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Posts Tagged ‘advertising’

NetMums and anal sex – sponsored by Disney On Ice

Following news of swearing on Mumsnet and how advertisers are being unnerved by it, we spot an advert for Disney on rival site NetMums. The adverts entices readers to:

WIN a VIP family ticket to Disney On Ice presents Passport to Adventure, and be part of the show!

The ad is targeted at readers who arrive on a page on which the topic of discussion is:

Thread: blow jobs and takin it up the bum tmi sorri but need advice


NEtmums sex disney


And it’s not just Disney. A search for ‘Anal Sex” brings up lots of tips on how best to lube up – plus adverts for BMW, ALDI (‘Everyday Amazing’) and Nationwide building society.





And the Financial Conduct Authority, which wants to know if you’ve been shafted:


netmums FCA



It’s what Snow White would have wanted.


Posted: 17th, September 2017 | In: News, The Consumer | Comment

Mumsnet embroiled in swearing threat

According to Mumsnet, it is “the UK’s most popular parenting website”. It’s largely monetised through adverts. But the advertisers have begun to look at what the brands are appearing alongside. Turns out that mums who spend their days talking rubbish on Mumsnet are swearing. So ‘bad’ is is that the National Trust and Bulgari are threatening to pull their adds unless it stops.

The Economist has produced a chart of the sweariest places on the site:


Mumsnet swearing


Swearing is enjoyably versatile. And any moves to sanitise the web are regressive. But the marketeers are only calling for the kind of ban already enforced at football grounds and on the street: in 2016 Salford City Council introduced a Public Space Protection Order that banned swearing on Salford Quays, site of BBC Media City and new quayside homes. Caught using “foul and abusive language” around the Quays and suffer the consequences. The council said it was “satisfied the ban will improve quality of life” for those living in Salford Quays.

But will such a ban make Mumsnet better or worse? Should soft-porn Bulgari get its own house in order first?



To say nothing of the National Trust’s filth:



Spotter: EconomistNaked Capitalism

Posted: 14th, September 2017 | In: Money, News | Comment

The ASA war on gender means mum gets the power drill and dad goes to Iceland

asa gender


The Advertising Standards Authority once complained about this site. An advert featuring Page 3 stunna Lucy Pinder was sexist, they alleged. Pinder welcomed readers to Old Mr Anorak’s throbbing organ, which for filthy lucre had been sheep-dipped in Lynx, the stuff that drives women wild with lust. It was all a lot of nonsense. Pinder was willing. No readers were damaged. And rumours abound of a whole generation of young Anoraks. Now the ASA is going for other “gender-stereotypical” commercials, seeking to censor inappropriate ads “that feature stereotypical gender roles”.

There’ll be no more Pinder presenting her primary sexual characteristics like Saint Agatha in a bikini. No more Oxo mum feeding her family. No more Ronseal man telling us it does “exactly” what it says on the tin. And no more ads for yoghurts in which a baby-voiced female celebrity talks about her “tummy”.

Such amplification of “stereotypical gender roles” can “cause harm”. These ads “reinforce assumptions that adversely limit how people see themselves and how others see them”. It turns out that Lynda Bellingham is a bigger role model than your actual mum and dad.

So mum gets the power drill for Christmas after all, and dad gets a trip to Iceland for own-brand ketchup and other tastes of regret.

How’s that for progress?

Posted: 20th, July 2017 | In: Key Posts, News, The Consumer | Comment

Fail: CNN illustrates Nice horror with advert for tyres

So how did CNN illustrate the story of the Islamist maniac who murdered scores of people on Bastille Day in Nice, France? With an advert for Falken tires [sic] that grip:


breaking news ads nice cnn


Native advertising is a horror, Whoever invented it should be taken from this place and forced to live in an echo chamber.

Posted: 16th, July 2016 | In: Key Posts, Reviews, The Consumer | Comment

Skydiver and cat jump sat in a fully furnished lounge

sky diver jump cat


In this advert professional skydiver Jeff Provenzano show us that so hip are Nvidia Shield tablet computers that anyone owning one can experience the thrill of skydiving with their cat by simply turning one on.


