Posts Tagged ‘daily mail’
Madeleine McCann: a bride of Christ, an old story and grief recast as a mental health issue
No word on Madeleine McCann in any of today’s printed tabloids. But there is is news on the web. Following the non-news that the Met might or might not seek money to continue Operation Grange, the investigation into the disappearance of Madeleine McCann in 2007, the Express online delivers: “Madeleine McCann’s father reveals mental health battle in HEARTBREAKING interview.” As ever it was, the Press are watching the parents.
Madeleine McCann’s father will speak about the grief and depression he faced over losing his daughter in a heartbreaking interview on Radio 4, in a bid to remove the prejudice men face when talking about their feelings.
What prejudice? No TV or radio show is complete without a man crying, whether it be over a DNA test on mid-morning telly or a well-baked cake on prime time. “I decided it was a good opportunity to say something about the special bond between fathers and daughters,” says Gerry McCann, “thinking that speaking openly might help other men in similar positions. It feels like the right time.” Fir enough. But isn’t there is a special bond between men and their children, regardless of gender. The sane can surely sympathise with parent whose lost a child, but why is this news? Someone from the BBC explains:
“We look at Gerry’s experiences, his thoughts and feelings, and the wider context in society of mental health issues surrounding a loss. Susan Roberts, our producer, has already interviewed Gerry over the past few weeks, it has been recorded and we are now doing the final edit. It’s very emotional and helps get across the point of view of mental illness associated with a loss or bereavement of a family member or friend, that there is no stigma in men opening up and discussing emotions with someone is important. In our show there is a parallel between the poem of a father’s loss and the real life experience, reflecting the two.”
Eh? Grief and loss is now a form of mental illness? It’s not a human reaction to loss. It’s a treatable condition. As for the tosh about men not emoting and expressing themselves, how may poems has the producer ever read? What about books, films, music and art? Did women write them all? As for facts about the missing child, we’re told: “There have been 8,685 potential sightings of Madeleine in 101 countries, but all of them have been ruled out.”
Over in the Mail, where the BBC press release is an “exclusive”, we learn:
He will be interviewed by poet Simon Armitage on a special Radio 4 show: Pearl: Two Fathers Two Daughters. The show will weave together two voices of grief: Mr McCann’s and that of an anonymous poet from 600 years ago who laments the loss of his daughter in a poem entitled Pearl.
Mr Armitage, who wrote a poem to mark the 1,000 days of Madeleine McCann’s disappearance, has written a new translation of Pearl. We don’t know who wrote the original version about the loss of a child and her father’s pain. The New Yorker reviewed the poem steeped in New Testament imagery and numerology in 2016. In one scene her father sees his lost daughter as the bride of Christ:
In the poem, the narrator visits the spot where a pearl once slipped from his grasp and got lost among “Gilofre, gyngure, & gromylyoune, / & pyonys powdered ay bytwene” (“ginger, gromwell, and gillyflower / with peonies scattered in between”). Swooning into unconsciousness, he comes to in a dream, in a place he has never been before, where cliffs split the sky (“ther klyfez cleven”). Across a river, he sees his pearl again, but now the “perle” is no mere thing—she is a young girl, richly arrayed in an elaborate outfit covered in pearls. Pearl also seems to be her name, or at least it is how the man addresses her: “ ‘O perle,’ quod I . . . ‘Art thou my perle?’ ” In reply, she calls him a jeweller, and he refers to her as a gem (“ ‘Jueler,’ sayde that gemme clene”).
Overcome with joy at finding his lost pearl, and unable fully to understand the complicated things she says to him, the dreamer plunges into the river to swim toward her. He is desperate to “swymme the remnaunt, thagh I ther swalte”—to swim across, or die trying. This angers the ruler of the celestial land, called the Prince: the dreamer does not belong there. He is flung out of his dream as punishment. He wakes up, and the poem ends with a short meditation on the glory of God, and then the words “Amen. Amen.”
The child in Pearl is dead. We do not know what happened to Madeleine McCann, save for her vanishing.
On a final note the Mail tells us:
The doctor’s new-found openness to help others cope with loss comes after Prince Harry, now Duke of Sussex, spoke about his struggles with mental health in a groundbreaking podcast interview on May 2017 with the Daily Telegraph’s Bryony Gordon for her revered ‘Mad World’ series. The young royal spoke openly about bottling up his emotions and being unable to grieve for years after the loss of his mother Princess Diana, who was killed in a car crash in Paris in August 1997.
From Princess Diana to Madeleine McCann. When private grief became celebrity mourning.
Posted: 17th, September 2018 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann, News | Comment
Spurs goalie Hugo Lloris inspires millions of kids to get drunk and drive slowly in a Porsche
Spurs goalkeeper Hugo Lloris has been found guilty of drink driving. It’s amazing that someone on big money bothers to drive when they can surely get blotto and hail a taxi. Lloris was fined £50,000 for his idiocy – police spotted him driving at 15mph in a 30mph zone in Mayfair, London, and banned from driving for 20 weeks. But this is about reporting on the matter – and it’s as confused as Lloris.
What car was he in?
A £140,000 Porsche Panamera – Daily Mail
“The goalkeeper’s £115,000 Porsche was seen veering across the road” – London Evening Standard
A £65,000 Porsche – The Sun
“A new Porsche Panamera” – The Guardian
You can buy a new Porsche Panamera from £68,0000.
Day of Chunder
“His 2018 Porsche Panamera was covered in vomit” – Daily Star
“There was evidence of vomit at the scene” – the Sun
Will Spurs fine him?
Spurs will dock him two-weeks wages, around £300,000 – Daily Mail
“Spurs have fined Lloris £250,000 – two weeks wages – Daily Star
And The Role Model Balls
Joshua Harris, director of campaigns for the charity Brake, told media: “It is disappointing to see that someone who is a role model to many thousands of football fans has admitted breaking the law by drink-driving. We expect the captain of Tottenham Hotspur and his national team to be setting a good example, not flouting the law in such a manner.”
Said no young football fan ever: “When I grow up I’m going to buy a fast car, get pissed and drive him very slowly because everything Hugo Lloris does Im going to do too.”
Lloris is not a role model. He’s a footballer. He’s no more of a role model than anyone else caught drink-driving, unless it’s your mum or dad…
Posted: 13th, September 2018 | In: Back pages, Sports, Spurs | Comment
Boris Johnson and Carrie Symonds are cosier than an otter’s pocket
News that Boris Johnson has been named an “adulterer” in divorce papers comes as a shock to anyone who wakes each day, quints at the sun and asks, ‘What the bloody hell is that?’ To the Sun Johnson’s penile adventures are an alliterative tale of of ‘Bonking Boris”, a “long-suffering wife” called Marina Wheeler and 30-year-old “Tory aide” Samira Mohammed. No, only joking. The alleged other woman is called Carrie Symonds, and she’s not wearing a burqa because we can see her face on the Mail’s front page.
In the Sun we see photos of Johnson in his garden. He’s drinking from a mug – a metaphor perhaps – and looking “grim-faced” at his phone. Both pictures are credited to Simon Jones, aka “Sun photographer Simon Jones”. Might they, you know, be staged? “Explosions aside, Boris is still The One,” states Trevor Kavanagh three pages on in the paper., not exactly discounting the idea that the Sun is presenting the philanderer in a good light.
The photos also appear in the Mirror, but it’s main thrust is not into Carrie Symonds, but Johnson’s Mail on Sunday column in which he said Theresa May had “wrapped a suicide vest around the British constitution” and handed the trigger to Brussels. A few Tory MPs are lined up to say how revolting that is. Amid the “fury” the Mirror says it asked one Tory MP “if Mr Johnson had put a bomb under Mrs May’s leadership”. I see Tory MP Tom Tugendhat’s horrific tale of a suicide bomber who maimed and murdered many in the courtyard of his office in Helmland, and notice the bomb detonated below then British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, which killed five Tories, including one MP, and permanently disfigured many more.
But what’s that? “Show us the totty!” Ok. The Mail obliges with five phots of Symonds – a “fun-loving blonde”. She is “glamorous” – and what more speaks of glamour than shagging Boris Johnson; maybe finding a pre-loved glamour magazine in a bush? – a “Tory party cheerleader”who tweeted as her name rode high on the news cycle: “Sea otters have the thickest fur of all animals.” To say nothing of their pockets – an otter’s pocket being something Johnson finds irresistible.
Posted: 10th, September 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment
Copper called Pyle arrests woman for slapping his bum
She was only “copping a feel” puns the Sun in its take on Inspector Owen Pyle, 28, who arrested a woman at the Notting Hill Carnival for “patting” him on the bum. Yeah, this is story about a man called Pyle’s arse. Oh, nominative determinism.
Having nicked the “boozy reveller”, Pyle did as all police must and took to twitter. “I didn’t come to work to be sexually assaulted while doing my job,” he tweeted. That kind of behaviour is unacceptable.” To say nothing of it being illegal, which his tweet didn’t. The paper says the Met Police have not said if the woman “faces action”.
But over in the Mail, Pyle is repotted as having said the women was arrested for being drunk and disorderly – which is not the same as being arrested for “patting”. She was issued with a dispersal order banning her from the carnival.
Scotland Yard has issued a statement:
“At 21:45hrs on Monday, 27 August a 26-year-old woman was arrested on suspicion of being drunk and disorderly in Westbourne Park Road, W2.
“She was taken to a central London police station, where she was issued a dispersal order requiring her to leave the Carnival footprint.”
The Carnival what?
Sun and Mail at odds over Newcastle vicar who allegedly groped man on flight
To Newcastle Crown Court, where vicar Peter McConnell is accused of groping a fellow traveller aboard a flight from the US to London. Innocence is assumed, of course. Mr McConnell denies any wrongdoing. The trial continues. This is not about Mr McDonnell, rather reporting on the matter. Might it call be a case of mistaken identity?
The Daily Mail identifies Mr McConnell thus:
The Mail
But the Sun spots a different man apparently of the same name:
The Sun
A look at the Newcastle Chronicle reveals that the Sun’s photo is the correct one.
Green Party attacked over prospective leader’s rapist father
The Green Party has issued a statement on the sentencing of David Challenor, 50, father to the Green Party equalities spokesperson Aimee Challenor. He has been convicted of torturing and raping a 10-year-old girl in the loft of the family’s home in Coventry. Aimee is transgender, having been born a boy and transitioned at age 16. Those are the facts all media shares.”The Green Party was not aware of any of these allegations until the case concluded and Mr Challenor had been sentenced,” says the statement. Which seems a bit remiss.
David Challenor
It continues:
Mr Challenor has not held any elected positions in the Green Party although Aimee appointed him as her election agent for the General Election in 2017 and local election in May 2018.
But he was a member of the Green Party until his sentencing. The Party did know who he was. And reports say those appointments to help his daughter took place after his arrest. Again, the Greens seem a little less than thorough when it comes to checking things.
Innocent until proven otherwise, of course. But some of the reporting seems to be targeting innocent Aimee as much as her disgusting father and the slapdash Greens.
Aimee Challenor, 20, planned to become the party’s deputy leader. The Guardian says ‘she had had no idea about the crimes but was withdrawing from the race to prevent the election process becoming “dominated by what my father has done”.’
She too has issued a statement:
“I did not know about the full details of the crimes my father has been found guilty of until very recently. It is also very difficult to believe that a parent can be guilty of such abhorrent acts. That might be hard for you to understand, or to believe, but it is the truth. I was taken into care a few years ago and have also lived in independent supported housing. There were sustained periods where I did not live in the family home.
“But I cannot be held responsible for the actions of my father. I am not to blame for his behavior. Yes, he was my election agent. This was one of a number of ways I was seeking to reconcile my relationship with my father after coming out of care. On reflection, I can understand that it was unacceptable for me to appoint my dad as my election agent when he had been arrested. I can now understand the potential risks of that decision. For that I am sorry.”
The Times is a little less sympathetic, saying “she had used her father as her election agent even though he faced charges of raping and torturing a 10-year-old girl”. Readers are told “Aimee lived with him in a small two-up, two-down house”. Why mention the size of the family home if not to cast aspersions? And this:
On both occasions she appointed her father as her election agent, legally responsible for running her campaign, even though he had been accused of or charged with the crimes, which were reported to police in late 2015. By the time of May’s elections he had a trial date.
Candidates’ election campaign leaflets are legally required to include the name of their agent or promoter. Challenor’s leaflets for both campaigns, seen by The Sunday Times, did not show her father’s correct name, instead giving it as “Baloo Challenor”.
Baloo, a character from Rudyard Kipling’s The Jungle Book, was a nickname used by Challenor’s father in his work as an assistant Scout leader and volunteer with children’s gymnastics. He used his proper first name on the election nomination forms as Challenor’s agent.
The Mail is doubting, headlining the story: “Top Green Party star quits the party after hiring her father as her election agent despite knowing he was about to stand trial for rape and torture of a child.” The story begins:
“A transgender politician campaigning to be deputy leader of the Green Party hired her father as her election agent – despite knowing he was facing trial for the rape and torture of a child.”
Aimee Challenor’s gender is given top billing. She has condemned his “abhorrent crimes”, as anyone sane must. But the story of a depraved crime is being given a whiff of conspiracy. And over in the Sun, it’s pornographic: “ATTIC OF HORRORS Inside grotty torture den where sick rapist whipped girl, 10, and gave her electric shocks while dressed as a BABY.” Want to see where a child was tied to a beam, electrocuted and raped by man wearing an adult nappy? Maybe not.
Want to use a man’s sick crimes to cast a shadow of an innocent woman? Go ahead…
Posted: 27th, August 2018 | In: News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment
World Cup Watch: Daily Mail singles out Sterling for criticism
Raheem Sterling is rubbish in the Daily Mail
Did you know Manchester City and England striker Raheem Sterling has not scored for England in 1000 days? It’s a fact Matt ‘Statto’ Lawton wants to share with his Daily Mail readers. Sterling could have scored last night as England defeated Colombia on penalties to progress to the World Cup quarter-final but he was “hooked” off after 88 minutes. Sterling was replaced by Jamie Vardy, who in the Mail’s all-important “Jamie Redknapp’s Big Match Ratings” scores 6.5 – the same as Sterling gets. Sterling was not the worst England player on the pitch according to Redknob. He scored higher than Kyle Walker (6), Deli Alli (6) and Ashley Young (6). But why does Sterling feel the hatchet between his shoulder blades and the rest do not?
And what of Eric Dier’s scoring a 7? He had a “pass completion rate of less than 25 per cent in his first 24 minutes on the pitch” (source: Martin Samuel, Daily Mail) and was “ordinary” against Belgium. He did score in the penalty shoot-out, a shot that was a “bit scuffed and [David] Ospina got a hand to it”. But there he is on the Mail’s back page “The Coolest Man in Moscow”.
Sterling was “dangerous” in the Daily Mirror
He was cool? No. In the Mirror, Dier says he was “nervous”. Andy Dunn says “Sterling at least remains one who can dash past a defender, take a risk, create splash of chaos”, factors described as “rarities” in a game big on “chaos”. The Mirror gives Sterling a 7 – the same as Pickford, Trippier, Henderson and Kane. Only John Stones with 8 scores higher. Sterling was “dangerous”.
The Sun
The Sun says Sterling was “lively”
Over in the Sun, Sterling gets a 6. That’s a higher mark than Lingard and Henderson, and the same as Pickford, Walker, Young and Dele. The Sun says Sterling was “slippery and lively” and “darting”.
Sterling is “lively” in the Daily Express
In the Express, “lively” Sterling who “caused Colombia all kinds of problems” scores a 7 – that’s more than Pickford, Stones, Maguire, Henderson, Dele and Young. Only Harry Kane (8) scores higher.
So why is Sterling derided in the Mail? Has the Mail got a problem with Sterling?
It’s been while since Sterling scored in an England shirt, his last goal coming on 9th October 2015. But only Sterling gets compared to a “mascot” and a “jockey” in the Mail. No other player is so diminished.
Posted: 4th, July 2018 | In: Back pages, Key Posts, Manchester City, Sports, Tabloids | Comment
Gorleston beach death: bouncy castle trampoline pops in average heat
There’s “horror in the heat”. The Star leads with news that a young girl died when a bouncy castle “exploded”. The four-year-old was “catapulted” by the force of the exploding blue inflatable. “Dozens” watched as paramedics tried in vain to save the life of the girl in the ‘Bounce About’ play area on Gorleston beach, near Great Yarmouth, Norfolk. Or as the Mirror leads: “Tot killed by exploding trampoline.”
What was it: an inflatable or a trampoline?
The Mirror says the child was tossed 30 feet into the air when the “trampoline exploded in the searing heat”. Was the heat a factor in the horror? A witness says it was the “most horrific” thing they had ever seen. It sounds horrendous. Another says: “I’m sat next to the bouncy castle when it just popped.” Another says the girl was thrown “about 20 ft into the air”.
The witnesses says the castle “popped” and the girl was thrown 20ft into the air. The tabloids says the trampoline exploded and the heigh was 30ft. A child dies on a day out and for some news sources that’s not enough.
As for the heat being a factor in the horror, we only hear the owner of the inflatable castle / trampoline say “he believed the intense heat caused the explosion”. Maybe. But the heat sounds more like the trigger than the cause. The owner, identified as Curt Johnson, is then quoted: “It is very upsetting. An inflatable trampoline exploded because of the heat and that is all I know… It is quite shocking.”
As for the “searing heat”, well, the Mail says temperatures reached 73F. Not all that hot for a summer’s day, then.
An investigation is underway…
Gosport Scandal: killing the old is easy but facts are hard
Dr Jane Barton’s is the face we are getting to know. The Mail leads with the demand “PUT HER IN THE DOCK”. On what charge? The Express demands “justice for hundreds killed by ‘Dr Death'”.
