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Posts Tagged ‘manchester city’

Barcelona president tells a funny joke about Arsenal and Manchester City

BARCELONA president Sandro Rosell puts his hand on his hip, a metal dish on his head and spouts about black pots:

“Manchester City want to remove our players and want to destabilise us. It also happens with Arsenal, who come knocking for youth football players and offer them a lot of money” 

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Posted: 18th, October 2012 | In: Sports | Comment


Spanish police behave like Spanish police as they beat up Manchester City fans (video)

WHEN Manchester City went on tour to Real Madrid, the local police managed to behave badly. David Dubas-Fisher filmed the argy-bargy. He called it:  The Ghost of Franco Returns to Haunt Manchester City

Hey. It’s not like Abu Dhabi, is it. Franco would have like it over there.

Langauge is NSFW.

 

Posted: 25th, September 2012 | In: Sports | Comment


Homesick in Preston Richard Wright ends up at Manchester City

HOW football works: former Arsenal and England goalkeeper Richard Wright has signed for Manchester City, reports the Daily Mail.

As Wright said in July on his desire to move from Preston North End – the club he signed for a few days previously:

“It might seem somewhat dramatic. But I have only been away from my home in East Anglia for a few days and I know already that I simply cannot live that far away from my family. I have children settled in school, so moving isn’t an option.”

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Posted: 31st, August 2012 | In: Sports | Comment


Mario Balotelli – the best of his Euro 2012 memes (but no Olympic Torch)

MANCHESTER City and Italy’s maverick striker Mario Balotelli put in a more than decent effort at the Euro 2012 Championships. That Italy lost to Spain will, naturally, have disappointed him. We who had heard that rumours that at the moment of victory, Mario would have removed the Catherine Wheel he keeps trapped to his person, lit it and run around the stadium handing out sparklers to under 12s are also saddened. If there is one thing we know about modern football it is that you can never have too many fireworks. The pity is that no-one had the foresight to let Balotelli have a turn with the Olympic Torch, adding a touch of pizzazz and excitement as he ran around his hotel suite with the fully lit burner. Still, he left us with one abiding image. When he scored against Germany, Balotelli ripped off his shirt. A meme was born:

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Posted: 2nd, July 2012 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment


When Wayne Rooney laughed at Manchester City’s penalty losers

ENGLAND are out of Euro 2012. Thoughts turn to the charmless and unfit England journeyman and Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney, who when the Ivory Coast lost the Africa Cup of Nations final on penalties to Zambia noticed that Manchester City’s Touré bothers were in the defeated team. In the spirit of the ‘football family’, Rooney tweeted:

@WayneRooney zzzzzzzzzzz pga golf is on. Funny that 2 toures was there all the way and lost. Haha

England fielded three Manchester City players in the England starting XI that went out to Italy. One Manchester Untied player, Ashley Young, missed a spotkick for England. One City player, Mario Balotelli, scored past City’s Joe Hart, who was mugged by Pirlo.

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Posted: 25th, June 2012 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


The Manchester City tattoo story – Rooney, Mancini and Kaka’s European Champions

ROBERTO Mancini is under pressure to get a Manchester City crest tattooed on his leg. Why? Because his other leg already bears a Sampdoria crest, which he acquired after his team won Serie A in 1991.

He is reported to have said: “I have another leg. If I win the Premier League with Manchester City, I might get one.”

Note the word ‘if’ in that sentence.

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Posted: 14th, May 2012 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment (1)


Premier League last day photos – Barton, Furlop and Manchester City madness

PREMIER League Last Day Photos – Joey Barton loses it for QPR; former Tottenham Hotspur goalkeeper Marlon Furlop wins third spot for Arsenal (in place of Spurs; although Man United are still North London’s top team) and Manchester City provide a fitting and joyous minute of madness…

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Federica Mancini, Wife of Manchester City's manager Roberto in the stands

 

Posted: 13th, May 2012 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment


Photos: Manchester City v Manchester United – how the 2012 Premier League was won and lost

IN Photos: Manchester City v Manchester United – how the 2012 Premier League was won and lost – with a goal from Vincent Kompany, views by Maradona and Rio Ferdinand’s tongue…







Posted: 30th, April 2012 | In: Reviews, Sports | Comment


The night Mario Balotelli made a drink of his urine

MORE on Mario Balotelli, the unmarried Manchester City striker who allegedly shagged Chloe Evans. Having said Balotelli was crap in bed (maybe it was you, Chloe?), the kiss ‘n’ teller is reported telling the Sun about the “crazy lifestyle of soccer badboy Mario Balotelli”.

The soccer badboy is a talented 21-year-old finding his feet working and living in a foreign country. Balotelli has embraced the prevailing culture by shagging tabloid-friendly English birds and allowing his bathroom to be the venue for a Bonfire Night do. The fire brigade was called and Balotelli’s friends (because it was them – really it was) would to well to read the full firework code, especially the bit about returning to a smouldering toilet roll. But, still, for the Italian Catholic import to be celebrating the death of the Papist Gunpowder Plot is admirable.

Balotelli did say that Manchester “is not to my tastes”. But no great hurt in that. Most Manchester United fans who only ever see the city’s wide open green spaces and ordered seating on the telly agree. And he can always commute from London or Abu Dhabi.

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Posted: 30th, April 2012 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment


Roberto Mancini’s five point mind games

THE Premier League title race according to Manchester City’s Roberto Mancini:

“I won one title with Inter Milan when we were five points behind, five games from the end – this is football so we will see. Everything can happen but clearly we need to start to win” – Mancini – April 11, Manchester City pre-match programme notes.

“It is finished. Five points is too much. United have got fantastic spirit. We don’t have this spirit” – Mancini, April 11 2012, after the match that saw United’s lead cut to five points.

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Posted: 12th, April 2012 | In: Sports | Comment


Manchester City fan John Millington explains his tears

JOHN Millington is the Manchester City fan filmed ‘teary-eyed’ in the stands after his team had lost to Swansea City.

Says John to the Manchester Evening News:

“I wasn’t crying, I was just frustrated and very tired.

“I put my head down and when I looked up there was a camera in my face and I knew what it would have looked like. I just thought ‘oh no’. I can’t really remember it, I’d finished work the night before at eight, not gone to bed until midnight and had to be up at 4am. I think it was a combination of the beer and being tired and it all just went bang… There was a tear in my eye but I wasn’t crying. And it’s still in our hands.”

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Posted: 13th, March 2012 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


Mario Balotelli goes mad in Manchester

MANCHESTER City’s Mario Balotelli was asked to remove his hood when on a trip to Manchester’s Trafford Centre. It takes a brave shopkeeper to tell big-spending Mario to comply or else. But Balotelli took it in good spirit. He said he’d rather leave than remove his hood and be recognised.

A Trafford Centre spokesperson said:

“At 21:02 GMT a customer was approached by security staff and advised that wearing a hooded top covering the head is against centre policy. The customer was Italian and native Italian-speaking staff were dispatched to converse with the customer.”

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Posted: 7th, March 2012 | In: Sports | Comment


Racism forces Manchester City’s Micah Richards to close twitter account

MANCHESTER City defender Micah Richards is no longer on twitter. Racists have driven him off the social network site.

The Daily Mail and Daily Mirror say the City and England player had enough of the racist abuse coming his way and shut his account.

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Posted: 11th, February 2012 | In: Sports | Comment


‘Whale tea, sea cake and FROSTIES!!! Roberto Mancini and Steven Gerrard row

YOU are about to hear Manchester City manager Roberto Mancini and Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard exchange views after the Carling Cup semi-final first leg at the Etihad…

As Mancini says, quixotically:

“Whale tea, sea cake and FROSTIES!!!”

Steven Gerrard is duly put in his place as Mancini finds a way to talk that foxes the anti-racists…

Posted: 13th, January 2012 | In: Sports | Comment


Skegness CID Turn Hunt For Twitter Twat Who Racially Abused Man City’s Micah Richards Into A PR Exercise

DID you racially abuse Manchester City and England players Micah Richards on Twittre? Did you twat an offensive email from somewhere in Lincolnshire?

Well, if you did, you’d best worry. Police are looking for you. And if they catch you they’ll… They’ll. Well, what? Spend a lot of time and money taking you to court to make an example of you?

Det Insp Andy Wardell, from Skegness CID, says:

“Whilst the investigation is still in its early stages, Lincolnshire Police will be conducting a robust enquiry and wish to make it clear from the outset that racist comments aimed at anybody, not just those in the media spotlight, will not be tolerated and those committing such offences can expect to be pursued and dealt with under the relevant legislation.”

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Posted: 1st, December 2011 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (6)


Manchester City’s Mario Balotelli Is Mental, Likeable And Talented: Who Else Is In His Zone?

THE Balotelli Zone is where Manchester City’s Mario Balotelli lives. He is as good at football as he is mental as he is likeable. Who else is in the zone? Eric Cantona? But did anyone outside Manchester United’s walls like him? Stan Bowles? Zinedine Zidane? Paul Gascoigne?

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Posted: 16th, November 2011 | In: Sports | Comment


Manchester City’s Mario Balotelli Burnt In Anti-Catholic Witch Hunt

THIS year’s Edenbridge Bonfire Society celebrity guy, a giant effigy of Manchester City striker Mario Balotelli. Last year, they burnt Wayne Rooney. This year’s voodoo ceremony features the likeable Balotelli, whose home was set alight by a firework set off in his bathroom. It might have been Ryan Giggs, the Welsh Wizard but this isn’t Pendle

Posted: 2nd, November 2011 | In: Sports | Comment


Tesco Offers Post-Thrashing Discount On Manchester United Cake: Man City’s Still Expensive

CHRIS Wright over at Pies spots that Tesco’s are offering a post-thrashing discount on Manchester United cakes. United’s doughnut-munching goalkeeper De Gea might be interested…

Posted: 26th, October 2011 | In: Sports | Comment


Manchester City Fan Teaches Budgie To Praise Team: Video

TO Manchester, where Cheeksey the budgies can say “‘Come on City” and “Roberto Mancini”.

Says his pal Jeremy Sutcliffe:

“He’s quite a character. I’m now going to teach him how to say Sergio Aguero.”

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Posted: 25th, October 2011 | In: Sports | Comment


Noel Gallagher ‘On Knees’ For Manchester Derby

MANCHESTER derbies have definitely favoured the red half of the city (please make your own jokes about the red half of Manchester being in Essex) over the years, with Manchester City’s last big derby coming in the late ’80s with a 5-1 pasting of the Red Devils at Maine Road.

But of course, this weekend, City trounced United 6-1 at Old Trafford. The last time Man United lost to a five goal margin, Jesus Christ our Lord was on the books for Galilee Argyle.

And of course, one of Manchester City’s most famous fans, Noel Gallagher, was thrilled at the win. Everyone who isn’t a Man Utd fan was in fairness. With a fresh number one album under his belt, Noel was understandably chuffed to bits.

But what helped the victory? Noel told the BBC:

“The fact that Alex Ferguson rested Howard Webb”

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Posted: 24th, October 2011 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Manchester City’s Mario Balotelli’s Home Catches Fire: The Fireberk Is A Flare Player

MARIO Balotelli, the Manchester City striker, has, reportedly, “torched”: his £1.3m Macclesfield home after fireworks were let off in his bathroom. He is the Star’s FIREBERK”.

Dominik Lemanski reports:

BARMY Manchester City star Mario Balotelli’s £1.3million mansion was ravaged by a blaze yesterday after fireworks were set off in the bathroom.

According to reports the madcap Italian and a group of friends were playing with powerful pyrotechnics inside his rented £7,500-a-month country pad. The fire, which destroyed the first floor of the Cheshire mansion, began when a towel was set alight by an industrial firework let off from a bathroom window.

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Posted: 23rd, October 2011 | In: Sports | Comment


Mario Balotelli’s Man City Christmas Party With Snow Coated Tiger Dwarves

THE invitation to Manchester City Christmas party is in the post. It promises to be one helluva do. It’s being organised by Mario Balotelli.

The Daily Star reports:

Mario isn’t one for drinking and falling out of clubs, he just thinks he can take a party to the next level. But some of the lads aren’t so sure. They are half-expecting imported snow with tigers and dwarves.”

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Posted: 17th, October 2011 | In: Sports | Comment


Shagging Stefan Effenberg Adds Irony To Manchester City’s Carlos Tevez Debate

GERMAN legend Stefan Effenberg wades into the debate over whether or not Manchester City’s Carlos Tevez refused to play against Bayern Munich:

“That player would never play in the same club as me again – that goes without saying. There is a clear order from the coach and he disregards it. That is poor behaviour and the club has got to come down hard on it…You just don’t do something like that. It is disrespectful to your team-mates and is not just in spite of the coach, but in spite of the whole team.”

Might this be the same Effenberg who in the late 1990s was shagging Claudia Strunz, wife of his Bayern Munich team-mate Thomas Strunz? (See photo of the now married couple used to publicise the player’s book.)

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Posted: 28th, September 2011 | In: Sports | Comment


Carlos Tevez Is Heading To Spurs: Manchester City Begin Desperate Search For New Rich Brat

CARLOS Tevez, Manchester City’s £200,000-a-week striker, explains why he didn’t play against Bayern Munich as a substitute:

“This is not the right time to go into specific details as to why this did not happen but I wish to state I never refused to play. There was some confusion on the bench and I believe my position was misunderstood.”

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Posted: 28th, September 2011 | In: Sports | Comment