Posts Tagged ‘John Terry’
Premier League Unveils New Ashley Cole And John Terry Fashion Range
ANORAK TV brings you the exclusive news that Ashley Cole and John Terry have inspired a new range of unofficial Team England World Cup wear. Tired to nylon shorts and too-tight replica tops and tricky socks, the fan can now move about South Africa suited and booted in the knowledg that they are the Englishman abroad.
Ready… Steady… And they’re off!
Cheryl Cole And Ashley’s Marriage
Vanessa Perroncel (John Terry’s Alleged Lover)
Posted: 25th, February 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment
Tiger Woods Releases Made-For-TV Film
JOHN Terry, that loyal family man who bleeds for the cause might care to take a look at Tiger Woods, who is all set to emerge from the bunker to appear in press confrnce that will look more like a soft-focus made-for-TV film. From the Forums, AGW writes:
Grab a big bucket if you were close to vomiting watching Chelsea and former England skipper John Terry’s pathetic reinvention attempt to portray a happy marriage and beautiful if stained relationship with, allegedly, duped wife Toni….
Ashley Cole And The Secretary: The Sun Goes For Chelsea Star And Plays Footsie With John Terry
Tiger Woods is going to show us all how public reconstruction is done with the right kind or mega-sport swing.
John Terry allegedly paid-off alleged former squeeze and mother of his ex-best mate’s son Vanessa Perroncel.
Nothing so crass for the Tiger.
Terry was aided and abetted by News Corporation owners of the scandal-breaking News of The World which ran then spiked the affair story to allow sister paper The Sun to run the John and Toni Terry reaffirm their love fairy-story.
Tiger, on the other hand will apologise for his infidelities in a “news conference” tomorrow (Friday, Feb. 19).
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Posted: 18th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comments (2)
Lottery Winners Nigel Page And Justine Laycock Linked To John Terry
NIGEL Page and Justine Laycock are celebrating their £56million Lottery win on the all the papers. Can they be linked by media to the big John Terry story?
The Star says the couple could buy a pair of space shuttles for £47million.
The Mail and Express say the couple celebrated with bacon sarnies. The Mail beign the trawl for dirt and ex-lovers by revealing that they’ve both been married before. We meet Mrs Laycock’s two children, Georgia and Jacob, and Mr Page’s daughter Ella, who they’ve “joked” about getting a Shetland pony for.
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Posted: 16th, February 2010 | In: Money | Comments (3)
Why John Terry Escapes And The Sun Guns For Ashley Cole
WHILE News Cops cheers for John Terry, spiking the story of his alleged sex with Vanessa Perroncel and other women, replacing that with tales of a man of “candour” and love, the Sun guns for Ashley Cole, alleged sex texter?
Cole enjoys a tabloid profile between paedophile and MP. He has not helped himself in the past, (* “EXCLUSIVE WHAT COLE’S PEOPLE TOLD BLONDE HE BEDDED – If you’re pregnant, we’ll fix it”) but why should the Sun lead with a picture of Ashely on a mobile phone – and just as Terry zooms off to Dubai? While, we wonder, we remind you of this:
* The multi-millionaire Chelsea ace – nicknamed Cashley and on £82,000 a week – threatened to sue The Sun for aggravated damages if we published pictures showing him beside a beautiful blonde.
And it was the Sun that introduced Aimee Walton, she of the vomit-‘n’-tell alleged sex with Cole.
John Terry: Wayne Bridge’s Lover Vanessa Perroncel In Pictures (NSFW)
Alicia Douvall (NSFW)
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Posted: 15th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
John Terry, Ashley Cole And Vernon Kay United For St Valentine’s Day Massacre
VALENTINE’S Day is “cancelled” because of John Terry, Ashley Cole and Vernon Kay. They are the “Stupid Rats” who are preventing you from laying a scentless rose on your lover’s pillow and dining out on an over-priced meal with funeral arrangements for pudding.
The New of The World has the news that comes too late for a million men racing home with garage forecourt flowers entwined about a pair of musical knickers. In order, the St Valentine’s Day Massacres’ leading players:
Passion Killer: Vernon Kay
Poison Arrow: Rhian Sugden
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Posted: 14th, February 2010 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment
John Terry Flies To Dubai: Police Ready To Arrest Alleged ‘Adulterer’
CHELSEA captain John Terry is on his way to Dubai, and away from Vanessa Perroncel. He is racing to meet Toni Terry – well, just as soon as he’s played games against Arsenal, Hull and Everton. But he can miss Cardiff city. Love is bigger than Cardiff City.
So Dubai it is. And in Dubai, they arrrest you for adulTerry, sorry, adultery. Not that John Terry has committed adultery. We have heard that as a fact here. Look, Mr Dubai policeman, JT is a top bloke.
