Anorak

News | Anorak

Posts Tagged ‘News’

What does it say on Ernest Shackleton’s CV?

Sir Ernest Henry Shackleton

What does it say?

 

Sir Ernest Shackleton (5 February 1874 – 5 January 1922) died on an exhibition to the Antarctic. In December 1903 the great explorer applied to be Secretary of the The Royal Scottish Geographical Society (RSGS). Indeed, he got the job on January 11 1904, acting as the RSGS’s Secretary from 1904-1905.

The RSGS’s current writer-in-residence Jo Woolf has found a copy of Shackleton’s CV. They want to know what it says in the margin. There are pencil notes (see above).  You can let them know by writing to enquiries@rsgs.org.

Spotter: Mysterious Universe 

Posted: 12th, September 2017 | In: Celebrities, News | Comment


The greatest news story of 2016 involves train, man, chips and seagulls

This might be the greatest news story of 2016:

Screen Shot 2016-02-01 at 12.10.10

Mikey Nicholson @Mikey_Nicholson It's early days but this may be the story of 2016.

 

Spotter: @Mikey_Nicholson

 

Posted: 1st, February 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)


21st Century news: ‘My Baby Bump Was Poo’

story

Posted: 17th, October 2015 | In: Reviews | Comment


Kent head teacher in biased ‘schoolgirl’ story shocker

Sean Heslop

 

News is that “top teacher” Sean Heslop, 47, is, reportedly, expecting a child – with a former pupil. We don’t get to know her age in the Sun’s “exclusive” report on the “Pregnant Teen Pupil”, but the paper does label her a “girl”.

That’s a pretty loaded word. Girl. Not ‘young woman’ or ‘woman’. Girl.

The age of consent is 16. There is nothing to suggest she was below the age when she and Mr Heslop allegedly formed a relationship.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 9th, April 2015 | In: Reviews | Comment


Dead man muck-raking: FIFA told talks with Blatter

THERE’S something near-admirable about the way Sepp Blatter runs FIFA. He clearly couldn’t give the slightest of tosses about people knowing what he’s been up to. He’s got the crooked swagger of Emperor Palpatine, cackling his way around the corridors of power, cackling ‘really though, what are you going to do about it?’

You suspect that he’s got a room filled with folders, with the most unspeakably awful dirt on some of his colleagues who are brave enough to challenge him.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 22nd, December 2014 | In: Sports | Comment


Hereford United debacle continues as club suspended by FA

THE mess that has befallen the supporters of Hereford United took a fresh turn today, as the club have now been suspended “from all football activity” by the FA.

Hereford and club official Alan McCarthy have been punished for failure to comply with regulations under the owners’ and directors’ test and a statement from the FA said: “Having failed to comply with the orders of the Independent Regulatory Commission, both Hereford United and Alan McCarthy are suspended from all football and football activity with immediate effect.”

“The club and Mr McCarthy, Officer of Hereford United FC, were ordered to fully and correctly comply with their obligations under the Owners’ and Directors’ Test Regulations by 4pm on Thursday 4 December 2014.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 11th, December 2014 | In: Sports | Comment


Brendan Jordan arrives: the gayest boy in the world advertises for American Apparel

 

Your hero in the above video is Brendan Jordan, the 15-year-old lurker who seized his chance when local news filmed in his area.

Said Master Jordan:

“I just saw a camera, and did my thing. I was imagining myself as if I were Lady Gaga, and that no one could destroy me.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 8th, December 2014 | In: Fashion | Comment


The List of Things Banned From UK-Made Porn

Actress Elaine Barrie observes as actor John Barrymore, Sr., demonstrates the spanking scene on director Otto Preminger in "My Dear Children," during rehearsals, Jan. 1940, in New York. (AP Photo)

Actress Elaine Barrie observes as actor John Barrymore, Sr., demonstrates the spanking scene on director Otto Preminger in “My Dear Children,” during rehearsals, Jan. 1940, in New York. (AP Photo)

 

WHEN you hear that a government is getting involved in porn, you’d be forgiven that they were hiding schoolboys in an attic and filming them suffering unimaginable horrors and sweeping the whole thing under the rug while shouting “LOOK! FOREIGN PEOPLE! THEY’RE THE ONES YOU SHOULD BE CONCERNED ABOUT!”

