Posts Tagged ‘Jennifer Aniston’
Kristen Stewart And Robert Pattinson Sex Video
IN this week’s OK!, Twilight actress Kristen Stewart says she and co-star Robert Pattinson are not in love, a revelation that the magazine supports by way of picture of the pair moving in for a kiss. No sex video, just a kiss. Still, more than enough room for controversy in OK!.
The 5th Rule of Tabloid is that all actors in a hit film shall be linked by shared bodily juices in print unless they are a) unattractive; b) over 50; c) already dating Jennifer Aniston.
For more news on how Pattison and Stewart aren’t dating read OK!, and learn:
“ROBERT AND KRISTEN COME OUT – COUPLE SET TO ANOUNCE THEY’RE A COUPLE”
And this gem:
“They’ve decided to be more open.”
See interview with Kristen Stewart.
“Rob’s dedication to winning Kristen’s heart says something. He’s falling for her fast and seems to be head over heels.”
Such are the facts…
Posted: 26th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Gerard Butler Marries Jennifer Aniston In OK!
OK! Wednesday: Jordan comes clean, Steven Gerrard’s privacy, Patsy Kensit’s latest husband, Cheryl’s Cole weight secrets and Gerard Butler marries Jennifer Aniston…
Jordan Is No Longer Off Men
One week on from telling OK! readers that she is “off men”, Jordan tells OK! readers:
“I’m dating Alex but I’m no cheat.”
As ever this is billed as a “WORLD EXCLUSIVE”, and it will be news to those OK! readers who haven’t read the tabloids the past week or more in which Katie Price has been spotted with her new lover.
In Katie’s “DEAR JORDAN” agony aunt page, the aid to masturbation says:
“Everyone I get photographed with at the moment I’m supposedly sleeping with! But I can confirm I’m seeing Alex Reid and no one else.”
So she wasn’t lying when she said she was “off men”. She is “off men”, but “on man”.
Gerard Butler – “The HUNKY ACTOR OPENS UP ABOUT GOOD DATES, BAD DATES AND HIS FAVOURITE BIT OF WOMAN”
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Posted: 5th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Jennifer Aniston Is Pregant, Mel Gibson’s Hair Plugs And Michael Jackson’s Drugs Runner
NATIONAL Enquirer Tuesday: Angelina Jolie “explodes”, Jennifer Aniston is pregnant, Mel Gibson’s “hair plugs” and Michael Jackson’s drugs runner…
ANGELINA Jolie “EXPLODES”.
And the National Enquirer asks readers:
“Is Jennifer [Aniston] having your baby?”
This question might be pertinent. Over the past five years, Aniston’s womb has been the subject of much speculation in the Enquirer, it being possibly impregnated by a host of actors whose names are too long to list here.
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Posted: 4th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Michael Jackson Died Three Times And Jennifer Aniston Is Pregnant
THIS Week In The National Enquirer: Michael Jackson died three times, Jennifer Aniston is pregnant, Britney Spears kidnap fears and Jessica Simpson deflates…
Jennifer Ansiton tells Brad Pitt she’s pregnant
“JEN’S BABY NEWS STUNS BRAD! – Jen tells Brad I think I’m pregnant”
Has Gerard Butler, Jen’s new co-star, left her with child? Well, possibly. A source says Jennifer told Brad that she was late on her monthly cycle and that might mean that she was pregnant, or not. Either way it’s huge news.
And it’s getting huger. Having told the world that Jen is embroiled in a “steamy affair” with the aforesaid Butler, readers are asked to wonder who might be the father of the baby that Jennifer Aniston might be having, or not…
Jessica Simpson Jilted Again!
It’s ambulatory inflatable doll Jessica Simpson, who has been dumped by Dallas Cowboy’s quarterback Tony Romo.
“Tony Romo was looking for just the right moment to finally get Jessica Simpson out of his life – and he found it at an international House of Pancakes in the middle of Texas!”
He waited for her to go to the syrup trough and hid behind a tall stack..?
The story goes that Romo pulled over and told Simpson to get out his car. She did. He drove off. She bounced around waiting for help…
Question of the week: Is Kevin Federline’s girlfriend pregnant?
The Enquirer says Vitoria Prince “felt sick while having lunch with Kevin”.
Anyone else feel sick when the see K-Ferret? Best get a pregnancy kit, or a paper bag?
