Katie Price Inflates Chantelle As Peter Andre Ends It All

KATIE Price and Peter Andre divorce: Chantelle Houghton’s promoted at Princess Tiaamii’s birthday, Jordan’s upset, Jordan the TV mogul and Peter Andre will not say anything more about it LIVE on Sky News…

STV: “Katie Price ‘not happy’ Chantelle met her kids”

Katie Price has admitted that she is unhappy that Chantelle Houghton has been introduced to her kids, a report claims.

In case the kidzzzz mistake Chantelle Houghton, for it is she, for their lookalike mum? And what of Katie Price’s partially sighted son Harvey who may start to think the he is in the care of not two but four giant space hoppers? Indeed, given how much mum’s face has altered, Harvey can glue a serving spoon onto a pair of watermelons and never be far from a mother figure.

The glamour model’s estranged husband Peter Andre invited the Celebrity Big Brother winner to Princess Tiaamii’s second birthday party, according to Now! magazine. Katie, who is currently dating cage fighter Alex Reid, said: “I was not happy.

“I have kept my mouth shut on this for a couple of weeks but it has upset me. She doesn’t even know my children so I cannot understand why she is at the party.”

To pop out of the cake? To twist her inflatables into the shape of a  dog? Says a Peter Andre source in The People:

“She was invited to the party because she belongs to the same management company as Pete.”

Anorak

Posted: 13th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (8)

Katie Price Bursts Over Peter Andre

IN this week’s OK! magazine: “JORDAN EXPLODES!”

It had to happen. The human body can only take so much pressure.

But Jordan is not dead. Little bits of orange skin and silicon rain are not falling on a weeping world. Jordan is alive. And she wasn’t to tell OK! readers about her and Pete.

Anorak

Posted: 29th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (5)

Katie Price Creates The Jordanettes Tribute Act

PETER Andre employs Can Associates PR. Chantelle Houghton employs Can Associates PR. Peter Andre used to be deeply in love with Katie Price, who is no longer represented by Can Associates.

Chantelle Houghton is a bit part Katie Price – literally. If you want to get on, attach yourself to Jordan. Andre and Houghton are the Jordanettes, a Katie Price tribute act.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)

Chantelle Houghton Is Paris Hilton Is Katie Price

CHANTELLE Houghton once worked as a Paris Hilton look-alike. Then she lassoed Katie Price’s go-it-alone Jordans to her chest and changed direction.

Now, as we reported, Chantelle has signed with Katie Price’s former agents, Can Associates, and so begins her new outing as Jilton, a Jordan Paris Hilton hybrid of neon hair and massive Jordans.

Anorak

Posted: 25th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)

Chantelle Houghton Signs For Jordan’s Old Agents

HAVING strapped on Katie Price’s Jordans, glued on the off-cuts and applied the wood stain to make her impermeable to shame’s daggers, Big Brother winner emeritus Chantelle Houghton has signed for Can Associates.

And, yes, that is the same PR firm that once took care of Katie Price – and continues to manage Peter Andre.

Anorak

Posted: 24th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Katie Price And Me: The Other Women Tell All

WANT to know what Ulrika Jonsson thinks of Katie Price and Peter Andre – “the split that ROCKED showbiz”?

THE other story in the Katie Price – Peter Andre split is Katie & Me – a narrative featuring any number of jobbing celebrities applying to give their views on the big story.

First up is Katie’s “former love rival” Mel B, aka Scary Spice.

The ex-Spice Girl – who dated Peter 12 years ago – urged the singer not to throw his marriage away, saying: “Please take Katie back.”

Anorak

Posted: 21st, May 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (6)

Men Choose Gail Trimble Over Chantelle Houghton

SURVEY discovers that “Men would rather date beautiful bimbos than ugly, clever women”.

They want Chantelle Houghton and not Gail Trimble.

Anorak

Posted: 20th, March 2009 | In: Reviews | Comments (2)

Chantelle Houghton Bags Jermain Defoe

IT was ever going to be so for Chantelle Houghton, erstwhile Big Brother winner, wearer of the gargantuan Jordans and now Wag to Tottenham Hotspur footballer Jermain Defoe, a man caught in a time loop.

One year ago, the News of the World told us:

“SPURS ace Jermain Defoe rolls off the busty mistress he has kept secret for an astonishing SEVEN YEARS… and plants the cups of her giant 36GG bra on his head.”

Anorak

Posted: 6th, February 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment

On The Sofa With Jordan’s Off-Cuts

CHANTELLE Houghton is a Big Brother housemate emeritus.

And now the Big Brother fanzine known as the Daily Star brings front-page news: “MY MARRIAGE WAS A BIG BROTHER FAKE.”

Chantelle, a woman comprised of Jordan’s rendered off-cuts – bits of Jordan are pressed together and piled onto Chanelle in the manner of chicken fillets onto a shish kebab – is on the telly with Piers Morgan in his show The Dark Side Of Fame.

Says she:

Read the rest of this entry »

Anorak

Posted: 25th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comments (7)