Posts Tagged ‘I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here.’
I’m A Celebrity: Mallett Snookered By McLean
TIMMY Mallett has been “HAMMERED” by his wife (Sun) and then “Bashed” (Star) by Nicola and Carly.
First up to have a go at Mallett is Mrs Lynda Mallet, who says of her man in the day-glo shorts, “He’s an annoying git.”
And it’s hard not to like him for it as Timmy laughs long and too loud at Robert Kilroy-Silk, a man who if he was half as fascinating to others as he is to himself would be stood in a glass box at the British Museum.
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Posted: 25th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (6)
Sheeny On Joe Swash, Jade Goody Would Be Proud
THE Croydonian notices that I’m Celebrity’s Joe Swash might be Jade Goody’s alter ego:
One of the contestants – Joe Swash – moaning about something or other said this,’It’s a bit sheeny, isn’t it?’. Or words to that effect, but he definitely used ‘sheeny’,as I reacted at the time. It is not the best known of unfortunate words, but this is what it means, definition taken from here:
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Posted: 24th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Nicola McLean’s Optics Illusion To Timmy Mallett’s Little Kilroy-Silk
IN the I’m A Celebrity Jungle “our Nicola” McLean “has still got her boobs out”.
Only she hasn’t. Nicola’s boobs remain restrained in her top waiting for the moment when despair takes root in the celebrity camp and she can uncork out her nipples and dispense a hearty broth (left) and nip of gin (right) to one and all.
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Posted: 21st, November 2008 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Reserves Turn Out For I’m A Celebrity
ONLY a very few knew the names of all the celebrities on ITV last night.
You can blame the lack of close up of the Wags, and the fact that Ant ‘n’ Dec were wearing the same kit as the indigenous tribe, but I’m A Celebrity was a game of two halves and little drama.
Good then that the Star has edited highlights of what viewers might have missed as ITV trained its cameras on Berlin.
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Posted: 20th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Dani Behr Bouncing Joey Update: The Kangaroo Kid
AN UPDATE to our earlier news that I’m A Celebrity agonist Dani Behr is expecting a bouncing baby Joey.
Says the Express: “KANGAROOS JUST A SHORT HOP FROM BEING HUMAN.”
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Posted: 19th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment
I’m A Celebrity Star Impregnated By Dinner
CAN you get pregnant by eating a crocodile’s penis? What about a kangaroo’s teste?
I’m A Celebrity junglist Dani Behr could be pregnant, reports the Star. She’s asked for a pregnancy kit to check.
Dani says she’s feeling a bit sick. It can’t be the termite bap she had for Tiffin, so it must be a child.
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Posted: 19th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comments (4)
Testes Times In The Celebrity Jungle
THE Daily Star reports that Nicola McLean is “not afraid to get her lips round a croc’s willy”.
How the paper knows this remains a story untold.
Last night we saw the pneumatic model eating kangaroo testes on I’m A Celebrity, so her sucking on a crocodile’s penis is not beyond the realms of possibility – unless of course, the penis is attached to the rest of the reptile and in a state of arousal.
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Posted: 18th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comments (10)
Nicola McClean On Her Budding Jordans
DAY one in the jungle and Nicola McLean is in a bikini.
Take care Nicola, say celebrity watchers, lest she get bitten and the puncture wounds cause her to leave the camp faster than a pricked balloon.
(Note: For similar reasons, gastric band enthusiast Fern Britton should avoid playing “human catapult” and hanging around with Boy Scouts).
While Mail readers get to see “desperate” Nicola crying for attention, Star readers get to see Nicole sans bra.
Nicola is planning to undergo a third boob job, readers learn, one that should make her “massive”.
Massive is a big word in Nicola life, it is something of an ambition.
Posted: 17th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
I’m A Celebrity: Nicola McLean Loves The Bush
NICOLA McLean is swinging into the I’m A Celebrity jungle on her burning bra straps.
Says Nicola: “I wouldn’t rule out a lesbian liaison… I like to look at girls, especially good looking girls.”
“I’LL SWING BOTH WAYS IN JUNGLE,” says the Sun’s front-page teaser.
The Star’s front-page “exclusive” echoes those words.
Nicola fancies a bushtucker trial with one of the ladies. Not since the heady days of Valerie Singleton, allegedly, has the Blue Peter garden known the like.
Posted: 14th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Little Weed Wanted For I’m A Celebrity Jungle
RIGHT now the Blue Peter Garden is being made ready for the first arrivals in the I’m A Celebrity Jungle.
Celebrity gnomes Ant (left) and Dec (right) are stood among the lawn of elephant grass through which eyeless pink snakes slither.
But there is trouble in paradise.
The Star brings news that one of the celebrity ornaments has decided to quit the show before it has even begun.
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Robert Kilroy Silk Spotted In I’m A Celebrity Jungle
REPORTS are that Robert Kilroy-Silk is to join Ant (right) and Dec (left) in the Blue Peter garden for this year’s I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here.
It’s very possible that Kilroy has been living in a garden or The Outback for some years. The once ubiquitous perma-tanned presence of mid-morning telly has been missing for some time.
When he formed Veritas political party in Hinckley Golf Club in Leicestershire,an alternative to UKIP, itself an alternative to the BNP/ Conservatives, he would bring about a revolution.
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Posted: 3rd, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment
