Anorak TV Category
Television and radio programme reviews, trailers, highlights, twilights and cinema news. Also the neglected gems from years past.
SHOULD the word milk be used for fluids that do not come from a cow, like soy milk. Should it be called something else instead – like, says, soy jism? Cue a heated debate on Fox 5 News…
IN How We Live Today, Anorak brings you this video of a pet cat attacking the babysitter, who has broken a glass. As you can see, the place is filmed from all angles. It’s CCTV at home with mum and dad.
Keep a close eye on that babysitter, worried parents. But – awe, shucks – isn’t the lunatic cat cute.
Then the video is uploaded for us to watch on the web. This is how you protect your kids. It’s good wholesome fun:
TO the Queensland Raceway where a mini is auditioning for the Olympics. It flips. It leaps. And it flies over the barrier into the crowd. Two people wounded,- but not seriously…
HERE’S a video of the groom being sick at the altar. Is this the worst thing that could happen?
WHEN Iceland closed the air above the UK and Western Europe, birds sang and the skies were full of larks and emptiness. Then the skies reopened. The planes returned. Flightradar24.com and Ito World logged the changes in air space and created what looks like a sperm for each flight. Not much action over France and Spain but you get the idea…
WERNER Herzog Reads Where’s Waldo for your benefit and for the benfit of mankind…
ADVERT of The Day: How to put out a Japanese fire with your face. If you see a fire. If you want to help. Puncture your face with a large stick and do the right thing.*
* May incur light-headedness and death.
HOW’S the water? How does it feel? A reporter finds out…
THE Flip Flop man of Coachella is having trouble with his shoes. While you enjoy his mania, look at how clean and tidy the festival goers are. It’s not a music festival, it’s a GAP TV commercial. With Peaches Geldof on pants…
THE cameraman has run out of water and the man neds to know what the baboon knows: where’s the pond?
Spotter: Cynical C
IT’S Christiaan Van Vuuren, the Fully Sick Rapper. Vuuren, of Sydney, scored a drug-resistant strain of tuberculosis while holidaying Argentina. Back in Oz, he was placed in isolation. He’s been there since Jan. 18.
HAVING introduced you to Robot Mouth, we now bring you Robot Mouth sings Tralala in the style of Russian beat box legend Eduard Hill, aka Eduard Anatolyevich.
Take ‘em away, Robot Mouth.
(Robot Mouth also doubles as novelty singing sex toy for all your family parties.
Billy the Big Mouth Bass remains agog.)
PRESENTING the greatest fail ever – The Taekwondo Punch. Ahem…
Russell Brand, you can’t beat this for priapic wit. Vagina Nose is the future of TV presenting.
This is also how they keep Mick Jagger in tune.
And it’s also a Muslim safety glove.
WANT to see a video of a Russian bear wearing a négligée , dancing to Soviet rock? You do? Well, with Anorak TV, you’re in luck. This is what happens when Daddy Bear and Goldilocks had an affair:
THIS Week’s Driving Tip of the day is brought to you by the Russian driver who tried to navigate his vehicle between one car towing another car. In Russia, this is how you drive. You pick the shortest route and go for it. If anyone is in the way, hoot the horn. If a building is in the way, hoot harder…
MEET Scoop The Pelican. Scoop is on a Missouri television station, showing everyone how he got his name by cracking news stories and biting Walt on the penis. Twice. “Why is Scoop so angry?” Answer: because he can’t get at the braying, shrill-voiced harridan of a newscaster. Run VT. Run, Walt. Run!
DOES the Internet really exist or is it all just a conspiracy? “Join us in this quest for justice and truth where facts and fiction will meet each other on an epic battle in the name of journalism.”
Lin Yu Chun is the one.
CLAUDIO Montuori introduces the musical interlude of the day. In Lisbon, Portugal, Claudio Montuori is waiting to be discovered. Spike Jones – eat yer heart out. Ladies and germs, Mr Claudio Montuori…
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LISTEN up, cowboy. In today’s National Service Training Video we tell you how to toss a grenade. You toss a grenade..? Yes, you, madam, in the England whites and hooked hands. Yes, that’s right, you toss a grenade “far”.
In this video a Chinese soldiers tosses his grenade into the bunker wall. Problem is that he’s stood in the bunker.
EVERYONE wants to be a Single Lady with Beyonce. “You can be a Single Lady if you want.” So says Mum. Mummy knows best. Mums have been creating single ladies for eons. Daddy wants more from his son. Shiloh Pitt understands.
MOVE over Tiger Woods, make way for Miodrag Gidra Stojanovic. He holds the world record for ‘Serbian Push Ups”. Miodrag Gidra Stojanovic can thrust 50 in 10 seconds and 29,449 in 24 hours:
WHO needs Wayne Rooney to stamp on your goolies when you can make you own entertainment? Not that game lad: