Anorak

Sports | Anorak - Part 41

Sports Category

Sports news, commentary and scores with wit and added value. We compare and contrast the best and worst sports reporting in the mainstream press, blogs, TV and online. We love the English Premier League (Arsenal, Liverpool, Spurs, Manchester United and Manchester City) and all things football but we cover cricket, rugby, the Olympics, tennis, golf, F1 and highlights of the sporting year.

Chelsea balls: Mourinho attacks Arsenal with praise

In “Why I don’t want Arsenal to go through”, the Mirror leads its posts coverage with the words of Chelsea’s manager Jose Mourinho.

 

Arsenal daily mirror

 

Reader can think of any number of reason why the manager of Chelsea wold prefer another London club to fail. But the given reason that “stokes rivalry with Arsenal” is that Mourinho “is mates with Olympiakos coach Marco Silva”.

Says Mourinho:

“I would always like English teams to qualify, first. They [Arsenal] are in a group where a kid friend of mine is the manager of Olympiakos and it would be fantastic for the kid’s career to go through. So I have to be honest and say that I would like the kid and Olympiakos to go on, and we know that Bayern go through for sure.”

And, er, that’s it.But Adrian Kajumba has an entire column to fill with this nonsense, so he ploughs on, using every tabloid trick to eke sensation form the dull:

Jose Mourinho admits he WANTS Olympiakos to dump Arsenal out of the Champions League.

He admits – as in confesses, finally, his innermost secret’s extracted by incisive journalism. He “WANTS” in capital letters because he WANTS it so very badly.

But Kajumba soon tires, leaving the rest of his scoop to Mourinho, whose words “risk riling” Arsenal.

“Even doing a bad group phase – because to lose at home to Olympiakos and to lose in Zagreb and to lose six points they should win is bad – they can qualify. They can qualify. It’s not my problem, it’s their problem, but the reality is first of all they can qualify and secondly if they go into the Europa League then they become favourites [to win it]. So I think they can have success in the Champions League by going to the next round and they can succeed in the Europa League because then they become favourites, so I think they have a lot to play for.”

And so having answered a journalist’s leading question on Arsenal with an easy, even and fact-based answer, the Express reports on “Moutinho’s Arsenal dig”.

Such are the facts.

 

Posted: 26th, November 2015 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: Arsenal send the stretchers for Lars Bender and William Carvalho

Will Arsenal buy a new player in the January transfer window? And will that player take out extra medical insurance? The BBC says Arsenal have “dossiers of holding midfielders” should they need to replace the injured Francois Coquelin.

The Daily Mail says the Gunners have a shortlist of six players: Lars Bender, William Carvalho, Grzegorz Krychowiak, Lucas Biglia, Vincent Koziello and Nampalys Mendy.

Given that Biglia is wanted by Liverpool and Manchester United, and Krychowiak thinks England is “too cold”, that short list is getting shorter,

Perhaps they will hire Genoa winger Diego Perotti, as Calciomercato reports they will?

Ian Wright says this is Arsenal’s important January transfer window for years. 

Every Arsenal fan just shrugs and wonders how so many players can be injured so often.

Posted: 24th, November 2015 | In: Arsenal, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Manchester United balls: the mounting injury crisis gets better fast

Ahead of Manchester United’s Champion’s League tie with PSV, the Independent has news:

Champions League: Manchester United’s injury woes continue to mount for PSV visit

United fans will see that headline. Worry. And click.

They will arrive at the Indy’s website, and we told:

Champions League: Manchester United’s injury woes continue to mount for PSV visit

Yes, yes. And in small print:

There is some hope that Rooney, Martial and Mata will be fit to face PSV

A headline on mounting injury woes turns out to be news that three top players are in line for a return to the fist XI.

Wow.

Posted: 24th, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Ronaldo 99% certain to join Manchester United (and 100% certain not to)

The Independent is so independent of thought its writers contradict each other freely. Sometimes they ever contradict themselves in the space of a few minutes. Today the paper has NINE stories on Real Madrid footballer Cristiano Ronaldo.

David Ward writes:

 

Screen Shot 2015-11-24 at 14.46.13

 

 

Cristiano Ronaldo to Manchester United: Alex Ferguson ‘99% sure’ forward will return to Old Trafford, says Patrice Evra

Writes David Ward:

 

Screen Shot 2015-11-24 at 14.51.11

 

Cristiano Ronaldo to Manchester United: Real Madrid star will not leave Bernabeu, claims agent Jorge Mendes

Those November 24 scoops in full: 100% says Ronaldo stays; 99% says Ronaldo leaves.

Such are the facts in the trusty Independent.

 

Posted: 24th, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Aston Villa: Jack Grealish in hippy horror night out

aston villa jackAston Villa footballer Jack Grealish went out and enjoyed himself his Aston Villa side lost 4-0 to Everton. This leads the Daily Mail’s sports news.

The facts in David Kent’s report are damning:

FACT:

The midfielder is then believed to have gone to Manchester nightclub Panacea with friends

FACTS:

Video footage shows Grealish singing into the camera before champagne and sparklers arrive at table

Jack Grealish is over the minimum age for drinking. He might be too old for sparklers, which are also own as ‘Hippy Central Heating’.

FACT:

Also in the video, it appears ‘hippy crack’ is being taken through balloons by the 20-year-old’s friends

Hippy crack is also known as laughing gas. Actual hippies most likely stick with LSD and ‘shrooms.

To recap: all David Kent knows is that Jack Grealish is in photo.

The story continues:

He then travelled home to Birmingham and hosted a gathering involving two blonde women at the Malmaison in the city centre.

Blondes.

 

There is no suggestion that Grealish was inhaling from balloons or in any other way and he trained on Monday with the rest of Villa’s squad at Bodymoor Heath.

And that’s it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted: 24th, November 2015 | In: Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Manchester United balls: Wayne Rooney is off to play in China?

china wayne rooneyIf this were the 1970s, and we were Benny Hill, we would describe the Sun’s back page exclusive that the Chinese are wooing Wayne Rooney as looney.

As it is the Sun says “Utd fear a takeaway”.

Cue jokes about walls.

As for the story, well, it’s balls. China has lot of TV cash to invest in the sport. Rooney, being a top players, is one name the money men want to attract.

So is he going? No. The Sun adds:

There is no suggestion of an agreement being in place with Rooney but his advisors are considering all options ahead of his next move.

No news, then.

Posted: 23rd, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: Ronaldo to Manchester United and Benitez to Coventry

Ronaldo picking

 

Trouble at Real Madrid. One bruising defeat to Barcelona and Cristiano Ronaldo, 30, says of manager Rafael Benitez: “Either he goes, or I go.” And that means Ronaldo is off to play for Manchester United.

Well, so reports the Daily Telegraph, in an article headlined: “Rafa Benitez heads for Bernabau exit.”

Writer Oliver Brown links to the source of his scoop that Ronaldo picks Real’s manager.

We follow the link, which turns out to be a second Telegraph story.

…given the snake-eye Ronaldo was casting in Rafael Benítez’s direction, one would be foolish to rule out a parting of the ways, even if Real Madrid were far more likely to bin Rafa than sell Ronaldo. Though ‘it is understood’ Florentino Péérez would be prepared to let him leave if United paid them the £80m fee back.

This story makes not a single mention of Ronaldo’s ultimatum.

To recap: Ronaldo never said it’s either him of Benitez; Benitez is not leaving; and the Telegraph is bullshit.com.

 

Posted: 23rd, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: Manchester United get Gareth Bale, Ronaldo and Benitez

bale ballsIn “GALACTIGO”, the Daily Express says Manchester United are poised to sign Cristiano Ronaldo and Gareth Bale. If Real Madrid sell their players, if Manchester United have the money to sign then, if the players want to leave and play at Old Trafford, and if the planets are in alignment, United will get their men.