British Couple Jailed For Adultery In Dubai
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Posted: 10th, February 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment
The Hug E Gram: John Terry Need Never Leave Home Again
AS John Terry dashes out to Dubai to be with his loving wife Toni – just as soon as the game is over, and the next game, and the next – you may be wondering what you can do to show your love this Valentine’s Day. Garage forecourt flowers? A new tea towel? A divorce? Well, those and more. With a Hug E Gram who can tell your partner what you really think of them. Available in Chelsea Blue and “clingy”…
Posted: 10th, February 2010 | In: The Consumer | Comment
Angelina Jolie Comforts John Terry: Pictures
ANGELINA Jolie breaks away from Brad Pitt (pictures) to tell the world:
“It is incredibly horrible to see a catastrophe of this size hit a people who have been suffering from extreme poverty, violence and unrest for so many decades.”
We hear you, Ange. But Chelsea captain John Terry’s alleged affair with Vanessa Perroncel is not such a big deal to England fans – not when you look at Haiti and David Beckham’s new tattoo…
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Posted: 9th, February 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
John Terry Does Not Pull A Cockroach From His Ear: A Video
JOHN Terry knows it could be worse. You could have a live cockroach in your ear. No, not a slight on the venerable and charming Mr Max Clifford nor a slang terms for a novelty orifice sex move. This is a real cockroach. In a real ear. The doctor films his operation. The operation ends up on You Tube. The cockroach becomes a huge star and denies shagging John Terry:
Posted: 7th, February 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment
Vanessa Perroncel Backs Out On John Terry: Max Clifford’s Non Story In Pictures
JOHN Terry is sacked as England captain. And his alleged mistress Vanessa Perroncel stands at the offices of Mr Max Clifford in Mayfair, London, and tells us that she will not sell her story. Vanessa Perroncel responds after seeing that John Terry has been dropped. Vanessa Perrroncel hires Clifford and then doesn’t let him sell her story for £250,000. Who paid for Clifford’s service – or does her work pro bona (that’s a sexy pun, readers)? John Terry: Wayne Bridge’s Lover Vanessa Perroncel In Pictures (NSFW); Alicia Douvall (NSFW); Lauren Pope (NSFW)…
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Posted: 5th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
John Terry Meets Die Antwoord: Video
THIS is what the web is all about – introducing Die Antwoord, “Zef Side [Beat Boy] – the Afrikaans beat boy rappers.
Die Antwoord have a website. Thsi si what the ngland team will hear in their changing room as the South Africans get ready to kick the lather off of John Terry’s mob in the World Cup Final. And then take all the WAGs for a slap up feed on their remote hill-top farm.
Via Sophisticated Funk and BB
Posted: 2nd, February 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment
Hello!: John Terry Spots Vanessa Perroncel, Cheryl Cole’s For Haiti And Coleen Rooney Shocks
IN this Week’s Hello!, John Terry and Vanessa Perroncel revealed, Coleen Rooney on baby Kai and Cheryl Cole tells of “heartbreak”.
It’s the Premier League drool-fest in this week’s Hello!. The magazine no longer leads with shots of chinless Euro-trash at play but goes with Coleen Rooney telling us that “Kai is a really good baby”.
Adding:
“He’s not a crier at all.”
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John Terry And Vanessa Perroncel: JT Scores In Pictures
JOHN Terry and Vanessa Perroncel: The knives are out for Chelsea and England captain John Terry. Get this from the Daily Mail:
The England captain John Terry faces fans’ fury as affair with team mate’s girlfriend is revealed
READ: John Terry’s Dirty Play Gets A Red Card: Media Delights
Fans love JT. But the only thing they love more is TP – Toni Poole, JT’s wife. It is alleged that top family bloke Terry cheated on Tony with French knickers model Perroncel, who dated former Chelsea player Wayne Bridge (they share child), now playing his trade at Manchester City Inc.
Pictures: Vanessa Perroncel (John Terry’s Alleged Lover)
Fans are outraged. Especially those Chelsea fans who saw Terry score the winning goal as their side beat Burnley 2-1 and remain at the top of the Premier League. They must be furious.
John Terry: Wayne Bridge’s Lover Vanessa Perroncel In Pictures (NSFW)
Says Bridge:
“I have read the press reporting in the last two days. The reports deal with matters which are of a deeply personal and private nature. My primary concern is the welfare of my son. Therefore, I intend to make no comment whatsoever either now or in the future about these reports and ask that my privacy is respected.”
Isn’t that a comment?
