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High Times In Class C As Pupil Gives Teacher Hash Cakes
HIGH times at Class C, at Wortley High School in Leeds, West Yorks, where a 15-year-old has been expelled after, allegedly, giving hash cakes to two teaching assistants.
Says the Sun:
The members of staff fell violently ill with dizziness and severe headaches hours after tucking into treats the teenager made at home.
It was cannabis. Well, “probably”. The Sun says the cakes have not been tested.
The student would seem to have right to appeal, and should we not applaud her home economics skills. She did not buy the hash cakes ready made but produced them self from scratch, and all natural ingredients.
But the news does not end there; nor does it really begin there. The Sun needs a hook to make the story worthy of its readers’ attention. So:
Wortley High School counts 7/7 London suicide bomber Shehzad Tanweer, 22, as a former pupil.
Pakistan’s Marijuana And Narcotics Detection Unit
Bombed Away: Taliban Turn Cannabis Into Heroin
California’s Marijuana ATM Machine
UN Plans For Legalisation Of Cannabis
Home Secretary Jacqui Smith Smoked Cannabis
EU Says Marijuana Less Dangerous Than Tobacco
Cannabis Use In The House Of Commons
Dutch Ban Smoking In Amsterdam Cannabis Cafes
An Interview With Home Secretary Jacqui Smith
Bombed Away: Taliban Turn Cannabis Into Heroin
The Economics Of Trafficking In French Cannabis
Posted: 6th, October 2008 | In: Food & Fat, Tabloids Comments (16) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink
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October 8th, 2008 at 11:10 pm
I live next door to the school. They never offered any to me. Have I been discriminated against
October 8th, 2008 at 5:17 pm
wow what a clever girl . she could make a lot of monney selling cake to the houses of parlement. let them eat cake, then we will all be happey
October 8th, 2008 at 12:31 pm
I would have given her an A+ not expulsion.
October 8th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
What a fucking laugh get in there teachers!
October 6th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
It’s the dysentery way to weight loss. Try making coffee. I like Elvera’s recipe, but this is easier.
Grate substances (if solid) into pan. Add milk, a little water and sweeten (heavily, because it tastes bloody horrible like this) to taste.
Warm. Do not allow to boil.
Strain into cup through muslin or coffee filter paper.
See things. Giggle. eat way too much munchy food.
Wonder where the last two days went.
Repeat as necessary, or until occifers kick door in.
Removes the nasty, harmful ciggies from the equation.
October 6th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
You mean you don’t even bother to set fire to it?
October 6th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
although it’s a lot less pissing about to just eat the dope.
October 6th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
some of us never left.
October 6th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
we’ve all been there
October 6th, 2008 at 11:56 am
Kids these days probably don’t bother with Mary Jane. They’ll have something that makes you pull a frozen, shocked face with a McCauley Culkin style ‘O’ of a mouth for twelve hours. Take half a tablet and you only do it for six hours. They probably call it ‘Muncking’. “I was Muncked off me ‘ed last night, me jaw’s killin’ me.” They need a replacement for ‘E’ anyway now that it seems to have become commonplace and passé.
“A drug that makes you want to hug sweat-soaked strangers? No ta. It’s The Scream for me.”
Ah, the yoof. If you told ‘em shooting up with Domestos and Pop Rocks through the fontanelle was a buzz they’d try it…but only if it was new.
October 6th, 2008 at 11:49 am
Quick and easy recipe - Take small box of Cocopops and 4 big blocks of Galaxy and a half pint of double cream. Melt the chocolate and stir in the cream and any preferred drugs. Not Calpol!!!Pour onto two baking trays and allow to cool in the fridge or freezer.
Break small pieces off as and when necessary.
Such as when your accountant arrives with bad news!
October 6th, 2008 at 11:41 am
I don’t suppose that in the midst of these drug crazed reminiscences it’s occurred to anyone that the poor girl may be innocent?
Tragic victim of a passing virus?
Typhoid Mary’s great grand daughter?
How swift we are to judge!
October 6th, 2008 at 10:30 am
“Wait a minute…that’s not what I meant Julie…sit down by the way, your wobbling head is making me freak out a little…it’s anti-Floyd…no, proto-Floyd…no, it’s Funk Ployd…hee hee…wow…has anyone got any of that bubble gum that’s two flavours in one…that stuff’s great…let’s all go down to the music room and have a jam session…triangles only for the idiots in the back row there - I’m stoned, not stupid”
October 6th, 2008 at 10:30 am
######”Take 1 teaspoon black peppercorns, 1 whole nutmeg, 4 average sticks of cinnamon, 1 teaspoon coriander. These should all be pulverised in a mortar. About a handful each of stoned dates, dried figs, shelled almonds and peanuts: chop these and mix them together. A bunch of canibus sativa can be pulverised. This along with the spices should be dusted over the mixed fruit and nuts, kneaded together. About a cup of sugar dissolved in a big pat of butter. Rolled into a cake and cut into balls about the size of a walnut, it should be eaten with care. Two pieces are quite sufficient”####
October 6th, 2008 at 10:25 am
More likely…
The members of staff…giggled a bit, said “Let’s all go outside and learn in the sunshine this afternoon”, and played some early Parliament records to the class - repeating “Get this kids - ‘Maggot Brain’, it’s Floyd but not Floyd; get your heads around that then”…after tucking into treats the teenager made at home.
October 6th, 2008 at 10:17 am
this is excellant..