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Splash News on Michael Jackson’s death - “It’s like the FA Cup final”
Mother Steals Daughter’s ID To Be School Cheerleader
WENDY Brown is a cheerleader at Ashwaubenon High School, Green Bay, Wisconsin.
She’s one of the girls, shooting the breeze about which of the hot new act New Kids On The Block she fancies, chillin’ with Vanilla ice and watching Baywatch.
Wendy Brown is 15. She was born 33 years ago. To Wendy Brown it’s always 1990.
Wendy Brown wanted to be a cheerleader, so she enrolled at a school and passed her self off as her 15-year-old daughter.
Brown is way cool. She scores a cheerleader’s locker, attended a pool party at the cheerleading coach’s house and pretends she is Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, the wicked new movie.
One high school worker, a Kim Demeny, says Brown is not good at maths.
Brown’s fraud is only noticed when the $134.50 cheque she gives to the cheerleading coach for her uniform bounces.
Now rumbled, Brown faces an identity theft charge which could lead to six years in prison and a $10,000 (£5,580) fine.
It’s terrific story, and one that makes Anorak wonder if it is too late for us to return to school, perhaps as captain of the football team, or a sergeant in the Combined Cadet Force..?
Posted: 13th, September 2008 | In: Anorak In New York, Photojournalism, Police Log, Strange But True Comments (11) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
Comments
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September 14th, 2008 at 10:20 am
Life’s a bitch.
Back to the drawing board, eh?
You could probably get away with the transparent eyed bit, at a pinch…
September 14th, 2008 at 7:01 am
Well, there goes the beautiful transparent-eyed half-woman, half duck billed platypus amoral-yet-caring sidekick to my protagonist.
September 13th, 2008 at 8:52 pm
I’m glad you found it; Rex Stout must have been a remarkably brave man to deliver that to the ranks of the faithful.
I think there is gay fanfiction about any character in the known universe; I did wonder whether JKR outing Dumbledore was by way of a riposte to the swarms of eager writers.
I do commend to you the Mary Sue questionaire as an ever present help in time of trouble…
September 13th, 2008 at 8:33 pm
Irene Adler? Please keep your chair. Some search that was. Via the Harvard College Library and into the depth of the ‘net. Thanks, chenier. Now I see there is gay Holmes fanfiction. The literati, eh? Worse than Deviantart regulars.
September 13th, 2008 at 7:47 pm
Gender distinctions abound.
My present favourite is Rex Stout’s speech to the Baker St Irregulars, in which he demonstrated, beyond reasonable doubt, that Dr Watson was in fact a woman…
September 13th, 2008 at 7:38 pm
chenier, all men should be uissued with one at 14, as all girls should be issued with a personal taser.
and bob, you’re right there. I watched heartwarming Bruce Willis flick ‘The Kid’ earlier. Bruce was coaching his 8-year old self on how to win a fight against a bully. He then watched the resulting turnaround of both their fortunes from just beyond the school fence. Outside of celluloid, he’d be in the back of a patrol car in seconds, mumbling “but he’s me!” while the officers flipped a coin to see which would get to beat him senseless first.
September 13th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
If a bloke did that, he’d be facing the far more serious charge of peodophilia because no one would have believed a yarn like Wendy Brown has spun here.
September 13th, 2008 at 7:24 pm
Do people still have briar pipes?
I thought that perhaps men smoking pipes were a vanished breed…
September 13th, 2008 at 7:16 pm
The girl on the left is a man is disguise. Another fraud the school overlooked until his shaving kit and briar pipe fell out of his pocket at a sleepover.
September 13th, 2008 at 7:03 pm
Well I guess the cheerleader on the right pooped her bloomers…look at her back spot’s face
September 13th, 2008 at 6:51 pm
You got the wrong story, Anorak - the girl on the left is not wearing any knickers - that is far more interesting.