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Posts Tagged ‘clowns’

Four clowns of the apocalypse descend on Fargo

Clowns can make anything worse. To Fargo, North Dakota, where Roxane Salonen and her teenage son are playing tennis. They spy four figures approaching. All four are wearing clown masks. They are the four clowns of the apocalypse. She calls the police and speaks to the media. The West Central Tribune takes up the story:

She said they were chanting something as they closed in on her and her son, but they quickly ran as she called the police who told her it was the second report of masked clowns in the city that night.

“Even if it was a practical joke, right now it probably isn’t a good time to be doing that, because there’s so much worry right now in the world,” Salonen said.

For Brenda Giere, the owner of Halloween Express, clown costumes have become more popular in her store over the past few years.

She said clown masks and suits have been outselling classic Halloween costumes like werewolves and pirates, just based on scare factor alone.

Clowns – with their masks, socially distancing shoes and clip on noses, will clowns be the human cockroaches that outlive the Covid-19 pandemic?

Posted: 8th, October 2020 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Naked woman in clown make-up terrifies drivers

More Halloween oneupmanship as we read of 37-year-old Candice Kreidel. She’s been arrested for partially dressing up as a clown – she was mostly naked – and chasing cars.

Wearing clown make-up, a stocking cap and “either partially or completely nude”, Kreidel was seen running up and down a road in Clarksville, Tennessee. Police says she appeared to be chasing cars and jumping in front of other vehicles.

 

naked clown

 

The local newspaper reports:

While officers were headed to the location, there were four calls to 911 from a woman who berated, threatened, and cursed the dispatchers. Police determined these calls came from the suspect’s phone. When police arrived at her home, they found her in a sports bra, pyjama pants, and a stocking cap. Police said her face and body were covered in what could be described as clown make-up.

Kreidel, admitted to making the phone calls and running about in the road.

It;s an odd story. you’d think a driver might stop and help the naked woman stood in the street. Give her the right amount of make-up and what chivalrous man would not offer his assistance. Over-do the pancake and men forget their urges, slam their foot to the floor and make for the hills at speed.

 

 

Posted: 30th, October 2016 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Clowns arrested for crouching in woodland

To Kentucky, where Jonathan Martin, 20, has been arrested and charged with wearing a mask in a public place and disorderly conduct. Martin’s crime was to dress up as a clown. Police found him at 1:00am dressed in “full clown costume” crouching among trees.

 

clown arrested

 

The local news says, “Recent reports of clowns trying to lure children into woods have sparked alarm.”

On a list of things likely to seduce a child, dressing up as scary clown is one below a plate of raw broccoli.

 

clown arrested

“Dressing as a clown and driving, walking or standing in public can create a dangerous situation for you and others,” says Kentucky, police.  “While dressing up is not, in and of itself against the law, doing so in public and thereby creating an unnecessary sense of alarm is illegal.”

 


YouTube link.

Posted: 25th, September 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment


‘Gifted’ Bedfordshire Council Removes Circus Posters After Woman Complains They Make Her Too Scared To Walk

 

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“WE take complaints on a case by case basis but this was a short-term, easily solvable problem,” says Leighton Buzzard Council’s Senior operations officer Lisa Jarvis. “The circus is on the park which is our responsibility and we are responsible to our residents, so something like that is in our gift to fix, so we fixed it.”

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Posted: 20th, October 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Handyman clowns terrorise Northampton – who are they? (photos)

Northampton clowns

 

WHO are the teenagers “spotted acting suspiciously in Northampton“? A local woman contacted police on Thursday after two clowns arrived at her home offering to paint her window sills. She says they has no painting equipment with them. (Clue: check flower spray gun.)

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Posted: 16th, September 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Wash your hands kids or else the UNICEF clown will get you

WHAT did you do on Global Handwashing Day in Uzbekistan? In 2012, those hygiene thinking Uzbeks employed a clown to remind the kinder that failure to wash their hands would result in a hiding they would never forget. Either that or else Botchulism Bonzo is reading palms, explaining to this child that he has a very short life line and gripping your wrist leads to godless behaviours…

wash your hands

Spotter:  HIAControversies blog, Boing Boing

Posted: 27th, July 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment


In the 1950s Heinz thought clowns would make pickles fun – they didn’t (photos)

IN the 1950s, Heinz looked at pickles and wondered what went with them? The answer was simple: clowns. Middle-aged men in small hats and lots of make-up would make tummies rumble for jarred pickles. Look out for the clown with a face so stitched in the upwards grin that when eyeing his puke-encrusted sausage, he still smiles broadly. Unless he is, like Bom Bom, actually turned on by such things. But, then, Bom Bom’s a wanted man who only took to clowning because he had a tube of congealed pig’s blood, chronic anaemia and a chronic need for an alibi:

clown-pickles-4

Image 4 of 7

Posted: 9th, February 2013 | In: Flashback, The Consumer | Comment


Record Breaking Woman Cures Alcoholism With 2053 Clowns

KNOCK. Knock. Knock. Trick or treat? The door to Orty Kastaun’s home opens. The little horrors peer in. Orty smiles. “You like the clowns? They like you…”

You see, 61-year-old German Orty holds the Guinness World Record for owning the world’s largest collection of clowns – 2,053 clown-related items, since you’re asking.

Don’t panic, kids. Orty is a recovering alcoholic and the clowns are part of her therapy. Clowns know best. Clowns know everything? They know what you are thinking…

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Posted: 29th, October 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Killer Clowns On Loose In El Salvador: Unregistered Ones

IN El Salvador, beware the imposter clowns. The imposter clowns kill. You’ll die laughing:

About 100 professional clowns who make money by performing on public buses marched through the Salvadoran capital Thursday to protest the killing of a passenger by two imposter clowns …

“We are protesting so that people know we are not killers,” said professional clown Ana Noelia Ramirez. “The people who did this are not clowns. They unfortunately used our costume and our makeup to commit a monstrous act.”

The War On Clowns, PC Konk And Other Big Shoe Wearers

The protesters – wearing oversized bow ties, tiny hats and big yellow pants – marched down San Salvador’s main street in an effort to both entertain and educate passersby. Several held signs insisting that real clowns are not criminals.

Clown-union leader Carlos Vasquez says he plans to issue IDs to all real clowns and urge police to detain those who do not have them.

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Posted: 15th, June 2010 | In: Strange But True | Comment