Spotter: Nerd Approved, Neatorama

Posted: 19th, November 2015 | In: Reviews, Technology, The Consumer | Comment

Liking isn’t helping: Crisis Relief Singapore tells hashtag activists to belt up

Looks like hashtag activism isn’t working. The call to #BringBackOurGirls never did prick Boko Harem to hand back the women it stole in Nigeria. Even vain Michelle Obama – wife of a man who supported ousting Libya’s Colonel Gaddafi in 2011 and sided with Libya’s version of the BNP – could not appeal to the better nature of Islamist loons drawing up new boarders in Africa by tweeting the aforesaid hashtag and tilting her head.

Publicis Singapore’s advert for Crisis Relief Singapore tells us “Liking isn’t helping”. The advert has won a Gold Lion in Press category at Cannes Festival.

Not liking can win you an industry gong in a swanky resort. Liking just makes you feel better about yourself and lets everyone else know how morally correct you are…


crisis-relief-singapore likes 2

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Posted: 27th, May 2015 | In: Reviews | Comment

That’s (not) Entertainment: how TV killed The Jam



That’s NOT Entertainment!

For some time now our happy island nation has, slowly but surely, been invaded by an uninvited and unwelcome breed.

This is nothing to do with immigration, asylum-seekers, refugees, the EU or any of the other supposed threats that exercise the newspapers at election time.

No, this is an insidious invasion that has targeted our TV screens, and in particular the advertisements, ‘trails’ and promotional montages that seem to take up as much time as the programmes they punctuate…

The invaders are instantly recognizable by their distinctive singing style: breathy, slightly flat, sometimes with an ‘emotive’ crack in the voice. Their songs are, variously: drippy, dippy, dull and dreary. They are invariably accompanied by willfully amateurish acoustic guitar. This formula is used to advertise everything from white goods to Barclays’ revolting ‘thank you’ to ‘real football fans’.

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Posted: 20th, April 2015 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer, TV & Radio | Comment

Daily Mail invites readers to perv at ‘underge’ American Apparel model in her underwear

Irony overload in the Daily Mail, which brings news that an advert by fashion company American Apparel has had “ANOTHER advert banned, this time for ‘too sexy’ photos of underage-looking model in thong bodysuit”.

The Daily Mail hates looking at sexualised underage girls and ogling them. You can see how much it hates leering at underage girls here, herehere, herehere and here.

So, how does it choose to illustrate this apparent horror? Why, by publishing a photo of the American Apparel advert and zooming on the model’s primary sexual characteristics:


American apparel banned advert daily mail


American apparel banned advert daily mail



Posted: 18th, March 2015 | In: Fashion, Reviews | Comment

We done Carr watches for coming up with the most sexist and tacky advert yet

Screen shot 2015-01-20 at 20.00.43

Huge congrats to Carr watches for coming up with the most sexist/tacky advert yet.

Spotter: The subeditor @subedited

Posted: 20th, January 2015 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Woman who wet her pants at scary theme park upset her photo is being used by company



Can you identify someone by their crotch? What about if that crotch is wet?

One woman thinks you can. That’s her on the advert for the Spookers theme park in South Auckland. The attrction is using a photo of the woman’s wet shorts on the top banner on their Facebook page.

The woman wants the photo removed. She says those who know knows it’s her.

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Posted: 19th, January 2015 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Brendan Jordan arrives: the gayest boy in the world advertises for American Apparel


Your hero in the above video is Brendan Jordan, the 15-year-old lurker who seized his chance when local news filmed in his area.

Said Master Jordan:

“I just saw a camera, and did my thing. I was imagining myself as if I were Lady Gaga, and that no one could destroy me.”

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Posted: 8th, December 2014 | In: Fashion | Comment

Boozvertising: The Art of Selling Alcohol With Sex And A Stuffed Penguin

THE beautiful thing about hard liquor advertising is that it is rarely nuanced or boring. It opts for the ham fisted approach, beating consumers over the head with brazen sexual tactics.  After all, they’re not selling sofa pillows here, folks.  They’re selling booze, and that means things may get interesting…



boozvertizing (5)


The “Two Fingers is all it takes” campaign begs the question – all it takes to do what?  Considering we’re talking about tequila, I assume it isn’t “improve your golf swing”.

It would have been interesting if the adverts finished their tagline with a bit of truthfulness, such as “Two Fingers is all it takes…. to impair your judgment and make terrible, life-changing mistakes.”



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“I never even thought of burning my bra until I discovered Smirnoff.”

I don’t even get this.  Is she saying she didn’t believe in Women’s Lib until she starting drinking cheap vodka?  I guess I can relate.  I didn’t believe in Global Warming until I started huffing gasoline. (That was a joke, for those whose feathers are ruffled.)


boozvertizing (1)


Was this advert inspired by the abusive relationship of Ike & Tina?  This just makes me uncomfortable.  If only this was a Pam Grier film, she’d knock that glass to the floor saying, “You didn’t say ‘please’, bitch!”



boozvertizing (2)


They don’t have a sense of humor at airport security like they once did.  You do this nowadays and, instead of a laugh, you’ll get tasered and pepper sprayed.  If they’re feeling particularly jovial, they may even throw in a thorough cavity search and a trip to exotic Guantanamo for free.



boozvertizing (7)


The “sex sells” approach has always been a key marketing strategy for alcohol.  A clever tag line is great, but nothing beats a pair of boobs in a booze advert.


Although, sometimes some thinly veiled sexual innuendo does the trick even better…



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There’s definitely something phallic going on here.  It’s as if Sigmund Freud himself was in charge of the Smirnoff account.



boozvertizing (1)


Translated literally:  “Your secretary will have sex with you, if you have lots of Cossack Vodka on hand.”


Presenting hard liquor as a gateway to otherwise impossible sexual relations was a common marketing strategy.  A perfect example is the following advert featuring a young Ali McGraw.


boozvertizing (8)


The text is spectacular:

“Never go to a bachelor’s pad alone… Especially if she has roommates.  Bachelor gals get nervous when an available male walks in, empty handed.  But come up with a bottle of White Horse and – thank – you’re welcome, Good Guy!  It’s the Scotch with the taste even roommates can’t argue about: either they like it or they love it.  So you end up with a roomful of purring girls, Good Guys all.  Works in a pad.  Works in a pub.  Because – the Good Guys are always on the White Horse.”

Quite literally, this bottle of Scotch will act as a pheromone, luring hordes of “purring” babes to your bachelor pad so you can have sex with them- all of them.



boozvertizing (11)


Lest you imagine the “sex sells booze” approach was strictly a Western thing, this advert clears up any misconception.  Asian advertisers were wise to the selling power of a chick in a silver bikini living in an empty gin bottle.  You might say Japanese were the greatest experts of them all.



boozvertizing (10)

Then again, the Japanese also made insanely stupid ads like this one, completely undermining my previous statement.  Of course, when it comes to booze adverts, the Japanese by no means have a monopoly on stupidity….



boozvertizing (6)


What the-? This is how I image the Madison Avenue brainstorming session went for this one:

 Ad Exec: “Okay, boys.  We need to sell some vodka.  Let’s hear the ideas.”

Jim:“I think we should go with a smoking hot babe wearing a tiny bikini, holding a bottle of vodka while splayed out on a bearskin rug.”

Fred:”I think we should go with a homely couple inexplicably taping a plastic bag to a stuffed penguin.”

Ad Exec: “Genius, Fred! Genius!”

Jim: (appears hopelessly confused then mumbles incoherently walking away)



boozvertizing (5)


Her shirt reads “It’s Real”.  I suppose it’s better than “They’re Fake”, but still not the greatest thing to emblazon across a female’s breasts.  She already looks a little tipsy, so she probably doesn’t care.


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These Boodle ads from 1982 used the “always proper” British Gin as a slang for sex.  I wish they had gone a bit further with it.  For example, “Is it proper to boodle a complete stranger?”  Or even better, “Is it proper to boodle a circus clown while tripping on bath salts?”

boozvertizing (9)


“Have you these features? [A] Eyes deep set in soft flesh… characteristic of an appreciative type. [B] Ears lying close to the head… characteristic of a type with good taste.”

I guess we can deduce that those of you with protruding eyes and big ears have terrible taste.  You can’t argue with genetics.

Posted: 9th, May 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment

1955 Hair Tonic Advert: Lucky Tiger Gets the Gals

IN the 1950s, Lucky Tiger would seduce the girls. If you got really lucky, you could mount their heads.



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Posted: 28th, April 2014 | In: Fashion, Flashback, The Consumer | Comment

Miracle Appliances And The Desperate 1970s Women That Loved Them

WHEN mankind emerged from the primordial ooze that was that was the 1940s, homes began a rapid upgrade.  The Western nations’ economies grew in tandem with technology, and the benefits began to enter the home in the form of appliances that promised to transform the household.  Now you could own a toaster  – oh, the possibilities!


vintage appliance (5)


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Posted: 31st, March 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, Technology, The Consumer | Comment (1)

Social Media Morons Of The Day: Ribena For Breakfast

WHAT the Mad Men of advertising’s Golden Age would have made of today social media experts can only be guessed at. And our guess is they’d have made them unemployed. Anyone with a spark of creativity louder than a gnat’s fart would nowadays be hailed as social media guru.

