Anorak

Sports

Sports Category

Sports news, commentary and scores with wit and added value. We compare and contrast the best and worst sports reporting in the mainstream press, blogs, TV and online. We love the English Premier League (Arsenal, Liverpool, Spurs, Manchester United and Manchester City) and all things football but we cover cricket, rugby, the Olympics, tennis, golf, F1 and highlights of the sporting year.

Video: Steven Gerrard Spits On Hand He Offers Switzerland Captain Frei?

STEVEN Gerrard leads England out against Switzerland tonight, and that means a chance to shake the hand of Alexander Frei, the Swiss skipper who once spat on the Liverpool captain.

But will Gerrard do a Wayne Bridge and dodge Frei’s hand. Will he spit on it first and then shake? Or will the Gerrard ignore Frei, as others have ignored Gerrard? Here are three videos showing you how not to execute the meeting of hands:

The Joker

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 7th, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


In Photos: The ReD Foxes Dancing Girls Banned From The World Basketball Championships

THE ReD Foxes Dance Team have been banned from the FIBA World basketball Championship 2010, being held in Turkey. They are banned because their outfits are deem “too provocative” and could “insult the participants from the Muslim countries”.

Yes, readers, red-blooded, testosterone-raddled professional athletes – whose job is putting a ball into a net – will be insulted by the sight of fit dancing girls warming up the crowd. Because you are not pro basketball players (we’d done a survey and that is just a vest you’re wearing), here are pictures of the true stars of the show…

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 7th, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


In Photos: England Football Team Train With Guns (Wayne Rooney’s Super-Injunction Fails)

WAYNE Rooney is in the mire following claims that he broke his prostitute drought with Jennifer Thompson. As Rooney trains in Switzerland, England Under 21 manager Manager Stuart Pearce took the first-team wannabes on a tour of the 16 Air Assault Brigade and Colchester Garrison, Colchester. As Ollie says:

Drill sergeant Stuart Pearce seemed to be taking it very seriously, but then if you’ve been in the military like wot I have, you’ll know that you never point a gun at anyone, EVEN IN JEST!”

Unless the super-injunction fails, in which case a gun might be your only chance…

9412258

Image 1 of 9

England Under 21 manager Manager Stuart Pearce looks through a rifle during a tour of 16 Air Assault Brigade and Colchester Garrison, Colchester.

Posted: 6th, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


In Photos: Women’s Rugby World Cup Final Not For Faint Hearted

ENGLAND lost the NE IRB Women’s Rugby World Cup 2010 to New Zealand in match at the Twickenham Stoop.

The game ended 13-10. For long periods the team were tied at 10-10. But Kiwi pragmatism and skill saw them home.

The pictures from the match are here. Men who say the women’s game is for the weaker sex should look away now…

9412455

Image 1 of 11

England's Charlotte Barras is floored by New Zealand's Casey Robertson during the Final at Twickenham Stoop, London.

Posted: 6th, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Tabloids Kept Jennifer Thompson Waiting All Summer For Her Rooney Sex ‘n’ Tell (Photos)

WAYNE Rooney’s alleged extra-martial sex with prostitute Jennifer Thompson was presented as the Sunday Mirror’s scoop. It was an “exclusive“.

But the News of The World said it was their story. It was even bigger than  the the most sensational sporting scandal ever” – that story about Pakistani cricketers allegedly pocketing the kind of cash in a betting scam that Wayne spends on ciggies.

Wayne Rooney’s Women In Words And NSFW Photos

The fact is these papers both went with the same story that most hacks had heard rumours of for months. And the tabloids waited til after the World Cup and the summer holidays to nail England’s top player.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 6th, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


Dan Hampton Says Minnesota Vikings Should Hit New Orleans Like Katrina – Rodney Marsh Might Nod

DAN Hampton, star of TV’s Pro Football Weeklysays the Minnesota Vikings need to go down there and hit that town like Katrina“. Rodney Marsh might well nod in sympathy.

The former Fulham and Manchester City player was sacked by Sky Sports for making saying on air that David Beckham had turned down a move to Newcastle United because of trouble with the “Toon Army in Asia“.

Hampton:



Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 6th, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


How Jennifer Thompson And Wayne Rooney Shafted The Pakistan Cricket Scandal

ALL day long Sky News has been leading with news of the Pakistan cricket fix allegations. But “The most sensational sporting scandal ever” has been utterly overtaken by news that prostitute Jennifer Thompson says she was shagging Manchester United footballer Wayne Rooney while his wife Coleen was carrying their child.

Pakistan batsman Yasir Hameed does his bit to keep cricket on the front page as he tells the News of the World:

“They were doing it (fixing) in almost every match. God knows what they were up to. Scotland Yard was after them for ages. It makes me angry because I’m playing my best and they are trying to lose. Only the ones that get caught are branded crooks.

“They were doing it (fixing) in almost every match. God knows what they were up to. Scotland Yard was after them for ages.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 5th, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Photos Of Wayne Rooney’s Alleged Prostitute Lover Jenny Thompson

WAYNE Rooney cheated on Coleen Rooney with 21-year-old Jenny Thompson, aka Jennifer Thompson, a prostitute, allegedly. So says the News of The World on its front page, its follow up story on Pakistani cricket – billed as the most sensational sporting scandal ever”. – relegated by a footballer’s alleged shags.

The allegation is that Rooney shagged the brass when Coleen was pregnant with their first child, Kai. The Mirror says Rooney stopped seeing her in October 2009. Kai was born in the following November.

This story has been a rumour throughout the summer, served up by gossiping hacks to explain Rooney’s lacklustre performances in the South Africa World Cup. Rooney has form, having been linked to prostitutes Charlotte Glover, Gina McCarrick and Auld Slapper, a grandma of 48.

Says Jenny:

“Wayne chased me with sex texts and paid in wads of cash. He didn’t seem to care he was betraying Coleen.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 5th, September 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (9)


Pakistan Players Learn That In England Cricket Is A Minority Sport (Photos)

THE Pakistan cricket scandal is not really all that big of a deal because: a) cricket is a minority sport; b) anyone who bets on the next ball being a foul or not deserves all they get; c) for cricket watchers the sport is often little more than a distraction from the contents of the daily newspaper and what your wife packed in the cold bag.

Should Pakistan’s Butt, Asia and Amir go free and the matter of alleged betting fixes swept under the rug, there will a few opinion pieces, a bit of tutting and then everyone will get on with the match.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 4th, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Ban The England Football Supporters’ Band: Join Our Facebook Group

ANORAK.co.uk says lets snuff out the so-called England supporters’ band that weeps out the music of lost causes and expects the lads in the replica tops to join in in a celebration of an American actor jumping a fence on a motorbike.

JOIN US!!!!

It is egotism, not idealism, that drives them, which is why they will happily offer their services to anything from a church fête to a Gary Glitter convention.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 4th, September 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (6)


Our Photos Of England Thrashing Bulgaria 4-0 Do Not Have Audio

ENGLAND beat Bulgaria 4-0 and we took photos. England fans are noticeable for two things: the supporters who like to take the piss out of Wayne Rooney’s looks and hope that by calling him Shrek it will make him play better (see stuffed toys); and the inability for anyone to snuff out the so-called England supporters’ band that weeps out the music of lost causes and expects the lads in the replica tops to join in in a celebration of an American actor jumping a  fence on a motorbike.

Please someone get a Shrek toy and ram it hard into the small end of anyone holding a musical instrument…

Here are the pics:

Posted: 3rd, September 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (9)


Video: Taoba Kemmy Assures Us That Women’s Football Can Be Violent

TAOBA Kemmy turns out for FFC Turbine Potsdam, Germany. In a match against FFC Frankfurt in the Bundesliga, Kemmy took a throw in and picked out the face of Kerstin Garefreke.

Garafreke went down like a Cheslea striker in Grosvernor House.

Elizabeth Lambert is watching.

Posted: 3rd, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comments (3)


In Photos And Video: Fight At US Open Is ‘Disagreement Over Verbiage’

IN photos: A fight breaks out between tennis fans at the US Open at New York’s Flushing Meadow. A match between Serbia’s Novak Djokovic and Germany’s Philipp Petzschner was interrupted as the fans brawled.

The story goes that the woman was not pleased with a fellow spectator’s swearing. She has standards. She slaps the man, allegedly. He reacts. The woman’s father wades in.

FIGHT!

U.S. Tennis Association spokesman Chris Widmaier calls it a “disagreement over verbiage”.

The three are escorted from the Arthur Ashe stadium. And everyone gets on the serious business of watching a ball go back and forth over a net…

9404116

Image 1 of 4

A fight between tennis fans breaks out in the stands and interrupts play between Serbia's Novak Djokovic and Germany's Philipp Petzschner during day four of the US Open, at Flushing Meadows, New York, USA.

Video:

Posted: 3rd, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Pakistan Cricketers Butt, Asif And Amir Arrive In London

PAKISTAN’S Mohammad Amir, Salman Butt and Mohammad Asif arrived at the Pakistan High Commission in London today.

Team manager Yawar Saeed said the three will not play against England in one-day matches: “I decided to leave them out. They’ve not been suspended.”

Meanwhile, at the Pakistani London HQ, rumours of diplomatic upset that the country’s Treasury was not in the alleged scam are thought to be wide of the mark. Very wide.

Says one source:

Anyone want to bet we won’t find Osama bin Laden by Christmas and that he’ll be wearing the Arsenal home kit, beige chinos and petting a monkey called Gary? No chance, right. It’s easy money. Come, on… Place your bets!”

Posted: 2nd, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Swiss Young Boys Turn Backs On Wankdorf Stadium

THE brief run of Swiss team ‘Young Boys’ in the Champions League has finally finished off the Wankdorf stadium.

The Association of Master Headline writers has complained to the Swiss authorities that having a team called Young Boys at Wankdorf had made many of their members redundant.

They have agreed to change the name of the stadium to Stade de Suisse but Young Boys will soldier on – Anorak Reader Yampster

Posted: 2nd, September 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Did Bengals’ Cheerleader Sue The Wrong Dirty Website Over Sex Lies?

SARAH Jones has won $11million in damages from Thedirt.com, a site run by Dirty World Entertainment Recordings. Or is it The Dirty.com?

Jones, a teacher at Dixie Heights High School and cheerleader with the Cincinnati Bengals, was upset when pictures of her featured on the site TheDirty.com to illustrate the allegations that she had venereal disease and had had sex with Bengal football players, including Bengal’s kicker Shayne Graham. Jones was named as Sarah J.

The website sought to unsure itself with a disclaimer:

“Postings may contain erroneous or inaccurate information. All images are credited to their original location. The owner of this site does not ensure the accuracy of any content presented on TheDirty.com.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 2nd, September 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment (1)


Why Didn’t Bloodgate Doctor Wendy Chapman Gouge Out Williams’ Eyes, Ask Puzzled Rugby Fans?

WENDY Chapman, the doctor who inflicted an injury to Harlequins’ Rugby player Tom Williams in a brazen act of cheating is free to practise medicine.

The General Medical Council (GMC) says her fitness to practise is unimpaired by her actions in cutting Williams’ lip to make it look as if he had been injured – he had bitten on a blood capsule retrieved from his sock and having been removed from the field of play – making way for an expert place kicker – wanted to look like her had been damaged.

Chapman got the slicer and cut his lip. Quins went on to lose the match to Leinster 6-5.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 31st, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Kim Kardashian Look-alike Takes Top Billing In Alleged Brandon Spikes Porn Tape

IS that Brandon Spikes, of the New England Patriots linebacker having sexy times with a Kim Kardashian look-alike in a Chatroulette interaction?

The film was originally offered for sale for a mere $1500. WorldStarHipHop bought it. What they paid is said, but if you like grainy videos of not overly attar give men and someone who looks like someone then it’s all to the good.

And it is not pleasant viewing, a true eye–closer of a porn flick. The golden rule of celebrity porn tapes is that the exposed star is a woman. So, while the headline says Spikes, the true star in the Kardashian look-alike.

We expect to hear more of her soon…

Posted: 31st, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Pakistan Cricket Scandal’s Ex Factor As Sexy Veena Malik Testifies Against Asif

WITH a bright light shone on cricket amid allegations that members of the Pakistan team cheated and tricked idiots stupid enough to gamble on the toss of ball, we meet Veena Malik actress and former lover to Mohammad Asif, who tells us:

“When Pakistan started losing in Australia, I jokingly said, ‘For God’s sake, win a match.’ To this he replied, ‘We won’t win anything until 2010.’”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 31st, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


What Is Pakistan’s Mohammad Amir Carrying From London to Taunton?

WHAT is Pakistan’s Mohammad Amir carrying on the team bus as it journeys from London to the team’s next hotel in Taunton, Somerset?

And what are the odds that he’s going to drop it..?

Posted: 30th, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


Is Pakistan ‘Cheat’ Mohammad Amir Damned By His Accuracy?

HERE are some photos of the Pakistan team leaving their hotel in London’s Swiss Cottage. Mazhar Majeed, who boasted of a betting scam involving some of Pakistan’s players, has been bailed without charge following his arrest by Scotland Yard.

The scam centres on no balls – the alleged fixer said three no balls would be delivered on schedule. At the stated times, there were indeed three no balls: two to Amir and one to Asif.

And a look at the score card – not the race card – shows that one of the accused Mohammad Asif bowled 29 overs at the England blades – that’s 174 balls – and only 2 no balls.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 30th, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Arsenal’s Jack Wilshere Upstaged By Mohammad Amir As Fight Caught On CCTV

POOR Jack Wilshere. On a slower news day, the teenaged Arsenal and England player’s alleged involvement in a fracas outside London’s Amika night club would have been the biggest sports story. But, then, cricket took over.

The brawl even took place yards from the Daily Mail’s offices. Images were captured on the paper’s CCTV cameras. But Wilshere does not feature in the paper until Page 5, after a picture of Cliff Richard’s naked chest and more news on Mohammad Amir, aka Mohammad Aamer.

Better, perhaps, had Jack announced his arrival in the England squad by more salacious mean than being at the “wrong place at the wrong time”, perhaps by spit-roasting a glamour mod-el or stamping on a Portuguese?

As it is Jack has to make do with being only a small mention on two front pages (Star and Sun).

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 30th, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Pakistan’s Amir Snubbed At Lord’s Awards Ceremony (Photos)

MR Mohammad Amir, Mr Mohammad Asif and Pakistan’s captain Salman Butt have had their mobile phones confiscated by police. If any of them have been texting a shag or a pepperoni deep-pan pizza now’s the time to ‘fess up.

After the alleged “rigged” match at Lord’s, Amir received the Pakistan man of the series award from ECB chairman Giles Clarke. There was no eye contact. Mr Clarks did not extend a hand (nor fist). Amir slunk up, his face hidden beneath a generous baseball cap to get his cheque. He does not speak. He does  to use the moment to scream his innocence.

Later, Pakistan’s team manager Yawar Saeed tells one and all:

“No allegations are true til they are proved.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 29th, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comment


Pakistan Are Not Cricket Cheats Just Victims Of Racism (Photos And Video)

PAKISTAN are not cricket’s cheats – they are victims of racism. Before Imran Khan’s views on the matter – and you may care to recall Hansie Cronje, the SAMAA reports (via Tim Blair):

Pakistan Cricket’s Match-Fixing Scandal Is A Good Story With Few Facts

Image: Mohammad Amir’s impressive no-ball.

Australia’s extraordinary victory in the Second Test in Sydney earlier this year was rigged as cricket insiders admit Pakistan intentionally lost the match.

Thousands of cricket fans watched Australia dramatically come from behind to win the January match held at the SCG.

But an undercover investigation today revealed the Pakistan team made AUS$1.4million from rigging the result.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 29th, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Joey Barton’s Abused Groin Introduces Premier League Photos Of The Week

THE Top Ten pictures of the Premier League were going to be brought to you by Dimitar Berbatov, Manchester United’s elegant striker whose movements and skill hark back to a bygone era, but then Newcastle United’s Joey Barton took a few kicks and knocks in the groin area – and we thought you might like to see them more…

9375923

Image 1 of 10

Wolverhampton Wanderers' Karl Henry (left) and Newcastle United's Joey Barton battle for the ball

Also featured: Arsenal, Blackburn, Tottenham, Wigan, Wolves, Fulham, West Ham United, Chelsea and Blackpool…

Posted: 29th, August 2010 | In: Sports | Comment