Dr Barton, dubbed ‘Dr Opiate’, is “blamed” for failings that costs up to 650 lives at Gosport Memorial Hospital. The dead were aged 62 to 99. the saying is true: if you want to be invisible, go grey.
A report “accused” Dr Barton of “giving patients powerful drugs they did not need”. The number of dead is staggering: 456 people died after being prescribed opioids “without medial justification”; the records of 200 more have gone missing. The Mail guesses that “they probably suffered a similar fate”.
Who needs fact when you’re talking about life, death and justice?
Dr Barton worked at the hospital between 1988 and 2000. The deaths making news occurred between 1987 and 2001. The report by the former Bishop of Liverpool James Jones does not mention her alone. His report is, says the paper, “scathing” about senior consultants, nurses, pharmacists and managers at the Hampshire hospital. None of them are pictured in any newspaper.
The dead have been the subject of reports, three police investigations, two reviews by medical bodies and 11 inquests. Nurses raised concerns decades ago. And not a single criminal charge has been levelled at anyone. The word conspiracy is flung around. Its reach extends to scores of people. But is it valid?
On pages 6 to 11, Mail readers hear more of the “deadliest coverup”. One fact seems notable above others: in 2010 the GMC found Dr Barton guilty of misconduct and that she prescribed “potentially hazardous” amounts of drugs. She retained her licence to practice medicine. The Mail says she was made the subject of sanctions, one being that she could not prescribe opiates for three years. In March 2010 Dr Barton retired on a “fat” pension.
“Murder.” Who mentioned murder?
We’re not being invited to sympathise with Dr Barton. But what we crave are facts. But the papers can’t get the most basic of those right. The Mail says Dr Barton is 69. The Sun says she’s 70. The Mail says she is in Menorca. The Express says she’s in Majorca.
The Express: Barton is 69 in Menoca
The Sun: Barton is 70
The Mail: Barton is 69 in Majorca
It’s worth noting that Dr Barton has not been charged with any criminal offence – ever. But you know who has… Yep. Dr Harold Shipman.
Such are the facts.
Posted: 21st, June 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment
Spurs striker Kane in heartbreaker horror
The Daily Mail is not alone is praising Harry Kane, the Spurs and England footballer. His bare chest fills the Sun’s back page. “Everybody loves Harry,” says the Mirror on its. But only in the Mail is there a focus on Kane’s looks. Over pages 10 and 11, David Jones and Sarah Rainey gells readers that Kane is -“Shock horror!” – a footballer “England can be proud of”. His list of accomplishments are headlined:
- no tattoos
- polite
- patriotic
- engaged to his child his sweetheart
And handsome. “What a heartbreaker cooed one devoted fan on twitter.”
They did? Sort of. A search on twitter delivers this:
Wow what a heartbreaker for Tunisia
— #SaveTheElephants (@JayShindo) June 18, 2018
at the death, what a heartbreaker. are you happy now england, it only took demolishing 2 keepers
— Dank the Cowdog (@shittywonk) June 18, 2018
Wow. What a heartbreaker for #TUN but it was coming. Good goal Kane. #TUNENG
— Allison G (@goagray) June 18, 2018
I was cheering for the Tunisia upset too. What a heartbreaker 😪
— DonnyPhantom 🇫🇷 (@iLLumiDonny) June 18, 2018
What a heartbreaker for Tunisia. They hung in there until the 91st min. Harry Kane was unmarked at the far post and easily heads in the go ahead goal. #WorldCup #TUNENG #TUN #ENG
— Carlos (@CBarriosNYY311) June 18, 2018
No-one called Kane a heartbreaker on twitter.
Posted: 20th, June 2018 | In: Back pages, Sports, Spurs | Comment
Ant McPartlin, monstered Lisa and the blonde ‘rock’ who saved telly
Ant MacPartlin’s drugs habit and drink-driving have kept the papers busy. And now we read about his lover, one Anne-Marie Corbett, a 42-year-old married mum-of two. She used to work as a personal assistant to Ant and his wife Lisa. All tawdry and predictable stuff: married TV star takes drugs, drinks too much and shags blonde. But what’s interesting is how the tabloids are taking sides. You can tell which side they are on – Ant: the one who might give you interviews, sell newspapers and secure TV exclusives; or Lisa: the woman who won’t.
The Sun is Team Ant. Describing Anne-Marie as Ant’s “rock”, the Sun produces these photos of the trio:
The Rock and the Hard Face. Ann-Marie is “upset” says the caption. Poor Anne-Marie.
The photo the Sun chose to show of Lisa, who is not a drink-driver, has not taken drugs and has not been comforted by another
The happy couple – look how happy Ant is. And we want him to be happy. He’s on the telly.
The Sun also adds that “blazing rows over his £62 million fortune have made it [divorce] increasingly acrimonious”. His fortune? Not their fortune? Childhood sweethearts Ant and Lisa have been married since 2006. This is about Ant and us continuing to like him. Good old Ant:
Good old Ant sharing his money with his wife. Waddaguy!
The Mirror leads with news that Lisa “suspected” Ant was with Ann-Marie “months ago”. Poor Lisa. Let’s take a look at her:
Page 5 family – Lisa looks pretty good
Lisa Armstong in “torment”
The hard-faced blonde
The Mirror says Lisa and Anne-Marie were “pals”. Anne-Marie split from husband Scott in October last year. But that has nothing to do with Ant, say “insiders”. Perish the thought. Ant and Lisa broke up “10 months ago” – “long before he started dating his new love”. Ten moths ago was September 2017.
Over in the Mail and Lisa is looking happy. Ant is looking happy. Anne-Marie is wearing a “blue summer dress… with a plunging neckline, wedge heels, red lipstick and a Lulu Guinness tote bag”. She looks “glamorous”. The Express says Anne-Marie wore her “blonde hair loose”.
The final words is with an “insider, who tells the Express that Ant “could decide to to return to I’m A Celeb. That’s how far things have changed thanks to Anne-Marie”.
