Alice Douglas Is A Hero’s Hero: The World’s Worst Columnist Is Here To Entertain You

ALICE Douglas will now pander to every one of your prejudices. She will explain why you dislike toffs, pushy mums, Guardian readers, Daily Mail readers, modern parents, Guardian writers, other people’s children, reality TV, TV talent shows and humanity:

You may recall Alice as Lady Alice Douglas who in 2007, told Mail readers:

You kids just don’t know how to party

She wanted to tell us about her brill 16th birthday party:

At the time, my long-suffering mother, Ann, was married to the playwright Robert Bolt and living in Chiswick, West London. But she had kept a little house in Putney which had been hers before the marriage, and its style was her sole creation… I was a natural born punk. I embraced the whole philosophy even before I knew it had been invented.

Whoah, readers. Steady on with the laughter. Things are about to get even better. Lady Alice is now the Guardian’s plain Alice Douglas, and she wants to tell about her utterly brill kidzz.

One day in May this year, Hero, my 11-year-old daughter – a budding musician – decided to do a quick internet search for music competitions she could enter. Little did I know that within a matter of months this would lead to both Hero and her younger brother Tybalt appearing in separate television series before millions of people and immersing the whole family in the dizzying world of television talent shows.

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Anorak

Posted: 20th, December 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comments (5)