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Posts Tagged ‘Food’

Jamie Oliver’s Blitzkrieg on your pizzas

Oi, fatso. Make that, oi, fatso suspect – put that box of fried chicken down and step away. News is that Britain needs to go on a diet – and it’s not one of lard, dripping and sugar. Public Health England (PHE) chief executive Duncan Selbie tells us: “Children and adults routinely eat too many calories, and it’s why so many are overweight or obese.”

If you eat more than you need you get fatter. Who knew?


Jamie Oliver knows more about you than you do


But what does it have to do with him? Lots, apparently. PHE says all fast food should contain 20 per cent less calories. PHE says if we don’t do as it wants us to, it will ask the government to re-introduce rationing. It won’t happen? You sure about that? The tax on sugary drinks is introduced next month.

Dr Alison Tedstone, PHE chief nutritionist, adds: “The evidence is clear that just telling people what to do won’t work. To reverse what’s been decades in the making, we need sustained action across the factors driving poor diets and weight gain.”


The British Minister for Food between April 1940 and 11 November 1943, Lord Woolton, receiving a cup of tea from a mobile canteen.

The British Minister for Food between April 1940 and 11 November 1943, Lord Woolton, receiving a cup of tea from a mobile canteen.


It’s Woolton Pie for all, you know, the pastry dish of vegetables dished up to suffering Britons in the Second World War when rationing was a necessity for all but the rich and royal. Frederick Marquis, 1st Lord Woolton (1883–1964), gave full throat to his love of the low-everything dish after he became Minister of Food in 1940. Was it liked? The Times noted that Woolton went full Jamie Oliver:

When Woolton pie was being forced on somewhat reluctant tables, Lord Woolton performed a valuable service by submitting to the flashlight camera at public luncheons while eating, with every sign of enjoyment, the dish named after him

And right on cue is our Own Minister of Fat Jamie Oliver to tell The Times: “When you get trapped in the disadvantaged cycle, the concept of middle-class logic doesn’t work. What you see is parents who aren’t even thinking about five fruit and veg a day, they’re thinking about enough food for the day… We can’t judge our equivalent of logic on theirs because they’re in a different gear, almost in a different country.”

Poor of taste and poor of intellect. Let’s colonise these cultural pygmies now. These Untermensch need schooling with new laws and restrictions. Thankfully, the minted Oliver and his elite sponsors will invade zis other country and teach the Britishers vat ist best fur zem. Grab your vegetables and zet zer blender to Blitzkerig! It’s war.


Posted: 12th, March 2018 | In: News | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Public Health England wants a return to rationing

This photo shows customers lining up for sugar at an unknown location during rationing in 1943.


England is making moves to control your insides. The Indy has news for people who like food and freedom. The Government wants to monitor your shopping bags:

Public Health England (PHE) is demanding a “calorie-cap” on supermarket ready meals and fast food dishes.

Can that be enforced? Public Health England says it works so that “the healthier choice becomes the default choice”. PHE wants to order chefs to change ingredients, reduce sugar, fat and salt from dinners; or bring back rationing, albeit only for the well-fed and ‘too fat’. We’ve never had it so good, so let’s have less of it.

The suggested ruling, which may come into effect in March, would limit breakfasts to 400 calories and lunches and dinners to 600 each.

May or may not. The paper fails to say under what powers PHE can make such a ruling.

Alison Tedstone, chief nutritionist at PHE, tells The Times. “This is all about things like pizzas and readymade sandwiches. We will need to set out guidelines and, I suspect, a series of calorie caps.”

So the Indy was wrong. There will be no rules. The Indy doesn’t bother to check its story, preferring to hype the news it read in another paper. Compare and contrast the Indy’s and the Times’s opening lines:

The traditional January detox when Britons stop drinking and start dieting could last all year under new government health guidelines. – Times

The ubiquity of new year diets and detoxes could extend beyond January and last all year – Indy

It’s worth looking at what PHE does. This from the ‘About’ section on its website:

We are responsible for:

making the public healthier and reducing differences between the health of different groups by promoting healthier lifestyles, advising government and supporting action by local government, the NHS and the public

We are an executive agency of the Department of Health, and a distinct organisation with operational autonomy to advise and support government, local authorities and the NHS in a professionally independent manner.

PHE can’t make rules. Buy it can try to justify it existence with a spot of PR that, as ever, tells us how to behave.

Posted: 15th, January 2018 | In: Broadsheets, News | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

To all the fat nurses everywhere: keep taking the sugar

After a lengthy stay in hospital, I was advised by a charming, caring and professional nurse to go out for ice-cream and champagne. She told me this as we chatted over a huge plate of biscuits and sugary tea. I felt instantly better. But sugar is taboo at an NHS hospital in Greater Manchester. Staff are being weaned off the stuff.

Karen James, Chief Executive Tameside hospital, says: “My staff work very hard. Long hours and shift patterns often make it very difficult for people to make healthy choices, so they opt for the instant sweet fixes, which until now have been readily available. These are dedicated healthcare professionals who believe they should be role models for their patients but the food environment has been working against them.”

Role models? I just wanted the nurses to give me the right drugs at the right time and stay wake.

“We’ve taken away the sugary drinks, we’ve taken sugary snacks out of vending machines, we’ve taken away cookies and muffins and replaced them with fruit,” thunders Amanda Bromley, director of human resources at Tameside “You’d go to the till and there’d be a Twix and a Bounty bar staring back at you. People are working long shifts and if things are in front of them we know they are going to reach for them.” Adding: “Nurses and other health professionals need to be leading by example. They need to be role models for patients.”

“If someone is visibly overweight people don’t necessarily trust that advice. The public expect nurses to be role models,” says Richard Kyle, of Edinburgh Napier University, who led a recent study to find measurements on people working in health professions, and found them to be as obese as the rest of us. “It’s a priority of Simon Stevens [head of NHS England] that the NHS should be an exemplar, have a better proportion than the general population.”

So the vending machines have been cleansed.

The Times has more:

Simon Stevens, chief executive of NHS England, is planning to ban the sale of sugary drinks in hospitals this summer if on-site shops cannot get them down to under 10 per cent of sales.

Maybe the shops can sell other stuff to get the higher-spending punters in, like running machines and cannabis, say.

He is also imposing calorie caps on sandwiches, crisps and chocolate to fight a “snack culture that is causing an epidemic of obesity, preventable diseases, tooth decay, heart disease and cancer”.

After so much PR guff – and the message to nurses to buy cheaper multi-pack of snacks at the supermarket – one thing is missing for the table: hospital food is disgusting. On my first night on the ward I was fed a baked potato with more ‘eyes’ than a Piers Morgan column. Thankfully, I had a someone who bring in fresh and edible food. And when I felt like a pick me up, well, the nurse was always there with biscuits. I can’t recall her weight, BMI or vital statistics, largely because I didn’t give a shit. But next time I’ll be sure to check as I seek her views on religion, politics, investment strategies and other things that I need from her to make sense of my own life.

Posted: 10th, January 2018 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The ultimate egg braking machine

All I want for Christmas is the ‘Egg Breaker eight line RZ-8, Wybijarka ośmiorzędowa RZ-8 OVO-TECH’:


Posted: 23rd, December 2017 | In: Technology, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Donald Trump ate my bomb and other dinners

If we are what we eat, news that Donald Trump eats McDonald’s interests us. You might suppose it’s a clear sign that Trump is of the people. No, not at one with the abstemious dieters and juicers; rather allied to the fat Untermensch who like fast food.  It might also indicate that if you put his name on something he has to have it.

Trump’s former campaign manager Corey Lewandowski and aid David Bossie, have written a book about working with the President. Just as it is with showbiz weddings in OK! magazine and death row prisoners’ last rights, we want to know about the eats. “Trump’s appetite seems to know no bounds when it comes to McDonald’s, ” they write “with a dinner order consisting of two Big Macs, two Filet-O-Fish, and a chocolate malted.”


They continue: “On Trump Force One there were four major food groups: McDonald’s, Kentucky Fried Chicken, pizza, and Diet Coke.”

Fried food chased down by the lo-cal beverage. The man can be restrained.

As Melania Trump watches her man eat and eat and eat from behind dark glasses, her nails taping on the ceiling of Air Force One as if if counting heartbeats, we read that the plane’s galley is “stacked with Vienna Fingers, potato chips, pretzels, and many packages of Oreos”.

