Posts Tagged ‘Nominative Determinism’
Tiger Woods’ Women: The Jaimee Grubbs Nominative Determinism Picture Gallery
TIGER Woods’ alleged mistress, Jaimee Grubbs is seen leaving Firefly in Studio City in Los Angeles, USA – spotted by Anorak’s golf correspondent, Teresa Green, cock-a-hoop that finally she can report on something other than boring men escaping their wives by putting things into holes. Here are pictures of shy, demure Jaimee, the 24-year-old surely now former Las Vegas cocktail waitress and star of the TV show… Tool Academy. Oh, nominative determinism, cruel mistress of Tiger Woods and Jaimee Grubbs…
Posted: 3rd, December 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Tiger Woods Crash: After Rachel Uchitel Meet Jaimee Grubbs
TIGER Woods Crash: Having introduced Elin Nodegren’s Kobe Grip And Rachel Uchitel’s denial, now hear from Jamiee Grubbs. Oh, nominative determinism is at it again.
Before we hear from Jaimee know that the Celebrity Police Force is to charge Tiger Woods with “careless driving” and failing to give them an autogaph.
Anorak’s Man in LA takes up the story of Ms Grubbs, Grubb Street’s new favourite date:
THE flood gates are open, and all of Tiger Woods’ mistresses are pouring out and into the public eye.
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Posted: 1st, December 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Nominative Determinism: Nomad The Cat Is Missing
CONTINUING Anorak’s look at nominative determinism – the science by which a person’s destiny is determined by their name – we meet Nomad the cat. Or at least we would meet her – only, she’s gone missing…
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Posted: 1st, December 2009 | In: Strange But True | Comment
Mr Rugg Delivers The Polar Bear Song To A Drowned Wales
IN today’s Polar Bear Watch, we sing The Polar Bear Song – Bjorn The Polar Bear – available on BBC iPlayer or live on Wednesday, 23:20 on BBC Two Wales-under-sea. The song is the work of Tom Rugg, keeping us warm with a sing song. Rugg by name, rug by nominative determinism…
Tom Rugg, a biology teacher from Chepstow, has written The Polar Bear Song to raise awareness of climate change among children. In an exclusive video diary for the Green Wales season, follow Tom to Hudson Bay in Canada to meet Polar Bears International and ask questions on climate change from his pupils. The organisation will use the song to raise awareness of the impact of global warming in the Arctic. See how the sea ice is decreasing and the bears go hungry. Can a song help to save the bears?
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Amazon Eve: World’s Tallest Glamour Model In Pictures
MEET tall glamour model Amazon Eve. She’s 6ft 8inches tall.she is 30 years old. Amazon Eve might not be her real name, but if it is, it is a fine nominative determinism in action.
Our Man in LA tells us:
Something else to be thankful for on this holiday… that you’re not a 6-foot-8-inch swimsuit model named “Amazon Eve.” Just a little about Eve: She’s 30 years old and hails from Redondo Beach, California. She recently burst onto the Australian modeling scene with a spread in a magazine called “Zoo Weekly.” Pictures:
Posted: 27th, November 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (6)
Nominative Determinism: Mr Fry Represents The Obese
MORE nominative determinism now as Mr Fry speaks form his position of – ready? -Honorary Chairman of the National Obesity Forum.
Mr Tam Fry reacts to a draft report by the Scientific Advisory Committee on Nutrition (SACN), in which “experts” suggest that the daily intake of calories be increased by 16 per cent.
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Posted: 16th, November 2009 | In: Strange But True | Comment
In Pictures: Free Jimmy Choo For H&M, In Pastry
JIMMY Choo is London’s most famous cobbler. he is one letter aways from being Jimmy Choos and thus a product of nominative determinism. As it is we wrestle with Jimmy Choo, which should be pronouned as in ‘choux’, the pastry.
Anorak was there to see Jimmy Choux unveil his range for H&M, which is pronounced HAM. The pictures feature Sophie Ellis Bextor, Jameela Jemil, Jade Parfitt and Jasmine Guinness, Amber Le Bon, Ben Grime, Jenni Falconer, Lola Lennox, Tamara Ecclestone, Little Boots, Nicola Roberts, Alexandra Burke and anyone else with two feet after a freebie.
8029055
Posted: 14th, November 2009 | In: The Consumer | Comment
I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here Sacks Katie Price
THE year is now divided into TV shows: And November means I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!, staring Katie Price in the sack and out of a bikini.
While the BBC’s care home-focused non-dancing dance show Strictly Come Dancing – does anyone allowed to operate the remote control watch it? – ITV follows the X Factor with another hit.
The show features the following celebrities, who would once have been called “personalities” and before that “VIPs”:
George Hamilton – Does the Hollywood legends know the sun cannot reach the jungle floor? Big risk that his tan might suffer. Expects a deep mahogany giving way to light maple as the show progresses.
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Posted: 12th, November 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (14)
Euro Lottery Winners Yet To Pay Back Loan
CONGRATS to Les Scadding and his wife Samantha Peachey-Scadding from Caerleon, south Wales, seen here holding a cheque for 45.5 million, after scooping the prize in Saturday’s Euromillions jackpot.
You lend some people a fiver… Joke. Really. A joke. (They can afford lawyers for a whole week – we need to get the apology in early.)
Peachey by name…
Posted: 10th, November 2009 | In: Money | Comments (3)
X Factor: Simon Cowell Cracks A Joke
MORE X Factor news now as Simon Cowell loses the show when Lucie Jones is rejected and Jedward murder another day. Only, Simon Cowell can’t lose. Let’s review the facts:
Cowell Loses
Ipswich Evening Star: “X-FACTOR: Joke is on Simon Cowell this time”
Nominative determinism now as Nigel Pickover looks back at the X Factor:
The joke is on you this time Mr Cowell – and I believe The X-Factor is less of a show because of it.
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Posted: 9th, November 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Nutt And The Call For Cocaine To Be New Gold Standard
PROFESSOR David Nutt, has been sacked as the Government’s chief advisor on drugs’ misuse policy for saying that booze is worse for you than LSD and hash.
“Alcohol ranks as the fifth most harmful drug after heroin, cocaine, barbiturates and methadone. Tobacco is ranked ninth. Cannabis, LSD and ecstasy, while harmful, are ranked lower at 11, 14 and 18 respectively.”
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X Factor: Finding Another Reason To Hate Gay Danyl Johnson
THE media hatchet job on the X Factor Danyl Johnson continues as the NoTW screams:
Danyl Johnson’s 100% gay
Not too long ago, the NoTW told us that Danyl Johnson was “bi”, which made him 50% gay.
I’VE DAN IT WITH BOYS AND GIRLS
Now we get the fact that he is 100% gay. Or as the sub-header puts it:
EX BOSS RECKONS X FACTOR STAR’S BISEXUAL BOAST IS JUST A POSE
Paige Bond, who managed his old band, said he was NEVER interested in women but was terrified that admitting he was gay would wreck his shot at stardom.
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Posted: 1st, November 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (10)
Nominative Determinism With Rape Artist Kok Foo Lim
IN today’s look at nominative determinism – the science of taking after your name – Anorak spots Kok Foo Lim, who posed as a taxi driver with the intend of luring drunk men into his car and then sexually assaulting them.
The District Court in Perth, Australia, finds Kok Fool Lim guilty of 15 counts of sexual penetration without consent, 11 counts of indecent assault and one count of unlawful wounding.
It’s all very grim:
Many of the victims were unaware of the crimes committed against them until contacted by police and shown photos or videos of the offences.
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Posted: 19th, October 2009 | In: Strange But True | Comment
Woman Denies Oral Sex In Humpty Doo Sex Case
THE Humpty Doo Sex Case trundles on as Allyson White responds to the accusation that she was performing a “sex act” on a man when he crashed in Darwin’s rural area. Ms White says it is “absolutely wrong“. And she has proof:
“I was not sucking his d*** – and it’s pretty obvious that wasn’t the case … you only have to look at the mark on my chest.
“Clearly I had my seatbelt on, so it’s impossible that I’d be leaning over sucking his d*** unless he is hung like a donkey or I’ve got a f****** rubber neck.
“If it was true I’d just cop it sweet and think ‘how embarrassing, I got caught sucking someone’s d***’ – but it is not true and that’s what is p****** me off.
“It didn’t happen like that at all – he was just going too fast.”
Police had earlier reported that the 33-year-old driver was distracted by the woman passenger and went off the road, smashing his single cab Hilux ute into a concrete drain on Pioneer Rd in… Humpty Doo.
Ms White continues:
“I don’t understand where that story has come from. It may have looked bad when police first arrived as my girls were hanging out all over the place. I also had a $5 note wedged between my boobs so they probably just assumed I was a sex worker or something and he’d already paid me. But $5 is a bit cheap for a head job.”
With complementary airbags…
Posted: 13th, October 2009 | In: Strange But True | Comment
Supermarket Bans Under 25s From Buying Daily Mail And All Newspapers
ANORAK likes to spot new trends in journalism, and we bring you tales from the aisles, the casebooks of the supermarket police force, who serve to ban you from buying inappropriate goods.
One day supermarkets will ban under 25s from buying newspapers, full as they with scare stories and porn. But not many under 25s buy them, so there may not be any need to bother.
The essential Bournemouth Echo reports on the defiantly named Gill Power-Forward, a product of nominative determinism who will not be stopped:
Gill Power-Forward had just finished at the check-out at the Canford Heath Asda store and was handing the heavier of the two bags to her strapping teenage son Andrew to take to the car. But she was stunned to be stopped by the cashier, who insisted she carry the heavy bag herself because it had the bottle of wine in – and her son might drink it…
As a strapping lad…
Gill said: “I didn’t know what to say. The world’s gone mad was all I could think – it’s crazy. Suppose I’d been in a wheelchair and was unable to carry the bag.”
Or had to put the bag on your lap. Suppose.
The Guardian brings news from Leeds, and introduces the idea that the shopper’s profession in relevant:
Management consultant Jackie Slater thought she was completing a normal shopping trip to Morrisons until the checkout assistant demanded to see her ID before scanning two bottles of wine.
Management consultants, eh. Would you trust one?
“I told her I was really flattered, but I was the wrong side of 50,” she said. But the assistant pointed to her 17-year-old daughter, Emily, and her 18-year-old niece, Annice, who were standing at the end of the checkout chatting.
“She asked: ‘Are they with you?’ I said they’d come to help me carry the bags back to the car. The assistant said: ‘You could be buying the wine for them. It’s the policy – I have to see everyone’s ID to make sure they are all over 18’.”
And in the Mail:
RAF officer banned from buying alcohol because he was shopping with son, 17
That an RAF officer had to buy his own booze is disgusting enough. But this is too much.
And what about her:
Karen Dumelow is 46. She looks younger. She at a branch of Tesco with her 14-year-lold daughter Emily. She is buying two bottles of wine (white).
The cashier asks for ID. Karen Dumelow is by trade a “fraud investigator”. Says mum to the Porstmouth News:“The checkout assistant asked Emily for ID and I just told her that obviously she didn’t have any because she is only 14 years old.”
Obviously. And, perhaps, not an ID she wanted to show her mum.
For some it’s booze. For Tesco’s it’s spoons. Tesco’s moves with the times:
Emma Sheppard is unable to buy a packet of teaspoons from her local Tesco’s in Evesham, Worcester. The check out operative has studied the ‘Think 25′ scheme, and wonders if Emma is old enough – over 25 – to buy teaspoons.
Says Emma:
“When the assistant asked me for ID I thought John had sneakily put some booze in the trolley, but then when she held up a pack of spoons we looked at her like she was an idiot.
“We were both a bit taken aback really – what are you going to do with a packet of spoons that means you need ID to buy them? In this crazy world we live in, you have to be over 18 to buy teaspoons it seems.”
Read: Tesco Introduces Products For Over 65s Only
Emma is housewife, says the Mail, which showcases these type of stories to show just how hideous the country becomes when Daily Mail readers rise to positions of authority….
Posted: 11th, October 2009 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
Max Payne: Alabama’s Nominative Determinism Death Row
A DEPRESSING case of nominative determinism in Alabama’s death row where inmate Max Landon Payne – Max Payne – is scheduled to be put to death.
An attorney for Alabama death row inmate Max Landon Payne says he doesn’t expect to file last-minute appeals to stop Thursday’s scheduled execution.
Spotter: Al
Posted: 6th, October 2009 | In: Strange But True | Comment (1)
Kate Gosselin Sets Lawyer Marty Singer On Jon And The Missing $200,000
MORE news on OctoSperm man Jon Gosselin and his failed marriage to Kate Gosselin.
Anorak’s pal in Los Angeles tells us of an alleged caper:
It seems Jon emptied out the couple’s joint bank account, to the tune of $200,000, prompting Kate to retain hard-hitting celebrity attorney Marty Singer.
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Posted: 4th, October 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Sergeant Delroy Smellie Charged With G20 Assault
SERGEANT Delroy Smellie is to be charged with assaulting Nicola Fisher at the G20 demonstration in London.
Yeah, Smellie. Oh, nominative determinism.
The G20 summit has long stopped being about politics, and now exists only for the media as a chance for the uniformed police and banner waving poverty fans – hoods up, kids – to go for it in scenes missing from our TV screens since all-seater stadia erupted all over football.
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Posted: 28th, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment (1)
Brad Pitt To Star In Dr Who Spin Off
CELEBRITY quote of the day comes from not-Brad Pitt look-alike John Barrowman, who is in conversion with London Tube weirdo shield Metro:
Hack: My friend says whenever his mother sees you on TV, she says: ‘He’s so handsome – I can’t believe he’s gay!
John Barrowman: “With Brad Pitt you don’t say: ‘I can’t believe he’s married!’ Why does being gay mean women can’t fancy me and find me sexy?”
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Posted: 22nd, September 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
The Moral Panic That Created The Independent Safeguarding Authority
PAEDO! It’s the tabloids’ favourite scare story. So good news then that the Government is introducing a database for every adult who comes into regular contact with children, the mentally ill and the aged, checking for criminal convictions, disciplinary action and responses to anonymous tip-offs but the “Paedo!” at No.23.