Alas, British MPs are responsible for the country’s moral conduct as well, which means they’re the ones putting a modesty blanket on things like films, magazine and adverts.

So, with that, we look at the things that have just been banned in UK-made pornography… and even the prudish among you might be surprised at what is considered illegal to film in Britain, thanks to an amendment to the 2003 Communications Act.

And it seems that female pleasures are the things being hit hardest.

The Audiovisual Media Services Regulations 2014 requires that video-on-demand (VoD) online porn now adhere to the same guidelines laid out for DVD sex shop-type porn by the British Board of Film Censors (BBFC), with the board seemingly taking a random approach to deciding what is acceptable sex.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 2nd, December 2014 | In: Reviews | Comments (2)


Headmaster Found Giving Head to Maths Teacher

IT wasn’t that long ago we had the scandal of a teacher having it away with a 16 year old student in Argentina (and the subsequent video ending up on a porn site), and now, there’s another one.

A headmaster has been filmed by students giving head to a female maths teacher.

Over in Slovenia, students heard groaning coming from what a empty classroom, and it wasn’t the type of moans that result from having too much marking to do. Of course, being nosey, the kids investigated and whipped out their phones.

brg8ba5ccgfd3dqbeitq

There, they found 41 year old married father of two Drago Kamenik with his head between the legs of 45 year old maths teacher Manja Meterlj. You can assume they initially thought it would be two students at it, but when they found out it was a pair of teachers, well, you can imagine what ran through their minds.

It is worth pointing out that Drago Kamenik has strenuously denied the claims of his pupils, saying that the video has been doctored and his face photoshopped on. Sadly for Kamenik, this sounds like a married man caught playing away and desperately clutching for something to get him off the hook.

He said: “The man in the video is not me, it has been photoshopped. I also spoke to my wife. Can these fools even begin to imagine what damage they have caused by doing this?! As for the maths teacher, she is a very good teacher and has had many positive things said about her.”

And now, Drago has contacted the police and is threatening to sue.

However, the students have replied, saying that they upload another video clip to prove it’s him. If the headmaster IS guilty, then he’s chosen one of the worst enemies in the world: Tech-savvy, spotty teenage boys.

And here’s a grotty still from the video, should you be at all interested in that sort of thing, or demanding some kind of evidence.

drago kamenik

Posted: 2nd, December 2014 | In: NSFW, Reviews | Comment (1)


Cellino disqualified from Leeds United and how not to run a football club

SINCE the fallout of Peter Risdale’s creative interpretation of debt, Leeds United have been a mess. Even if you loathe the club (hello Manchester United fans and Brian Clough’s ghost), you have to feel sorry for the Leeds fans.

They went from Champions League cup runs, to playing in the third tier of English football, Leeds’ financial implosion is up there with the worst (notably Portsmouth and Rangers).

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 1st, December 2014 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Could Wembley be the home for new NFL franchise?

THE second NFL league match takes place at Wembley this weekend, after the success of the Raiders-Dolphins match last month. Of course, American Football is still a puzzle to many (good thing we’ve got a beginner’s guide here), but the popularity of the game grows hugely in the UK.

And now, it looks like London is moving ever closer to hosting a new NFL franchise after George Osborne opened talks with the American Football authorities. Everyone hopes it’ll be better than the London Monarchs which, was a nice idea executed badly (not to mention the awful kit they had).

The Chancellor is looking at pushing on with the idea of an NFL team being based at Wembley permanently.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 22nd, November 2014 | In: Sports | Comment


Brass Banned: Let’s Pray The Dire England Band Get The Chop After Scotland Game

NO-ONE really likes the England Brass Band that blight England’s international matches. The droning, metronomic thud takes all the spontaneity out of crowd singing and acts as an active drain on the will to live.

Now, the Football Association is going to be asked some tough questions about them after their appearance at the England-Scotland friendly, which saw the English winning 3-1.

While there was mercifully little trouble surrounding the game, the England supporters band will be finding themselves in hot water after they played along with fans singing off-colour songs in the stands.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 19th, November 2014 | In: Sports | Comment


Roy Keane Has Another Pop At The Manchester United mafia

THERE’S not many nice words being thrown the way of Manchester United from Roy Keane of late. His second instalment of his autobiography has seen some sweary extracts lobbed like grenades toward Old Trafford.

And he’s not done yet.

With an audience in Dublin, Keane let loose again, claiming that former Manchester United players are acting “like a mafia” in their roles ambassadors at Old Trafford, or when they’re being pundits on the club’s in-house TV channel.

 

Keane levelled particular criticism at Bryan Robson and Paddy Crerand: “When I look at United, there’s just a lot of propaganda now. A lot of nonsense gets spoken, a lot of ex-players now work for the club, they are on contracts, ex-players from the ’60s and ’70s working for United and they always try to kid you on.”

“That’s why I took a step back from Man United. They’re all decent lads, don’t get me wrong, but it’s almost like a mafia situation. People get swayed by Paddy Crerand. Paddy still thinks it’s [1967]! United have lost 5-0: ‘Ah, you know, they were great.’ Paddy, come on, do me a favour. ‘No, no, United were great.’ No, they weren’t! Why are you saying it?”

And what about Captain Marvel?

Roy was lambasted by Robbo when he suggested United midfielder Nani deserved a red card in Sir Alex Ferguson’s final game in the Champions League against Real Madrid.

Keane said: “My opinion was Nani meant it, he saw the guy coming, and he definitely meant it. The guy deserved to be sent off, but I remember Robbo the next day. Robbo works for Man United. A great player he was, but he’s employed by Man United, so he’s got to comment on Man United, and what do you think he’s going to say?”

“‘Keaney’ – and I can still remember saying him saying it like that – ‘Keaney was the only one at Old Trafford who thought it was a red card.’ Well, the fucking referee thought it was a red card!”

Of course, there’s a few people who think Keano is just a sad, jealous ol’ dear, but Roy insists that this isn’t the case and that he’s not at all “bitter and twisted” and doesn’t intend for his book tour to be a mission to have a pop at anyone who has been negative towards him in the past.

That’s a shame. Most of us have been enjoying Keane calling bullshit on a number of people. Someone feed him hot-bolts to get his dander up while showing him photos of Mick McCarthy!

Posted: 18th, November 2014 | In: Sports | Comment


Manchester United: Now Offering Money to Players To Go Away

BEFORE this season, Manchester United have signed a host of players that haven’t exactly lived up to the hype. While Alex Ferguson has signed some incredible players like Cantona, Ronaldo and Denis Irwin, he’s also the man who threw money at David Bellion, Bebe, Eric Djemba-Djemba, Jordi Cruyff, Karel Poborsky, William Prunier and Kléberson.

Another one of Fergie’s Flops is Anderson, who has given Manchester United the kind of performances that suggest he’d struggle to walk into a Championship team, let alone another one of Europe’s giants.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 4th, November 2014 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment


Qatar 2022: The Winter World Cup

THE farce that is Qatar 2022 continues, with workers’ rights being chucked in the bin, allegations of bribery abounding and, of course, the playing of a football tournament in a country that doesn’t have any stadiums and the kind of weather that negates the beautiful game.

There’s been talk of a winter World Cup for a while, much to the chagrin of 99% of football fans. For a start, a World Cup in Winter would land in the middle of the club’s football season.

However, all this doesn’t matter because money is talking loudest and senior, influential football figures have backed proposals that could see the Qatar 2022 World Cup being hosted at the same time as the Winter Olympics. In the meeting was Premier League chief executive Richard Scudamore and Football Association general secretary Alex Horne, along with the head of the Qatar 2022 organising committee Hassan Al Thawadi and other representatives from domestic leagues and regional confederations.

BBC Sport understand that talks at FIFA’s headquarters in Zurich have resulted in support for a Winter tournament, which would be held in January and February or November and December. Of course, no final decision has been made, but it is looking increasingly likely that this is going to happen. FIFA are adamant that the tournament cannot take place in summer because of the extremely hot temperatures in Qatar.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 3rd, November 2014 | In: Sports | Comment


Watch the NASA’s Antares Rocket Blow-Up From Loads of Angles!

PA-17634159

 

THERE’S something in the human psyche that loves seeing things blow-up. Explosions are even better when there’s no casualties, because you can just enjoy the show without wanting to vomit with the weight of it all.

