Mario Balotelli | Anorak

Posts Tagged ‘Mario Balotelli’

What rich fools will rid Liverpool of Mario Balotelli?

balotelli saleLiverpool are panicked by the sight of Mario Balotelli returning from his season-long loan at AC Milan.

Balotelli joined Liverpool for £16million on a three-year, £125,000-a-week deal from AC Milan in August 2014. In his time at Liverpool, the Italian striker has scored four goals.

Balotelli’s contract offers him the option of a fourth year when this deal runs out.

Understandably, current Liverpool manager Jurgen Klopp wants shot of the overpaid Italian signed by his predecessor, Brendan Rodgers, now the Celtic boss, who opined in 2014: “I think to get someone of that quality in this market is a very good deal for us.”

Balotelli cost Manchester City £22.5m when he signed from Internazionale in 2010. He was sold to Milan for £19m and to Liverpool for £16m. It was a risky singing, which Rodgers acknowledged.

But Rodgers and the Liverpool transfer committee should have paid more heed to José Mourinho, his old boss who coached Balotelli at Inter.

“We went to play Rubin Kazan in the Champions League. All my other strikers were injured. No Diego Milito, no Samuel Eto’o,” recalled Mourinho. “I was really in trouble. Mario got a yellow card in the 42nd minute and when I got into the dressing room at half-time I spent 14 minutes of the 15 available speaking to Mario. I said to him: ‘Mario, I can’t change you, I have no strikers on the bench, don’t touch anybody and play only the ball. Mario, if someone provokes you, don’t react. If we lose the ball, no reaction. If the referee makes a mistake, no reaction…. The 46th minute: red card.”

Klopp has seen and heard enough.

“He’s not at the stage of his career where he should be battling with four or five players for one or two positions,” says Klopp. “So it’s clear we need a solution. There will be a club who would be happy to have the new Mario Balotelli.”

But will there be a club willing to cough up a big whack of cash and pay the likeable lunk half a million pounds a month?

As Mario Sconcerti put it in Corriere della Sera, Balotelli possesses  “the strange talent of making everyone happy when he arrives and even happier when he leaves”.

Posted: 14th, July 2016 | In: Back pages, Liverpool, Sports | Comment (1)

Liverpool balls: ‘troubled’ Mario Balotelli’s ADHT, abandonment issues and kryptonite seatbelt

Liverpool striker Mario Balotelli is the subejct of the Sun story: “Kop star’s secret”:

TROUBLED Liverpool striker Mario Balotelli has shown signs of suffering from attention deficit disorder since he was a youngster, SunSport can reveal.

Nice, eh. Balotelli, the man who holds down a good job and has no criminal record is “troubled”. And it;’s a “secret”, implying that he knows he’s “troubled” but doesn’t want you to know it, too.

The Italian’s mood swings and outrages have been a feature of his life on and off the field and have affected his career with Inter Milan, Manchester City, AC Milan and now Liverpool.

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Posted: 20th, December 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment

Liverpool Balls: Balotelli Is Only A Racist If You Think He Is

Liverpool Balls: Mario Balotelli is attracting attention for posting a message online that contained a racist trope. Balotelli says he will fight any FA ban.

Oliver Kay writes:

Football has endured a succession of depressing race-related controversies over the past few years — John Terry, Luis Suárez and, more recently, Malky Mackay and Dave Whelan — but Balotelli’s latest indiscretion would appear to belong in a different category.

Whatever his flaws, Balotelli, the poster boy for multicultural 21stcentury Italy, born to Ghanaian immigrants in Sicily, brought up by a Jewish family in Lombardy, subjected to appalling racist abuse in his homeland, did not seem an obvious candidate for the sport’s latest race storm.

The problem with Balotelli, according to many who have worked with him, is that he gets bored very easily and, to be polite about this, lacks qualities of discernment. That is why on Monday evening, at a loose end, he re-posted a mocked-up picture of Super Mario, the computer game character, along with the words “jumps like a black man and grabs coins like a Jew” …

The FA — not before time — has sought to send out the message that such phraseology and such stereotyping is not acceptable in English football. It is a policy that Balotelli, who felt so let down by the football authorities in Italy, would probably applaud if he took a moment to think about. Unfortunately, he rarely thinks until it is too late.

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Posted: 3rd, December 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment

Liverpool Balls: Mario Balotelli Apologises

Mario Balotelli is a good bloke. He’s entertaining. Sure, he posted a stupid picture of ‘Super Mario’ grabbing coin “like a Jew“, but he’s apologised.


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A man who lets of fireworks in his bathroom might not be someone who thinks things through…

Posted: 2nd, December 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment

Bigots Of Wigan Rejoice: You Can Now Attack Liverpool’s Mario Balotelli For Being A Black Jew

Mario Barwuah Balotelli’s mother is a Jew. She’s the daughter of Holocaust surivors. Yep, Mario is a black Jew. This is great news for racists who are tired to attacking the player’s skin tones. They can now broaden their chants.

But is his being the son of a Jew enough to save the Liverpool striker from the censors and offence-seekers?

He hopes so.


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Is Mario Balotelli the self-loathing Jew?



Shut up about what?

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Posted: 2nd, December 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment

Liverpool And Manchester City Balls: Photos of Mario Balotelli’s Post Fireworks Bathrrom

IN readiness for Bonfire Night, the The Daily Mail have obtained photos of Mario Balotelli’s bathroom – the one his friends (not him – no, not him) let off fireworks in. Then with Manchester City, now with Liverpool, Balotelli’s friends (no, not him – his friends) caused £400,000′s worth of damage to the £3 million-valued property in Mottram St Andrew, Cheshire.


Posted: 1st, November 2014 | In: Liverpool, Manchester City, Sports | Comment

Liverpool Balls: Mario Balotelli Has 9 Weeks To Prove Himself

Balotelli Venn


LIVERPOOL Balls: Will it help Mario Balotelli to better settle into life at Anfield if he is continually singled out for treatment? Balotelli could go on a PR drive following his stupid decison to swap shirts at half time with Real Madrid’s Pepe, perhaps reminding kids about the Fireworld Code (never return to a lit bathroom towel etc.).

Or he could just be allowed time and space to repay some of £16m Liverpool invested in him?

In the Times, Liveprool fan Tony Evans writes benath the headline “Mario Balotelli faces fight to rescue Liverpool career”.

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Posted: 24th, October 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment (1)

Mario Balotelli Bombarded With Racist Abuse After ‘LOL’ Man United Tweet


NOW at Liverpool and once of Manchester City, Mario Balotelli tweeted a ‘LOL’ in response toManchester United’s spectacular collapse against Leicester City. Of course, Balotelli’s big-spending Liverpool were only yesterday beaten by West Ham United. So. Manchester United players are free to ‘LOL’ right back at him.

But then Balotelli’s Twitter feed attracted a blitzkerig of abuse.

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Posted: 21st, September 2014 | In: Liverpool, manchester united, Sports | Comment

Highlights Of My Five-Times-A-Night With Liverpool Striker Mario Balotelli

ANORAK enjoys a kiss ‘n’ tell.  Oh, come on, we miss the News of the World. What we enjoy are the details included in the story, the more mundane the better. Today’s kiss ‘n’ tell features Liverpool FC’s Mario Balotelli and “Ashley Cole’s ex”. No. Not Cheryl Cole. It’s Frenchie Eglantine.


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Posted: 21st, September 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment

Liverpool Balls: Mario Balotelli Lets Off Fireworks In The Bedroom

WHEN Mario Balotelli left Manchester City and England a legion of would be mo-dels and kiss ‘n’ tellers sighed. What now for tales of Mario-fuelled pyrotechnics in the bedroom, to go with fireworks in the bathroom?

Thankfully, Liverpool bought the Italian forward.  And readers get to learn what it like to share a “night of passion” with the player:


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Posted: 20th, September 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment

Transfer Balls: Mario Balotelli Plays Joins Manchester United’s Hernandez In Newlook Arsenal Front 5

TRANSFER Balls: A round-up of Mario Balotelli news in the scoop-to-deadline mainstream media:

The Guardian has news:

‘Replaceable’ Mario Balotelli could leave Milan, says agent

Could. Maybe. Any other news?

Striker’s agent says: ‘Mario is sad, desperate’

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Posted: 27th, June 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports | Comment

Transfer Balls: Mario Balotelli Could Play In Defence For Arsenal



TRANSFER Balls: The maisntream media have been linking Mario Balotelli with move to Arsenal. The player hasn’t said a word. Have Arsenal?

Today the Metro says the Gunners have:

Mario Balotelli to Arsenal is pure invention, says Arsene Wenger

News being:

When quizzed over the speculation, Wenger told beIN Sports World Cup show that it was ‘pure invention’.

Invented by..? Well, two days earlier the, er, Metro announced:

Arsene Wenger to meet with Mario Balotelli’s agent to discuss Arsenal transfer

One day later, the Metro had more news:

Arsenal want to sign Mario Balotelli by July 10 to star in Puma kit launch


Arsenal want to complete a deal to sign Mario Balotelli from AC Milan before July 10th – so he can feature in their new kit launch.

It’s left to the Mirror to sum up the facts:

Mario Balotelli could return to the Premier League next season

He could. Just as Wenger could pick himself to play up front. Or pick Mario to play in defence.

He could.

More Transfer Balls every day…

Posted: 25th, June 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports | Comment

Transfer Balls: Arsenal Buy Mario Balotelli Without Ever Speaking To Him Or AC Milan

balotelli stickers


TRANSFER Balls: We begin with the Mirror’s news on Mario Balotelli:

EXCLUSIVE: Arsenal are ready to pay around £25m for AC Milan’s ex-Man City striker Mario Balotelli.


Ex-Man City striker was Italy’s World Cup match-winner against England last weekend but AC Milan want to get him off their wage bill

So. Arsenal might bid for the player? There are no quotes from anyone around AC Milan, Arsenal or the player. That’s an exclusive?

The Daily Star says the Gunners already have bid for him:

Arsenal launch stunning £25m move for AC Milan bad-boy Mario Balotelli

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Posted: 17th, June 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports | Comment

The 18 most unforgettable team photos of all time

DAVID Cameron has played down rugby international Manu Tuilagi’s ‘bunny ears’ gesture as ‘a bit of fun’, and accepted an apology from the player after his impertinent gesture during the British Lions’ photo call at Downing Street.


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Posted: 23rd, September 2013 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment

Mario Balotelli is AC Milan’s tame ‘crazy nigger’

MARIO Balotelli is black. Many Italians have noticed. When Super Mario scored for Italy against Germany at Euro 2012, Tuttosport produced the pun: “Li abbiamo fatti neri.” Literally that translates to “we made them all black”. It’s more akin to “we wiped the floor with them”. But the use of the word “neri” was not accidental.

Elisabetta Povoledo wrote about his time in Italy before joining Manchester City:

While he was still playing in Italy, Mr. Balotelli, like other black athletes who play here, was subject to racist episodes. When newspapers reported that he had revealed in June after a visit to Auschwitz that one of his adoptive parents was of Jewish heritage, an Italian extreme right group posted unprintable slurs on its Web site.

“This past year there were 59 racial incidents during the Italian soccer championship, almost all of them linked to color,’’ said Mauro Valeri, a sociologist and expert in racism in sport. Fines of more than €400,000 were issued, he said. ‘‘Even though measures have been implemented to halt the violence, the fact racism persists should make you think.’’

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Posted: 7th, February 2013 | In: Sports | Comment

Mario Balotelli’s agent ‘doesn’t give a f**k’

IN a division so devoid of any character, the departure of Mario Balotelli from the Premier League is a very sad one. Who can football fans look to now? Suarez? He’s not exactly loveable. Ryan Giggs? Even he managed to make shagging his brother’s girlfriend look dull.

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Posted: 1st, February 2013 | In: Sports | Comment

Look alike: Mario Balotelli is Sleestak (From ‘Land Of The Lost’)

LOOK ALIKE: Manchester City and Italy striker Mario Balotelli is Sleestak (From ‘Land Of The Lost’):

Spotter: Pies

Posted: 4th, July 2012 | In: Sports | Comment

Mario Balotelli is not King Kong – Italy’s Gazzetta dello Sport hardly apologises

HOW has Italy’s Gazzetta dello Sport responded to criticism of its cartoon depicting Mario Balotelli – the Azzurri’s only black player – as a giant monkey called King Kong?

“We can honestly say it was not among the best products of our talented cartoonist. The newspaper is for those who read it and hence, if certain readers found the cartoon offensive, we apologise.”

We apologise not for the picture but if you felt offended. Of course, in the UK being offended is enough to cry “racism”. It’s not the intention that matters but its reception.

The paper adds of cartoonist Valerio Marini:

“At this time, a measure of prudence and good taste are necessary because everything, absolutely everything, can be misinterpreted. But those that accuse Gazzetta, and poor Marini, of racism are going overboard. This newspaper has fought any form of racism in every stadium and has condemned the boos directed at Balotelli as an unacceptable form of incivility.”

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Posted: 27th, June 2012 | In: Sports | Comment

Alan Shearer ghostwrites Mario Balotelli’s autobiography

WHEN Alan Shearer stops being “Alan Shearer” on the telly, he’ll pick up the pen and be “Alan Shearer” the writer. As Alan Shearer says, “You couldn’t have wrote that script.” Last night, Alan Shearer creased his forehead like man sitting on an orange cone with a vacuum-packed brow, and transmitted a thought to the watching millions:

“Balotelli hasn’t achieved anything in his career yet.”

This was no small matter. Shearer wroter of such phrases as “You can see what it means to him — and rightly so” and “They need to win tonight”, who told us when manager of Newcastle United, “It’s what’s in the dressing room that’s got us relegated” (what was it? A giant spider in the bath? A stray turd? Answers on a postcard), had cut through Balotelli’s medals for winning Serie A (2007-08, 2008-09, 2009-10), the Coppa Italia (2009-10), the Supercoppa Italiana (2008) the UEFA Champions League (2009-10), the Premier League (2011-12) and the FA Cup (2010-11), to focus on what defining what we mean by achieving.

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Posted: 25th, June 2012 | In: Sports | Comments (2)

Roy Hodgson to dress John Terry as giant banana when England play Mario Balotelli’s Italy

MARIO Balotelli says he will walk off the field if anyone tosses a banana onto the pitch when Italy play in the Euro 2012 championships in Poland and Ukraine. He will then kill the tosser. Watch out for Italy winning a match and the opposing team’s manager, say England boss Roy Hodgson, detailing a squad member, say John Terry, to play holding a giant inflatable banana.

This might well be the double-whammy England fans yearn for…

Posted: 30th, May 2012 | In: Sports | Comment

What happened when Mario Balotelli ‘stalked’ Lauren Thorne

IN “BALOTELLI STALKED ME”, the Sun leads with news that Mario Balotelli, Manchester City’s charismatic striker, is a stalker? The Sun hates stalking. In 2011, the paper’s Graeme Wilson reported that David Cameron was to make stalking a crime. THe November 2011 story was illustrated with a picture of a black man in a hood.

In March 2012, the Sun told us that David Cameron had “pledged” to make staking a crime. The “obsessives” who stalk women will be brought to justice. Cameron said:

“Stalking is an abhorrent crime. It makes life a living hell for the victims – breaking up relationships, forcing the victims to move house, making them feel they are being watched 24 hours of the day. That is why we are explicitly criminalising stalking, to make sure that justice is done, protect the victims and show beyond doubt that stalking is a crime.”

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Posted: 29th, May 2012 | In: Sports | Comment

The night Mario Balotelli made a drink of his urine

MORE on Mario Balotelli, the unmarried Manchester City striker who allegedly shagged Chloe Evans. Having said Balotelli was crap in bed (maybe it was you, Chloe?), the kiss ‘n’ teller is reported telling the Sun about the “crazy lifestyle of soccer badboy Mario Balotelli”.

The soccer badboy is a talented 21-year-old finding his feet working and living in a foreign country. Balotelli has embraced the prevailing culture by shagging tabloid-friendly English birds and allowing his bathroom to be the venue for a Bonfire Night do. The fire brigade was called and Balotelli’s friends (because it was them – really it was) would to well to read the full firework code, especially the bit about returning to a smouldering toilet roll. But, still, for the Italian Catholic import to be celebrating the death of the Papist Gunpowder Plot is admirable.

Balotelli did say that Manchester “is not to my tastes”. But no great hurt in that. Most Manchester United fans who only ever see the city’s wide open green spaces and ordered seating on the telly agree. And he can always commute from London or Abu Dhabi.

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Posted: 30th, April 2012 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment

Chloe Evans: My sex with Manchester City’s shaven raver Mario Balotelli (photos)

MANCHESTER City striker Mario Balotelli has had sex with Cheadle’s Chloe Evans. Well, so says Chloe Evans, a woman seemingly well placed to see what’s on top of her. Having heard of Balotelli’s sex with “Wayne Rooney hooker” Jenny Thompson, the Sun know hears Evans claim that she too has enabled the Italian footballer to cheat on his usual lover Raffaella Fico.

Allegations from “pretty” Chloe are:

Chloe: “Mario hates pubic hair and before I had ever slept with him he asked me, ‘Do you shave the hair of the p**** ?’ I just laughed and told him not to be so nosey.”

Ruddy curtain twitcher. Go on:

Chloe: “He always shaves all the hair off down below, I’ve never seen him with anything there over all the time I’ve known him.”

Mario loves a Brazilian. Read all about it!

Chloe: “He wasn’t a bad lover as such — let’s just say he liked to take a long time about things. He said sex helped him be better at football, that it improved his stamina. But I had to fake it in the bedroom. Every time.”

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Posted: 29th, April 2012 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment

Mario Balotelli and Wayne Rooney unite warring factions

IS this promotion for Jenny Thomson, formerly Jennifer Thompson, aka Juice Jen, the tabloids’ “Rooney’s hooker”. Although still not named in front-page headlines, Thompson leads the Daily Star’s new coverage as “MARIO’S VICE GIRL”.

Is Mario’s Vice Girl a better epithet than Rooney’s Hooker? There is much to discuss on Sky Daily Sport, the porn and football satellite station.

Today’s news is that:


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Posted: 9th, April 2012 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment

Jennifer Thompson still a ‘tart’ – Balotelli is just ‘Mario’

STILL bad news for Jennifer Thompson, aka Juici Jeni, who despite having scored with Manchester City striker Mario Balotelli and, allegedly, Manchester United’s Wayne Rooney, remains a bystander to her own shag ‘n’ tell. The Daily Star brings its readers :


Although readers are on first name terms with the player who cheated on his lover, Jennifer Thompson is just a “tart”.

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Posted: 6th, April 2012 | In: Sports | Comment