Posts Tagged ‘Fashion’
Boris Johnson’s daughter in Prada headband storm
When they invented prime ministers, they also created Prime Ministers’ children. Unlike the SADDOS (sons and daughters of stars) who can mime, pose and pout in their instagram branded knickers as they work on their celebrity status, the politicians’ kids can either join the Party or find their own way. Carol Thatcher went into Golliwogs, for her brother Mark it was Africa, and Euan Blair went into the boozer and then vomited over Leicester Square. Lara Walker-Johnson went to Oxfordshire and bought a Prada headband. We know all about her purchase because Laura wrote about for Vogue magazine in a story entitled How Time-travelling To My Teen Wardrobe Helped Me Understand Who I Am Today. It’s the kind of vapid tosh made to reassure the unconvinced that minted toff Meghan Markle’s editing of the expensive magazine that advertises expensive things was not a seismic moment in race relations.
“I’m trying my best not to buy more clothes right now, uncertain about future financial prospects and conscious it isn’t the time to splurge,” says Lara in Oxfordshire. The posh always name the county they’re visiting not the village or town. A town has windows, public transport and numbered doors. A county has sprawling mansions, bridle paths and land. “But, I must confess, I did buy two headbands,” she adds, “one black and fluffy, from Shrimps, and one pink and from Prada – that I’ve been drooling over for months.”
The critics some fast. “Lara who, according to her website, is a fashion writer,” snipes one writer, adding: “I have no idea what her future financial prospects are, but her recent accessories acquisitions make me think that she’ll be okay.” The mind boggles to think what the backstory will do to the bands’ resale value. “In a moment when economic inequality, globally, and in the U.K., has never been more conspicuous – and when so many peoples’ lives are in her father’s hands – I might have kept this confession to myself.”
Two headbands in and Boris Johnson is King Herod.
In the Daily Mirror, Lara’s purchases are given no lesser importance: “Meanwhile, more than 100 NHS and care staff have died after testing positive for COVID-19 – as keyworkers beg the government for more vital PPE to protect themselves on the frontline.”
Meanwhile is the literary split screen. There’s Lara shopping online for fancy goods and a fashion philosophy while below her the huddled masses look up beseechingly and wonder if all this coverage of to-die-for Prada headbands means Lara will never need buy one again, and if they make face masks?
Posted: 29th, April 2020 | In: Celebrities, Fashion, News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment
Accidental Nazi glitter: Tote bag says “my favorite color is Hitler”
The Tote bag says “My favorite color is GLITTER”. Or does it. It looks a lot like the bag says “My favorite color is Hitler”.
Your to buy on the Belle Chic website for the $12.99.
Posted: 30th, July 2017 | In: Fashion, The Consumer | Comment
The Pool Floatie jacket – for people who worry when it rains
The Pool Floatie is a men’s jacket, by Christopher Raeburn. If it rains – and I mean really rains – you’ll be ok.
Posted: 18th, May 2017 | In: Fashion, The Consumer | Comment
King of Thailand threatens to sue Facebook over a video of him in a small yellow crop top
Not long before he became King of Thailand, Prince Maha Vajiralongkorn was on a trip to Munich, Germany. He mooched about a shopping centre with a woman. That’s him in the natty yellow crop top, showing off the tattoos on his tum-tum and back.
Thanks to Somsak Jeamteerasakul, “a prominent Thai historian and critic of the monarchy who lives in France”, the video of Maha’s shopping trip has appeared on Facebook, as The New York Times reports. Apparently, the King has had the video blocked in Thailand. He’s also told Facebook to remove the video or else.
Under the country’s lese-majeste laws, people can be jailed for 15 years for insulting monarchy. But is it an insult merely to show the monarch out and about? And won’t all the cool kids be dressed like this next year?
The video has been blocked in Thailand but was still available outside the country on Tuesday.
