Soldier Ant: Ant And Dec Fight In Afghanistan
DECLAN Donnelly and Ant McPartlin are in Afghanistan.
While the enemy has boy soldiers, we have soldiers who look like toddlers. The Mirror leads with news that both are under attack.
The tots are in the war zone on the pretext of presenting our squaddies with Daily Mirror Pride of Britain awards, plastic medallions featuring the faces of EastEnders Mitchell brothers and the legend: “REAL NEWS… REAL ENTERTAINMENT, 40p.”
A rocket is fire. It misses Ant ‘n’ Dec being to wail.
The enemy approaches, carrying bits of gun metal fashioned into teddies. And Ant ‘n’ Dec wait to poiunce and ask a jihadi to “show us yer talent”…
What The Daily Mirror Did In The War
Honour The Brave Daily Mirror, With Ross Kemp
Posted: 29th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, War On Terror Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
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September 30th, 2008 at 1:42 am
It’s a secret Maskeline-style plan to lure Osama out of his hideout to appear on a game show. Which (naturally - it is Ant and Dec after all) is rigged. As they pull the curtain back at the end of the show the troglodyte terrorist can barely hide his disappointment.
“And here’s what you could have won…”
“The fall of the sinful West and the decline of Christianity. Ohhh, I was so close. What, no consolation prize.”
“A two-berth caravan in Penrith.”
“Has it got a kidney dialysis unit?”
“No.”
“I’ll take it anyway. The mortgage on this cave is killing me.”
The caravan contains only a cruet set, Andy Mc Nab and Lewis Collins. Osama is f**ked. He already had a cruet set.
September 29th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
We need to rethink the entire campaign.
Pull all the troops out and rely on adverts in the local media.
Plus the sale of wristbands to show that we really care…
September 29th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
well if ant and dec can’t sort it out we’re really fucked.