Anorak

The Consumer | Anorak - Part 20

The Consumer Category

We bring you the chic and unique, the best and most bizarre shopping offers both online and offline. We offer you tips on where to buy, and some of the less mainstream and crazy, individual and offbeat items on the internet. Anything that can be bought and sold can be featured here. And we love showcasing the best and worst art and design.

Man Banned From Every Supermarket In Britain

 

EUGENIO Freitas, 49, has been banned from every supermarket in Britain unless supervised by an adult. Even Asda. The Sun says he earned this award by “performing a solo sex act” in the meat aisle of Sainsbury’s, Newcastle-under-Lyme, Staffordshire.

Mr Freitas was taken to court. He was found guilty of outraging public decency. He was handed a six month suspended prison sentence.

Prosecutor Marcus Harry told the court: “At first a member of staff gave him the benefit of the doubt and assumed he was adjusting himself. But she was then called to the CCTV area after a shopper complained to a security officer. The staff member and security officer viewed CCTV of the defendant. He was seen for about 10 minutes with his hands down his trousers and in his pocket with his hands moving around.”

What an odd thing to be aroused by a Sainsbury’s, an anaemic, soulless, white-lit world of packaged goods. Unless it’s an elaborate plot to get of doing the shopping? If it is, we have news for Mr Freitas: his wife wants to go to the dress shops. As you were…

Posted: 12th, December 2013 | In: Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Wonderful Romania: The Salina Turda Salt Mines

salina turda

 

THE Salina Turda might sound like a poo in a the sea but is in fact a centuries-old salt mine in Romania. You can visit it. Even the Beitish are welcome. The Romanians are worried about mobs of British immigrants “flooding” their beautiful country but the thing is underground, so out of sight, out of mind, and all that.

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Posted: 12th, December 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


‘Snuggle House’ Gets Closed Because Everyone Thought It Was Filled With Prostitutes

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HAVE you heard of the unique business is Wisconsin called Snuggle House? Chances are, you haven’t. The idea behind the place was to offer snuggles to anyone who wanted one. For £37 an hour. You could have a little intimacy and get your hair stroked and then be on your way.

That’s slightly odd, but kinda nice, right?

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Posted: 12th, December 2013 | In: Money, News, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Bitter Coffee: French Cafe Charges Less For Being Polite

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NICE’S Petite Syrah café is offering customers the chance to get a discount on their coffee.  Asking for a “a coffee” will set you back €7. But “a coffee please” is €4.25.  “Hello, a coffee please” is a bargain €1.40.

Of course, this being France, anyone speaking in an English accent will be ignored. But why does the Petite Syrah stop there? Why not extend the offers to all manner of manners?

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Posted: 12th, December 2013 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


At Last! Lie Detectors In Santa’s Grotto

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FOR years, lying little swine have got away with lying to Santa, saying they’ve been good all year when in fact, their school reports say something very different.

At long last, children in shopping centres in the UK are being asked to take a lie detector test before being granted an audience with His Holiness, Father Christmas.

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Posted: 11th, December 2013 | In: News, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The iPotty Is Declared Worst Toy Of The Year

ipotty anorak

IT is the season for the awards ceremonies and one organisation has declared that this, the iPotty, is the worst toy of the year. I have to admit that I can’t quite see it myself: either as the worst toy of this or any other year or as an actual product to be honest. What it actually is is simply a potty to be used, obviously, for potty training and containing a stand into which one can slip one of Apple’s iPads. And you might think that that’s about it and not something so heinous as to deserve this award:

BOSTON—December 9—It’s official. Fed up with the latest effort to insinuate screens into every nook and cranny of young children’s lives, members of Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood selected the 2-In-1 iPotty with Activity Seat for iPad by CTA Digital as winner of this year’s TOADY (Toys Oppressive And Destructive to Young children) Award for the Worst Toy of the Year.

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Posted: 11th, December 2013 | In: Money, Technology, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Epic Calendars: Staffordshire’s Classic Beauties

EPIC calendars presents “classic curves 2014 Our own unique celebration of classic beauty”. Self Drive Classics Ltd has the details:

Over the last few years we have been lucky enough to work with local model and classic car enthusiast Joy. After several photo sessions and lots of ideas to spice up our website and advertising material we have ended up with quite a collection of great classic car based images. So this year we though ‘why not produce a calendar – just for fun?’

 

The chamois dress:

 

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Confort seats.

 

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Bond is green with envy.

 

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Buy it here.

Posted: 11th, December 2013 | In: Cars, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Woman Glued To Seat Freed By WD40

woman glued to chair

WE join the action at the Banks County Home Depot in north Georgia. Illyanna De La Keur has sat on a chair. she can’t get up. the chair has been smeared in glue. Strong glue.

“I’m a grown woman who can’t even sit up,” says Ms De La Keur said “I was stuck probably over an hour. I’m still so sore that I can’t leave my couch.”

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Posted: 11th, December 2013 | In: Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Man Sick Of Shopping With Girlfriend Kills Himself at Mall

TAO Hsiao, 38, was with his girlfriend at a shopping mall in Xuzhou, Jiangsu, China. Five hours into the shop he wanted to leave. An eyewitness says: “He told her she already had enough shoes, more shoes that she could wear in a lifetime and it was pointless buying any more. She started shouting at him accusing him of being a skinflint and of spoiling Christmas, it was a really heated argument.”

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Posted: 10th, December 2013 | In: Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Fat Flag: People Painted As Flags Eat That Nation’s Stereotypical Food

JONATHAN Icher’s Fat Flags is people painted as national flags eating the food most associated with that nation. So. The Italian eats pasta. The Frenchman eats the croissant. The British eat… Well, you could be intrigued. Scroll down the page and see. And know that Icher is French. Clue: it’s not humous, a kebab, chips, a supermarket ready-meal, a meaty spring roll or tandoori chicken.

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Posted: 9th, December 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


3 Highly Disturbing Vintage Ads From The 70s And 80s

EVER been scared by an advert?

 

Have Her In Stitches (literally)

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THIS advertisement comes from a 1982 Canadian newspaper. Notice anything particularly troubling about it?

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Posted: 9th, December 2013 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Candy Crush Saga: The Game That’s Too Successful To Float (See Zynga)

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THIS is a fun little story. Candy Crush Saga is the all conquering barnstorming game of the moment and it’s made its maker, King, worth something like $5 billion. But it’s exactly that mega-success of the game that means that the maker cannot cash out by floating it on the stock market. Imagine that, being to successful to be able to sell yourself.

King, the mobile games maker behind Candy Crush Saga, has delayed its initial public offering until next year amid fears that the flagship game has been “too successful”.

The British company, which is gearing up for a potential $5bn (£3bn) flotation on the Nasdaq stock exchange, had considered listing by the end of this year. However, it has decided to wait to give it time to demonstrate that it has other hits in the pipeline and is not a “one hit wonder”.

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Posted: 9th, December 2013 | In: Money, News, Technology, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Inappropriate Christmas Jumpers: Jingle Balls

TODAY in Inappropriate Christmas Jumpers: Jingle Balls:

xmas jumpers

Posted: 9th, December 2013 | In: Fashion, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


How To Play Rock ‘n’ Roll On A Keyboard

HOW do you play rock n’n roll? Well, like this. And LOUD. Play it LOUD:

Posted: 8th, December 2013 | In: Music, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Funny Canadian Graffiti Of The Day: The Poison Flute

canadian graffiti

Posted: 8th, December 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Desperate Marketing: SpaghettiOs Hijack Pearl Harbour Anniversary

TODAY is the 72nd anniversary of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. In the photo below, survivor Mal Middlesworth, centre, sits with other Pearl Harbor survivors before the start of ceremony commemorating the attack. You can see pictures of the murder and mayhem here.

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Posted: 7th, December 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


A.A. Milne Reads Winnie The Pooh In 1929 (With Photos Of The Writer Playing With ‘Christopher Robin’)

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IN 1929 A.A. Milne (above) was recorded reading aloud a passage from his book, Winnie-the-Pooh.

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Posted: 7th, December 2013 | In: Books, Flashback | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


The Santa Claus Spandex All-In-One Sack Sock

santa spandex

SANTA has been on a diet. He can now slip into his Santa Claus Spandex. bodysuit. And so can you budding Santas. Pop along to Rubie’s Costume Company and buy you stretchy Santa all-in-one sock. Spot the sack…

Spotter: Laughing Squid

Posted: 6th, December 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Nottingham Man Buys Photo Of XBox One For £450

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WHEN Peter Clatworthy saw a photo of anXBox One console on eBay, he wanted it. He handed over £450 plug £8 packaging.  The 19-year-old student, of Bilborough, Nottingham, wanted the device for his four-year-old son, McKenzie. But he got exactly what he clicked on: a picture of an XBox One.

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Posted: 6th, December 2013 | In: Strange But True, Technology, The Consumer | Comments (4) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Letters Of Note: My Waitrose Rum Baba Pudding

LETTES of Note: The woman who still can’t make a decent rum baba:

crackers

 

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Posted: 6th, December 2013 | In: News, The Consumer | Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0


Mandela Marketing: The Most Inappropriate Tributes (My Little Pony)

ASK not what Nelson Mandela did for humanity but what Nelson Mandela can do to promote your brand:

My Little Pony Fan Fiction salutes one of its own:

Posted: 6th, December 2013 | In: Politicians, The Consumer | Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed:RSS 2.0