Sports news, commentary and scores with wit and added value. We compare and contrast the best and worst sports reporting in the mainstream press, blogs, TV and online. We love the English Premier League (Arsenal, Liverpool, Spurs, Manchester United and Manchester City) and all things football but we cover cricket, rugby, the Olympics, tennis, golf, F1 and highlights of the sporting year.
HAVING seen the double dunnies at the Sochi Olympics, Canadian snowboarder Sebastien Toutant shares this chart of “Sochi rules in the bathrooms”. So sicking. So squatting. No urinating. No fishing. No taking drugs. No boozing.
Bombing, petting (boy-girl, only), ducking, eating, playing video games, running, washing your feet and diving are all fine.
RUSSIA may hate the gays, but let it not be said that Putin’s people are prudes. I mean, take a look at these side-by-side toilets at the biathlon venue for the Sochi Olympics. The two toilets above were spotted at the cross-country skiing and biathlon center.
Was it a one off?
The twin flushers below were found at the security screening facility outside the Main Press Center.
DAVID Moyes Watch: The current Manchester United manager is having a torrid time. Today his Red Devils lost to mighty Stock City, managed by former Untied player Mark Hughes. The more we looked, the more we noticed that Moyes not only resembles Hugh Laurie; he looks a lot like Thelma Barlow, who played Coronation Street’s soft-centred Mavis Riley and then one of Victoria Wood’s Dinnerladies. Someone get him a tabard:
ARSENAL FC new boy Kim Kallstrom as seen in his 1999 Panini sticker pose:
THE Super Bowl halftime show is a mixed bag. Highlights have included Prince, The Rolling Stones, Chubby Checker (and 88 grand pianos), Michael Jackson, Paul McCartney and Beyonce.
With that, there have been lowlights too. Madonna’s turn at the show was met with stifled yawns, while The Black Eyed Peas performed their songs while everyone in the stadium ran off to the bar.
ALPINE skier Prince Hubertus von Hohenlohe, who turns 55 on February 2nd, qualified to represent Mexico in the 2014 winter Olympics in Sochi but knows that it’s unlikely that he’ll win a medal. Instead, for his sixth and probably last chance to compete in the Olympic games, he is attempting to win big style points. As a way to celebrate Mexican culture, the flamboyant athlete –who is already known for his unique fashion choices– will don a skin-tight mariachi-themed suit as he flies down the hills of Rosa Khutor.
ROBBIE Savage Watch: a look at the world’s favourite pundit. This week, Savage tells BBC viewers “How Spurs can beat Man City”.
We’d hasten to reply ‘Score more goal’, but that might be too trite for a deep thinker of the game, like Savage.
In his regular BBC Sport column, Robbie Savage looks at the tactical decisions which could decide Wednesday’s game between Tottenham Hotspur and Manchester City.
DIEHARD Everton fan Matty Bowman has raised funds for desperately ill George Johnson, 4, by having the Liverpool’s club motto, You’ll Never Walk Alone, tattooed across his back. The deal was that if enough people pledged money for George, Matty would get the ink.
George suffers from a very rare motility condition (which means that he can not eat or drink and survives by being fed through his heart) and desperately needs to travel to a specialised clinic in the US to have his illness diagnosed and treated properly – and, sadly, incredibly expensively.
SPURS Balls: (Sir) Les Ferdinand is talking about his new coaching role to the Tottenham and Wood Green Journal. Says Les:
“I know there’s a lot of talk about holding midfield players, and I’m always arguing with Tim and Chris (Ramsey) about this – and they agree.”
David Coleman is away.
CHELSEA Balls: Happy birthday Jose Mourinho, 51-years young. The journalists were there to see you work on your birthday, taking charge of Chelsea for their FA game with Stoke City.
IN the frantic race to scream “first” with the news of a transfer, Jon Rogers reports that Spurs are in the hint for French striker Jonathan Biabiany. This exclusive includes the following:
The 25-year-old currently plays as a forward or right winger for Serie A side Parma but a move to the north London side could be on the cards, so SportsDirect News understands. Spurs boss Tim Westwood is reportedly keen on bringing some new attacking options to White Hart Lane and it seems the speedy Biabiany could add some zest to Spurs who have lacked the ability to find the net consistently in open play this season.
MANCHESTER United fans and TalkSPORT’s Andrew Ryan took a leaf from Jimmy Kimmel’s joke book and talked with Chelsea fans outside Stamford Bridge about a few of the club’s rumoured January transfer targets. Only, none of the players he mentions exits. He made them up. Hilarity ensures.