Facebook, which opened an office in Thailand in 2015, declined to answer questions about its operations in the country or the pages that the government wants to remove. A spokeswoman, Clare Wareing, said only that the company’s policy was to comply with requests by governments to restrict access to content that officials believed violated local laws.
“When we receive such a request, we review it to determine if it puts us on notice of unlawful content,” Ms. Wareing said in an emailed statement. “If we determine that it does, then we make it unavailable in the relevant country or territory and notify people who try to access it why it is restricted.”
Spotter: The New York Times.
Posted: 17th, May 2017 | In: Royal Family, Strange But True | Comment
The RompHim male romper suit is the stuff of nightmares
Men are in crisis. Following the man bun and undersized jackets that turns young men into Norman Wisdom tribute acts, the latest douchebag style is the male romper suit. Called the RompHim (gerrit?!), this cross between Doris Day’s pastel pyjamas and a baby-gro vomit will turn any man into one of the guys at the frat house.
On Kickstarter, it’s positioned to be the next big thing in frat and post-frat culture. The bros are shot in their natural habitats—drinking beers, going to Coachella, etc.—and in colors close to their hearts. Think pastels, youthful prints, and at least one “America!” riff on the style.
It is, say the creators of this chambray and cotton cry for help , a “revolution” in men’s styling – thus proving that not all revolutions are desirable.
Posted: 17th, May 2017 | In: Fashion, The Consumer | Comment
Evolution of Douchebag Style – the man bun vaper and beyond
Inspired by 100 Year of Beauty, some bright sparks have nailed the running joke of men’s fashion with the “Evolution of Douchebag Style”.
Spotter: BlameItOnTheVoices
Fashion windows: clear knee mom jeans
Are your knees your best feature? Or perhaps you have eyes where your knees are and need to see when you’re wearing trousers? Well – finally! – help is here with ‘Clear Knee Mom Jeans’, the height of peek-a-boo denim fashion.
Clear Knee Mom Jeans from Nordstrom are imported (from where, we’re not sure?):
Slick plastic panels bare your knees for a futuristic feel in tapered and cropped high-waist jeans.
Posted: 13th, March 2017 | In: Fashion, The Consumer | Comment
Buy the cat lady in your life seamless cat printed knickers
The perfect gift for the cat lady in your life crazy cat ladies in your life: cat panties.
Spotter: Stylebrity
Posted: 16th, December 2015 | In: The Consumer | Comment
Murderer and sex offender wants his wig back
Hell To pay
To Brazil, where New Zealander Phillip John Smith has flown whilst on day release from Springhill Prison. Having obtained a passport under his birth name, Phillip Traynor, Smith foxed the CCTV and customs wonks by wearing a toupee as part of his disguise.
He then jetted to Rio de Janeiro, where after eight days on the lam he was nabbed by Brazilian police.
Back in prison, he wants access to his hair.
Hellish toupees
Smith has now asked his lawyer, Dr Tony Ellis, to file a judicial review if Corrections continue to deny him access to the toupee.
“He is upset about it. He took some time and effort to get it in the first place. It was approved by Corrections, and now he is not allowed to wear it,” says Ellis.
Auckland Prison Director Tom Sherlock said Smith was originally granted permission to wear the toupee to assist with his reintegration while on temporary releases. Because Smith was not longer eligible for temporary release, access to the item had been revoked. “A hairpiece is not an authorised item in prison, special permission must be granted by the prison director,” he said.
“As his circumstances no longer require the use of a hairpiece, approval has not been granted.”
Ellis is outraged:
“If he is entitled to it when he is released, why is it different in the prison? It’s is a grossly unfair punishment. They need too give it back, and stop messing about.”
Sociologist Greg Newbold from Canterbury University said not allowing Smith his hairpiece was impinging on his human rights. “It seems like pure vindictiveness on the part of Corrections. He is still entitled to be treated as a human being.” Newbold said it appeared as if Smith was being punished for wearing the toupee when he escaped. “It looks like a punitive measure to me, and it’s completely inappropriate.