The vulnerable are being protected.
Former News of the World editor Rebekah Wade once spoke of her paper’s campaign against paedos: “There are 110,000 sex offenders in Britain – one for every square mile”. But not necessarily evenly spaced out.
“The fact is, that if you have paedophiles in society that aren’t monitored they will strike again,” she said.
A NoTW headline read “Police want you to help trap these paedophiles” and the newspaper published photographs of seven wanted child abusers with backing from the police to “name and shame” them.
Light the torches – we march at dusk:
Ms Eithne Wallis The first national director of the Probation Servicesaid the newspaper risked driving paedophiles out of the sight of probation staff. “I would certainly ask them to think again about the wisdom of what they are actually doing.”
This new drive is about saving the kids from paedos. Panic over! Childhood innocence (Jamie Bulger) can be protected from adult evil (Mother Teresa). Tabloids Rejoice! The new Independent Safeguarding Authority (ISA) will route the paedos!
So here’s the Chicken Little of scare stories the Daily Mail to tell us:
Now Big Brother targets helpful parents as one in four Britons are to be vetted for giant child protection database
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Posted: 11th, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (6)
Teachers Use Nominative Determinism To Label A Child
PRESS Release of the day comes from a parenting club that tells us that 49% of teachers make assumptions about a child by their name. Yeah, only 49%. All that hard work endured by mum and dad as they try to name their bundle is not all that important.
Also, 57% of the teachers say the naughtier children, the Jacks and the Chardonnays, tend to be more popular with their peers than the Lionels, Hyacinths and Nevilles.
More than a third of teachers said the naughtiest pupils were often the brightest and the more sensitive; while two–thirds said they often were not.
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Posted: 8th, September 2009 | In: Online-PR, Reviews | Comments (4)
Jaycee Lee Dugard: Phillip Garrido Helped FBI
JAYCEE Lee Dugard – Anorak’s look at Jaycee Dugard in the news: Experts baffled, Phillip Garrido cures and helps the FBI, and Lorraine Kelly entertains with missing kids…
First up, police who failed to spot the link between a convicted paedophile rapist with children in his garden and missing children, are now linking Phillip Garrido to pretty much every unsolved case in the last three decades:
CBS News: “Cop Seek Link Between Garrido and School Bus Murders”
Police in northern Nevada are scouring old records of major unsolved cases to determine if any match the profile of Phillip Garrido… one of the cold cases under review involves the murders of two children who also vanished near their school bus stop in Reno in 1989 — Jennifer and Charles Chia. That was a year after Garrido was paroled.
Or as the NY Post puts it: “Monster eyed in kid slays”
“Creepy Phil” Garrido and…
“There might not be any link between the cases and him, but we’d be crazy not to look at the possibility,” said Reno police Lt. Mike Whan.
Like “crazy Phil“. And creepy, too.
Anyhow CBS has spoken to more experts and they tell us:
But the road ahead for Jaycee and her daughters will likely be long. Rehabilitation in these types of cases is not easy, say experts.
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Posted: 7th, September 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment
John Mayer’s 1991 Mugshot For Driving Without A License
JOHN Mayer’s mugshot is proof that celebs realises that with Twitter they have no need for an agent nor publicist. Mayer uses the social network to tweet a challenge to TMZ’s Managing Editor Harvey Levin.
Anorak’s Man in the Hollywood Swamp spots Mayer’s tweets that he was once arrested on the same charge as Fallout Boy front man Patrick Stump (see his mugshot for more proof of nominative determinism) – driving without a valid California drivers license.
Mayor challenged Levin to track down his mugshot from the offense. If Levin is successful, Mayor will donate $25,000 to the charity of his choice.
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Posted: 27th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Caster Semenya Scores Three Times Normal Testosterone Levels
MORE news on is she / isn’t she runner Caster Semenya who has testosterone level three times higher than those normally expected in a female sample.
Anorak, meanwhile calls for Berlino the Bear to be tested for human traits. The big brown bear was everywhere at the times, a tireless athlete putting in the yard yards whether it be javelin, 200 meters or what. Is Berlino a man? A woman? A man standing on woman’s shoulders?
Much to debate.
But the press pack ignores the obvious and focuses on a teenage South African. Will she appear in Nuts or Sensible Shoes Monthly?
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Posted: 25th, August 2009 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (4)
Madeleine McCann: Getting The Joke
MADELEINE McCann Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Madeleine McCann in the news – when a missing child can make us laugh…
THIS is Nottingham: “Couple defend Madeleine leaflet”
A NOTTS couple who delivered leaflets in Clifton about the disappearance of Madeleine McCann have defended their actions.
A local issues for Our Maddie…
Grenville Green and his wife, Helene Davies-Green, have been campaigning on behalf of the Madeleine Foundation.
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Posted: 22nd, August 2009 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann, Reviews | Comments (20)