Rejoice! Ant is happy. The show will go on.
Posted: 20th, June 2018 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Tabloids | Comment
Tea towels you keep forever linked to food poisoning
Your tea towel is killing you. Maybe. The Daily Mail says “repeatedly using an old one could help to spread food poisoning“.
It’s said much the same thing many times.
“A 2015 study by Kansas State University found that, surprisingly, tea towels were the most contaminated surface during food preparation, fast becoming covered in bugs that can cause food poisoning” – 30 Jan 2018
The Mail says “make sure you sue a fresh tea towel“.
Professor Hugh Pennington, Emeritus professor of bacteriology at the University of Aberdeen tells readers on 11 August 2015: “In my house, all the dishes and cutlery are dried with disposable paper towels, as tea towels pick up bugs after more than one use.”
But on 7 December 2010, the Mail told us: “PS WHY YOU CAN KEEP TEA TOWELS FOREVER…”
Such are the facts…
Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson reunited in Mirror and Mail cut and paste disaster
The Mirror is promoting an auction of photographs by “royal snapper” John Scott, who died in 1986. The paper omits to mention where the auction is talking place – you can buy them at Cornwall auctioneer David Lay. But it does lead with a group phots that features “Fergie met Andy…possibly for the first time”. The Mail says is “the moment a young Fergie fixed eyes on Andrew”. No it isn’t. Not unless Sarah Ferguson, for it is she, was boss-eyed.
The paper trills: “A smiling Sarah Ferguson is clearly impressed by Prince Andrew as she claps eyes on him for the first time in the early 1970s.” Ferguson is described as being “very young” at the time. It was the summer of 1970. Fergie and Andrew was 10 – although the Mirror and Mail say they were “about 12”. The Mail also says they are both 10.
The Mail is clueless:
Having told readers this was not the first time Sarah met Andy, the Mail wonders, er, if it was:
Daily Mail: question asked; question answered
The tin lid on the utter balls is when you realise that she isn’t looking at Andrew – who isn’t looking at her – but towards Lady Sarah Armstrong-Jones.
The Mirror: the peril of copying a Press Release
Such are the facts.
Posted: 6th, June 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment
Spurs kill Pochettino’s dream to manage Real Madrid
Spurs manager Mauricio Pochettino has been talking about Real Madrid. He told us he’d have to listen if the Spanish club offered him the manager’s job. He gave Real a heads up about Spurs chairman Daniel Levy, saying the tough negotiator “bites”. Now the Mail says “Pochettino was, for all intents and purposes, offered the vacant manager’s job.” And: “He turned his back on his dream, knowing it would lead to questions over loyalty.”
That’s Pochettino who cut short his Southampton contract to manage Spurs.
The Mail then hammers home its point that Pottechino rejected Real not because he didn’t want the job, rather because he is principled:
Mauricio Pochettino rejected the chance to become Real Madrid’s next manager because he didn’t want to labelled a mercenary.
And:
Pochettino was offered the vacant position after Zinedine Zidane’s (right) departure.
Says who?
But sources claim the Argentine turned his back on a dream switch to Real, knowing such a move would lead to serious questions over his loyalty.
What sources? The Mail mentioned none.
Knowing chairman Daniel Levy would rebuff any approach from Spain, Pochettino knew he would have to force the issue if he wanted the Real job. It’s now apparent that Pochettino was unwilling to risk his reputation, fearing his integrity would suffer an irreparable blow.
It all reads like a PR missive. Only yesterday Guillem Balague was talking. The Spurs manager had been on a trip to Spain to plug his new book, Brave New World: Inside Pochettino’s Spurs – by Guillem Balague. Balague said Levy had scuppered any hope Pochettino had of managing Real. Now we get “sources” telling us that Levy and the manager’s conscience ended Pochettino’s “dream”.
Words from Real Madrid: nil. Facts to support the sources claims: nil.
PS: Real Madrid usually get their man.
27 Jun 2012: Tottenham’s Gareth Bale signs new four-year contract.
23 May 2013: “Gareth Bale to sign new Tottenham contract worth £150,000 a week” (Guardian)
1 September 2013: Gareth Bale agreed a £300,000 per week to join Real Madrid.
It’s not over yet. Everyone has their price at Spurs.
Posted: 5th, June 2018 | In: Back pages, Sports, Spurs | Comment
Chelsea owner Abramovich is not dead
CHELSEA FC owner Roman Abramovich is “BANNED FROM UK”. Well, so says the Daily Star. And it’s wrong. He’s just “faced delays in renewing his UK visa” the BBC “understands”. No that the Beeb knows much about the Russian billionaire who wasn’t at Wembley to see his investment win the FA Cup. This is its story in a nutshell:
Asked about the visa, Security Minister Ben Wallace said: “We do not routinely comment on individual cases.” Mr Abramovich’s office said it does not discuss personal matters with the media. Reports suggest his investor visa expired three weeks ago.
Apropos of nothing much, the BBC then adds: “He is believed to be close to current Russian President Vladimir Putin.”
Whatever anyone suggests and believes, the Star is happy to go out on a limb and scream on Page 7: “ROMAN TOLD: YOU’RE NOT WELCOME ANY MORE.” But just one line in and the bold statement is undone as the Star says Abramovich’s visa has “reportedly run out”.
It all promised so much. What football fan was not smirking and mentally counting the seasons as Chelsea, shawn of Russian money, slide to those pre-Roman days of lower-league football and in-fighting. Not that a club’s overseas-domiciled owner needs to be a fan nor show up to games – see Man City, Man United, Spurs, Arsenal and Liverpool. But Chelsea is Roman’s alone. It’s a one-man empire. “What happens if he suddenly dropped dead, as Russian oligarchs have been known to do?” muses the Daily Mail. Dunno. Maybe a family man wily enough to be a billionaire has thought about that made plans?
He’s not dead. He’s “stranded in Russia,” says the Express. It adds that Roman “could become the first major casualty of the tensions since the Salisbury nerve agent attack on Sergei Skripal and his daughter Yulia in March.” Of maybe, you know, he could not.