“I don’t see any reason why a person should not be allowed a toupee in prison.”
However, Garth McVicar from the Sensible Sentencing Trust said Smith was in prison to be punished, not pampered. “I think that it is absolutely ludicrous. It is another example of our ridiculous offender-friendly, criminal-centred justice policy coming back to bite us,” he said. McVicar said he supported the protection of human rights within prisons, but Smith’s plea was going too far. “I wonder why on earth as a nation we are bending over backwards to make sure these offenders have these rights. I am all for having the right to survive and not be threatened, but this is going too far,” he said. Smith will go on trial in January to face charges of fraudulently obtaining a passport and escaping custody.
Posted: 7th, November 2015 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment
Terrible fashion: the BlueBella ‘Unwrap Me’ Body Bow £16.00
BlueBella ‘Unwrap Me’ Body Bow
Women are being old the BlueBella ‘Unwrap Me’ Body Bow for £16.00.
Body Bow by BlueBella
Satin ribbon
Oversized design
Can be tied in a number of ways
Presented in a mesh gift pouch
Hand wash
100% Polyester
What other ways can it be tied?
ABOUT BLUEBELLA
British lingerie label BlueBella was founded with a mission to inspire female confidence.
And it’s not the only one.
If one day your self-esteem is low, putting this on will help it rise and rise.
But only if you pull the bow up very, very tight to your chin.
Posted: 16th, September 2015 | In: Fashion, Reviews, The Consumer | Comment
You can buy a hat for your man bun
The man bun hat “unites the best of contemporary styles in hair and hats for young men,” says the fashionaista at Capitol Hill Seattle, notes Rob Beschizza.
Not yet available as a tattoo.
Spotters: Stylite, Dan Savage
NHS nurses ordered to wear the right socks or else
What colour are the wrong socks? That question to readers of the BExhill-ion-Sea Observer, which reports on East Sussex Healthcare NHS Trust’s decree that staff could face disciplinary action because of the colour of their socks.
The Trust’s uniform policy says sock must be plain and muted in colour. But staff at Eastbourne DGH and Conquest Hospital in Hastings are ordered to wear matching black socks.
Is black muted? Black is the colour of death and misery. Why not brightly coloured socks? What does the Trust have against them?
And why can’t female nurses wear black seamed stockings, like in the the Carry On films?
A staff member wonders:
“Coloured socks don’t affect how efficient we work. Most of us wear trousers that mean you can’t even see the socks – has there actually been any complaints from patients or relatives about our socks if they are visible? What happens if we refuse to lift up our trouser leg? They’ll be asking to check the colour of our underwear next. We’re not stupid – we won’t come into work wearing a dress with bright coloured socks pulled up to our knees. When we wear dresses, we wear tights and look professional and approachable to those who come first – our patients.”
Alice Webster, Director of Nursing, responds: “No member of staff has been disciplined for the colour of their socks.”
But if they do wear red ones, well, they’re asking for it.
For sale: kinky pagan leggings with hoofs
Blair Ondria’s Etsy shop Chaos Costume gives you the chance to dress like an extra from the Lion The Witch & The Wardrobe.
“The construction of these hooves will be of high strength resin fused to a heelless 4 inch shoes. The arch is rigid plastic, and does not bend, so it keeps that beautiful silhouette, effortlessly.”
Are they comfortable?
Q: How hard are these to walk in?
A: Not very – if you’ve walked in stiletto heels, it’s about like that. They are very easy to move in, and do not roll-back easily.
Tails are optional.
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Posted: 20th, August 2015 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment
The cowboy sandal is impetigo for your feet
The Cowboy Sandal is the work of Scotty Franklin of Springfield, Missouri. For $50– yeah, you pay him! – Scotty will distract attention from your terrible hair, chronic impetigo and that carbuncle on your forehead by getting everyone to stare at your feet.
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Posted: 15th, June 2015 | In: Fashion, The Consumer | Comment
The knitted goat balaclava is finally here
Calling all Satanists with complexes, Jimmy Savile look-alikes and everyone tired of wearing small, chaffing skull masks: we give you the Goat Balaclava.
Well, not give exactly. The goat balaclava retails at £66.39.
Made from reassuringly demonic acrylic, the Goat Balaclava is versalite, as this model demonstrates:
Spotter:
Posted: 23rd, February 2015 | In: Fashion, The Consumer | Comment
Brendan Jordan arrives: the gayest boy in the world advertises for American Apparel
Your hero in the above video is Brendan Jordan, the 15-year-old lurker who seized his chance when local news filmed in his area.
Said Master Jordan:
“I just saw a camera, and did my thing. I was imagining myself as if I were Lady Gaga, and that no one could destroy me.”
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Artist Turns Heavy Metal T-Shirts Into Hadnmade Quilts
IN San Francisco, artist Ben Venom recycles heavy metal t-shirts into handmade quilts.
Metal fans hould enjoy looking for familiar looking swatches:
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Urban Outfitters Sells Kent State University Dead Student Fashions
URBAN Outfitters is delling a sweatshirt “Vintage Kent State Sweatshirt”. It’s splattered in red blotches that look a lot like blood stains.
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Zara Sells Holocaust-Inspired Fashion For Children
ZARA is selling a “striped ‘sheriff’ T-shirt” for junior police.
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Video: ‘Electronic Makeup’ Completely Transforms This Model’s Face
THIS is a great video of Nobumichi Asai‘s projection mapping of “electronic makeup” applied to a model’s face.
Asai used Omote, a combination of real-time face tracking and projection mapping to transform a model’s face into mesmerizing patterns.
via Gizmodo and h/t Alice Lowe
Posted: 19th, August 2014 | In: Fashion, Technology | Comment
Slacks Relapse: A Look At Chick Pants Of The 1970s
OTHER than a brief Capri pants fad during the early Sixties, women rarely wore pants in public. It was dresses and skirts only. Then the Women’s Liberation movement hit its stride in the Seventies, and the ladies started to get in on the pants action. Just as the miniskirt had been a proclamation of the youth culture, pants became a proclamation of gender equality. If men can wear hideous corduroy bell-bottoms, by God, the women can too!
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Posted: 22nd, April 2014 | In: Fashion, Flashback, Key Posts | Comments (3)
London’s New ‘Neo-Nazi Outfitter’ Thor Steinar Doesn’t Sell Black Shirts
WHAT do bigots wear? A branch of the German fashion label Thor Steinar has opened in Finchley, north London.
Hope Not Hate says the label is the “favoured brand of hardline right wingers in Germany”.
The JC notes that “the brand’s original logo resembles the insignia of the SS under Hitler”.
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1903: Girlie Mag Vanity Fair Profiles ‘The Bifurcated Girls: Gay Girls In Trousers’
IN 1903, The Commonwealth Publishing Company of New York City’s magazine Vanity Fair (no, another one; this one ran from February 1902 to April 1904) produced the article on The Bifurcated Girls: Gay Girls In Trousers.
Dian Hansen notes inHistory of Men’s Magazines:
While France had a well-established men’s magazine industry by 1900, America was just showing its ankles in 1903. A magazine called Vanity Fair (unrelated to the current incarnation) was the raciest thing around, and rooming house loozies the hotties of the time. In this New York, tabloid girls who drank like men might strip down to their petticoats and fall into bed together, exposing their corset cover and stockings to peeping male boarders. The famously loose morals of stage actresses made them popular subjects for these shenanigans, but the biggest thrill of all was bifurcation. “What?” one may well ask. Bifurcation, meaning “split in two”, referred to the contours of a woman’s legs revealed by her donning men’s trousers. Bifurcation was a regular and very popular feature in Vanity Fair, it’s popularity leading to Vanity Fair’s Bifurcated Girls.
Posted: 8th, April 2014 | In: Fashion, Flashback, Key Posts | Comment