Double deelish.

But hold on. James Hamblin looks into the entrails of Trump’s lunch and sees the whole man. Writing in the Atlantic, he opines:

Decisions to live this way would seem to offer insight into Trump’s ability to assess risk. In light of a nuclear standoff with North Korea, rapidly warming oceans, and a looming tax bill that would leave millions more Americans without health insurance, his approach to self-maintenance is not reassuring.

Vote for the vegetarian, right.

Posted: 6th, December 2017 | In: News, Politicians, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Venezuela should breed pigeons and leave rabbits alone

Crisis in Venezuela. A Mis-managed economy has created poverty from riches.

Venezuela’s government has urged citizens to see rabbits as more than “cute pets” as it defended a plan to breed and eat them – even as the opposition says this would do nothing to end chronic food shortages.

The questions must be: what do you feed the rabbits; and how do you cook them?


rabbits venezuela


President Nicolás Maduro went on telly to tell the people that “for animal protein, which is such an important issue, a ‘rabbit plan’ has been approved because rabbits also breed like rabbits”.

As we’ve noted, its not rabbits you need, it’s pigeons, feral ones. In Exeter, England, vagrants are catching the vermin for food. It turn out that when you kill a feral pigeon, more replace it. As  Trafford Council notes:

…for most pigeon problems, lethal methods are totally ineffective. They simply reduce competition for food and shelter, and the remaining birds increase their breeding rates to compensate. Although there is an immediate decrease, numbers soon recover, resulting in an endless cycle of killing and re-population.

And eating, too.

And there’s another problem with rabbits: they are adorable. Mr Freddy Bernal, the country’s minister of urban agriculture, says that lots of rabbits were given to communities to breed for food.  “A lot of people gave names to the rabbits, they took them to bed,” says Mr Bernal.

And lots more can go wrong when you rear rabbit. “Rabbits were introduced to Australia as part of a broad attempt by early colonists to make Australia as much like Europe as they possibly could,” says Greg Mutze, research officer at the Department of Water, Land and Biodiversity Conservation in South Australia. “It was hoped that they would flourish so that the owners could hunt them.” By the 1920s, Australia’s rabbit population had reached to 10 billion.

And, boy, do they eat a lot.

Forget rabbits. Go for pigeons.

Posted: 15th, September 2017 | In: News, Politicians, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

New study links fast food to fat

Can it proven that fast food makes you fat? Researchers at the University of the West of England (UWE Bristol) examined 1,500 state primary school pupils aged four to 11, looking at their postal addresses and weight. Turns out that the kids living closer to fast food outlets – within around half a mile – were more likely than their peers to gain weight during the primary school years.

This is, of course, all about protecting children from being fat – a physical state that once marked you as jolly but now casts you as a mentally negligible victim.

So can it proven that fast food makes you fat and is a danger to children’s health? Or is this more about correlation than causation? Poorer people eat the most fast food. Relocate the eateries, or make them sell just salads and watch the fatties slim down. Or better yet, turn the fried chicken shacks into gyms and therapy suites.

And what of the business angle? If you’re going to open a fast food franchise or fish and chip restaurant, you’ll do best locating where poorer people live and the rents are cheaper. Unsurprisingly, the study noted a higher density of fast food outlets – i.e. cheap food – in poorer areas.

In July, Cambridge University’s Centre for Diet and Activity Research counted 56,638 takeaways in England. And it too noted that fast food shops are more prevalent in England’s poorest areas.

NHS employee Matthew Pearce, who led the research, tells media: “We know from national data that the number of children classified as obese doubles between the first and last year of primary school. Understanding the reasons for this is important to protect the future health of children. Obesity is driven by many complex factors. Our study adds to existing evidence that the neighbourhood environment plays an important role in the development of obesity.”

“While ultimately it is down to individuals on how they choose to live, it is widely accepted that we live in environments that make managing our weight increasingly difficult,” Pearce adds. “We therefore need national and local policymakers to take decisions that support more favourable conditions that enable people to eat healthier and become more physically active.”

So what’s the plan, then? Put simply: tell the idiots how to live. Much harder to implement is the other plan: let’s get richer.

