anxious to put on record his total abhorrence for racism and any activity associated with it.

”As someone who has spent years working with disadvantaged communities in Africa and India he can point to a cv in human rights work which undermines any suggestion he is racist.

”Today a senior official in the World Human Rights Forum confirmed their support for him.

”Mr Barklie is a Chelsea season ticket holder and has travelled to matches for over 20 years now without incident

”He travelled alone to the Paris St Germain match and has no knowledge whatsoever of the identities of the other people depicted in recent YouTube video releases. He wants to stress that he was not and never has been part of any group or faction of Chelsea supporters.

”He did not participate in racist chanting and singing and condemns any behaviour supporting that.

”He accepts he was involved in an incident when a person now known to him as Souleymane S was unable to enter a part of the train.

”He has an account to give to police which will explain the context and circumstances as they prevailed at that particular time.

”In the meantime pending that, he wants to put on record his sincerest apologies for the trauma and stress suffered by Mr Souleymane.

”He readily acknowledges that any judgement on the integrity of his apology will be kept in abeyance pending the outworkings of the investigation.

”Given the extremely sensitive nature of the issues engaged we urge upon all media outlets to exercise as much restraint as possible when commenting on the case.

”We accept on behalf of our client that public interest demands nothing but total indignation and condemnation from all media reporting but such reporting ought not to persist at the expense of undermining Mr Barklie’s right to a fair trial

”Tonight London Met confirmed with us that arrangements were in hand to take the investigation to the next stage.”

Or as the Sunday World put it:


Screen shot 2015-02-23 at 11.13.12


Was it a “secret life”? Once upon a time a secret life would have meant you working as a spy, being gay or murdering womenm in Yorkshire. Now the guilty is secret is that you watch football.

And meanwhile…on the train to Spurs with the West Ham United fans:



But what’s odd about the Daily Mail’s take on that chanting is the headline:


Screen shot 2015-02-23 at 11.17.59


Yeah. Not alleged anti-semites. But “alleged West Ham fans” – as if being a West Ham United fan is a crime; just like being a Chelsea supporter is a “secret life”.

It’s not so much racism the papers hate – it’s football fans


Posted: 23rd, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Sports, Spurs | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Here is proof Jose Mourinho is right about Chelsea bias but Sky hasn’t a clue

Joe Mourinho, Chelsea’s egotistical, talented and erudite manager, feels his side are the victims of a conspiracy to defraud them of the Premier League title. He says that to compound poor decisions that go against them, Chelsea don’t get a fair press.

Sat on the Sky Sports sofas, Mourinho pointed the finger at Sky (prop. R Murdoch). He asked them why if a red card-worthy foul by Chelsea’s Diego Costa was a “crime”, a bad foul on a Chelsea player by Burnley striker Ashley Barnes was brushed over?

And as if to prove the point that the Press is unfair to Chelsea, the Sun (prop. R Murdoch) reports on Mourinho ‘s reasoned remarks thus:




A “33 minute rant”. No. It wasn’t. It was bit whinny, a tad self-indulgent, a little monocular and self-serving (what of Chelsea defender Gary Cahill’s dive in the box against Hull city, or Cesc Fabregas’ handball in the box against Arsenal – both unpunished?), but it was not a rant.

And it was entertaining. It would have been much more saw had Mourinho not been sat by the face of corporate telly, Ben Shepherd, a man whose presenting skills appear to have been honed at a call centre briefing for new staff, and the witless and shouty Chris Kamara, a figure possessed by the ability to retell what viwers have just seen in the manner of an amazed puppy seeing a shoe for the first time.

We’d have preferred to see Mourinho sat before Manuel Pelligrini or another of his rivals and a Premier League referee. A good journalist to wrangle them would be an added bonus. It would look a lot like this:





Posted: 23rd, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Paul Pogba gets a Chelsea salute, Manchester United buy an old Ronaldo and Arsenal get mentioned

TRANSFER Balls: a look at newspaper repoting on footballers. And what utter rot it is. Today the Daily Express says that Chelsea have received a “boost” in their pursuit of Paul Pogba, Manchester United’s “Ronaldo REVELATION” and Arsenal’s “Immobile blow”.


Manchester Untied Paul Pogba

Charles Perrin has three scoops in one day! Hold that Pulitzer Prize!

