Posts Tagged ‘David Cameron’
David Cameron Subverted My Scientology Sign
SEE that sign? See the sign of David Cameron subverting a Scientology message? That sign is waiting to be altered to become a new sign. It can be made better. Anorak has trawled the web and now presents the pick of changed signs. Things can be made better – with a pen…
Posted: 28th, April 2010 | In: Strange But True | Comment
Join our Leader’s debate – maybe win £50 worth of Amazon vouchers
It’s the third and final leadership debate and things are really hotting up. Who will be the next PM? Will Nick Clegg retain his golden boy status? Will David Cameron charm his way into Number 10. Or will the old bruiser Gordon Brown cling on to power? Everything is still to play for and with the BBC’s David Dimbleby helming the final debate on the economy it looks like a seriously heavyweight and fascinating contest. One which you too can have your say in by logging in to Gabbit.com (it will only take a few seconds).
Do you think Brown is the right man to lead us out of hard times or do you think it’s time for a change? Just log on to Gabbit.com to have your say along with other viewers. The Prime Ministerial Debate is live on BBC1, Thursday April 29, 8.30pm. www.gabbit.com
We’ll be giving away £50 of Amazon vouchers to the person who comes up with the smartest comments.
Posted: 26th, April 2010 | In: Reviews | Comments (7)
Election In Pictures: David Cameron’s Wedding, Baptism And Bar Mitzvah
ELECTION in pictures: David Cameron was there to see his younger sister Clare marry. First a baby. Then a marriage. If Dave can contrive to have relatives Confirmed, Bar Mitzvahed and Baptised, God will be truly on his side. Clare was marrying market research executive Jeremy Fawcus at St Barnabas Church, Peasemore, West Berkshire. It was billed as a “break from the election campaign trail”, which means the press photocall only went on for ten minutes.
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Elsewhere, former Queen guitarist Brian May speaks at a meeting in Keynsham while lending his support to fellow anti-hunt campaigner Dan Norris, left, who is standing as Labour candidate for North East Somerset.
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Leaders’ Debate Pictures: Gordon Brown Fist Bumps For £250
THE heated debate was great fun. Nick Clegg – aka Dutchman Nick Clogg – said that for £20 (made payable to N. Clegg Inc.) he’d build you a nuclear deterrent fron a old washing up bottle, some foil and a ‘whooshing’ sound; Gordon Brown promised not to smile; and David Cameron put his hair in a bun. Meanwhile, in Bristol, left-wing protestors fought with the English Defence League. They were all rounded up and sent to Iraq…
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David Cameron Wins Mirror’s Game Of Chicken
THE Daily Mirror leads with “CHICKEN HUGGET!”, the story of when the paper’s election chicken met David Cameron. Cameron puts an arm about the bedraggled bird and the Mirror’s Steve Myall writes:
“Mr Cameron then unmasked our reporter and invited him to ask any question he liked – before striding off.”
Or, er, not.
The problem with reporting on an incident that was broadcast on the telly is that we all saw Cameron pull the chicken’s head off, mock him and then invite a question. The chicken remained mute, looking sweaty and flustered.
Eyjafjallajokull Volcano Is Adopted By Dan Snow And David Cameron’s Big Society
LACKING from the Eyjafjallajokull Volcano story was the celebrity element. But news is that old rockers Rick Parfitt and Francis Rossi of Status Quo have been forced to plan a new route home from a Russia tour due to the travel problems caused ash from by the Icelandic volcano. But is that enough? No, what we need is TV show, a TV presenter with a cause. Step forward daddy’s boy Dan Snow her to launch a “Dunkirk-style mission” to bring British ferry passengers across the Channel in a fleet of RIBs.
How many in afleet? Five.
Pictures: Global Warming Caused Eyjafjallajokull Volcano
Snow presents such telly shows as 20th Century Battlefields and Beating Retreat.
Benedict Brogan, the Telegraph’s Deputy Editor then seizes on Snow’s optunism to make his own case for David Cameroan:
Dan Snow’s Dunkirk spirit is what David Cameron’s Big Society is all about
The TV historian’s swashbuckling initiative, intended initially to help a friend, encapsulates everything Dave has been banging on about: self-reliance, group action, charitable motive, improvisation, mucking in, a dash of can-do and a spot enthusiastic amateurism.