Spotter:  Journal of Public Health.


Posted: 11th, September 2017 | In: News, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

No greens: the fabulous automatic tomato picker gif

Posted: 29th, August 2017 | In: Gifs, Technology | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Police find 30 eyeballs in man’s anus

anal eyeballs


Having stopped a car being driven by Roy Tilbott, 51, Wyoming police spotted a few eyeballs on the road close to where the suspect was standing. They seemed to have have slid down from somewhere inside Tilbott’s shorts.

When challenged at gunpoint, Tilbott told police the eyeballs were not human, rather cow eyeballs he’d stolen from Johnson Meats (a slaughterhouse) where he worked as a butcher.

“Company won’t let us take animal scraps home and instead toss them in the landfill,” said Tilbott according to the police report. “They’re a very wasteful company. We should be allowed to take scrap meat and other parts home. The company should start a green initiative. They don’t even have recycling at the plant. I enjoy eating bovine eyeballs and smuggling them out in my colon was the only way I knew how to get them out without potentially getting caught and fired. I put them in soups. They’re beneficial for erectile dysfunction, which I currently battle, but I also just like the texture and taste.”

Tilbott was breathalyzed and arrested for driving under the influence. He was also in possession of a number of large carving knives. Police don’t know what else to charge Tilbott with because no theft has been reported.

File under: no kebabs in Wyoming?

Posted: 27th, July 2017 | In: Key Posts, News, Strange But True | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Frankie Doodle Dandy: All the pizazz of the Fourth of July

Frankie Doodle Dandy wishes you a happy Independence Day.


frankie Doodle Dandy


Sitting on a blanket of American cheese, he rides in on a toasted English. He’s a Swift Premium Frank. All-American. All-delicious. He’s made with delicious cuts of meat. But not a speck of filler. And all the pizazz of the Fourth of July. In Regular or Beef.

Make Frankie Doodle Dandy by splitting Swift Premium Franks. Dip into boiling water until “arm & legs” spread. Build sandwich and top with frank. Wrap in foil and grill for 10 minutes. Decorate as pictured.

Happy Independence Day!

Posted: 4th, July 2017 | In: The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Twin Peaks: the recipe for cherry pie

twin peaks cherry pie recipe


The Recipe

8 inch Crust: 1-1/2 c. flour, 1/2 c. Crisco, 1/4 c. ice water

Mix flour and Crisco with fork. Add ice water. Mix with your hands. When blended, roll into ball and refrigerate overnight. To roll out: flour both rolling pin and flat surface, split ball in two, roll out 1/2 to fit pan and 1/2 for lattice.

Filling: 3 c. cherries (pitted, sour frozen); 1 c. water; 1c. Baker’s sugar; 4 T. cornstarch; 1/8 t. salt

Thaw cherries at room temp and strain (yields 2 c. juice). Taste for sweetness, more/less sugar may be needed. Add 1 c. water to make 3 c. juice (reserve 1 c. juice for cornstarch mix). Dissolve cornstarch in 1 c. juice, stir with whip. Combine 2 c. juice, 2/3 c. sugar, salt, and bring to a boil. Add cornstarch mix, cook until clear, about 5 min. (if cooked to long, syrup gets gummy). Remove from heat, stir in 1/3 c. sugar (blend thoroughly). Pour mixture over cherries, fold with wooden spoon, cool (stir mix while cooling to prevent scum from forming on top). Pour mix in pie shell. Top completed pie with lattice crust.

Bake @ 425 degrees for 35-40 min.

Spotter: Lynch Net:

Posted: 27th, May 2017 | In: The Consumer, TV & Radio | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Eating more salt makes you less thirsty and burns fat

Eating salt is bad for you. So goes the message that has been hammered into us for an age. Salt improves the taste of things but a cost to your health. Eating too much salt means dying younger. But more research tells us that science is not settled. This is true to such a degree that we know learn that eating salt makes us less thirsty.

The New York Times reports:

The crew members were increasing production of glucocorticoid hormones, which influence both metabolism and immune function.