Dealing with each sensation in turn:

SCOOP! The Chelsea Pogba “boost” is that – and this is fantastic – that dangerously thick sod Nicholas Anelka “admitted he would like to see him join Chelsea”.

Is Anelka setting the transfer policy at Chelsea? Does he know Roman Ambramovich is a Jew? Has the world gone mad?

SCOOP! “Manchester United turned down the chance to re-sign Cristiano Ronaldo last month.”

Is that because United were reluctant to spend £200m or some other nutzoid sum to make Real Madrid sell the player who isn’t for sale and is happy at Champions’ League favourite Real?

Perrin writes:

“…reports in Spain suggest when Louis van Gaal was offered the chance to sign Ronaldo, he said ‘no’ to a potential deal.”

That report notes that United would have to pay a world record fee for Ronaldo, who is an ageing hero and gold mine; and the Madrilenos want to buy Spanish David de Gea.

SCOOP! “Arsenal and Liverpool have been dealt a blow in their pursuit of Ciro Immobil”

Number of words from anyone at Arsenal and Liveprool: nil.

Says Imobile:

“I feel I’m at the right level to play with Borussia Dortmund.”

Number of times Imobile mentions Arsenal or Liveprool in his interview in Italy: nil.

Apart from that it was all true…


Posted: 21st, February 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Chelsea in Paris and UKIP: how one stupid moment blew up Josh Parsons life

As he rode the Paris Metro for Chelsea FC’s Champions’ League match, Josh Parsons, 21, was just one of the fans on a night out. Then it happened. A black man named Souleymane S tried to board the train. A few Chelsea fans blocked his path. A few Chelsea fans sang “We’re racist and that’s the way we  like it.” This small moment was captured on camera. The mainstream media picked up the video. And very quickly the shaven-headed and white the fans quickly became the eptiome of racism.

David Cameron said it was “extremely disturbing and very worrying”. In his mind, a nasty moment between a handful of people demanded language more apt for an ISIS snuff movie. Feelings were hurt. Idiots had been caught behaving sadly. But the elite in Westminster and what used to be Fleet Street wanted more. They held the video up as being a sign of much greater ills. And once again football – the great meriticratic melting pot watched by scum fans – was in the dock.

The great moralisers could now bind the nation behind a common enemy. The Chelsea boot boys had heaped shame upon us all. Lessons must be learned. Hang the fact that no-one was physically hurt, that real racism pervades society not from the bottom up, but from the top down: count the number of black faces editing national newspapers; sat on the front benches in Parliament; captaining industry; running the police; owning football clubs or race horses; riding race horses; owning land; dining with the Dons at Oxford; and, well, you name it.

The elite like their racists white, preferably working class and always obvious.

David Cameron should not lamabaste the Chelsea goons – he should write them thank you letters.

And in the centre of this State-led mob justice is Josh Parsons. He could not have realised that his choice to ride that carriage would have an impact on his life. But it soon did.


Josh Parsons



The Sun led with a picture of Parsons. He wasn’t pictured chanting, shoving or doing anything other than looking. Alongside the photo of him on the Metro, the Sun thought it wise to feature a thumbnail of Parsons open-mouthed – as if chanting – and apparently shirtless. What a hooligan, eh. But Josh Parsons wasn’t undresed or behaving like that on the Paris Metro.

But never mind the facts. The Sun had its target.

And we can have Parsons.

Josh Parsons

In the race to condemn even the most basic of facts is confused

Parsons, we are told, lives in Dorking, Surrey. (The Times shows us photo of his home.) He is an ex-public schoolboy. On Page 5, the Sun says that the “VILE CHELSEA  RACE YOBS” are the subject of an “international hunt”, you know like the White Widow or jihadis are.

And this is because, in the words of the man who filmed the fracas, Chelsea fans were “getting quite agressive”.  Mitchell McCoy, who was on the carriage, says the man barred from boarding by the bouncers-on-tour was wearing a PSG scarf, the colours of the club Chelsea were playing. The chant, of course, suggests more sinister motives at play.



Cheslea fans PAris Metro

We then get more on Parsons. He is a “City high-flyer”. He studied at “30,000-a-year” Millfield school. He works for the Business and Commercial Club in  Mayfair. And in case you still can’t find him, the Sun says that Mayfair is in Central London.

Grab your torches! Saddle up! Let’s roll!






And it gets worse.

One day on and the Daily Star leads with Josh Parsons. Three Chelsea fans have been suspended from watching football at Stamford Bridge, Chelsea’s ground. Parsons isn’t one of them.

And then it gets really odd. The Star tells readers:

“Meanwhile, seson ticket holder Josh Parsons, 21, one of those filmed, is a UKIP supporter who enjoyed a pint with Nigel Farage”.

The Star likes UKIP and its leader, or “UKIP NIGE”, as they dub him. (The Star once supported the EDL.)

Inside the paper, we hear from Parsons’ boss, Miranda Khadr:

“He is very scared and he called me to say he is not coming in today.”

It’s worth pausing to note that Josh Parsons has commited no crime. In a hideous twisting of facts and prejudices, the story of a man barred from riding the Paris Metro has become the story of a man too scared to leave his house. Who needs a Twitter mob when you have the Press to monster you?

And he is being monstered.

The Guardian makes a declaration in the manner of a lawyer revealing his most damning piece of evidence to the jury:

Chelsea fan in Paris Métro video posed in picture with Nigel Farage

To the righteous, that’s enough to bury him.

A mere nine paragraphs into its diatribe, the Guardian thinks it fair to note:

Wearing a black hooded jacket, Parsons can be seen in the Paris video after those around him appear to have chanted: “We’re racist, we’re racist and that’s the way we like it.” It is unclear from the video whether Parsons was among those chanting or remonstrating with a black commuter, who had been earlier pushed from a carriage.

The Times leads with that picture of Josh Parsons and Farage. The word “racism” hangs like dripping poison beneath the photo.





This time, Farage is no “Nige”. He’s the face of Channel 4’s dire docudrama UKIP: The First 100 Days, the show that imagined what the country would be like if UKIP won the Election. For those of you who missed it, the upshot is that life would be awful. It would like living in a carriage with Chelsea fans.

And with that Parsons is no longer a football fan on the train, he’s a chimera of UKIP’s middle-class, petit-bourgeois supporters and knuckle-dragging white racists. He’s the embodiment of everything we are told to fear and despise. He ticks every box.

White: Yes.

Football fan: Yes.

UKIP supporter: Yes.

Male: Yes

Been seen with a St George flag: Yes.

Josh Parsons has become something less than human, a vulgar symbol of everrything the bien pensant love to hate.

 (Not too long ago a Labour MP was lambasted for mocking men who wave the England flag. Not now.)





The Times picks up its sledgehammer to crack the bad egg. With no proof Parsons has broken a law, the Times investigates his mind. It says Parsons was “banned from playing in a football match when he attended the £30,00-a-year Millfield School in Somerset for after sending an allegedly racist tweet about a black referee.”

Did he? It doesn’t matter.

Like anyone sane, we realise that if the sins of the teenage berk are to used to explain the man, well, we could all be shafted.

We’re told that Parsons “smashed plates” when Chelsea lost a match. He and his brother – get this – Beno (!) “left you with no illusions looking at their social meda that they were  a) Chelsea fans and b) UKIP supporters.”

Last time we looked neither hobby was illegal.

But it might as well be. Because alongside a picture of Parsons and news that he is being “probed” by his employers, we hear Souleymane (who says he was on his way home) say “LOCK ‘EM UP.”






We also note that the victim says, “No other  passengers defended me, but what could anyone do? When the train left I waited for the next train.”

What could Parsons have done?

You might be now be wondering what Josh Parsons did to becomes public enemy Number 1 and live in fear?

And the simple asnwer is nothing. The more complex answer is that he offended the knowing and right-thinking, who look around for offence as a way of explaining themselves, seeking a salve to their own vanities and a mirror to show that how they live and the decisions they make are the right ones.

If you want to spot real, censorious, bigoted scumbags. There you go.

Posted: 20th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Key Posts, News, Sports | Comments (6) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Talking balls: Benedikt Howede’s goal is not to play for Arsenal, Chelsea, Manchester United or any English team

Transfer Balls – Anorak’s look at bilge being presented as football fact in the mainstream media. The Mirror has beeb rpeorting on Schalke and Germany defender Benedikt Howedes, 26. A target for Arsenal, Manchester United and Chelsea, the Mirror says his “goal” is to play in England.