Bale, says the Express, is not a fans’ favourite at Real. A poll by Marca found “more than 48,000 people thought him the worst player on the pitch” when Real were tonked 4-0 by Barcelona., “closely followed by Ronaldo”.

Really?

Over at Marca, we read “Could Real Madrid have won the game?”

Answer: “Absolutely no chance.”

The paper adds:

Raphaël Varane looked like a nervous schoolboy. Toni Kroos returned to his deeper role, but nobody seemed to notice. He was rendered invisible. And Luka Modric was swept away by Iniesta, whose imposing performance was a finger in the eye for all those who assured that his best days were over early on last season.

No word on Bale and Ronaldo. But a few words on the manager are forthcoming:

Rafa Benítez’s dismissal is not a matter of if, but when. The debacle against Barcelona would seem to have made the decision a foregone conclusion.

And now for the poll facts.

Following Saturday’s disastrous result at the Bernabéu, more than 120,000 MARCA.com readers voted and assigned blame for what happened. Although everyone involved shared in the overall blame, Florentino Pérez was singled out as the person most at fault.

Florentino out!

The Real Madrid president picked up over 42% of the votes as the person most to blame for the crisis at the club following its embarrassing home defeat to Barça.

Pérez came in a long way ahead of Benítez (31.9%) and the players themselves (26%) when assigning blame for the team’s current situation.

And the players?

One of the most interesting things is that the Bernabéu faithful are most disappointed with the club’s big-name stars. Bale, Ronaldo and Benzema are amongst the players that fans blame most for the historic defeat. Them, and Danilo.

The players that fans are least disappointed with are Carvajal, Marcelo, Navas, Modric and James, in that order.

Team loses to arch rivals. Monocular fans turn on big name players, manager and president they hope will make them win, letting off steam in an online poll.

Ronaldo and Bale lead Real to champions’ League glory. All is right with the world. And in the UK, the Express says the biggest culprit are of to Old Trafford. Rafa for United it is, then…

 

Posted: 23rd, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: Liverpool have £42m for Aubameyang, Chelsea offer £20m, Arsenal release Reus

ST GALLEN, SWITZERLAND - JULY 25:  Marco Reus of Dortmund (R) celebrates his team's second goal with team mate Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang during the friendly match between Juventus and Borussia Dortmund on July 25, 2015 in St Gallen, Switzerland.  (Photo by Daniel Kopatsch/Getty Images)

ST GALLEN, SWITZERLAND – JULY 25: Marco Reus of Dortmund (R) celebrates his team’s second goal with team mate Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang during the friendly match between Juventus and Borussia Dortmund on July 25, 2015 in St Gallen, Switzerland. (Photo by Daniel Kopatsch/Getty Images)

 

Transfer balls: News is that Liverpool manager Jürgen Klopp is on course to reunite with Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, the  Borussia Dortmund striker who has scored a mere 19 goals in 16 appearances so far this season.

The Guardian says Arsenal and Barcelona are among clubs to have noticed that Aubameyang is rather tasty, but Liverpool hope the player’s relationship with Klopp, who signed him, will secure a “£42m deal”.

The Sun, however, says Chelsea are leading the hunt, and are”weighing up a £20m bid”.

It all adds up to a lot of guesswork. Like this in the Bleacher Report:

Liverpool are hoping to recruit Borussia Dortmund star Marco Reus, but they will only be able to do so if Arsenal can secure his team-mate, Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, at the same time.

According to Heiko Ostendorp of German outlet Sport Bild (h/t Metro‘sGeorge Bellshaw), the pair “have made a pact to not leave the club unless the other is also leaving” with the Reds targeting Reus and the Gunners eyeing up Aubameyang.

That would be the dame Metro that told its readers:

 

reus signs arsenal

 

Such are the facts.

