AS Fifa’s Swiss president Sepp Blatter continues his mission to shake hands with everyone black and thereby cure the world of racism, we take a look at Harry Redknapp’s words in the Sun. The Spurs manager pretty much sums up the British position on this story by saying that things would be better were Blatter one of us:
“Not everyone likes Michel Platini but at least everyone appreciates he knows his stuff about football. He was a great player so the people who pay to go through the turnstiles accept he knows what he is talking about. Maybe if Blatter had been like Bobby Charlton or a great manager like Sir Alex Ferguson you would have more respect for his opinion.”
Yep. Were Blatter British and not Swiss – 99% of Swiss think shaking hands with a black man is a stop too far – we’d respect his opinion that racism does not exist.
HOW’S Arsenal’s young Polish goalkeeper Wojciech Szczesny settling into the role? Well, he’s been trying to use Twitter to woo aspiring glamour model Letesha Collins, who can be seen performing for the cameras on late-night phone-a-w*** channel Elite TV.
Add to this the reported fact that Szczesny has a girlfriend and the lad’s on track to be Premier League stalwart.
Better yet, Letesha told the keeper’s lover (and the rest of Twitter) all about Szczesny’s bothed seduction. She took a screenshot of the Pole’s private message and posted it with the caption:
“[Follow] @13Szczesny13 or just give him a call, clearly isn’t too fussed about giving his number out. Have a good FRIDAYYYY.”
THE Puskas Award 2011 is a grand name for “Goal of the Year’. The contenders are:
1. Benjamin de Ceulaer, LOKEREN vs Club Brugge
“Blatter dismissed racism as a problem on the football field, arguing that any such incident should be settled with a handshake at the end of the game.”
Blatter has to go. Just has to. As he said:
“‘I would deny it. There is no racism, there is maybe one of the players towards another, he has a word or a gesture which is not the correct one, but also the one who is affected by that… He should say that this is a game. We are in a game, and at the end of the game, we shake hands, and this can happen…And on the field of play sometimes you say something that is not very correct, but then at the end of the game, the game is over and you have the next game where you can behave better.”
Mail readers may also care to take view on Steve Doughty, who wrote
“Things may not be perfect but, at the end of the day, Gary, there are worse things to complain about. So, Mr Evra and Mr Ferdinand, I know you feel insulted. But perhaps in this case you could just put up with it and get on with the game.”
Bail videos – if you’re not down with the parlance, they’re the reels that show them busting their heads and ramming their genitals on rails and the like – are THE best thing about skateboarding.
And what’s better than someone hurting themselves by accident? Someone hurting themselves via collective stupidity of course!
JOHN TERY Race Row: The investigation into the Chelsea captain’s language towards QPR’s Anton Ferdinand has not been concluded. Terry says he used the words “f**king black c***” but without racial intent. We’ve seen no new evidence. We’ve only seen one out of context clip of Terry talking. It would be unwise to prejudice the case – unless you’re the Daily Mirror and decide to lead with:
“Police want Terry charged”
So. Why has Terry not been charged, then? And what is the “new twist” the Mirror announces?
Well, the new twist does not exist. David Collins reports:
POLICE say there is enough proof to charge England captain John Terry over his alleged racist rant.
CZECH porn star Klarisa Leone and Inter Milan fan (leading orifice in such straight-to-tissues classics as of Don’t Tell My Wife I’m Banging My Secretary, MILF Masturbation Nation 11 and Joachim’s Czech F**k Fest) is to found Inter Prague FC. The lads will turn out in blue and black stripes, just like the Nerazzurri.
“I’ve loved my career in porn but I’ve always dreamed of owning a football club and that would give me an even bigger buzz. I’m sure my porn fans will be just as keen on my team. There are lots of women in football these days.”
He was a loyal friend who felt the pain of others as acutely as only the highly intelligent do.
Tim Blair is cutting:
That’s why Roebuck caned teenage boys, presumably. Because he was so intelligent.
JONES IS ALREADY A LEGEND. HE’S UP THERE WITH BARESI AND HIERRO SAYS CAPELLO.
Phil Jones, the 19-year-old with three England caps is as good as AC Milan great Franco Baresi (82 caps for Italy; three European Cups) and Real Madrid’s Fernando Hierro (89 caps for Spain; three European Cups)? Read the rest of this entry »
Read the rest of this entry »
SEPP Blatter, the Fifa President, says there is no racism in football. Sepp Blatter says victims of racism should just shake the hand of their abuser and stop complaining. He then clarifies his views with a Fifa in press release illustrated by this picture (see left). Anorak is not sure what went on before the handshake but imagines it might have involved fertile and crude racial abuse of a type that should be left in the Fifa boardroom, a place where normal rules of decency and law no longer apply.