To get further insight, [Dr. Jens Titze, now a kidney specialist at Vanderbilt University Medical Center and the Interdisciplinary Center for Clinical Research in Erlangen, Germany] began a study of mice in the laboratory. Sure enough, the more salt he added to the animals’ diet, the less water they drank. And he saw why.

The animals were getting water — but not by drinking it. The increased levels of glucocorticoid hormones broke down fat and muscle in their own bodies. This freed up water for the body to use.

But that process requires energy, Dr. Titze also found, which is why the mice ate 25 percent more food on a high-salt diet. The hormones also may be a cause of the strange long-term fluctuations in urine volume.

Scientists knew that a starving body will burn its own fat and muscle for sustenance. But the realization that something similar happens on a salty diet has come as a revelation.

Eat what you like, then.


salt safe

Posted: 10th, May 2017 | In: Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

The Nomadic Gardener: this man will hire your garden to grow his vegetables in


Jim Kovaleski is the nomadic gardener, a doyen of “portable farming” at one point he hies your garden to grow his produce in.

This nomadic gardener travels between Maine to Florida gardening leased front yards. With a frugal lifestyle and revenues as high as $1.5K a week, he’s living the dream.

It’s win-win. You rent out your land for an itinerant worker to farm. You, the gardener and your land become useful and profitable parts of society. If the price of land is lowered because of this new industry, then good. Landu s the largest inout cost. Reduce that and we should rejoice.

Spotter: Kottke

Posted: 4th, May 2017 | In: Money, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

F.T. Marinetti’s Futurist Cookbook: the recipe for every faddish dinner you’ve ever had

Faddish, modish food was played with brilliantly in 1932, when Italian futurist Filippo Marinetti (1876–1944) published Marinetti’s Futurist Cookbook, a cookbook that would trigger a “revolution of cuisine”. Humans, said Marinetti, “think, dream and act according to what they eat and drink”.


futurist-cookbook FT MArinetti


The introduction is choice:

Contrary to the predictable criticisms, the Futurist culinary revolution, illustrated in this volume, is aimed at the high end, noble and useful at all to radically change the power of our race, fortifying, dynamizing and spiritualizing it with brand new dishes in which experience, intelligence and imagination economically replace the amount, the banality, repetition and the cost. Our futuristic kitchen, set like a seaplane engine for high speeds, will seem crazy to some trembling and dangerous traditionalist. It wants to eventually create a harmony between the palate of men and their lives today and tomorrow… It is optimism at the table.

Suzanne Brill notes:

Futurist food was full of suggestiveness and provocation. Sex was one topic, the thrill of air travel another. Along with recipes for “Sculpted Meat” and “Man-and-Woman-at-Midnight” came whole scenarios for acting out themed meals while sitting in a biplane. The art chefs of our day, Heston Blumenthal and Ferran Adrià, surely perpetuate what Marinetti began.

By way of a taster, here’s the recipe for The Excited Pig: A “whole salami, skinned” is cooked in strong espresso coffee and flavored with eau-de-cologne.”

Spotter: Flashbak, which has a lot more on FT Marinetti’s recipe book.

Posted: 1st, May 2017 | In: Books, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Outrage! Muslim finds pork in non halal Whitbread pub dinner

Big news on the Sun’s cover is that teetotal Muslims who eat at Brewer’s Fayre and Whitbread Inn pubs will be “outraged” to learn their beef lasagne contains pork. How many Muslims are shocked, dismayed and angered by the presence of non-kosher meats in their non-halal stomach liner could run into the single digits.

The cheesy beef lasagne is, we’re told, 8.5 percent beef and 4.5 per cent pork.

The meal is made by Creative Foods in Flint, Wales. The Sun recalls that in 2013 Creative “sold lasagne containing horse DNA to Whitbread”. Which, as any Italian will tell you, made it pretty authentic.