Posted: 22nd, November 2015 | In: Chelsea, Liverpool, Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer Balls: Manchester United wave £60m at Ronaldo

ronaldo back pages

The Mail, Express and Star all lead with Manchester United’s pursuit of Cristiano Ronaldo.

The Mail says the door is open to a £60m bid for the Real Madrid star. The impetus for a Ronaldo bid is being powered by Louis Van Gaal and media spin. What the United manager said was:

“We are looking at all players, not just Ronaldo. But these players are mostly ungettable. With Ronaldo, let’s wait and hope. There is no trainer in the world that doesn’t like him.”

The figure of £60m is pure speculation by the Mail, which says Ronaldo could only “probably” be transferred to one of three clubs: Chelsea, PSG and Man United.

Posted: 22nd, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Manchester United balls: Schweinsteiger scores as Deeney gets erased

Manchester United beat Watford 1-2 in today;’s Premier League match. The winning goal was scored by… well, who”:

The Manchester Evening News says Man United’s German midfielder scored the winner.

 

Watford v Manchester United LIVE: Bastian Schweinsteiger scores last-minute winner in 2-1 success after Memphis and Deeney goals

 

Bastian Schweinsteiger scores last-minute winner in 2-1 success after Memphis and Deeney goals

The Independent’s live blog agrees:

 

Screen Shot 2015-11-21 at 14.50.52

 

That’s what you get when football writers watch matches via twitter.

The winning goal was an own-goal scored by Watford’s Troy Deeney.

 

Posted: 21st, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Arsenal: Hector Bellerin breaks Usain Bolt’s sprint record (sort of)

usainbolt1

Is Arsenal defender Hector Bellerin faster than Usain Bolt, the world’s greatest 100m runner?

Elizabeth Cassin writes for the BBC:

When Usain Bolt broke the 100m world record in 2009, it took him 4.64 seconds to run the first 40m. But it’s been reported that Arsenal defender Hector Bellerin ran the same distance in 4.41 seconds. So could Bellerin beat Bolt in a race?

Over 40 metres, yes. From a standing start: no.

When he was asked if he would like to run against Usain Bolt, Bellerin replied, “Obviously I would fancy it, but there’s nothing I think I could do. He’s a sprinter, he’s the quickest man in the world.”

Who is the quickest man in football this season (speeds measure during a match)?
fastest footballer premier league
But who is the slowest?

Posted: 21st, November 2015 | In: Arsenal, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Spurs balls: Kane and Alli get pay rise but Manchester United and Chelsea wait

del alli

 

The Sun leads with news that Spurs will invest £25m in tying Dele Alli and Harry Kane to long term deals. The money won’t come in one hit. As the paper says:

Striker Kane, currently on £45,000 a week, is likely to be offered a deal worth £70,000 a week. Alli would double his pay from £12,500 to £25,000 a week.

Good money. Great money for young men doing what they love. But compared to the £300,00o-a-week Wayne Rooney earns at Manchester Untied or the £200,000-a-week Raheem Sterling earns over the same period at Manchester City, not much.

Spurs fans eager for their club to hang onto two bright prospects will not be comforted by the numbers. Any idea that Kane will stay put out of loyalty (the Spurs fans hopeful chant that Harry is “one of our own” is sweet and desperate) is undermined by pictures of the young Harry wearing an Arsenal kit.

As for Alli, he spoke with David Hytner in October:

In his first newspaper interview as a Tottenham Hotspur player, Dele Alli said “unreal” and “surreal” on a number of occasions. Then again, he was speaking after making his first start for the club, in the showpiece friendly against Real Madrid at Bayern Munich’s Allianz Arena, in front of 70,000 fans and, 24 minutes in, he had nutmegged Luka Modric.

Alli said that he and Real’s superstar midfielder had “had a laugh about it in the tunnel afterwards”.

That’s Modric, who used to play for Spurs before a bigger club beckoned him over. He plays with Gareth Bale, who made the same move from White Hart Lane to Madrid. Alli joined Mauricio Pochettino’s Tottenham squad in February 2014 for £5m.

Says Pochettino:

“It is the same situation as with Harry Kane last season. Be careful with the young players that arrive in the Premier League. It is not easy. You can see that Dele is very mature and a player who shows great quality. He has a great personality and good character. But it is too much of a rush to talk about bigger steps for him. Always in football, you need to take it step-by-step, game-by-game.”

Until a big club with vast sums of money comes calling.

Posted: 21st, November 2015 | In: Reviews, Sports, Spurs | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Arsenal balls: fear and panic sell Laurent Koscielny short

wenger fearArsenal could be without Laurent Koscielny for their next Premier League match at West Bromwich Albion. The Sun says in “WENGER’S PARIS FEARS OVER KOSCIELNY” that the Gunner’s French manager Arsene Wenger “fears” the player is “too traumatised by the Paris attacks to play tomorrow”.

That’s the same player who a couple of days after the mass murder in Paris played for France at Wembley.

What Wenger actually said was – and this was him responding to a question:

“I’ll look how deeply they [Koscielny and his France team-mate Olivier Giroud) are affected. You look for resilience and them showing a desire to play… West Brom is a big game for us so I will talk to him [Koscielny] to see if he is completely recovered and focused… If not I will not play him.”

Fair enough. The player is a human being. But there is something crass about inviting speculation on his mental state and yelling “Star traumatised”. If Koscielny is stressed, surely a back-page headline – being elevated to the biggest story in world sport – is not what he needs.

 

Posted: 20th, November 2015 | In: Arsenal, Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: tabloid creates epic bullshit.com story about Liverpool and Arsenal ‘target’

daily star bullshit

 

Transfer balls: The Daily Star has a scoop about a “Liverpool target”. The headline tells us:

Liverpool target talks up shock move: It’d be a dream to play for them!

Who is it?

PARIS ST-GERMAIN winger Ezequiel Lavezzi hinted that he’s open to a move away from the French capital.

“Liverpool”. “Move”. “Dream to play for them”.

Chisanga Malata then writes about Lavezzi’s dream:

…the former Napoli star has talked up a move to the Nou Camp by revealing that it’d be a ‘dream’ to play for Luis Enrique’s side. “I’m not going to deny that it would be a dream to play in a team like that,” he said.

Number of times he mentions Liverpool: nil

Respect the Daily Star has for its reader: nil.

Previously in the Star:

 

daily star football

 

He went nowhere.

 

Posted: 19th, November 2015 | In: Liverpool, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: Chelsea, Manchester United and Bayern Munich in Robben story plot

Transfer balls: Is Arjen Robben heading back to the Premier League to play for Manchester United?

Yes, says the Daily Express. He is. The paper’s headline is definitive:

Former Chelsea winger agrees January move to Manchester United

 

robben balls

 

 

Why wold Robben agree to join Man United now?

Adam Skinner writes:

United manager Louis van Gaal is keen to add some pace to his forward line and Robben is understood to be keen to leave Bayern Munich.

Well, d’uh. He’s agreed to join Manchester United. You told us that, Adam. Not sure how well that will go down with Bayern Munich fans when they watch him play for the German giants before the transfer window opens in January.

Skinner continues:

The Daily Mirror claim the former Chelsea winger is unsettled as a result of the fall-out and is relishing the chance to move back to England for a second crack at the Premier League.

What the Mirror claims is an actual done deal in the Express.

Van Gaal has already expressed his desire to make a marquee signing in the January transfer window and might continue his spending spree after completing a deal for the 31-year-old.

Might? And, Skinner, a marquee is a big tent not a human being.

Having made a statement and then denied it, Skinner adds:

Robben could form one half of a sensational double deal, with Gareth Bale also thought to be at the top of a list of targets.

Could. Thought. Might.

Such are the facts.

Posted: 19th, November 2015 | In: Chelsea, manchester united, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: Darren Raekwon McIntosh-Buffonge gets the Manchester United bullshit.com treatment

Manchester United have agreed terms with 17-year-old Darren Raekwon McIntosh-Buffonge. A mere five years ago, Darren was let go by Arsenal. He then tried his luck at Fulham. And now he’s signed a scholarship contract at Old Trafford.

Bit deal for him. But not a big deal for Arsenal nor Man United – unless you read your news in the Metro, where the move is:

 Done deal: Man United confirm signing of brilliant ex Arsenal midfielder

Good grief.

 

 

Posted: 19th, November 2015 | In: Arsenal, manchester united, Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: Chelsea and Manchester United linked to Spurs Dele Alli

Spurs midfielder Dele Alli played a blinder on his England debt. He tackled, scored a belter and moved well. At just 19, Spurs have a rising star in their ranks.

Ali is good enough for England. He’s good enough for Tottenham. But the Daily Express wonders: is she could enough for Chelsea or Manchester United? Bruce Archer asks the question no-one else is:

 

alli chelsea transfer

 

Spurs sit above dull, money-mad Chelsea in the Premier League table. They are just behind dull, money-mad  Manchester United.

Why leave?

 

Posted: 19th, November 2015 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Manchester United: Louis van Gaal on buying bargains and brain training

Manchester United manager Louis Van Gaal has been talking with the Telegraph:

On his vocation:

Already, when I was a boy, I knew I wanted to be a trainer-coach. I lived near the Ajax training ground and I watched the training sessions. All my friends were looking to the players and I was looking to the coach. It was a big difference.

On self-awareness

I have played at the highest level in the Netherlands, until I was 32. But I was not a top player.
I know that when you analyse yourself, that you cannot be a top player. So, I knew in advance that I shall be maybe a very good trainer-coach.

On making Ajax

We didn’t have any money and we were bankrupt, so I had to look to youth. We scouted [Jari] Litmanen, a Finnish player, who we bought for £10,000. We also bought Finidi George. He was a Nigerian international. He was £3,000. I paid it by myself! And then, we bought Marc Overmars.

On his philosophy

When you see my press conferences, I’m discussing a lot my philosophy. Sometimes, the media is not very proud of it. But, sometimes, they are firmly crazy for it because I explain a lot. It takes always a little bit of time to transfer the message. I’m training in the brain – a lot of things in the brain – because football is not a sport of legs, it is a sport of brain, and tactics. So, that takes a lot of time.

On his job

I’m from a time where you [the manager] did everything. Now I’m the manager and I have a sports science department, I have a scouting department, I have a medical department, I have assistant managers, I have assistant coaches. I don’t do anything – nothing! I delegate. I delegate, and I earn a lot of money.

Read it all.

 

Posted: 18th, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Arsenal balls: Messi to the Emirates for £1 a week

Is Lionel Messi going to play for Arsenal? No. Of course he isn’t. But the ludicrous story is doing the rounds.

It began on Monday, when the Daily Star’s David Woods thundered:

Screen Shot 2015-11-18 at 15.28.48

 

LIONEL MESSI wants a staggering £600,000 a week to play in the Premier League.

Why not make it a £1m a week? why are only Mn United, Cheslea and Arsenal eyeing the world’s best player – why not AFC Bournemouth or Aston Villa, too. After all, they cannot afford him just as much as Chelsea can’t.

The story continues:

The four-time World Footballer of the Year is open to a move to England after falling foul of the tax authorities in Spain.

But the Barcelona superstar’s staggering demands look to have priced him out of the budgets of even big-spending Manchester City, Manchester United, Chelsea and Arsenal.

He had us right up til ‘Arsenal’, which pay less for talent than those other clubs.

The 28-year-old Argentina ace is understood to favour moving to London, with the Gunners his preferred option if he quits Barcelona.

If. He won’t. But three days on from that nonsense the Independent has more news:

 

Lionel Messi to Arsenal: Gunners fans start crowdfund project to pay Barcelona superstar’s reported £600,000-a-week wages

 

Not quite. One Arsenal fan tweeted a joke:

Screen Shot 2015-11-18 at 15.43.36

 

£1 is not enough to buy Messi – but it is enough to make a national newspaper write about it.

 

Posted: 18th, November 2015 | In: Arsenal, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Arsenal balls: ‘getting rid’ of players is easy for laptop managers

Arsenal daily mirror

 

A charming story in the Daily Mirror catches out eye. The paper invites readers to suggest which Arsenal footballer should be put out of work, or at least on a reduced wage:

Arsenal keep or sell: Which players should the Gunners get rid of in the January transfer window?

Perhaps Arsenal players should poll their staff to see if the journalist who dreamt up that hideous feature should be sacked or transferred to a regional title in, say, Belgium?

 

 

Posted: 18th, November 2015 | In: Arsenal, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Manchester United staffer in nominative determinism tribunal

In “Women peep in Utd loos”, the Sun reports on Marcus King, a man who claims that whilst working at Manchester United’s training ground he was spied on by three women. “He told a a tribunal he heard sniggering outside the disabled toilet when he sat on the loo.

The three women he alleges bullied him at work are all called…Sue.

The case of reverse nominative determinism continues.

 

Posted: 18th, November 2015 | In: manchester united, Money, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Transfer balls: Chelsea in for Berahino and agree to meet Sneijder release clause

Chelsea are looking to buy West Brom striker Saido Berahino. The Daily Telegraph says the 22-year-old is valued at £20m.

Chelsea are also hopeful of signing Valencia’s Algeria winger Sofiane Feghouli, 25. Well, so says Fichajes, which has little by way of fact to support the claim.

That’s not all. The trusty Metro says Chelsea are on track to sign Bologna midfielder Amadou Diawara, 18.

The Daily Express claims Chelsea and Valencia are among “the top 15” clubs in the world keen on Lyon’s Belgian striker Michy Batshuayi, 22. Yeah, just the top 15 clubs. Hard cheese on the top 16th club, which, as the player’s agent knows, is AFC Bournemouth.

And to round things up Chelsea will very soon sign Galatasaray’s Wesley Sneijder, 31, Fanatik claims Chelsea will meet the player’s release terms. 

 

Posted: 18th, November 2015 | In: Chelsea, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Arsenal manager wants drug cheats exposed – why bother?

Arsenal manger Arsene Wenger wants more testing for drugs in football. Having already said his Arsenal side have faced sides using performance-enhancing drugs “many times”, Wenger  said yesterday:

“I’m not satisfied with the  level of testing because I believe blood tests should be done….Urine checks are superficial and not deep enough to say absolutely sure that we have no drug problem in football. Can you have 740 players at a World Cup and come out with zero doping? It’s a little bit surprising.”

But why not Let athletes take whatever drugs they want. If the drugs aren’t damaging their health, why not let allow drugs and so ensure all sportsmen are in the know?

And can any drug make a footballer more skilful? Can it sharpen the brain and muscles to good effect, more than adrenalin, caffeine or sugar? Should all steroids be banned – even the ones that aid recovery from injury?

 

 

Posted: 17th, November 2015 | In: Arsenal, Reviews, Sports | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0


England v France: British tabloids sing La Marseillaise in a bikini

It helps, of course, that La Marseillaise is the world’s most sing-alongable national anthem. England football fans can sing it when the Three Lions play Les Blues at Wembley.

The Daily Mirror is here to help everyone who doesn’t have access to the internet learn the lines to the stirring tune:

 

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Other newspapers support the French:

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But the winning newspaper is the Daily Star with its bikinis (traditions French attire) and balls.

 

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Posted: 17th, November 2015 | In: Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0