Billie Piper’s Rub ‘N’ Tell
“IS Billie Piper’s tummy hiding a little secret?”
There’s a picture on the Express’ front page of Piper in a bikini. That would be enough for any other news day but today there is more: Piper is caressing the gap between bikini top and bikini bottom with her right hand.
Is this a tell, a sign that something is up?
Most people rub their noses when lying we are told, or tug their ear lobe when plotting world domination. Now the Express says rubbing a tummy is a sign of being secretive, of being a little secret keeper, a keeper of little secrets.
The Mail agrees and on its front page asks: “So, Billie… is there a little secret you’d like to share?”
If this were a big secret, Piper would be using her left hand, of course. But it’s her right hand, so the secret may be a little one.
What the secret is the Express can only guess at. It mentions a chance of her being pregnant.
But given the grimace on her face as she takes a dip in a foreign ocean, Anorak imagines it’s the effects of a bad kebab or the early onset of a pancreatic ulcer…
April 24th, 2008 at 12:09 pm
as with many things on these pages
who gives a stuff ?