The Sun makes the link between poison and footy overt in its headline: “Chelsea owner stuck in Moscow after poison row.” But there’s no link between the two things. The headline might just as easily say: “Chelsea owner escapes Wembley bore-fest.”
It’s “Roman’s own goal” in the Mirror. Roman news shares a page with the story “Cut off dirty money, MPs plead” – “Fresh sanctions on Vladimir Putin’s cronies will be urged today to stem ‘dirty money’ harming UK security.” No suggestion whatsoever Abramovich has down anything wrong – other than fund Chelsea, the club that since his investment in 2003 have won 15 trophies. And that’s unforgivable, of course. Still, if could have been worse: he could have bought Spurs.
Posted: 21st, May 2018 | In: Chelsea, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment
Meghan’s spare wedding dress cost £100,000 (or not)
Thomas who? Thomas Markle… Anyone? Having rolled over Megan Markle’s father, the news cycle gets to focus on the honeymoon and the dress. Not that the new Duchess of Sussex’s dress was a surprise to Daily Mail readers who on April 4 got a sneak peak of her walk-on look. Rebecca English told us:
EXCLUSIVE: Meghan’s £100,000 wedding dress revealed: Royal bride will wear hand-stitched, beaded design made by British couturiers Ralph & Russo (and paid for by Prince Harry’s family)
The price then doubled. And the designer changed their name. Although no longer an “exclusive”, the story remained a revelation: “Givenchy’s Clare Waight Keller has been revealed as Meghan’s wedding dress designer.” There had been lots of “speculation” – surely “exclusives”? – with with “Ralph & Russo hotly tipped”:
But if it’s guff you’re after, step forward and take long obsequious bow, Robin Givhan, who writes in the Washington Post:
…what was most noticeable were all the things that the dress was not. It was not a Hollywood red-carpet statement. It was not a Disney-princess fantasy. It was not a mountain of camouflaging tulle and chiffon.
The dress, designed by Clare Waight Keller, was free of extravagant embellishments. It was not covered in yards of delicate lace. It did not have a single ruffle — no pearls or crystals. Its beauty was in its architectural lines and its confident restraint. It was a romantic dress, but one that suggested a clear-eyed understanding that a real-life romance is not the stuff of fairy tales. The dress was a backdrop; it was in service to the woman.
Weekend in Blackpool, right?
Posted: 19th, May 2018 | In: Fashion, News, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment
Meghan Markle: darts walk-on girls and The Naked Rambler should get the nod
As Meghan Markle straps an inflatable bellend to her neck and brandishes Harry’s loyalty card for for the mother of all hen nights at SophistiCats night club, the papers all lead with the “sad” announcement that her dad, the much-maligned Thomas Markle, will no be walking her down the aisle. Who will is the matter of heated debate, the smart money being on the her mother, darts walk-on girls, Naomi Campbell, the Naked Rambler and Ian Botham, should he be seeking a new sponsorship role: it’s £1000-a-yard for charity. (TV executives, call me I have ideas – Sue Perkins presents The Hard Yards, a pro-celebrity walk down the aisle.)
The Sun plan for the next generation
Anyhow, California-gal Meghan stuffed in a plum and issued a statement via the Kensington palace twitter feed: “Sadly my father will not be attending our wedding. I have always cared for my father and hope he can be given the space he needs to focus on his health.” Shades of Adrian Mole’s mother saying she’s “fond” of him. Harry has never met Thomas. But “nothing’s going to spoil our big day,” thunders the Daily Mail’s lead headline – although you’d imagine a few of the paper’s hacks will give it a whirl.
In the Sun there’s lots of gush about Meghan being a “silver-lining girl”as the paper joins “fans” sleeping on the streets of Windsor. Best not get there too early, mind, lest the police give you a kick and move you on. The homeless and rough sleepers have been swept from the town’s streets. “Crazy Corner” looks like the “Calais Jungle”, says the Sun’s man on patio furniture. But there’s no Lily Allen, just people like Skye London – “People call us mad. Well, we are mad but we always gets the best seats” – and Terry Hunt – “I’ve been doing this since I was four. I’m at every wedding and outside the hospital at every birth.”
Posted: 18th, May 2018 | In: News, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment
Prince Harry can’t recall meeting Meghan’s dad Thomas in Toronto?
Time to catch up with Thomas Markle, Meghan Markle’s dad. The Mail says the “virtual recluse” has still to meet Prince Harry. In the build up to the wedding, the Queen will be hosting a do at which Thomas will meet Her Maj and the rest of The Munsters. “Remarkably,” says the Mail, “it will be the first time that Prince Harry will meet his fiancee’s father.”
Aside from Thomas Markle being anything but a recluse, the Mail might care to note on January 4th 2017 we read that Thomas and Harry met in Toronto a while back. And where did we read that news? In the Mail:
Such are the facts.
Posted: 7th, May 2018 | In: News, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment
Transfer balls: Fekir news and Klopp’s Dembele to Liverpool confession
Is the job of a journalist to talk truth to power or to spin a story from ether? The BBC says Liverpool manager Jurgen Klopp “admits he would be interested in Barcelona’s Ousmane Dembele became available”. Admits? It’s a confession that also interests the Sun, which declares: “‘NOW I’M INTERESTED’ – Ousmane Dembele: Liverpool boss Jurgen Klopp admits interest in transfer for Barcelona star.”
Lots of admitting from Klopp in his admiration for a player who joined Barcelona from the German’s former club Borussia Dortmund for £135m. Says the Sun:
…Dembele has been linked with a move away and Klopp got the ball rolling on a deal when asked, after his side’s disappointing loss to Chelsea, that he will be bidding.
It was during the post-match press conference that Klopp was asked about transfers. Had Liverpool signed Lyon captain Nabil Fekir for £60m? “During the game, we agreed a deal?” said Klopp. “I would be surprised about that to be honest. No comment.”
How about Barcelona’s Ousmane Dembele?
“Who was the second name? Dembele? Oooh, is he on the market? Now I am interested!” said Klopp. “I never comment on transfer rumours. I have already said much more than I usually do.”
Klopp laughed off the questions. But tbis is how it a reported in the Mail, Mirror and Express:
Daily Mail: “Jurgen Klopp keen to bring in Barcelona £95m flop Ousmane Dembele.”
Daily Express: “LIVERPOOL boss Jurgen Klopp has confirmed he would love to sign Barcelona star Ousmane Dembele.”
Daily Mirror: “Liverpool ready for talks to sign Barcelona star Ousmane Dembele”
Total balls.
Such are the facts.
Posted: 7th, May 2018 | In: Back pages, Liverpool, Sports | Comment
Right-wing tabloids use Piers Morgan’s impotent tool to bash Diane Abbott
As the Government inches towards its removal targets for people unsuited to their environment – farewell, Amber Rudd – the Press look around for the next scalp. They spot Diane Abbott, the Labour shadow home secretary. The Sun thunders “DIANE DISASTER “, zooming in on Abbott’s “car-crash interview” with TV’s Piers Morgan. Lest the paper’s position be unclear, it adds: “The disastrous interview came after the resignation of Amber Rudd as Home Secretary.”
Says the Sun:
Pressed on the [illegal immigration] issue, Ms Abbott refused EIGHT times to lay out exactly what her solution would be if she got into power.
As ever, the non-event on mid-morning telly between Paxman-lite and Blinky hits Twitter:
Viewers watching will make their own mind up about what you were trying to do. As for me I will keep campaigning for justice, not treating the #Windrush generation and others who have a right to be here as if they were illegal.
— Diane Abbott (@HackneyAbbott) April 30, 2018
The Mail analyses the facts.
Diane Abbott refuses SIX TIMES to say what SHE would do with illegal immigrants in her latest car crash interview
We know journalists are rubbish at sums but surely the Sun and Mail can decide if Morgan repeated himself 6 or 8 times? (The Mirror says it’s 6.) You can watch the video of the chat if you can stand it – but you might wonder if repeating the same line of questioning is more vainglorious balls than an actual attempt to get an answer. But the poor questioning and the non-answer gets the headlines – no fewer than three times on the Daily Express website:
STORY 1: “What is Labour immigration policy? Piers Morgan frustrated as Diane Abbott fails to answer”
STORY 2: “‘You couldn’t give me a straight answer’ Morgan hits back at Abbott after fiery TV clash”
STORY 3: “Piers Morgan Twitter: Good Morning Britain star continues HEATED debate with Diane Abbott”
Good to see the country finally having a sensible debate on immigration – not.
Oh, go on, here it is.
Diane Abbott repeatedly refuses to say what should happen to illegal migrants in car-crash interview with Piers Morgan. https://t.co/f7ayYJ9Gna pic.twitter.com/PjG1MWM18F
— Ben (@Jamin2g) April 30, 2018
Posted: 30th, April 2018 | In: News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment
Daily Mail: not knowing what gives you cancer gives you cancer
Lots of people wrongly believe things like stress, electromagnetic frequencies, microwave ovens, GM foods and drinking from plastic bottles cause cancer. A study in the European Journal of Cancer, by a team from University College London (UCL) and the University of Leeds surveyed 1,330 people in England. Lion Shahab, from UCL, tells media: “People’s beliefs are so important because they have an impact on the lifestyle choices they make.”
Where do people get the idea that all manner of stuff gives you cancer – that disease the slack-jawed and mentally negligible tell us people “battle” (BBC) and “Stand up to” (Channel 4)?
The Daily Mail has seen the research and tells its readers:
Do YOU know what increases your cancer risk? An alarming number of people believe in fake causes – and don’t know about the real dangers…
What are the real dangers?
…many people are still confused about risk factors, despite vast sums being spent on public health education campaigns.
A sizeable minority of the public either fail to appreciate the significance of known risk factors or hold unfounded beliefs about possible causes, such as using mobile phones or being near overhead power lines.
Who to blame for what the lack of knowledge? The Mail warns, “people increasingly getting their news from social media – sometimes from unreliable sources (so-called ‘fake news’).”
Some read the Daily Mail.
Like this – The Daily Mail’s A-Z of Things That Give you Cancer.
Posted: 28th, April 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment
Manchester City’s Raheem Sterling Deserves To Starve
Young gifted and black, Manchester City and England striker Raheem Sterling is a top athlete. But for some reason, he gets singled out for attack. In today’s diatribe, the Mail watches Sterling eat and finds reason to be upset by it. The story is headlined: “Raheem Sterling treats himself to a spot of breakfast after missing out on being crowned Young Player of the Year the night before at PFA awards.” Sterling came third in the poll, losing out to his Man City teammate, the German tyro Leroy Sane.
We don’t get to se what car Sane drove to breakfast the next day, but we are told about Sterling who “was seen in his £120,000 Mercedes G Waggon in Alderley Edge, Cheshire”. Seen? Driving his own “pimped out” car. The car is black and boxy.
The story seems to have been altered to make it look only slightly less weird. It looks like it originally ran:
Raheem Sterling treats himself to a spot of breakfast despite missing out on being crowned Young Player of the Year the night before at PFA awards.
He ate despite losing an award? He really is shameless and lacking in human decency.
And some background on the Mail’s target: “Sterling was born in,Jamaica. At the age of five he emigrated to London with his mother. His dad was murdered in Jamaica when Sterling was nine years old. At age 11, he joined QPR’s Centre of Excellence. And all was good and plucky until he stated to earn money and we were invited to dislike him because of it…
Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook
Posted: 24th, April 2018 | In: Manchester City, Sports | Comment
Salma Hayek dresses like a Daily Mail reader
The hard working Daily Mail Reporter was helping readers sat in their Comfi-Gowns and support stockings identify the “Worst dressed women” at the Oscars.
Eyes are drawn to Salma Hayek, who came as a “Shiny disaster”. Her “dress was baffling to behold… serving as more of an eye sore than a style statement”. What a horror show.