So, it’s not about a TV presenter grandstanding and promoting himself?
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Posted: 19th, April 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
A Picture Gallery Of Weird Prime Ministers
NICK Clegg, Gordon Brown and David Cameron – three not-too-bad looking, neat-faced, full-haired, clean-skinned, charm-free, polish-toothed, pink-skinned, suited and booted salesmen. What we want are the real men. Where are they? On the back benches and in the streets. Anorak has been out canvassing for leaders that we can relate to and warm to. Where is the one who says “I am the authentic face of the Britain”? Here’s is a selection of candidates:
Posted: 16th, April 2010 | In: Strange But True | Comments (2)
Debate Round-Up: Gordon Brown’s Pink Tie, Nick Clegg’s Susan Boyle And David Cameron’s Rushmore
DID you see the debate between Nick Clegg, David Cameron and Gordon Brown? Alan Johnson calls it an “acoustic session”. He’s right – the same old songs to a flatter tune. Did you watch it all? Or did you just watch The Good Wife and wait for the pundits and the myriad polls to tell you what went on?
Here’s a round-up of views:
Trevor Kavanagh (Sun): “Mr Brown grinned painfully… Nick Clegg slyly fuelled the rift between the Big Boys. But it was David Cameron who had the audience nodding in agreement”
Daily Mirror: “Brown crushes naive Cameron…”Gordon Brown, in pink ti and blue shirt was statesmanlike…”
The Weirdest And Best General Election Pictures
Bob Roberts (Mirror): “David Cameron was left floundering last night as Gordon Brown repeatedly outsmarted him…”
Tony Parsons (Mirror): “It felt massive. Princess Diana on her wedding day, England in a World cup semi-final…bigger…”
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Posted: 16th, April 2010 | In: Reviews | Comments (5)
Brown, Cameron And Clegg Form A Heated Triangle
THE leaders of the three big parties – Nick Clegg, David Cameron and Gordon Brown – go into the televised debate. The papers trail the event chaired by the unintentionally hilaious Alastair Stewart of Police, Camera, Action fame. Watch out for his frown getting lower as the night wears on and his voice growing more bombastic. The newspapers trail the event on their front pages:
The Indepedent says it’s 90 minutes that “COULD CHANGE BRITIAN”. Of course this is 90 minutes on ITV, so Britain could be changed by adverts for Sky TV and pet insurance.
“Take me to your lectern,” puns the Guardian, which for some reason leads also with a picture of Cherie Blair, presumably to remind readers that whoever wins, at least its not her.
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Posted: 15th, April 2010 | In: Reviews | Comments (4)
Revealed: David Cameron’s Conservative Manifesto Stolen From Student’s Essay
WHEN in 2003, Anorak introduced the Tory Blue Book, we knew that one day David Cameron, an avid reader, would take our words and turn them into great Government. And so it has proved as Dave unleashes the Conservative Party’s 21010 manifesto: The Blue Booklet.
In the interests of history, we one again bring you that story:
AN Essex schoolboy has declared war on progressive education in a pamphlet he believes will fire the imagination of young people everywhere. But his teachers are less enthusiastic, and he has upset some of them with his outspoken views.
“You might laugh now – but giving me a damn good thrashing will only make me stronger,” says Richards
Barry Richards, 16, is a pupil at the Wat Tyler comprehensive in Grays, and a leading member of the Essex Young Conservatives.
His book, The Little Blue Schoolbook, is a riposte to controversial Little Red Schoolbook, which was published in the UK earlier this year. But whereas the original enjoins pupils to organise strikes and demonstrations, Richards version extols the virtues of obedience, patriotism and polished shoes.
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Posted: 13th, April 2010 | In: Key Posts | Comment (1)
The Election In Pictures: Ed Balls Hots Pants’ Lobotomy
THE Election in pictures: April 12, 2010, and Gordon Brown pops on a hard hat; The Conservatives get a lobotomy in Ormskirk, Merseyside; David Cameron is a Chubby chaser; Nick Clegg puckers up; and Vince Cable, the most over-hyped man in the world right now, develops a halo; and Ed Balls hosts off his hot pants…
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The Big Cs: David Cameron Gives You Cancer, Just Like Maggie Did
ANORAK was ahead of the game when we told you that David Cameron’s Conservatives give your cancer. A few days later and news breaks that Labour has sent letters to 250,000 women warning them that the a vote for Dave is a vote for cancer.