Pictures: Vanessa Perroncel (John Terry’s Alleged Lover)
Says the Mail:
England captain John Terry was booed on the football terraces this afternoon after it was revealed he had cheated on his wife with a team-mate’s girlfriend.
Toni Terry. Toni Terry. We’ll support you ever more…
READ: John Terry’s Dirty Play Gets A Red Card: Media Delights
Pictures: Vanessa Perroncel (John Terry’s Alleged Lover)
Posted: 30th, January 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment (1)
John Terry’s Dirty Play Gets A Red Card: Media Delights
JOHN Terry is alleged to be the Chelsea and England captain who cheated on his wife, the fragrant Toni, with his former teammate Wayne Bridge’s girlfiend Vanessa Perroncel. AGW looks at the news:
I CARE less than two shakes of a WAG’s lascivious and undoubtedly libidinously sexily under-weared backside whether or not England’s football captain was actually shagging his best friend’s girl. I’ll leave that to the News of the World’s story tomorrow.
Pictures: Vanessa Perroncel (John Terry’s Alleged Lover)
The fact that the best friend’s girl was allegedly his wife’s best friend too was no surprise.
What does tee me off no end is England Captain John Terry used media super lawyers to seek a super-injunction banning even the mention that an injunction was in place….and then did not warn other newspapers of its existence. Dirty play and should have attracted an immediate red card.
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Jade Goody And Jack Tweed’s Coffee Morning
ON with the mission to make doe-faced, ex-lag, wannabe football agent, John Terry stand-in, sort of model, jobbing Mr Jade Goody emeritus Jack Tweed a bona fide celebrity.
This week Jack Tweed volunteers to launch the World’s Biggest Coffee Morning in aid of Macmillan Cancer Support.
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Posted: 15th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
An Invitation To Join Joe Cole As He Marries Carly Zucker
OK! invites its readers to a Joe Cole and Carly Zucker wedding “special”.
In “Joe Cole scores”, readers can see Cole (smart light grey FA Cup Final-type suit) stood behind Carly Zucker (plain white dress), herself stood behind John Terry, the England captain clad in a sunset yellow suit with what appears to be a bouquet of white roses growing from behind his right eat. In front of John Terry – facing him – is his wife, Toni Terry, dressed in the contents of King Midas’s bottom drawer, the stuff he reserved for when he wanted to dazzle.
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Posted: 24th, June 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Video: Frank Lampard and John Terry abused at West Ham
JT and Lampsy were singled out by West Ham fans during Chelsea’s visit to Upton Park last weekend. No surprise there: both Lampard and Terry hate West Ham, and the feeling is mutual.
Terry thinks Irons’ fans crossed the line (they slagged off his mum), but he’s man enough to take it. England’s captain said:
“I can take it, Lamps can take it. It’s a little bit more than that but I’m not going to give them a chance to say I’m whingeing… If they can give they can take it, and if I can take it I can give it. That’s the way it’s got to be.”
Relax, JT. The fans slagged off your mum, not you. Oh…
Watch videos of Terry and Lampard copping stick at Upton Park below:
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Posted: 28th, April 2009 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Umbro can’t plug new England shirt leak
AFTER many years of producing terrible kits for England, it appears Umbro may finally have got it right (the fact that Nike, who do tend to make decent kits, now owns Umbro may have something to do with it).
This is a leaked photo of the new England home kit, as sported by skipper John Terry and goalie David James. There seems to be some debate about whether or not the photo is genuine, but Anorak can confirm it is for real (don’t ask us our sources – we’d only have to kill you).
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Posted: 28th, March 2009 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (5)
John Terry’s Mum Nicks Pedigree Chum
UPDATE: John Terry’s mum arests:
“JT’s mum nicked Pedigree Chum” – Sun
JOHN TERRY’S old Mum, Sue, has been nicked and officially cautioned by police for shoplifting clothes and food from Marks & Spencer and Tesco, at a shopping centrey in Surrey.
Stay classy, footballer’s mum.
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Posted: 28th, March 2009 | In: Sports | Comments (4)
John Terry’s Transsexual Secret, Revealed!
ANORAK applauds Chelsea’s extremely heterosexual captain for having the balls to go public with his secret (until now) transsexual identity – Mr JT is perhaps the last baller we would expect this of.
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Posted: 5th, February 2009 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (11)
Reserves Turn Out For I’m A Celebrity
ONLY a very few knew the names of all the celebrities on ITV last night.
You can blame the lack of close up of the Wags, and the fact that Ant ‘n’ Dec were wearing the same kit as the indigenous tribe, but I’m A Celebrity was a game of two halves and little drama.
Good then that the Star has edited highlights of what viewers might have missed as ITV trained its cameras on Berlin.
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Posted: 20th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment
