Anorak

Sports | Anorak - Part 225

Sports Category

Sports news, commentary and scores with wit and added value. We compare and contrast the best and worst sports reporting in the mainstream press, blogs, TV and online. We love the English Premier League (Arsenal, Liverpool, Spurs, Manchester United and Manchester City) and all things football but we cover cricket, rugby, the Olympics, tennis, golf, F1 and highlights of the sporting year.

Sports Illustrated Airbrushed Out Danica Patrick’s Tattoo

AND not just any model. The esteemed sports magazine, whose annual swimsuit issue just came out Stateside, has been rumbled for airbrushing out a skanky back tattoo belonging to foxy racing driver Danica Patrick (see before-and-after photo, right).

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Posted: 21st, February 2009 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (8)


NBA mascot scores with a little help from his friend

PRIOR to the NBA celebrity All-Star game last week, Rufus, the mascot for the Charlotte Bobcats, tossed a basketball over his head. It flew into the basket, but only thanks to an assist by the groin of Bango, the Milwaukee Bucks’ mascot.  Bango also flew – well, fell – into the basket, injuring his knee in the process. Bango will require knee surgery. Hey, we didn’t say there was a happy ending.

Watch the highly amusing incident after the click…

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Posted: 20th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


Man Utd starlet dropped for cocky goal celebration

SIR Alex Ferguson dropped Danny Welbeck into the reserves after the young forward celebrated a goal by striking an arrogant pose.

Fergie was reportedly infuriated by the teenager’s Eric Cantona-esque goal celebration in Sunday’s FA Cup win at Derby County. The Man Utd boss dropped Welbeck from United’s first-team squad, instead making him play for the reserves at Wigan.

A United source said: “Alex was very angry about the way Welbeck celebrated his goal at Derby. He felt there was a touch of arrogance about it. Danny is just a kid and Alex does not like the thought of him getting too big for his boots.”

Watch Welbeck’s goal + celebration below:

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Posted: 20th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


VIDEO: Huge brawl kicks off at high-school basketball game

AH, screw the basketball, let’s fight. A dozen kids were arrested for their roles in this near-riot that broke out during a high-school basketball game in Alabama. Watch the action after the jump…

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Posted: 19th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


F1 to get first female driver since 1992?

DANICA Patrick is the most attractive professional racing driver in the world – as her latest shoot for Sports Illustrated shows – and as such she is a hugely marketable sportswoman.

So it’s no surprise that F1’s next team, the American USF1 outfit which plans to race from 2010, has offered Patrick a test drive.

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Posted: 19th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Russian footballer slams British food

SPURS striker Roman Pavlyuchenko has moaned about the standard of British cuisine. Coming from a Russian, that’s a bit rich.

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Posted: 19th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Manchester City’s Robinho Imports Used Condoms

ROBINHO, Manchester City’s tame Brazilian, is taking delivery of a job lot of sand.

The Sun says the sand is to feature in the grounds of Robinho’s Cheshire mansion.

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Posted: 19th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


Allen Standford In Hiding At Cricket County Championship Match

ALLEN Standford is missing.

The man who made a four into a ten and a six into a Home Run Smack Down! is missing.

The Texan billionaire who bankrolled the cricket fiasco in the Caribbean – the cricket fan who hates test cricket – is wanted in connection with an alleged £5.6billion fraud.

Allen Standford is not where the authorities thought he was. So he is “missing”.

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Posted: 19th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


The Best Jumbotron Film Ever, At The Boston Celtics

YOU’RE at the sports ground. The camera whirls. Give us a wave! And there you are on the jumbotron, a finger stuffed up your nose, ruining the shot of the young blonde woman.

At the Boston Celtics:

Posted: 18th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


Richie Benaud throws last shrimp on barbie

SAD news for all fans of cricket. Richie Benaud, the undisputed voice of the game, has announced he’s retiring from TV commentating after almost 50 years at the mic. Boo.

Anorak was brought up on Benaud’s shrewd, wry observations. He was the perfect antidote to the very English chuminess of Blowers, Johnners and co.

As a tribute to the great man, we’ve unearthed a few Benaud-related YouTube vids for you to enjoy…

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Posted: 18th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Football world amazed by six-year-old genius

FOOTBALL people who know about such things are wetting their pants over Madin Mohammed (not literally), a six-year old prodigy who plays like a mini version of Zinedine Zidane.

Madin, who hails from Algeria but now lives in France (like Zidane, in fact) is being closely watched (stalked?) by some of Europe’s biggest clubs, including Chelski and Real Madrid.

Check out an unbelievable video of Madin in action below…

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Posted: 18th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


VIDEO: Basketball fan overcelebrates

CAN you celebrate too much? Yes, you can, as this enthusiastic young b-ball fan proves…

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Posted: 17th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


Sport-a-likes: Paul Daniels and Debbie McGee v David Beckham and Posh


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Posted: 17th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


Top 10 sport-related thefts

IN the light of the news that some wag nicked Lance Armstrong’s bike this week, Anorak presents the Top 10 sport-related thefts (in no particular order):

10. Lance Armstrong’s bike, 2009
Armstrong himself reported via Twitter that his unique black-and-gold bike had been stolen from a team truck that was parked in an alley behind a Sacramento hotel. Armstrong posted a photo of the bike on his Twitter feed and wrote: “There is only one like it in the world therefore hard to pawn it off.”

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Posted: 17th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


Ex-model banned from boxing

A former model who wanted to become the first female boxer to represent Great Britain Team GB at the Olympic Games has been barred from the ring because she has silicon implants in her fun bags.

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Posted: 16th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


VIDEO: Italian ref knocked out by thunder shot

SOMETIMES Italian football is not so dull… during Sunday’s 1-1 draw between Lazio and Torino, ref Massimiliano Saccani was knocked out by a fierce strike by Lazio defender Aleksandar Kolarov. However, after a quick waft of smelling salts, and perhaps a face full of magic sponge, Saccani was able to continue with his duties as the ‘short-sighted bastard in the black’. Marvellous.

Watch the video below…

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Posted: 16th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


Finally, a plane you can have sex with

THE Interweb is ablaze with photos from this year’s Swimsuit Issue of Sports Illustrated (it’s not sexist, it’s a tradition, m’kay).

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Posted: 16th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comments (3)


FAIL: Football fan falls asleep in a bad place

THERE’S no bed more comfortable, more secure, more cosy, more appropriate than a ledge. Oh wait…

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Posted: 12th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


David Beckham v Bobby Moore

LAST night in Seville, David Beckham equalled Bobby Moore’s record of 108 England caps (not including keepers).

It’s a fine achievement by Becks, and one that inevitably promps the comparisons between Goldenballs and the late, great Moore.

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Posted: 12th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comments (6)


Top 10 Fernando Torres adverts

WHEN Fernando Torres is not scoring goals for Liverpool (something he’s not done enough of this season), he loves nothing more than to spend a relaxing day in a studio, making TV commercials. He’ll sell anything, will Nando. Here’s ten of his finest moments as a corporate ho…

Tennis club

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Posted: 12th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


The most excitable football commentator in the world

MEET Carlo Zampa, Italian journalist and football commentator. Carlo loves AS Roma so much that when they score a goal, he goes a little bit mental.

Here’s a sample of Zampa in overdrive, taken from Roma’s 3-0 win over Genoa on Sunday:

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Posted: 11th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


Chelsea Reveal Guus Hiddink Pay Deal

GUUS Hiddink for Chelsea. Forward with Guus.Go Guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuus

Guus is the new Ruud. “Give me a u”…

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Posted: 11th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


Tony Adams sacked at son’s birthday party

TONY Adams got the boot from Portsmouth while making balloon animals at his son’s birthday party (we might have made up the bit about balloon animals).

Tone took the phone call from Pompey chief executive Peter Storrie while celebrating with his five-year-old son, Atticus (real name).

We imagine it went something like this…

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Posted: 11th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


Freddie Flintoff’s Caribbean cruise

THE Current Bun is aghast to discover that Andrew Flintoff and best bud Steve Harmison (how is that man still an international cricketer?) went on a luxury booze cruise only ‘hours’ after England’s humiliating defeat to the West Indies in the First Test at Sabina Park.

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Posted: 11th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment


Drugs cheat: I wish I’d lied earlier

BRITISH sprinter Dwain Chambers says he wishes he had continued to lie about using banned steroids. His justification for such a stance? Poor Dwain feels that he has not been forgiven since he owned up.

Damn honesty and its unfortunate consequences. (As Homer Simpson might say.)

Chambers made the bizarre admission during a radio interview with Victoria Derbyshire (the most patronising and annoying woman in the world, fact fans) on BBC Five Live.

Anorak often hears people say that drug cheats deserve forgiveness and a second chance, but using banned substances is rarely a one-off error of judgment – it’s a concerted, pre-meditated effort to cheat the system, rather than a lone lapse. So does Dwain deserve more sympathy. No, in a word.

Watch Chambers tie another noose for himself below:

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Posted: 10th, February 2009 | In: Sports | Comment