Posted: 10th, January 2017 | In: Strange But True, Tabloids, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Dog passes the fermented herring test (video NSFL)

This is a Not Safe For Lunch video of a dog being treated to its first encounter with fermented herring:


Malin Jonsson from Umeå in northern Sweden spotted her French bulldog, six-year-old Ella, begging for food during a recent surströmming party.  But after only sniffing a piece of the fermented herring offered to her, the pet seemed to speak for many people with the way she reacted.  “Eating surströmming is an important tradition in my northern family this time of the year. I have an older bulldog, Ernst, who is an avid surströmming lover and shares the delicacies with us every year. When Ella had been begging loudly for a while she got the chance to taste it. We know how strong the craving can be,” she said. “I was very surprised by her reaction. I had expected that she would enjoy it, obviously,” Ella added.


fermented herring dog


Posted: 20th, August 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Monks release 600lbs of restaurant lobster back into the ocean

“If your loved ones were in this situation, what would they like you to do? ” asks Venerable Dan of the Great Enlightenment Buddhist Institute Society. As you look at Aunt Maud and wonder how chewy she might be after she’s been boiled alive, know that Venerable Dan and his fellow monks bought 600lbs of lobster from a fisherman, said Buddhist prayers over the creatures and returned them to the seas off the coast of Prince Edward Island, Canada.


lobster release prayer


“Hopefully, we can find a spot where there are no cages waiting for them,” said Dan. And maybe they’ll be lots of crabs for the lobsters to eat. (Who will think of the crabs?!)

“We respect everyone’s dietary choice, so we’re not doing this to convert everybody to be vegetarians or vegans. This whole purpose for us is to cultivate this compassion toward others,” he adds.

“It doesn’t have to be lobsters, it can be worms, flies, any animals, drive slower so we don’t run over little critters on the street.”

Fly farmers, to Prince Edward Island. The market is booming.

PS: Says Dan: “Fishermen actually found us a better place to release the lobster so they won’t be captured again.”

Hey, if you can’t trust a lobster fisherman to recycle lobsters, who can you trust? (You people are such cynics.)

Posted: 11th, July 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Man finds ‘something from the Bible’ in his Costo salad

costco locust“We put the bag in the fridge straight away and had our first serving on Saturday night,” says Ian Lovejoy to the Henley Standard.

“It’s horrible to think about that now because it pooed everywhere and we were left wondering what we’d eaten. We decided to have the rest on Sunday but when I dropped the leaves on my plate I just saw this thing in my hand. I thought, ‘what on earth is this?’.

“It frightened me to death and my wife was extremely upset. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life.

“I could probably have coped if it was something small, like an ant, but this was more like something from the Bible. I can’t believe it was still alive after all that time in the bag, first on the shelf and then in our fridge.

“It’s worrying because the bag says the salad’s ready washed but they obviously haven’t cleaned it that well. When the shock had passed we just had some cheese sandwiches… I’d like to think the locust might go to an insect expert who can find a use for it.”

That salad sounds revolting – even a locust won’t eat the stuff.


Posted: 8th, June 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Kettle Chips: the reason they taste like plastic

Is this why newer sort of crisps are so firm? All newspaper tells us:

Kettle Chips are being recalled amid fears packs might contain pieces of plastic that look similar to the crisps.

But do they taste the same as the new thicker style of crisps?

Posted: 4th, February 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Wotsits: the tabloids’ favourite fat snack



The Sun newspaper loves Wotsits and those people who eat the cheesy puffs.


I’ve lived on Wotsits and chocs for 12yrs – 2008

Back then we met Rachel Scowcroft, 12, who had eaten one hot meal in her life: “her nightly dinner of Rice Krispies covered in melted chocolate.”

Rachel said:

“It’s not that I’m trying to be awkward. But whenever I try new food I get scared. I don’t like anything that’s not crunchy – or anything that’s too crunchy.”


You silly bunch of wotsits! – 2006

MUM Hilary Buckland has blasted a council which fined her £75 for dropping a Wotsit snack out of her car window.


Wotsit all about? James Corden has not let U.S. success stop the snacking – 2015

Says TV’s James:

“There’s a British shop two minutes away from my house. I go in and they’re holding a bag of Wotsits for me.”


Bigfoot ate my Wotsit! – 2015

The Sun cheated a little. This was no Wotsit:

Twice divorced Adam Davies – a former call-centre worker turned monster detective [!!!!] –  has spent almost 20 years and £60,000 tracking the hairy knuckle-dragger across the globe without ever once catching sight of him. If only he hadn’t gone to his tent when the monster dropped by for a Cheeto – a US snack similar to a Wotsit.


I hit 20st scoffing 10,000 bags of Wotsits and giant choc bar every day for 5 years – 2016

Meet Jo HUMPAGE (our capital letters.) Says Jo Humpage:

“When I nipped to the shop in the morning to get milk, I’d buy a super-sized Dairy Milk bar and six bags of Wotsits. I’d eat the chocolate on the way home then munch the crisps throughout the day.”

Mysteriously, she put on weight.

Every few months, Jo — who is married to HGV driver Ros, 43 — expanded by another dress size.

Non-British readers may wonder what all the fuss is about. A Wotsit is a decent enough snack. But what it lacks in nutrients it more than compensates for in its name. Saying ‘Wotsits’ is enjoyable. It’s pretty much the entire point of the Sun’s Food Beat: find a Wotsit story.


Posted: 7th, January 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Ready sliced chocolate for your sandwiches exists

You can buy cheese and meat shaped into thin, square slices to slap between two pieces of bread. Now you can buy sliced chocolate for your sarnie. Japanese company Bourbon is selling packets of five two-millimetre thick slices of  “nama chocolate”. Time to up your game, Nutella.



sliced chocolate sandwich

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 8th, December 2015 | In: The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Rare meat can kill

“RARE MEAT COULD KILL.” So declares the Sun via its front page. How rare? This rare?


fish meat kills


The Sun says “deadly superbugs” might be alive in your meaty dinner. These bugs are “drug-resistant superbugs”, maybe. But worry ye not. They can be killed by… cooking!

The Sun helpfully explains what cooking is to its slack-jawed readers. Tips include:

  • Use a pan
  • Use a hot grill
  • Cook

But mostly vitally: ensure animal is dead. Those things can really kick.


Posted: 8th, December 2015 | In: Reviews | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Watford restaurant served horse to diners who ordered zebra

Meat is RED RUM

Meat is RED RUM

If you ordered zebra and received horse, would you notice? Is the marbling different – the zebra being the more stripy meat? Watford’s Steakhouse eatery has been fined £4,000 after steaks it served as “zebra” and “wildebeest” turned out to be horse and venison.


The Standard says food inspectors “noticed a ticket in relation to their order which read; ‘1 venison, chips and salad; 1 horse, chips and salad” with no reference to either zebra or wildebeest, St Albans Magistrates’ Court heard.”

No horse meat featured on the menu. But 22kg of horse meat was in the restaurant’s freezer.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 20th, September 2015 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0

Tortilla terrorist: Dorito’s Roulette chili ‘nearly kills teen’

dorito hot roulette death schoolThe Sun has a story hot of the presses: a schoolgirl has had a near-death experience with a crisp.

It is the story of “Tortilla Terror”.

Ashtmatic 14-year-old Beth Laybourn was at school in Scarborough, North Yorkshire, when she ate the hot one in a bag of Dorito’s Roulette.

She says:

I started retching so I ran to the toilet and was sick. I had four mugs of milk and my throat still wouldn’t stop burning. I couldn’t breathe properly and I really thought I was going to die.”


“I love hot food, I love lamb bhunas — but this was the hottest thing I have ever had.”



DAily Mail killer crisps

Daily Mail introduces a new flavour


Beth’s mum then delivers a kick to the health lobby who think all crisps should come with a heavy tax:

“I never thought it could be so dangerous to eat a crisp. I won’t ever let them do it again. This could happen to anyone’s child.”

No longer do kids have to worry about the fat content killing them years own the line – with these new crisps, apparently you could die at any moment, although no-one has.

But can a hot chili kill?

Paul Bosland, professor of horticulture at New Mexico State University and director of the Chile Pepper Institute, was responsible for finding the world’s hottest chili pepper, the Bhut Jolokia.

Bosland says that chili peppers (or as some call them, chile peppers) can indeed cause death — but most  people’s bodies would falter long before they reached that point. “Theoretically, one could eat enough really hot chiles to kill you,” he says. “A research study in 1980 calculated that three pounds of extreme chilies in powder form — of something like the Bhut Jolokia — eaten all at once could kill a 150-pound person.”

That’s a lot of crisps…



Posted: 16th, July 2015 | In: Reviews | Comment | Comments RSS feed:RSS 2.0