Says Sepp, the white nigger:
I would like to make it very clear, I am committed to the fight against racism and any type of discrimination in football and in society. I have been personally leading this battle against racism in football, which FIFA has been fighting against throughout the past years through campaigns in all of our competitions such as the “Say no to racism” campaign.
The FA statement reads as follows:
“The FA has today charged Liverpool’s Luis Suarez following an incident that occurred during the Liverpool versus Manchester United fixture at Anfield on 15 October 2011. It is alleged that Suarez used abusive and/or insulting words and/or behaviour towards Manchester United’s Patrice Evra contrary to FA rules. It is further alleged that this included a reference to the ethnic origin and/or colour and/or race of Patrice Evra. The FA will issue no further comment at this time.”
The alleged word is “nigger”. What do we know of that word?
Suarez says he is innocent. So. what will happen? Well, Fifa wonk Sepp Blatter has a view.
THE Balotelli Zone is where Manchester City’s Mario Balotelli lives. He is as good at football as he is mental as he is likeable. Who else is in the zone? Eric Cantona? But did anyone outside Manchester United’s walls like him? Stan Bowles? Zinedine Zidane? Paul Gascoigne?
SIGNS that Graham Taylor is Alan Partridge: The former Watford, Aston Villa and England manager tells BBC Radio 5 live listeners tuning into England v Sweden:
“This strikes me very much as a friendly international.”
There are international friendlies and there are friendly internationals. Discuss…
“I do not know if Bale interests us,” Rosell told Al Jazeera. “If I did, I would not say, because his price would go up. [Tottenham] would not ask for €40million [£33.2m], but €50m [£42.8m]. In any case, even if we wanted him, we would never pay €40m for him.”
IAN Dowie, former manager of Oldham Athletic, Crystal Palace, Charlton Athletic, Coventry City, Queens Park Rangers, Newcastle United and Hull City - the Ian Dowie who holds an M.Eng Degree in Engineering from the University of Hertfordshire – tells viewers of Sky Sports:
“Trapattoni will not pay too much lack of respect to Estonia.”
FOOTBALL figurine of the Day: a ceramic figurine of Real Madrid and Spain’s Sergio Ramos ding a poo. The object d’art is a ‘Caganers’ (a symbol of fertilization, hope and prosperity for the coming year) are traditional Christmas fare in Catalonia, dating back to the 18th century.
Says Chris at Pies:
Catalonians hide the shitty widgets in their Nativity scenes and invite friends to find them. Kind of like ‘Where’s Wally?’, but with turds.
PETER Roebuck committed suicide. The Somerset cricketer who became a journalist “dived six floors to his death from a South African hotel room after he was questioned by police over an alleged sexual assault against a young man he met on Facebook“.
So says the Times, using the word “dived” to add drama to a story that need no embellishment.
The man who says he went to room 623 of the Southern Sun Newlands Hotel is aged 26. He is Zimbabwean.
South African newspaper, The New Age, quoted a source as saying that Mr Roebuck allegedly tried to seduce the Facebook friend and to have sex with him against his will. Police say they confronted Mr Roebuck at about 9pm on Saturday with the intention of making an arrest.
The praise for Roebuck has ben fluid. But this is an open investigation. In 2001, Roebuck was given a suspended jail sentence after pleading guilty to common assault against three 19-year-old South African men whom he had put up in his Somerset home while coaching them. Roebuck had caned them for what he claimed was slackness.
Judge Graham Hume Jones told Roebuck at his trial that his action had been “inappropriate”. He said: “It seems so unusual that it must have been done to satisfy some need in you. You used your position to abuse these boys and humiliate them.”
Roebuck was sentenced to four months in jail for each count, with the sentences suspended for two years, at Taunton Crown Court.
But he could write…
It was just after 9 o’clock on Saturday night when Roebuck, 55, rang [ABC commentator Jim] Maxwell – who was also staying on the sixth floor of the Southern Sun Hotel, Newlands – to ask him to hurry to his room.
On arrival, Maxwell found two policemen and Roebuck stunned by news that a 26-year-old Zimbabwean man had accused him of sexual assault.
Peter Lalor adds:
Maxwell, a friend of Roebuck for more than 30 years, found him in a distressed state asking if he could contact his student friends and a lawyer.
The police asked Maxwell to leave the room. “I asked the detective if he could give me his phone number so I could speak with him later and he followed me into the hall,” Maxwell told The Australian last night. “That left him (Roebuck) with just one person and I think that is when he jumped.”
Maxwell went down the corridor to fellow ABC commentator Drew Morphett’s room and they heard the detective speaking on the phone saying “there is a complication” and “jumped out the window, I think he is dead”.
The Sun loads the words against Roebuck:
Bachelor Roebuck, 55, arranged to meet the handsome 26-year-old from a poor Zimbabwean family after making an online offer to help him through university.
But the unidentified victim called cops, claiming he was cornered and sexually assaulted at a hotel in Cape Town, South Africa.
Saturday’s assault was said to be so serious he requested counselling. A source close to the case said: “The young man is not gay and is not a sex worker. He needs money to go to university. He contacted Roebuck after a friend said he might sponsor him. But he said Roebuck pounced on him. It has left him traumatised. He got away but was so shocked it took days for his girlfriend to talk him into going to the police. Roebuck was about to be arrested when he jumped from the window.”
The New Age reports:
But when The New Age queried an indecent assault charge laid at Claremont police station and spoke to Capt Malusi Mgxwathi on Sunday, Mgxwathi said: “This is the same man who committed suicide at the hotel.”
The New Age source – who on Sunday spoke on condition of anonymity – said Roebuck jumped to his death when he was informed that a complaint of a sexual nature had been made against him by a friend whom he met on Facebook.
Roebuck 55, who arrived in Cape Town from Pietermaritzburg earlier last week, allegedly met the 26-year-old male a few days ago.
The pair later met at the hotel, where they were allegedly meant to discuss a possible university sponsorship for the male Zimbabwean.
The New Age source said Roebuck allegedly tried to seduce the Facebook friend and have sex with him against his will.
The man reportedly went to Claremont police station and laid charges of indecent assault against Roebuck. When police confronted Roebuck in his hotel at about 9pm on Saturday, with the intention of effecting an arrest, the British man allegedly asked to be allowed to change his clothes. In the process he managed to move close to a window and jumped out.
SHOCK. Bewilderment. Grief. These were just some of the emotions palpable in the sprawling student digs Peter Roebuck had set up for students who said he was like a dad to them and who had given them hope when, in most cases, there had been none. The house close to the University of KwaZulu-Natal Pietermaritzburg campus in the suburb of Scottsville was where Roebuck spent six months of each year. ”When he was here, we would eat meals together. He would spend time with us together and he would regularly speak to us separately,” said Dennis Chadya, 24. ’Peter touched lives on a grand magnitude,” said Prosper Tsvanhu, on a cricketing scholarship at the university – thanks to Roebuck.
”I was playing in Zimbabwe but nobody wanted to play with us. My coach recommended me to Peter. He managed to organise the cricketing scholarship for me at the university and has been helping me with food and accommodation. Peter gave in many ways. He was a mentor. A father figure. He seemed to have this moral compass and moral obligation to assist others. He was concerned about everyone’s well-being. He was terribly concerned about the situation in Zimbabwe and felt people must not just complain. They should do something. That is what he was doing. He touched so many lives.”
Neil Manthorp knew Roebuck (do read it all):
I first met him when he was still playing first-class cricket and our paths crossed in press boxes and commentary boxes on a regular basis for the next 23 years.
For a long time, like many of his colleagues both on and off the field, I was intimidated by his eccentricities. We naturally fear or avoid what we don’t understand – human instinct. But I didn’t avoid conversation, far from it. I just avoided debate on the basis that I didn’t stand a chance and preferred to defer to his vastly superior knowledge.
Then, almost a decade after we first met, he was travelling around South Africa during Australia’s 1997 tour of South Africa looking more and more dishevelled. Nobody ever saw him at the ‘usual’ hotels and he brushed off my queries about his accommodation with a casual “oh, just with friends.”
We had just moved into a house we really could not afford and furniture was not only second hand but sparse. Still, I invited him to stay and he gladly accepted. He wore tracksuit pants the first evening which must have been at least 20 years old and a sleeveless Somerset sweater that was filthy, and smelly. My wife asked, understandably, when it had last been washed. He looked down at his chest and then up to her before replying, nonplussed: “But, it’s a cricket sweater…?” Evidently they were not intended to be washed. That night she put the entire contents of his duffle bag in the washing machine…
We had a new puppy at the time and we were battling to train it. The only decent piece of furniture we had was a beige sofa. The puppy fell in love with it and, if it wasn’t trying to jump on it, it was chewing the legs off it. He sat down on it and the puppy jumped on him. I removed the dog and asked our guest not to encourage it. This request was infinitely more difficult to comprehend than washing a dirty sweater – and impossible to comply with. So the dog stayed. It was a bit like having two dogs, actually. One was only a little bit better house-trained than the other.
One was a stubborn animal with a sense of mischief which seemed to revel in the attention it got from doing something naughty, and the other was a six-month old Ridgeback puppy.
Such are the facts…
JOHN Terry Race Row: The Sun turns the Chelsea captain into Colonel Gaddafi.
Sun (back page): “JT: WORLD BACKS ME – I’ve had support across the planet!”
The Sun does it’s best to make the Chelsea captain appear delusional – football’s answer to Colonel Gaddafi just before his capture.
At yesterday’s England press conference, Terry performed well. It was the first time he had spoken to the press since since the racism allegations aired. An FA wonk acting as Minster for Information prevented journalists from asking questions about the matter. Well, almost, because one did contrive to ask:
“John I’ve known you for years – you’re not a racist are you?”
The question was batted away. And then Terry, sitting uprights and looking directly out, said he loved playing for England. He used to dream about it – “as I am sure everybody in this room did“.
With that Terry had built a bridge between the hacks and the platform. And no-one shouted out:
“But that’s why your behaviour matters, JT. You’re living our dream. You have to behave well, look honest, honourable, trustworthy and decent. Your holding a sharp pin to our thought bubble.”
TO the England team conference at The Grove hotel before the England v Sweden match. All hacks are banned from asking the Chelsea captain about the ongoing investigation into allegations of racism. Terry denies the accusations which are being investigated by the FA and police.
But two journalists contrive to weave the matter into their questions. They will take one for the press pack. They drew the short straws and will ask the questions every journalist in the room wants answered.
The pick of the bunch is, “John I’ve known you for years – you’re not a racist are you?”
The FA’s press officer stops Terry from responding to Nick and Dan’s posers. He wants to talk only about football.
RIP Peter Roebuck? He was 55. The former Somerset captain turned journalist for the Sydney Morning Herald and Melbourne’s The Age has died. He committed suicide by throwing himself from the balcony of a sixth-floor hotel room in Cape Town where he was staying while covering the ongoing Test series between South Africa and Australia.
He had been questioned about an alleged sexual assault. A detective and uniformed officer from Cape Town’s sexual crimes unit spoke to him at around 9pm after he returned to his room in the Southern Sun hotel. Roebuck reportedly became agitated and contacted a journalist about getting legal advice. One report says he jumped while police were still in the room. He landed on the hotel awning.
Colonel Vishnu Naidoo of the South African Police Services
“An inquest can take a long time, it can be anything from six months to two or three years, but what is critical here is to get the autopsy reports, or what we call the post-mortem report. We will be looking at that first and that can take four to six weeks, sometimes up to eight weeks. When we get that report, we can determine officially what his cause of death was. There is no crime suspected as far as Mr Roebuck’s death is concerned. If someone dies of unnatural causes and there isn’t suspicion of a crime being committed, then we conduct an inquest. In this time, we will undertake the normal investigation. We will take statements, we will await medical reports and that will form part of our investigation.”
The facts are not yet known. ButFairfax’s Greg Baum already knows:
He was tormented as only genius can be. The circumstances of his death attest to it.
FILIPINO boxer Manny Pacquiao defeated Mexican Juan Manuel Marquez in Las Vegas. He retains his WBO welterweight title with a decision identical to the pair’s last meeting in 2008. Two judges voted fgotr Pacquiao; one could not split the fighters. The crowd was less uncertain, booing and chucking cans and bottles into the ring,. East of Manila, someone watched the bout whilst sat in giant motorised shoe… We took photos:
Fun fact: at 11.11am on the 11/11/11, South Africa required 111 runs to win the First Test against Australia.
AN American University wants to pick the brains of Britain’s Rugby players. That is … take out and study the brain of Rugby players. It would like to examine the brain tissue of players who had head injuries and later die.
It has to be the Sports Story Scoop of the week …literally.
Left, a Kiwi Haka… rugby players with attitude
The Spurs manager has been charged, along with his former boss at Portsmouth Milan Mandaric, with cheating the public revenue. It is alleged that he accepted two payments totalling around £180,000 from Mandaric when boss at Fratton Park. The payments were allegedly made to a secret Monaco bank account, which, allegedly, had been opened by Redknapp.
Poor old ‘Arry has only just undergone heart surgery and the stress of having to face a criminal prosecution surely won’t do him any good. The trial itself is due to take place at Southwark Crown Court on 23 January 2012.
RICH goings on in Munich, Germany, where F1 action figure Bernie Ecclestone reveals that his ex-wife Slavica invested “in excess of £12 million” on their daughter Petra’s wedding to James Stunt.
He says he and his former beau argued over the £4,000-a-bottle Château Petrus wine, the stuff the wedding guests would sip as they listened to Royal Philharmonic Orchestra and the Black Eyed Peas, ate caviar, calamari, ravioli, lamb chop and chocolate pudding, and pissed away in the luxury toilets hand stitched by British craftsmen.
In a bid to prove that he had not misused the terms of an offshore trust in order to avoid inheritance tax for his aforesaid wife and daughters Petra and handbag collector Tamara Ecclestone, 81-year-old Bernie offered:
“Here’s a little bit of a demonstration of what really happens. My younger daughter got married and I thought as father of the bride I should pay for the wedding. But when it was suggested how much they would be spending on drinks, I thought it was absurd and I managed to upset my daughter and my wife. Then she spent in excess of £12 million on my daughter’s wedding, which I did not know about until afterwards.”