The Mirror says he “admits it”, as if it were a secret or a crime:


Screen shot 2015-02-19 at 20.31.11



But is it his goal?


He told German’s BILD:

“If I am to leave Schalke one day, I do not want to move clubs within Bundesliga. The club is too close to my heart to do so. I owe Schalke a lot, I have had a great experience during my time here. I really like being at Schalke.”

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Posted: 19th, February 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

David Cameron and the elite should thank the Chelsea racists for their Paris show

A man has been barred from riding the Paris Metro by a gaggle of Cheslea fans. The episode is caught on video. The Chelsea fans are white. The man trying to board the train is black. Some Chelsea fans sing about being racist and enjoying it.

And – kaboom! – a small, nasty incident in a foreign city becomes a huge deal. The elite wade in.

The Sun leads with the news:


Chesleaf ans Metro



On Page 5, readers are ordered to “FIND PIGS OF PARIS”. The Sun says “an international hunt” is under way for the dicks who sang “We’re racist and that’s the way we like it” and giving full throat to the refrain “Where were you in World War 2?”

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Posted: 19th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Key Posts, News, Politicians, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Chelsea fans celebrate their racism on Paris Metro (video)

Chelsea fans racism paris


Chelsea fans have been a caught on camera doing their bit for race relations in Paris. In France for Chelsea’s Champions’ League match with PSG, a few fans thought it an idea to stop a black man from baording the train.

And it appears that the man’s skin tones are part of the Chelsea fans’ attitude, as they chant “We’re racist, we’re racist and that’s the way we like it.”

Stamford Bridge, which nowadays captures the atmosphere of a local library at closing time, was once a vociferous place. The far-right made it a favoured stomping ground. The Bridge could be an intimidating venue for black players.

Are these Chelsea fans of old now all living in France?


Posted: 18th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer balls: Pail Pogba ‘snubs’ Manchester United, stays at Juventus, thrives at Real Madrid and plays for Chelsea

TRANSFER Balls: Today the Daily Express has news on Paul Pogba. Or, rather, it has no news. But that dons’t stop the Express from making a report.

The paper’s  headline announces:

Pogba to Chelsea, Man Utd’s Gundogan move, Spurs in £20m swoop

James Dickenson backs up the story of Pogba’s move to Chelsea with this:

Nicolas Anelka has urged Paul Pogba to leave Juventus for Chelsea.

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Posted: 18th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Chelsea Balls: David Luiz reveals why David Luiz left Chelsea with David Luiz

The Sun has been talking with Chelsea’s former Playstation character* and footballer David Luiz. In readiness for his current club, PSG, Champions’ League match with Chelsea, Luiz has been talking about himself.

(*Sky TV pundit Gary Neville said Luiz moved as if controlled by a sugar-rushing adolescent with his thumb pressed on ‘run’. Luiz was not in full control of his brain, legs or hair. It was not meant as praise.)

PSG, perhaps taking Luiz’s Playstation reputation as a sign the Brazilian could deliver the fabled 10-15-year-old replica kit demographic, paid a ridiculous £50m for his services. Luiz tells the Sun the move was of his design:

“I decided to leave after the end of the season. Chelsea offered me a new contract and I said to them ‘I’m not feeling the same thing like I was feeling years ago’… I decided my cycle was finished and I wanted to live a different moment now in my life. I was not playing as much as the previous season but I played all the big games well — in different positions.”

Sometimes in one match.

“People tried to make stories about me and Mourinho but we never had any history. He was the boss and decided who plays and who doesn’t. But many times when he doesn’t put David Luiz in people said there was a problem. But it was natural. I was very happy in Chelsea.”

David Luiz talks of David Luiz in the third person, still unsure if the footballer is a player or an object, an avatar controlled by another’s hand.

Anyhow, the story goes that Luiz (sorry, David Luiz; his name must alway be written and said in full (see: Andros Townsend)) wanted to leave. And Chelsea wanted him to stay. Or it would fact be were it not for the nutzoid £5om on the table, the chance for Chelsea to buy better players and what Luiz says of Jose Mouinho’s reaction to his transfer request:

“I was not feeling good there and I said I wanted to leave. He didn’t try too much because I was in Brazil for the World Cup and we just spoke on the telephone. And he said ‘It’s OK, you can go’.”

It’s not Playstation. It’s Player Manager…


Posted: 16th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The Daily Mail’s got it in for Chelsea

Does the Daily Mail have problem with Cheslea FC?

Yesterday the paper led with a question: did Chelsea’s Branislav Ivanovic bite Everton’s James McCarthy. The paper provided some pictorial evidence to help readers best answer:


Branislav Ivanovic bites


No. There was no bite. Only the Mail suggested there had been. The Mail also said Ivanovic had “throttled” McCarthy and possibly headbutted him.

But he didn’t do either of those things, either.

And the Mail, rather than deferring to the FA’s panel of experts (three former referees), calls it a “CHOKE” and states that Ivanocic choked McCarthy, which he didn’t. There was no “throttling”, either.




The Mail’s Neil Ashton uses this as evidence that Chelsea manager “Jose Mourinho has got rivals and game’s rulers on the run…” The Mail declares:” TIME TO STOP JOSE MADNESS.”

There can be little doubt that Mourinho is an irritant. Graceless is victory and snide in defeat, Mourinho cultivates an us-against-the-world philosophy. The professional and low-profile Ivanovic shares nothing of his talented manager’s bitchiness. Conflating the two – seeking punishment for the amiable Serb because the chippy Portuguese has gets up their nose – goes against the rules of fair play.

The Mail omits to mention that Everton provided no evidence of that “bite”.


Chelsea Ivanovic Jose



Meanwhile, over in the Times, there is other news: “Chelsea face more FA woe after scuffle with Everton.”


Chelsea ban


So. About that Mail news on how Chelsea get away with it. They don’t.


Posted: 13th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Talking Balls: the ‘family rift’ that unites Manchester City and Chelsea fans

Football Balls: a look at football journalism in the mainstream Press.

The Daily Mail’s Joe Bernstein looks at the Premier League match between Stoke City and Manchester City. The Citizens won 4-1. Stoke’s goal was scored by Peter Crouch. In his “MATCH ZONE” column, Bernstein writes:

“Crouch Gem Causes Family Rift”


Mourinho Crouch



The story is that Peter Crouch’s mother is a “stuanch Manchester City supportter who is very keen to see them overhaul Chelsea in the title race”.

This is given as the reason she’d have enjoyed Crouch’s goal that tied the scores at 1-1.

The headline-making “FAMILY RIFT” is because “Crouch’s father Bruce is a lifelong fan” of Chelsea  – “so would have been firmly behind his son.” It’s more of a bond.

So. That rift is because both Peter Crouch’s parents love it when he scores. So, er, no rift at all, then.

Such are the facts in the Mail‘s MATCH ZONE.


Posted: 12th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Manchester City, Sports | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Chelsea FC Balls: Branislav Ivanovic smooches Everton’s James McCarthy

The Daily Mail sinks its sloppy jaws into Chelsea and Everton with a story on Branislav Ivanovic ‘biting’ James McCarthy…


Branislav Ivanovic bites

What dock?


Last night Chelsea beat Everton 1-0 in the Premier League. So. Chelsea stay top of the table. And Everton are becalmed in its middle. And that’s it. Unless you’re the Daily Mail and keen to made a controversy from nothing much at all. The Mail’s sports section leads with a question: ”


‘He’ is Branislav Ivanovic, the Chelsea player once nibbled by Luis Suarez. It was the day the Mail says “rocked the football world”. It really was that entertaining. How we loved it.

‘Him’ is Everton’s James McCarthy.

And the answer is , no’. There was no bite. We know that because even the Mail’s photo shows no bite. It was more of a kiss.


Branislav Ivanovic everton


Such are the facts…


Posted: 12th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Chelsea and Liverpool star Daniel Alves signs for Manchester United, Manchester City and Arsenal

Transfer Balls: a look at football rumour and speculation being presented as fact in the mainstresm media. Today the Sun says “MANCHESTER UNITED can have Barcelona star Dani Alves for FREE — if they offer him a three-year deal.”

The Sun says Alves, 31, wants a new three-year £100,000-a-week Barcalona contract. If that fails to materialise, he’ll go to Manchester City or Manchester United for no transfer fee if they can match his wage demands.

In other news, Yahoo! reported on May 14 that “Dani Alves has already signed a pre-contract agreement with Paris Saint-Germain”.

