Namibia elects Adolph Hitler

Old campaigners and neo-voters will be disappointed to learn that Adolf Hitler has no plans for world domination. Adolf Hitler Uunona, newly elected to represent the Ompundja constituency in the former German colony of Namibia, tells Bild his politics has “nothing to do” with Nazi ideology.

Hard cheese, indeed, on those hearing the news of Adolph Hilter’s victory and thought it the right moment to emerge from their Brazilian hideaways, Austrian bier kellars and, well, Switzerland to march again. (Not that they ever hid – more than half of the leadership of the West German Justice Ministry were former members of the Nazi party, including dozens of former paramilitary SA members.)

Mr Uunona says his father had named him after the Nazi leader, but said “he probably didn’t understand what Adolf Hitler stood for. As a child I saw it as a totally normal name. It wasn’t until I was growing up that I realised: This man wanted to subjugate the whole world. I have nothing to do with any of these things.”

Anorak

Posted: 4th, December 2020 | In: News, Politicians, Strange But True | Comment

Angelina Jolie Goes Back To Namibia

IN this week’s Hello! we learn that Coleen Rooney hosts a party in which her unborn baby was the “star party guest”, Angelina Jolie makes a return to Namibia, Andrea Corr is married – exclusively! – and Jason Durr gets his twins…

To Coleen’s Rooney’s Cheshire party.

It turns out that Coleen didn’t order the tattooist but went for the sonographer, who brought along a 4D scanning machine to the party.

“You can see the baby’s features and movement,” says a source.

Pictured.

JASON Durr is an actor on Heartbeat.

He’s also father to twins: Felix Montgomery and Velvet Josephine. Should they ever make it big in the world of showbizniz, Felix is a shoo-in for the cat food gig and Velvet can get the pantyliner contract.

They will also share a terrific anecdote, nay, an “extraordinary, emotional journey that proceeded their arrival”. You see: “The twins were conceived with the help of a Los Angeles-based egg donor…”

In the current climate of Julia Roberts’ twins, Jennifer Lopez’s twins, Sarah Jessica Parker’s twins, Ricky Martin’s twins and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s twins. Showbiz IVF twins are about as extraordinary as the news that Jordan sleeps on her back.

ON the front page of Hello! is news of “exclusive photos” of the wedding of Andrea Corr to A. Billionaire.

The photos are indeed stunning because there is not shot of the actual wedding, just shots of the wedding party entering a church in Ireland.

Hello! no longer has scoops – it just has a few pictures. And to prove it, the magazine once more dredges up its pictures of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt in Namibia for the birth of Shiloh Jolie-Pitt (may her name be forever held in the highest organ).

Is it too early to talk of the death of Hello?

Anorak

Posted: 25th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment