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Posts Tagged ‘Fool’

CCTV footage of fools in train stations released

BEING drunk on a train is the single most soul-destroying experience a human can suffer. Sat on a wobbling, hot carriage with a headache, reeking of ale and needing the toilet every 10 minutes. If you’re going to be drunk on a train, at least have the clout to have been on a good night out beforehand, rather than just getting trolleyed on a choo-choo.

That said, if you do end up tottering through a train station when you’ve had a few, you might end up on a video put out by a train company.

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Posted: 12th, December 2012 | In: Reviews | Comment

Louis Walsh Called Simon Cowell A ‘Fool’: It’s Like Chosing Between Illnesses

TAKING sides is never easy. However, as humans, we’re preprogrammed to do exactly that. Whether it’s football teams or pooh-sticks floating down a river, we need to back someone because without competitiveness in our lives, we’re nothing.

However, what do we do when both sides are equally odious? Step forward, the catfight that is Louis Walsh and Simon Cowell. On one hand, we have a coal eyed, man boobular, high-waist banded snark; the other, we have a camp lunatic who has never once introduced his brain to his mouth (like a little Lenny Henry, you might say).

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Posted: 15th, August 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment (1)

Jim Devine Poll: Pig, Hamza, Fool, Innocent Or Fighter – You Choose

JIM Devine MP, David Chaytor MP, Elliott Morley MP and Conservative peer Lord Hanningfield who have all been charged with offences of false accounting arising from their expenses claims by the CPS. This is the start. The big question is which picture to laed with for Mr Divine.

Can you help us pick?

As for the case:

It is alleged that Morley dishonestly claimed mortgage expenses of £14,428 and £16,000, respectively.

Mr Chaytor, MP for Bury North, is alleged to have claimed dishonestly £1,950 for IT services by using false invoices and renting a property that, er, he owned.

He is accused of then renting a property in Bury, Lancashire, from his dear old mum.

Mr Divine, MP for Livingston, did, allegedly, between July 2008 and April 2009, uses bogus invoices to dishonestly claim £3,240 and worked the same trick in the matter of £5,505 of stationery.

Lord Hanningfield denies six cases of false accounting. The allegation – and enjoy this – sis that the shadow transport minister submitted claims for overnight expenses for staying in London when he in did in fact drive home or stay elsewhere. That’s transport for you – shadowy, allegedly. Says he:

“I am extremely disappointed by today’s announcement that I am to be charged. All the claims I have ever made were made in good faith. I have co-operated fully with the police throughout their inquiries. I totally refute the charges and will vigorously defend myself against them. I have never claimed more in expenses than I have spent in the course of my duties. To avoid any embarrassment or distraction for my party, I am standing down from my frontbench duties in the House of Lords with immediate effect.”

Mr Morley, Mr Chaytor, Mr Devine and Lord Hanningfield all say there are innocent.

In other news, all other MPs give the following statemen: “There for the grace of god – Phew!”

Posted: 5th, February 2010 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)