Britney Spears Kidnap Horror!
“Singer terrified her kids will be KIDNAPPED OR KILLED”.
Kids views on matter not known.
“Michael Jackson died 3 times in 18 months – Before final overdose!”
The Enquirer says Jackson’s heart stopped beating a hears from a source:
“You have to wonder if it was all a game for Michael. Did he get some bizarre enjoyment when he flatlined or ‘died’? Maybe in his mind he thought things were beautiful on the other side…
“Once after doctors finally managed to wake him up, Michael said he’ had died and gone to heaven and it felt good.”
Suicide?
Now read on…
Image: 14
Posted: 28th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Michael Jackson’s Missing Nose ‘Mentors’ Jennifer Aniston
MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Michael Jackson’s nose is missing, and Jennifer Aniston remembers….
Which nose? Fox News knows which nose:
Michael Jackson wore a prosthetic nose, according a report — and it was missing from his surgically mangled face as he lay in an LA morgue.
Left behind was a small, dark hole surrounded by bits of cartilage, Rolling Stone magazine said, citing witnesses who saw the King of Pop’s body on the autopsy table.
Which is exactly as the man lauded in the media as the King of Pop would like to be remembered.
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Posted: 24th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Angelina Jolie’s OK! Magazine Interview
ANGELINA Jolie is a “supermum”. She was “public enemy number one”, when she first hooked up with Brad Pitt, who one married to “girl-next-door” Jennifer Aniston. Brad is best known the Most Fanciable Man in Film. Or superdad. Or one half of Brangelina.
For someone who speaks so often to celebrity magazines, Jennifer Aniston has so little new to tell us.
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Posted: 25th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Jennifer Aniston Plans The Divorce Party
JENNIFER Aniston is at the Women in Film Awards in Culver City, Calif., where host Chelsea Handler is presenting the actress with the Crystal Award for Excellence in Film. Yeah, really.
Here’s Jennifer Aniston:
“I have a strange parallel with movies I was doing and my life off screen. First, it was The Good Girl…which evolved into Rumor Has It, followed by Derailed. Then there was The Breakup. Followed by the lighter side, Friends With Money. If anyone has a movie called Everlasting Love With an Adult Stable Man, that would be great! I’m at table six, and my agents are at table 12.“
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Posted: 13th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Angelina Jolie Catches Brad Pitt Texting ‘Golden’ Aniston
HAVING been told yesterday in HELLO! that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are so in love and that Jennifer Aniston has not made any contact whatsoever with Pitt, the Enquirer trills:
“ANGE WALKS IN ON JEN & BRAD”
It is…
“The EXPLOSIVE confrontation.”
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Posted: 27th, May 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (10)
Jennifer Aniston And Brad Pitt Get A Hotel Room
JENNIFER Aniston and Brad Pitt are “back together”.
There’s a “secret hotel reunion”. There are “tearful daily calls”. He’s “wearing her necklace”.
Grazia magazine’s cover trails a welter of facts.
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Posted: 12th, May 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
Jennifer Aniston Adopts Nicholas John
CRUEL to make National Enquirer readers wait an entire seven days for their next instalment of Jennifer Aniston’s life, but the wait is worth is it as it the magazine’s proud and delightful duty to announce that Ms Jennifer Aniston of the Jolie-Pitt Anistons is “A MOM AT LAST!”
News is that Jen is “adopting a baby boy!”
And “You won’t believe his name?”
Is is:
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Posted: 6th, May 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Jennifer Aniston Brings Beckham To Her Senses
“SKINNY is over!” announces heat magazine. And to prove how over skinny is, Jennifer Aniston has “put on half a stone”, “Posh bulks up at gym!” and Hello! magazine comes equipped with a bar of KitKat senses.
Unwrap your finger of chocolate, and marvel at how Jennifer Aniston has gained half a stone since she split from John Mayer.
Jens looks a “far cry from the shots we’re used to seeing of her on the beech with her trademark toned tummy and tony waist.”
A “far cry” – or a good cry?
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Posted: 5th, May 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
John Mayer Dumps Jennifer Aniston To Write The Great American Tweet
JENNIFER Aniston, the luckiest actress in Hollywood, is said to have split from lover John Mayer because he was spending too much time on Twitter and not enough time with her.
A Twitter post is at most 140 characters. Either Mayer is not all that fast a reader, or else he was working on the perfect Tweet, what we may call The Great American Tweet.
A source tells Star magazine about Aniston, the world’s first Twitter Widow.
“John suddenly stopped calling her or returning her emails and when she would finally catch up with him, he’d say: ‘I’ve been so busy with work. I’m sorry I haven’t had time to call you back’.”
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Posted: 24th, March 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Jennifer Aniston And Angelina Jolie To Meet On Feb 21
JENNIFER Aniston and Angelina Jolie, after “fighting words, near encounters and private pain”, finally see each other at the Feb. 21 Night Before the Oscars party in Beverly Hills.
So says OK! magazine, which thinks the date is set for the most eagerly expected meeting since Peter Doherty introduced a needle to his testicular vein.
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Posted: 18th, February 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (4)
Jennifer Aniston Lives In The Mad Men Past
JENNIFER Aniston would love to be in Mad Men, the TV show set in the 1060s. she is big fan . Waaaaay big. Says Jennifer Aniston:
“I like Mad Men. I would love to be in that. It is such a good show, it’s great. I love the 50’s era. I would love it if they offered me a role.”
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Posted: 11th, January 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Obama Balls: Jennifer Aniston’s Perspective
JENNIFER Aniston tells the globally distributed newspapers USA Today that she, er, wants to be left alone. It’s what Obama would want:
Seriously, it’s enough. It’s like we’re appealing to the lowest … And this is at a time when we should be so inspired and excited with what’s happening with the president. It’s a time to be positive and join together. We’re just trying to entertain you, man. Don’t shoot the messenger –
– Jennifer Aniston, USA Today
Posted: 8th, December 2008 | In: Politicians | Comment
Jennifer Aniston’s Fish Entree
JENNIFER Aniston is an actress:
After starting with a round of cocktails, John and Jen shared a salad, followed by a fish entree. She was even seen feeding him a vegetable off her fork.
She looks like a blow dried Lily Allen…
Posted: 22nd, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Looking For Jennifer Aniston At Jennifer Hudson’s Crime Scene
IN TODAY’S episode of “Where’s Jennifer Aniston?” the National Enquirer shines a searchlight on life in the Hollywood Hills.
“Jennifer Hudson MURDER TRAGEDY!” screams the NE.
We read on and among the gore and the grimness, we find no hint of our Jennifer. There are “crime scene photos”, and readers see: a tape, a car, a door handle with a combination lock built in and pictures of the gone.
But there’s no Jen. All the faces are black, and Jen is blonde. She’d stand out. She’s not there.
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Posted: 4th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Jennifer Aniston Races Angelina Jolie To The Baby Stack
JENNIFER Aniston is Princess Diana to the Enquirer’s Daily Express. Every issue comes with a Jen ishoo.
Jen’s issue du joy is that Angelina Jolie is a “LIAR”.
Ange is Jen’s “love rival”, albeit a rivalry like that which exists between Arsenal (Angelina ) and Spurs (Jen) where one party gets all the beauty, spoils and glory the other gets to live in the halcyon days of past glories and shop of new faces.
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Posted: 28th, October 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Britney Spears In Paint Job Horror Ding
BREAKING Britney Spears news in the NOTW. Britney is shopping in a shop. Now read on…
The Womanizer star’s driver got caught up in a bumper bashing episode while the singer was shopping in West Hollywood. You can see the incident on our weekly round-up of the hottest news from Hollywood.
Other news:
Angelina Jolie housekeeper road tests new apron
Jennifer Aniston still not pregnant
Pickled Amy Winehouse sold by the jar
Lily Allen’s Tobacconist lights match…
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Posted: 12th, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment (1)
Angelina Jolie’s Creative Smut
Forbes says luxuries are out in teh credit crunch. No magazines. You can read the mags on Anorak for free. Here’s whats in this week’s showbiz mags:
Angelina prepares for her dream wedding! Shiloh to be the flower girl!
Angelina storms out – Brad’s family drives them apart!
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Posted: 9th, October 2008 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
Celebrity News Of The Day: Jennifer Aniston Is Rushing
THERE’S a picture of Hollywood actress Jennider Aniston in the Daily Mirror. But why?
“Jennifer Aniston seems to be in a bit of a rush – perhaps she’s heading for a date with a new Friend?”
Yeah, perhaps…
Posted: 18th, September 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comments (3)
