Farting man faces ban from County Durham men’s club

THEY are threatening to ban Dave Marriott,  49, from the Grange Villa Workmen’s Social Club, County Durham for flatulence. Not because he’s a prude and against blowing off. It’s because he’s too good at it. As he says:

“I’m not a scruffy man, I’m just afflicted with wind. I only drink two days a week, on a Saturday and Sunday. But if I drink too much on an afternoon then I’m flatulent on an evening and it can be really bad.

“I was brought up in front of the club’s board, which included a couple of my friends, because a few people had been complaining. In fairness it’s not just me, but I’m probably the worst. In the past I’ve actually been awarded pints for clearing a bar at closing time, when the landlord wanted everyone to leave. But I’m not proud of myself and now I’ve received a reprimand and a final warning. If I carry on letting off then I’ll be out.”

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Anorak

Posted: 6th, March 2012 | In: Strange But True | Comments (2)