Old Chelsea fans who can remember Kerry Dixon’s goalscoring exploits and are now priced out of the ground by the rugby-loving Henrys and American bankers can laugh along.
FANTASTIC haircut news: the bill to cut Kobe Bryan’s hair for a Nike shoot ran to $860.
This is Kobe Bryant:
No. That’s him on the right.
IT looks a lot like Juan Mata – Chelsea’s Player of the season for the past two seasons – is on his way to Manchester United for a club-record fee. Oliver Holt is a Manchester United fan writing for the Daily Mirror. He reaches the kind of audience most fans can only dream of. He says that if Moyes flops at United “No one will remember 11 years of worthy over-achievement at Everton”. Everton fans might.
Failure for Moyes and “he knows that people will come to him, deep into his old age, and ask him about Manchester United, and he will look back in anger.”
THE big news over the Pond today is that Warren Buffett is offering a billion dollar (yes, really, $1,000,000,000) prize about basketball. And the thing is, yes, this is a pretty big prize, but it’s pretty certain that no one’s going to win it. Indeed, it’s set up almost to make sure that no one will.
WHEN Manchester United lost a penalty shoot-out to Sunderland in last night’s League Cup semi-final, we remembered a 2010 article he wrote for the Times:
David Moyes: How to win a penalty shootout
DAVID Moyes is under pressure. The new Manchester United manager has seen his side slip to a home defeat by Sunderland. How did he react? Like this:
Norway’s Curling Team Are Early Leaders In Olympics Fashion Stakes With Their ‘Life-Changing’ Trousers
NORWAY’S Olympic curling team is in fine fettle for the upcoming games in Sochi.
The Norwegians have form:
The designer is Christoffer Svae, who tells the AP that he asked a company called Loudmouth to jazz up the team’s kit:
“It’s definitely been life-changing for us,” Svae told the AP. “Not so much in the everyday but when we travel around the world for curling, it doesn’t always matter if we do well or not, people still think that we win stuff because we are always in the media.”
“I don’t think you’ll see a lot of the other teams do the same that we did,” Svae added, “they feel it’s our thing.”
If you look closely at the new kit, you can see a boy in tricycle riding up the zigzags.
Manchester United Balls: After Mata, United Will Raid Man City, Newcastle, Spours, Everton and Southampton
WHY are Manchester United set to buy Juan Mata from Chelsea? Because Terry Venables told them to. Says Terry Venables in the Sun:
ON Saturday, I urged David Moyes to make a move for Chelsea’s Juan Mata. Now it looks like he has listened to my advice and is ready to clinch a £40million deal for the Spaniard.
Terry now says Untied should buy: Yaya Toure (amn City), Tim Krul, Cheick Tiote, Yohan Cabaye (all Newcastle), Adam Lallana, Jay Rodriguez, Luke Shaw (all Southampton), Phil Jagielka, Leighton Baines (both Everton), Paulinho, Mousa Dembele (both Spurs) Stevan Jovetic away from Manchester City?
MEANWHILE…. At the Australian Open:
GARY Whybrow, 31, of west London, Sam Parsons, 24, of Amersham, and Peter Ditchman, 52, of Bishop’s Stortford, have been arrested and charged with using threatening, abusive or insulting words at football matches. Well, not so much words as a word. That word is “yid”.
The BBC explains it’s meaning to those of you interested in language:
The word, meaning Jew, was allegedly used at Tottenham Hotspur matches against FC Sheriff and West Ham United.
THERE are stop footballers spitting at the match by making it punishable by a fine.
Let’s look at the footballers for whom it was better out than in.
1. El-Hadji Diouf
Sunderland’s new signing is football’s undoubted King of Phlegm. While at Bolton the Senegalese striker was banned, fined and sent to counselling after spitting at Portsmouth’s Arjan de Zeeuw. He was also alleged to have spat at Middlesbrough fans. During his Liverpool days he picked up a fine in court after spitting at a Celtic fan.
2. Frank Rijkaard
ENFIELD Council has sent letters warning football clubs in the north London borough against players spitting. Winchmore Hill FC was once club to have received a letter warning of £500 fines for anyone caught spitting in public - “the bye-law does provide authorised officers with the powers to prosecute those witnessed spitting. Please cascade this information to your players and those of the opposition team to avoid the risk of prosecution.”
The on-the-spot fines business is a bugbear of ours here at Anorak. But we enjoy the use of the words “cascade”, although shower could have been more appropriate.
WHAT do you do when a grown man takes nasty looking fall? This Liverpool supports smiled and reached for his camera. Always good to record any injuries for posterity and insurance claims: