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Posts Tagged ‘names’

Jeremy Corbyn: the tot Trots named Corbyn

Would you call your child ‘Corbyn’? The Daily Star says you might if you drink enough scrumpy cider with your magic mushrooms.

The paper says parents are “flocking” to name their “tots” after the Labour leader, Jeremy Corbyn. No, not Trots, tots. No typo. But are parents really massing at council offices to demand their children are named and renamed after Jeremy Corbyn? The Star says Corbyn’s “cool” was “boosted after appearing on Glastonbury’s Pyramid stage”.  I’d spin that round and say that Glastonbury was stripped of cool when it invited a leading politician to address the crowd and build a personality cult around a man who wants more State control, favours Brexit and has worked for Iran’s theocratic regime.

The fact is that in 2015, 15 children were named Corbyn (source: Office for National Statistics).  The Star reasons that if “festival nookie” results in anything other than a nasty rash and regret, “thousands” more children could be named after the Labour leader.

They could also be named Theresa, if they shagged in a field of wheat.

Posted: 27th, June 2017 | In: News, Politicians, Strange But True | Comment


Kelly Rowland Gives Birth To A Titan

CONGRATS to Kelly Rowland, the former Destiny’s Child singer (the one on Beyonce’s left shadow) has given birth. She tells People magazine:

 “We are blessed to report everyone is healthy and happy! The dad picked out the name. It has to do with his family.”

That name is Titan Jewell.

He’s either a members of the second order of divine beings, or else a keen WWF fan:

 

Screen shot 2014-11-14 at 09.50.48

Posted: 14th, November 2014 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Shocks At The Shelby Leisure Centre Naming Contest

steve

 

AND the winner of the new gym in Selby, North Yorkshire – he wins a year’s free membership – is… Steve Wadsworth, who chose the name ‘Selby Leisure Centre’ for the facility which is set to open in Spring 2015.

Take a bow, Steve:

“I was really surprised and excited to win the membership prize. I’m looking forward to seeing the centre open and being able to use the swimming pool and checking out this fantastic facility for the residents of the Selby area.”

Says Paul Hirst, general manager of the centre:

 “Well done to Steve on winning the competition. It’s great that the residents of Selby have had the chance to play a part in the development of this modern facility, which is set to bring huge benefits back to the community in terms of encouraging people to be active and healthy.”

Selby District Council says that the Selby Leisure Centre exercises your arms as well as your mind…

Posted: 10th, November 2014 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Bad Names: Manchester’s Yewtree Grooming Dog Parlour

Posted: 12th, October 2014 | In: Reviews | Comments (3)


Funny Names: It’s Not Nominative Determinism It’s Just Parental Choice

THE Manchester Evening News has a few words on funny names and nominative determinism:

 

Screen shot 2014-10-10 at 14.58.37

 

The Manchester Evening News

 

Posted: 10th, October 2014 | In: Reviews | Comment


Swedish Man Enjoys Cold Comfort Of Having 63 Names

idiot

 

SAY, hello to Kim-Jong Sexy Glorious Beast Divine Dick Father Lovely Iron Man Even Unique Poh Un Winn Charlie Ghora Khaos Mehan Hansa Kimmy Humbero Uno Master Over Dance Shake Bouti Bepop Rocksteady Shredder Kung Ulf Road House Gilgamesh Flap Guy Theo Arse Hole Im Yoda Funky Boy Slam Duck Chuck Jorma Jukka Pekka Ryan Super Air Ooy Rusell Salvador Alfons Molgan Akta Papa Long Nameh.

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Posted: 2nd, July 2014 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Other Parents’ Kids With Stupid Names: ‘Elektra Esmerelda, a little sister for Dorothy, Wulfstan and Cleopatra’

OTHER Parents’ Kids With Stupid Names: an occasional look at birth announcements he press:

On 22nd March 2014, to Gilly (née Ivil) and Rupert, a daughter, Elektra Esmeralda, a little sister for Dorothy, Wulfstan and Cleopatra..— 9lbs 6ozs.

 

Screen shot 2014-03-29 at 23.00.41

 

Previously. Biggles.

Spotter

 

Posted: 29th, March 2014 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Other Parents’ Kids With Stupid Names: Biggles, Posie and Tuppence JACKSON-KEW

Screen shot 2014-03-28 at 20.02.14

 

OTHER Parents presents those parents who give their ordinary kids extraordinary names:

Biggles and Posie JACKSON-KEW

On 29th March 2013, to Emily (née Kew) and Christian, a son, Biggles George Fittleworth, and a daughter, Posie Betsy Winifred, a brother and sister for Tuppence.
Published in The Times on April 13, 2013

Take them up, Ginger. Higher. Higher. Higher…

 

Posted: 28th, March 2014 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Penzance: How The Market Jew Got His Illuminated Christmas Knickers

penzance pant lights

WHAT do you see when you view the Christmas lights in Penzance, Cornwall.

Some see Christmas puddings.

Others see leopard print underwear dangling from a washing line.

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Posted: 18th, December 2013 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment


Nominative determinism: Janice ‘Lokelani’ Keihanaikukauakahihuliheekahaunaele fights the licence police

Janice Keihanaikukauakahihuliheekahaunaele

JANICE “Lokelani” Keihanaikukauakahihuliheekahaunaele’s (nee Worth) name won’t fit on her driving licence.

Hawaii government computer systems say ‘no’. Next year, the plan is that with advances in computing Jan’s name will fit on her driving licence and ID card. But for now, her name has been changed to comply with the 35 character limit. Says she:

“No-one ever gets away with chopping my name without hearing about it… The policeman looked at my licence and saw I had no first name. I told him it is not my fault that my licence and state ID are not correct and I am trying to get it corrected. He then told me ‘Well, you can always change your name back to your maiden name.’ This hurt my heart. Over the last 22 years I have seen… the culture of Hawaii being trampled upon and this policeman treated my name as if it was mumbo-jumbo.”

Mumbo-Jumo would fit.

Ms Keihanaikukauakahihuliheekahaunaele said the policeman upset her because he was being “disrespectful of the Hawaiian people”.

Really? All of them?

Ms Keihanaikukauakahihuliheekahaunaele – who married into the name in 1992 –  said that her name had many layers of meanings including “one who would stand up and get people to focus in one direction when there was chaos and confusion, and help them emerge from disorder”.

More nominative determinism every week. It’s more than her life’s worth…

Posted: 15th, September 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment


The 22 most unusual names in American political history

THE 22 most unusual, suggestive and bizarre names in American political history:

govnor-teats-1858-1926

Picture 1 of 22

Govnor teats - mother of the nation

Spotter: The Strangest Names In American Political History

Posted: 11th, July 2013 | In: Flashback, Politicians | Comment (1)


The Choir Boy Grooming Room and gym opens in Scotland

Choir boys of the Queen's Chapel in procession to the church of Marlborough House in London.

Choir boys of the Queen’s Chapel in procession to the church of Marlborough House in London.

WHY did Stephen Wilson name his garage gymnasium at East Calder, West Lothian, the Choir Boy Grooming Room? Is he hoping to attract the key and as-yet-untapped clerical keep-fit market? Is the venue more Jim Savile than gym fit?

Neighbours are not happy at the naming and the sign he put up. They called the police.

But Mr Wilson says it’s all a joke:

“I came up with the name because choir boys are seen as quite weak, and grooming, although nowadays is seen as sexual and associated with paedophiles, is also a training term meaning preparing your body and mind for something. I just put a different slant on the name.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, June 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment


Massive Baby Named Jihad Born In Berlin (Photos)

GET a load of little Jihad. The 6-kilogramme (13-pound) boy born to 40-year-old Elfi at Berlin’s Charité hospital.

Doctors says that the massive size of Jihad can be attributed to his mum’s gestational gestational diabetes.

The Local tells readers:

Such newborns are often delivered via caesarean section because they can suffer from oxygen deficiency or shoulder dislocations during birth.

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Posted: 27th, November 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Los Angeles City Council Are Looking For Mike Hunt

TO Los Angeles, where the City Council is looking for Mike Hunt.

Says local official May Dupname…

Posted: 5th, October 2011 | In: Politicians | Comment


Daniel Changes His Name To Emperor Spiderman Gandalf Wolverine Skywalker Optimus Prime Goku Sonic Xavier Ryu Cloud Superman HeMan Batman Thrash

THIS is photo of Baron, formerly Kelvin Borbidge, 22 (right) and Emperor, formerly Daniel Knox-Hewson, 23, in Nottingham.

The duo changed their names to Emperor Spiderman Gandalf Wolverine Skywalker Optimus Prime Goku Sonic Xavier Ryu Cloud Superman HeMan Batman Thrash and Baron Venom Balrog Sabretooth Vader Megatron Vegeta Robotnik Magneto Bison Sephiroth Lex Luthor Skeletor Joker Grind.

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Posted: 2nd, August 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comments (4)


Mariah Carey Wants Everyone To Guess Her Twins Names

MARIAH Carey is, of course, more mental than a tree filled with talking toasters. She became pregnant with twins, which left the universe considering implosion briefly. Could the human race stand Mariah gloating about her working ovaries? Could we collectively take the cloying praise bestowed on her little bundles of disappointments?

One person who doesn’t care about our feelings is Mariah Carey who, for some inexplicable reason, wants us all to guess the names of her newborns, who were brought into the world while Carey was listening to one of her own albums.

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Posted: 3rd, May 2011 | In: Music | Comments (3)


Is Virus Software The World’s Computer Shop Name Ever?

IS VIRUS SOFTWARE the world’s worst name for a computer shop selling…software?

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Posted: 24th, April 2011 | In: Technology | Comment


Chinese Company Names that Say It All

TURD Baby and Watery Coffee Inc. present Chinese company names that say so much about the place…

chinese-business-names

Posted: 15th, April 2011 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment


Young Boozer, Tiny Kox And Other Political Names To Cherish: A Gallery

THE Young Boozer III election signs are a hit. The retired Republican banker from Montgomery, Alabama, won the day. And the locals are keeping the signs and kerb adverts for their home bars. Other names to cherish:

harman-banger

Posted: 8th, November 2010 | In: Politicians | Comment


The Worse School Names Ever: Presented By Massacre Pre-School

SCHOOLS’ have great names, don’t they. There’s the Porny School, in Eton, Titnipple High in Japan, Weed High School and Massacre Pre-School, to name but a few. We’ve made a collection and now present a gallery of the best named schools ever…

Puke Chips – The World’s Worst Product Names

Logos – Sexually Suggestive Ones

bad-school-names

Posted: 30th, September 2010 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment


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