The Daily Express says Alves has agreed to join Manchester United:


Daniel Alves Manchester United


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Posted: 8th, February 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Chelsea get Paul Pogba in a six-wallet race

TRANSFER Balls: The Transfer Window is over but the Daily Express continues to talk upo Paul Pogba. Today’s news is that the Juventus and France player is heading to Chelsea. And the fee? It’s £80m.


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That’s one big Chelsea “move”. But why would they bid now? Well, this is Transfer Balls and the news is that there is no news. Chelsea have made no move for Pogba. So. Wher does thei £80 move come from? The Express ploughs on:

Chelsea could have to fork out an astonishing £80million to land Juventus star Paul Pogba.


The Blues are preparing a summer swoop for the France midfielder but had hoped to pay around £40m for his services. But Pogba’s agent Mino Raiola has revealed there is plenty of interest in the 21-year-old, who he expects to cost more than £80m Cristiano Ronaldo.

What the agent hopes leads to a second Daily Express story:


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Yeah. Only six.


THE agent of Paul Pogba claims that there are six teams interested in signing the Chelsea, Manchester United and Manchester City target, and that his client’s transfer will shatter Cristiano Ronaldo’s £80million move to Real Madrid in 2013.


Posted: 7th, February 2015 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Marco Reus wants Chelsea, gets Arsenal, loves Manchester United and signs for Real Madrid

Transfer Balls: The Daily Express says:

Arsenal leading Man Utd and Chelsea in race for Marco Reus

Which clubs are in the chase?

ARSENAL are leading Manchester United and Chelsea in the race to sign Borussia Dortmund’s Marco Reus.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 31st, January 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Chelsea sign Barcelona fan Cuadrado from Manchester United

Transfer Balls: Juan Cuadrado is soon-to-be a Chelsea player.

As the Daily Star reports:

Chelsea AGREE contract with £26.8m Manchester United target Juan Cuadrado

Not too long ago Cuadrado was a Manchester United player, according to the papers.

The Daily Mail reported:


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Posted: 30th, January 2015 | In: Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Chelsea sell Andre Schurrle to Dortmund for £3m less than Wolfsburg signed him for

Transfer Balls: Yesterday the Daily Express reported that Chelsea had sold Andre Schurrle to Dortmund for £27m.

The Daily Telegraph reported that Cheslea want more than £25m for Scurrle

The Daily Mirror reported: “Chelsea’s Andre Schurrle to snub Wolfsburg and hold out for Borussia Dortmund switch”

The Daily Mail: “Andre Schurrle is set to leave Chelsea for £30m, but who else have the Blues cashed in big on over the past few years?”

And today’s news:

The Times: “Chelsea agreed the £23m sale of Andre Schurrle to Wolfsburg last night”

Such are the facts…


Posted: 30th, January 2015 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Andre Schurrle leaves Chelsea as Reus gets his head checked at Arsenal and Manchester United

Transfer Balls: a look at football rumour, speculation and made-up bilge being presented as fact by the mainstream media.

The Daily Express has news to quicken the pulses of Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool and Manchester United fans:

Andre Schurrle’s £27m Dortmund move will see Chelsea land Cuadrado AND Reus head to exit

Got that? To prove that that unintelligible line is not an Anorak typo, here it is:


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You can try and break the headline down: Schurrle’s off to Dortmund. Cuadrado is off to Chelsea. “AND Reus head to exit”.

Or maybe: Chelsea land Cuadrado AND Reus. And Express reders are advised “Head to exit”?

The next line is simple balls:

BORUSSIA DORTMUND’S move for Andre Schurrle will enable Chelsea to close a deal for Juan Cuadrado this month and could pave the way for Marco Reus to join Manchester United, Arsenal or Liverpool.

It could. Or it could not. Because a few days ago, the Daily Express reported that Reus was having a medical to join Real Madrid:


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As for Andre Schurrle, well, the Telegraph says today Chelsea want too much for him:

Andre Schurrle has asked Chelsea to lower their asking price for him as he attempts to clinch a move back to Germany before the transfer window shuts.
Chelsea have everything in place to sign Fiorentina’s Juan Cuadrado as a replacement for Schurrle, but have so far been holding out for more than £25million for the German World Cup winner.

Wolfsburg officials travelled to London last week to hold talks over Schurrle, while Borussia Dortmund have shown a strong interest in the forward. But neither club are yet to meet Chelsea’s asking price.

So. £25m is too much. Or as the Daily Mail says, also today: Schurrle has gone for…£30m.


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Such are the facts…


will enable Chelsea to close a deal for Juan Cuadrado this month and could pave the way for Marco Reus to join Manchester United, Arsenal or Liverpool.

Posted: 29th, January 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Paul Pogba is off to Arsenal If Chelsea, Manchester United, Liverpool and PSG don’t want him

Transfer Balls: it’s the Daily Paul Pogba. let’s see what utter balls the mainstream media is reporting on Pogba, the Juventus player.

Today, Ben Jefferson tells Daily Express readers:

Juve to let Paul Pogba LEAVE for Chelsea, Man Utd or Arsenal after move for Axel Witsel

So. Pogba is off to the Premier League. But where to?

United and Chelsea have been joined by Arsenal in the hunt for Pogba…

We know this because the Express says it’s so. But there are no quotes, sources or facts to support the statement.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 29th, January 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Chelsea v Liverpool Balls: Relive the Diego Costa stamp collection in gifs

Did Chelsea striker Diego Costa deliberately stamp on Liverpool’s Emre Can and Reds’ defender Martin Skrtel in a fast and furious Capital One Cup semi-final ?

You’d think referee Michel Oliver would have spotted one of the foot misplacements. But he and his hapless refereeing team missed it all.

Oliver missed the stampings (one more and Costa gets a free coffee); Strkel’s foul on Costa in the penalty box; Lucas’ foul on Matic, which should have resulted in his second yellow card of the game; Laza Markovich’s WWF-style foul on Felipe Luis; Jordan Henderson’s foul, which should have been his second yellow card of the night; and the antics of pop-up Chelsea’s assistant Rui Faria, a man who appears to have sat upon a wasabi enema.

And, you know what? Yeah, it was great entertainment.



Putitng it in persepctive, here’s a video of Glasgow Rangers’ Graeme Souness dirtying his socks on Steaua Bucharest’s Gheorghe Rotariu in the 1988 European Cup. Ity was a “definite yellow” in 1988. And there were no howls of outrage in the Press nor trial by TV:


Posted: 28th, January 2015 | In: Chelsea, Liverpool, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Transfer Balls: Arsenal get Paul Pogba for £35m less than Manchester United, Chelsea and Man City will pay

Transfer Balls: It’s the Daily Paul Porba, in association with the Daily Mirror, which declares:

Man United, Chelsea AND Man City to battle for Paul Pogba’s £75million signature this summer

Simon Mullock says Pogba’s got a nickname, too: “the 100million euro man.” It’s not quite Smudger, Pyscho or The Beast, but never mind the quality, cop a load of the money:

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That’s a lot of money. And it’s a los more than the Mirror said Pogba was leaving Juventus for waaaaay back in December 2014:


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That story was from the Daily Mail:

Manchester City are plotting a huge £40m move for Juventus midfielder Paul Pogba. Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger is also keen on the former Manchester United youngster, but would struggle to match City’s financial firepower in a bidding war. (Daily Mail)

But now it’s £75m for the same player! What brought about this meteroric rise in his value? Is Pogba’s fee linked the price of a London studio flat?

Manchester United, Chelsea and Manchester City will join a £75million race to land Paul Pogba this summer. Juventus are ready to cash in on one of the hottest young prospects in world football – and Pogba has already been dubbed “the 100million euro man” in Italy. That will spark a battle between the richest club’s in Europe, with Real Madrid, Paris St-Germain and Bayern Munich set to go head-to-head with the Premier League trio for the Frenchman.

All the usual suspects want Paul Pogba. It will be a bidding war. At the last moment Real Madrid or Barcelona will step in. It’s gonna be huge.

The Mirror continues:

Pogba is on course to win his third Serie A title and his agent, Mino Raiola, is preparing the ground for his summer auction.

This story is rooted in what the agent says. Might he be a tad biased, issuing a comment more loaded than George Bush at a frat house party?

He said: “Paul is happy at Juventus but later this year or next year we will see what opportunities have been created. When the league cannot satisfy such a player then it is time to go.”

The £75m figure has no source. And news of a bidding battle comes from the player’s agent.

Such are the facts…

Posted: 25th, January 2015 | In: Chelsea, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0