Today’s disaster is supplied by Ribena, the sugary drink.


ribena fail


The Tweet copy trills:

“There’s no better way to start the day than sitting down to watch #DayBreak with a cuppa for you and a glass of Ribena Plus for the kids!”

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Posted: 26th, March 2014 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment

Sex Sells Tobacco: 10 “Smoking Hot” Vintage Adverts

THE STORY of tobacco in advertising is a long and winding tale.  At some points it has targeted children, at others it has tried to sound like a health food.  The specter of cancer has loomed over the product for decades, and advertisers have done their best to divert your attention from the elephant in the room.  Tobacco advertising has been overtly sexist and overtly pro-woman (i.e. Virginia Slims); it will be anything you want it to be in order to gain your love and trust.

Indeed, we could  talk all day about the dubious practice of selling carcinogens, but let’s focus on the one tactic that tobacco peddlers have relied on most.  Here are ten fantastically sexy and sexist vintage ads for your viewing pleasure.


tobacco ad (26)


Can you believe they actually tried to make the second-hand smoke smell good?  This one advertises cherry and blueberry flavor.  I suppose it sounded like a good idea on paper.  After all, why must smoke always smell like the Grim Reaper farted? Why can’t second-hand smoke not only cause cancer, but smell great too? Well, you’ve got to hand it to Tipalet for giving it the college try, even if it did end with abysmal failure.  Fruity smokes may not have worked out, but at least it spawned this infamous advert ….

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Posted: 4th, February 2014 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, The Consumer | Comments (2)

3 Highly Disturbing Vintage Ads From The 70s And 80s

EVER been scared by an advert?


Have Her In Stitches (literally)



THIS advertisement comes from a 1982 Canadian newspaper. Notice anything particularly troubling about it?

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Posted: 9th, December 2013 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment

Great ads: Sheffield’s TNT Transform Gym finds truth in advertising

GYM advert of the day: Sheffield’s TNT Transform Gym. Who needs a big budget?

best gym ad of the day


Spotter: Charlotte Cramer

Posted: 22nd, September 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Cool Ads: Wren Kitchens Advert

COOL Ad Watch: Wren Kitchens Advert – Which costs more?

Posted: 9th, September 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Marmite advert ‘mocks’ child protection agencies and fat police


AD Watch spots this Marmite advert which parodies the work of animal welfare officers. It has attracted an impressive  250 official complaints to the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA).

A spokesman for the ASA said complaints vary from the ad being in “poor taste” to being “deeply offensive” because it “trivialises” the work of both animal welfare charities and child protection agencies.

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Posted: 7th, August 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Woman on period gets eaten by shark – blames leaky tampon

russian tampax advert shark

RUSSIAN tampax tampon advert of the day:

The World’s Worst Tampon Ads are here.

Posted: 2nd, July 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Is that a young Lindsay Lohan advertising the perils of poo eating for Bristol Council?

bristol child poo

CAN a child’s work ruin the adult’s career?

Dennis Waterman did not let a boyhood advertising Rowntree’s Fruit Gums hold him back from a successful TV career. Little Dennis sang:

Don’t forget my fruit gums, Mum,
I just love those fruit gums, Mum,
Thruppence buys a tube of fruit gums,
Gums that last all day.
Bring me home some fruit gums, Mum,
All my pals love fruit gums, Mum,
Rowntree’s fruit gums last the longest,
That’s why we all say:
They’re smashing! They’re Rowntree’s!

The young Dakota Fanning shilled for Tide, dribbling food down her pink dress. She too would go on to achieve showbiz fame.

A past promoting the GAF Viewmaster did Jodie Foster no harm. She went on to become an A-list Hollywood stalwart.

So there is hope, then, for the child seen eating dog poo in the above advert created for Bristol Council. We could be looking at the next Lindsay Lohan…

Posted: 24th, June 2013 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment (1)

States United to Prevent Gun Violence produce this great anti-gun advert

States United to Prevent Gun Violence

IS this the greatest anti-gun advert? States United to Prevent Gun Violence has  message:


That’s a great slogan and advert, isn’t it?

Posted: 1st, May 2013 | In: Reviews, TV & Radio | Comment