Yesterday, NASA launched the unmanned Orbital Sciences Corp Antares rocket as part of a $1.9billion contract, however, it didn’t make it out of the atmosphere as it turned into a huge molten fireball seven seconds above the ground, before crashing back into the earth, blowing up everywhere.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 30th, October 2014 | In: Reviews, Technology | Comment


Catwalk Pop: Models who sashayed to the microphone

Burberry Prorsum Catwalk - London Fashion Week 2013

 

THE news today is that supermodel Cara Delevingne has hired Pharrell Williams to give her what she needs as she makes her musical bow.

A source told The super soaraway Sun: “They’re going to release the song without warning, complete with video and global launch. They seem to have formed a great little writing collective and apparently it’s a huge song.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 22nd, October 2014 | In: Music | Comment


BBC God Only Knows: The Song of the Apocalypse

THE BBC have made a charity single and that’s a nice thing. Of course, that doesn’t mean you can’t take the piss. The record – an all-star version of the Beach Boys’ ‘God Only Knows’ – is for Children In Need and isn’t unlike the BBC All-Star version of ‘Perfect Day’, a song about being on smack.

And so, here at Anorak, we’re doing a play-by-play of the video, looking at the deeper meaning behind the video and generally rinsing anyone involved in it.

Of course, with these grand affairs, you have to put a Marks & Spencer Christmas Advert sheen on everything, which means Victoriana and some pointless classical music bollocks.

The BBC don’t disappoint, kicking things off with a bearded conductor and an orchestra piddling about with their instruments.

 

god only knows bbc 1

 

Then, before you know it, the stars come rolling out thick and fast, headed up by Pharrell who, even though we’re in the throes of Autumn’s mental weather, is still showing off his aversion to socks. The lunatic.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 8th, October 2014 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment


Kevin Pietersen Shoots His Mouth Off At Everyone

PA-18553605

 

CRICKET, to the uninitiated, has always seemed perfectly quaint and polite. Of course, cricket fans know that within the sport is some of the most brutal trash-talking, ego maniacs and a lot of heavy drinking.

Even the ever-so-English David Gower, who played the grinning straight man on panel show They Think It’s All Over, was a lunatic. In 1991, he went for a joy-ride in a Tiger Moth biplane after they’d been dismissed in a match, before posing with his plane in the papers the next day. Even though his captain, Graham Gooch was apoplectic with rage, it didn’t stop Gower, during the fourth Test at Adelaide, walking out to the crease to the tune of Those Magnificent Men in their Flying Machines.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 6th, October 2014 | In: Sports | Comment


Find Out Who Will Win at the MOBO Awards 2014

THE MOBO Awards have doled out their nominations, inevitably prompting spectacularly thick people to say “WHY DON’T WE GET A MOWO AWARDS EH?” Classical music awards are exactly that, you berk.

Anyway, Sam Smith and Krept & Konan lead this year’s nominations with three nods each and the event will take place at the SSE Arena, Wembley on October 22nd, which is pretty fancy for it’s 19th year in business.

As well as Krept & Konan and Sam Smith, Fuse ODG, Beyonce, Meridian Dan, Tinie Tempah, FKA Twigs, Katy B, Chris Brown, Kendrick Lamar and MNEK get a look-in too.

In even better news, the ceremony will be broadcast on ITV2 this year.

Discussing the news, MOBO founder Kanya King said: “As we enter our 19th year, the MOBO Awards show promises to be bigger and more audacious than ever. This year’s nominees represent an incredible crop of artists. I find it particularly exciting to see so many underground artists featured, who’ve reached new heights over the last year and broken into the wider consciousness.”

“It’s testament to their talent and their determination to succeed and we are very proud to witness their successes to date. This year’s show at Wembley is set to be nothing short of spectacular”.

 

MOBO_-_Nominations

If you fancy a flutter, we’re going to arrogantly predict who will win. If you land a big bet, we want a round of drinks off you. We’re not kidding.

There’s a very strong bunch of nominees, so let’s have a look.

 

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 24th, September 2014 | In: Music | Comment


Jake Bugg: Everything That’s Wrong in Modern Music

PA-20727527

 

ONCE upon a time, rock and pop lived together in perfect harmony and music fans didn’t feel the need to pick sides. Then, at some point in the ’80s, indie music came and spoiled it all, taking up the same opinion as people like Morrissey, who needlessly hit out at anything that was vaguely popular.

In 2014, too many White Artists With A Guitar (WAWAGs, pronounced Waaaaaaaah Wags) feel the need to hit out against pop music because it makes them feel more authentic when they talk about ‘real music’ and other horsepiss.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 22nd, September 2014 | In: Music | Comment


R Kelly Misses The Jeering Laughter As He Announces New Trapped In The Closet Episodes

COMPLETELY insane he may be, but the Colonel Kurtz of Soul, R Kelly has made an announcement that will reverberate around the halls of the sneering mockers the world over. Despite his alleged fondness for urinating on young women and creating baffling songs like Real Talk and Shut Up, nothing has come close to R Kelly’s ego-lunacy project, Trapped In The Closet.

And, startlingly, he’s made more episodes of the bizarre pop-opera so he can finally share some of its‘mysteries’ with us. We suspect one mystery he’ll be leaving well alone is ‘why did he think it was a good idea to make an soul-operetta about a midget, a gay pastor and mystery package.’

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 15th, September 2014 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Kardashian Functional Sex and Beckingham Palace

THE Kardashians are a gruesome spectacle, determined to tell us all about the ins-and-outs of their lives. Quite literally. Of course, we saw the ins-and-outs of Kim’s life when her sex tape with Ray J got leaked online, turning her into a star overnight. Since then, she’s… well… done very little of worth, apart from a very brief marriage to a man who throws balls at a hoop for a living.

With the untold wealth that comes with Kim K’s life, she’s looking at buying a house in Europe. A bedsit in Montrose? A terrace in Telford? Of course not! She’s looking at buying Beckingham Palace – David and Victoria Beckham’s mansion in Hertfordshire.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 15th, September 2014 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Your All-Purpose 24-7 Rolling News Report

WITH TV news on 24 hours a day 7 days a week, every story must be teased out to last as long as it can. Even with no or few facts available, the wily news reporter can string things out for 24 hours a day 7 days a week until all the facts are in and we go live to…

 

Posted: 3rd, September 2014 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


In Praise Of The Newsroom Typewriter: The Journalists’ Orchestra

The newsroom at the New York Times is seen as editorial staffers work feverishly to prepare a Monday edition, in this Nov. 5, 1978 file photo. A reader-submitted question related to how newsrooms are alerted to breaking news stories is being answered as part of an Associated Press Q&A column called "Ask AP." (AP Photo/Ron Frehm, File)

The newsroom at the New York Times is seen as editorial staffers work feverishly to prepare a Monday edition, in this Nov. 5, 1978 file photo. A reader-submitted question related to how newsrooms are alerted to breaking news stories is being answered as part of an Associated Press Q&A column called “Ask AP.” (AP Photo/Ron Frehm, File)

 

I LOVE newspapers. Working in a newsroom was, to me, the most exciting job I could imagine. And then it changed. I’ve been in many newsrooms and one thing holds true for all of them: they are so quiet. But the Times is trying to change all that.

To the surprise of Times journalists, a tall speaker on a stand has been erected in the newsroom to pump out typewriter sounds, to increase energy levels and help reporters to hit deadlines. The audio begins with the gentle patter of a single typewriter and slowly builds to a crescendo, with the keys of ranks of machines hammering down as the paper’s print edition is due to go to press.

The development, which was described as a “trial” today by publisher News UK, has caused some bemusement among journalists, one of whom tried unsuccessfully to turn the sound off. The idea is one of a series of experiments introduced as The Times and other News UK titles have departed Wapping for new offices in the Baby Shard, London Bridge, South London.

 

When first blackouts were ordered, Seattle Times newsroom was blacked out by painting windows with black paint. Editors found that this was a little hard on the eyes, as the black paint absorbed most of the light. Next step was “de-blacking the blackout" Dec. 19, 1941. Blackened windows were in turn painted white on the inside of the glass thus making the room much cheerier to work in. (AP Photo) Ref #: PA.9074747  Date: 19/12/1941

When first blackouts were ordered, Seattle Times newsroom was blacked out by painting windows with black paint. Editors found that this was a little hard on the eyes, as the black paint absorbed most of the light. Next step was ““de-blacking the blackout” Dec. 19, 1941. Blackened windows were in turn painted white on the inside of the glass thus making the room much cheerier to work in. (AP Photo)
Date: 19/12/1941

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 29th, August 2014 | In: Reviews | Comment