Daily Mirror: Tories Give You Cancer And David Cameron’s Bad Hair In Bournemouth
Some recipients already had cancer, probably because Maggie Thatcher gave it to them.
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Posted: 11th, April 2010 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
Labour’s Stuart MacLennan Sacked But David Cameron Not In Coma
GOODBYE Stuart MacLennan. The Labour candidate for the Moray seat in the north of Scotland, has been sacked for offensive posts he made on Twitter. Gordon Brown says MacLennan’s are “unacceptable”. Unless, you’re Stuart MacLennan. As ever the electorate reserve the right to be offended and have the noble elite be offended on our behalves. In other news, no other shocks and David Cameron not in bike accident injury horror…
The General Election In Pictures: David Cameron’s St Custard Belly
SO long as David Cameron doesn’t speak, the Tories will win the election. But the shiny one can’t help himself. Dave wants a “non-military national citizenship service” to “put fire into people’s bellies, steels into their backbones and joy into people’s souls”. Read it back, Dave. If you still don’t think that makes you sound like a character from St Custard’s – perhaps all of them at once – see a doctor urgently…
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Posted: 9th, April 2010 | In: Reviews | Comments (5)
Daily Mirror: Tories Give You Cancer And David Cameron’s Bad Hair In Bournemouth
THE Election campaign is pretty much a scare story rolled out over a month. Today the Daily Mirror brings news that if you vote for the Tories you’ll get cancer. In “RISK OF CANCER CUTS”, readers are told “cancer will claim thousands more lives a years if the Tories abandon early tests for the disease…”
(Rumours are that the Labour Party is sending out flyers to cancer patients warning them that a vote for the Tories is a vote for the Big C.)
This is followed by the Mirror’s news that a woman who lives in Bournemouth will never vote for David Cameron because he’s a “snob with bad hair”. Not that’s she’s a snob, you understand.
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Posted: 8th, April 2010 | In: Reviews | Comments (2)
The General Election In Pictures: Gordon Brown’s Innocent Fruit
ANOTHER day in the General Election race. And a chance to see Anorak’s Daily pictures round-up. David Cameron does working class loaves at Warburton; Gordon Brown does middle class fruit at Innocent; and Nick Glegg holds his nose in Liverpool. And who’s that on the blower?
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The General Election In Pictures: Ed Balls Tucks In
Posted: 8th, April 2010 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
Mark McGowan 10,000 Prostrates Before David Cameron
MARK McGowan plans to prostrate himself 10,000 times in front of a “large photographic image of Conservative leader David Cameron on (election day) May 6th, 2010, opposite number 10 Downing Street.” (Miodrag Gidra Stojanovic is watching.)
He explains:
“The prostrations can be seen as a sign of reverence to a noble man, David Cameron, the man who can lead this country out of the problems we are in. It should take me about two-and-a-half days to complete, I will start at 10am on Thursday 6th May and finish on Saturday 8th May, by which time this country will see a new leader. Gordon Brown, the Labour party and champagne socialism is over.”
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Posted: 7th, April 2010 | In: Strange But True | Comments (3)
In Pictures: David Cameron’s Horrific Near Fatal Bike Crash
THE election is just like the boat race – two teams of privileged elitists moving along a course with the current pushing them along to what the teams hope to be a victory and what everyone else hopes to be a sinking. No boat sank in the boat race this year. But maybe next year. Fingers crossed.
(Gallery at end of story)
We watch the election on the telly in the hope that someone does or says something terrible and sinks, and maybe even drowns. The live debates offer more chance of this. And if Cameron can say he likes sex with ducks, or Gordon Brown can pledge to invade France, the election might spark into life and get us duck fanciers a cause we can get our teeth into.
On the telly, David Cameron is spotted leaving his home on his push bike. He’s not wearing a helmet. Lots of photographers and TV crews get in his path. “Go on, Dave,” they beg. “Fall off. Do a wheelie and fall off. showboat. Fall off. Bang your head. Die. Ok, not die. But come close to dying. Be on life support for a few days. Give us something to talk about and our readers something to feel.”
No luck, though. Dave cycles on. Still, maybe tomorrow.
In the meantime, look what could have happened…
Non PC David Cameron’s Apple Mac And Darts With Samantha
SAMANTHA Cameron is on the Webcameron, David Cameron’s video blog. At Sam & Dave’s house we can see that Dave has an Apple Mac. He really is non-PC Gene Hunt.
And Sam is… Well, Sam is Andy Fordham, the dartist (spotted by the Sun’s Ally Ross). She also speaks with a rhotacism, mirroring that ‘classless’ pronunciation of Jonathan Ross and David Bellamy. Darts and the common voice. Samantha Cameron might yet win the election for Dave – so long as ditches that Apple Mac…
Posted: 6th, April 2010 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)
Cheryl Cole’s August Reunion With Ashley And Those Chuckle Brothers Rumours
STOP press. Having heard from Amanda Holden that Cheryl Cole is “probably” in love with Ashley Cole, heat magazine says the nation’s sweetheart (that’s Chezza – as you were, Amanda) is giving Ashley one “LAST CHANCE”.
Cheryl has set her sights on an “August” reunion. And you can read all about the “SECRET TALKS” inside the mag.
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Posted: 6th, April 2010 | In: Heat, Key Posts | Comments (2)
Vote Labservatice For More Of The Same Cameron – Bown Arrogance
TODAY is the day that the feed-in tariff comes into operation, a bribe to the well-off to install massively inefficient micro-electricity generation which is expected to cost the rest of us £8 billion a year through our electricity bills.
The Conservative response to this lunacy is not only to support it, but to extend it, potentially bringing the annual cost to £60 billion a year.
That, and much more marks out the Conservatives as unfit to govern – an attribute they share with the Labour Party. On all crucial issues, from membership of the EU, to defence, energy, climate change, education, the NHS, the choice is between a Tory train wreck and a Labour train wreck.
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Posted: 2nd, April 2010 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
Cameron’s Conservatives Crowdsource The Bloggers’ Budget As Daily Mirror Loses Influence
TODAY the Daily Mirror presents the most opportunistic, sad, desperate and downright daft headline in the runs up to Labour’s defeat in the General Election, and in the waft of Geoff Hoon, Stephen Byers and Patricia Hewitt’s cash-for-influence scandal:
“SEE YA! (WOULDN’T WANNA BE YA!”
That’s the headline. The news:
“Cheerful David Cameron waves bye-bye yesterday to his chances of being our next Prime Minister.”
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Posted: 24th, March 2010 | In: Reviews | Comments (3)
Basil Brush Predicted David Cameron Would Be Tory Leader: Proof
THE Sun says that the BBC is biased against David Cameron’s Conservatives because they get less screen time than the Labour party and Basil Brush is anti-Dave.
* THE Basil Brush Show featured a school election with a cheat called Dave wearing a blue rosette.
Really…
Then last Sunday BBC2’s Basil Brush Show featured nasty “Dave” – complete with blue rosette. He beat nice Rosie, with a purple rosette, by promising free ice cream but was arrested because it was out of date.
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Posted: 21st, March 2010 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
Robert Mugabe Supports David Cameron’s Tories – Bin Laden Still Floating
ZIMBABWE president Robert Mugabe, 86, wants David Cameron to win the UK’s next General Election according today’s Telegraph and others. Harare’s chieftain said his country would have better relations with London if the Conservatives got in.
“We have always related better with the British through the Conservatives than Labour,” he said. “We have a better chance with David Cameron than with Brown.”
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Conservative Spring Conference: Time To Change Cameron
DAVID Cameron is the shiny marketing man. His voice gets higher the more agitated he becomes. Can eh be prime minsiter? Richard North looks at the matter:
With the latest poll crashing to a two percent lead – the smallest YouGov have recorded since the election-that-never-was back in 2007 – David Cameron is to tell the faithful in Brighton: “My patriotic duty is to get rid of Brown and sort out his mess”.
That is according to The Daily Mail. But what was that about patriotism being the last refuge of the scoundrel? This is the man who sold us out on his EU referendum pledge – hedged with weasel words as it was. And he has the nerve to talk about “patriotic duty”?
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Posted: 28th, February 2010 | In: Reviews | Comments (4)