And you too can get the look because just one line down, the same readers are told: “Shimmer in sequins like Salma wearing a Gucci gown… Whoever said sequins can’t be worn all over on a maxi gown must’ve not seen how good Salma Hayek rocked this one at the 2018 Oscars.”
Who said it? The Daily Mail did a moment earlier.
Baffling stuff.
Price on application.
Posted: 14th, March 2018 | In: Celebrities, Fashion, News | Comment
Referees confused over Liverpool v Spurs penalties prove VAR is rubbish
More reaction to Liverpool’s 2-2 draw with Spurs. No VAR was used in the match, which featured two penalties for Spurs. It might have been three pens had the referee not spotted that Dele Alli dived. Liverpool were aggrieved by the decisions. Spurs were elated. Would VAR have helped? Well, that depends on which referee is sat in a sealed box reviewing the action on the telly.
NO pens says retired ref Mark Halsey in the Sun:
“HARRY KANE was in an offside position for the first penalty. Yes, the ball has come off Dejan Lovren before falling to Kane, but the Liverpool defender has tried to clear the ball knowing that Kane is behind him – and not knowing if the Spurs striker is offside or not. So Kane has clearly impacted on the Liverpool man, thus interfering with an opponent. The assistant should have flagged at this point so the Loris Karius foul is immaterial.”
YES pens says former ref Graham Poll in the Mail: “Assistant Eddie Smart got Tottenham’s penalty decisions spot-on… it topped a good afternoon for referee Jon Moss and his officials at Liverpool.”
Well done Eddie Smart. The assistant got involved in both penalty decisions and he was right to do so. For the first penalty, he called for Jon Moss because Harry Kane was in an offside position and Smart could not be clear whether a Liverpool player had touched the ball before the Tottenham striker was fouled.
They discussed the situation and Moss decided that Dejan Lovren had played the ball, which meant Kane was onside before being taken down by Loris Karius…
And then Smart persuaded the referee, deep into stoppage time, to award the second penalty to Spurs.
To the naked eye it looked as if Erik Lamela had dived. People who had seen it numerous times on TV replays could not be sure, but Smart was. And he was right.
YES pens says former ref Dermot Gallagher on Sky:
“In the debrief after the game, they’ll be told that they made the big, match-changing decisions correct on the day.”
NO pens says ref Mark Clattenburg on the Times:First penalty
Pen 1. Was it offside?
This should not have been a penalty because it was offside….Second penalty
Pen 2.
This a tough decision. I believe that there is a suspicion of offside in the build up to the penalty. The ball is touched by Fernando Llorente and into Érik Lamela, who is fractionally offside in my opinion. As we have seen with VAR now, offside is a matter of fact and no benefit is given to the attacking team. Therefore, the penalty should not have been allowed. Once the offside is missed, It looks as though Virgil van Dijk goes to kick the ball and then tries to pull away his leg, but there is a still a bit of contact. It is a soft penalty, but not definitely a wrong call.
Clear as mud, then. Just the way we like it.
Posted: 5th, February 2018 | In: Back pages, Broadsheets, Liverpool, Sports, Spurs, Tabloids | Comment
Why Sanchez gets kicked at Manchester United but not at Arsenal
Jamie Redknapp tells his Daily Mail readers that Alexis Sanchez “was born to play for Manchester United”. After that kind of guff, you know you’re in for a cavalcade of nonsense. And in “kicking little devil Sachez is the only way to stop him!” we get it in spades.
Sanchez is, you will recall, the player so good that he was let got by Barcelona, joining Arsenal, where he thrived, earning plaudits for his dynamism and skill. Now aged 29 and apparently reborn three matches into his new career at Man United, Redknapp is seeking signs of messianic homecoming.
Redknapp says Sanchez has been fouled “15 times” during his United career. That, we’re told, is a foul every 17 minutes. “Against Huddersfield alone he was fouled seven times, the most for a single player in a Premier League game this season.”
Or as the ,er, Daily Mail note in January:
Seven against Crystal Palace, four against West Brom, then three against Chelsea – Jack Wilshere knows how to draw a foul.
But never mind the facts because Redknapp has a to-deadline point to make, asking:
“Are opponents deliberately targeting the Premier League’s best-paid player?”
No, not Wilshere. He’s talking about Sanchez.
Figures have been updated, and Sanchez is now the PL’s fourth most-fouled player (56 times fouled), one ahead of Wilfried Zaha (Crystal Palace; £60,00-a-week) and behind Watford’s Richarlison (Watford; 1st place; £22,000-a-week), Dele Alli (2nd place: Spurs; £50,000-a-week); and Jordan Ayew (3rd place; Swansea City; £50,000-a-week).
Redknapp then gets tautological:
“Players are not going out to kick Sanchez because he earns £350,000 a week. It is simply because nobody can get near enough to get the ball off him!”
But they do get near him. You have to be very near a player to foul someone (unless you’re Dele Alli).
And foul’s only occur when Sanchez isn’t being fairly dispossessed:
32 – Alexis Sanchez has lost possession of the ball more often today than any Manchester United player has in any Premier League game this season. Loose.
— OptaJoe (@OptaJoe) February 3, 2018
Redknapp’s not finished:
“It is no coincidence that Sanchez was fouled just four times in his last three games for Arsenal. His head was turned by the prospect of a move and he lacked the desire to get on the ball”
Arsenal’s farewell performance came as a 66th minute substitute (Chelsea away). The two matches before that he played the full 90 minutes in each (West Brom away and Chelsea at home). Did he lack desire? Sky, which also employs Redknapp, says he was Arsenal’s most vibrant and best player during the Chelsea game. The Mirror says Sanchez “looked dangerous” throughout when Arsenal took on West Brom.
Other highlights from Redknapp’s insightful column: Arsenal need to “build a team who can deliver these wonderful performances every week.” You think?
“Eddie Howe ticks every box” for “any owner” of a top 6 side looking for a manager. Although the boxes marked ‘Big Cups Won” and “Availability” do look a little empty.
Posted: 5th, February 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, manchester united, Sports, Tabloids | Comments (4)
