Anorak

TV & Radio | Anorak - Part 40

TV & Radio Category

Television and radio programme reviews, trailers, highlights, twilights and cinema news. Also the neglected gems from years past.

Brendan Adhere is the man who slipped on the ice

BRENDAN Adhere is The Man Who Slipped On The Ice. He slipped on ice in Dublin. It was filmed and broadcast on the telly.

Brendan became a TV star.

How they laughed.

But what was it like for Brendan to be a national joke? Well…

Posted: 25th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Bad TV: woman scared of snowmen meets huge snowman on This Morning

BAD TV presents the woman who can’t stand people dressed as snowmen being introduced to a snowman peeping through Jimmy Savile’s old Y-fronts on ITV’s This Morning. Sheehs! Get a load of the pair to her right. They can melt snowmen with their hair…

Posted: 23rd, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


The X Factor Voiceover Man Strikes Back

IT’S The X Factor uncut. Peter Dickson is the X Factor voiceover man striking back. (Yep, we found another version.)

Posted: 22nd, December 2011 | In: Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comments (8)


Peoples falling over on icy stairs (video)

PEOPLE slipping on icy stairs is a video of people slipping on icy stairs that proves CCTV is useful for getting laughs.

Comedy is someone else falling over – tragedy is you falling over:

Spotter: Break

Posted: 21st, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


America hates Steve Jones on X Factor

AMERICA is a notoriously difficult nut to crack and, if Robbie Williams couldn’t do it, then Steve Jones certainly can’t in his tenure as The X Factor USA role.

When the show returns for a second season, it seems the former T4 presenter will have to watch it on ITV2, nursing his P45 from Simon Cowell. Unsurprising really, given that he’s roughly as charming as a machine that makes cardboard boxes.

USA Today referred to him “as charmless as a Ken doll and even less animated.”

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Posted: 20th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Dutch TV presenters Dennis Storm and Valerio Zeno eat each other (video)

DUTCH TV, which has given us Big Brother and, Celebrity Big Brother, now brings the world Test Rabbits or Guinea Pigs (Proefkonijnen), the show in which TV presenters Dennis Storm and Valerio Zeno eat each other. Two men eating other’s meat. Dutch private booth TV just went mainstream.

Zeno eats a slice of Storm’s bottom. Storm eats a piece of Zeno’s stomach. It’s Celebrity Fit Club – The Short Cuts.

Says Dennis Storm:

“It is weird to look into the eyes of a friend when you are chewing on his belly.”

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Posted: 20th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Stewie the cat puts Connar into a trance

STEWIE the cat is filmed settling Connar to sleep. Well, so says Aarongrant1 on YouTube. Anorak knows cats. They are self-serving creatures. Stewie is exercising mind control. One day Connar will disobey mum and dad. Mark out words…

Posted: 20th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Kids getting intentionally crap Christmas presents from Jimmy Kimmel

JIMMYKimmel called on his viewers to give their children an intentionally crap and early Christmas present and then film it. It’s brilliant:

Posted: 18th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Calvin and Hobbes twisted snowman torture is wonderful

FANS of the Calvin and Hobbes comic strip will love this video Christmas card of the snowman torture scenes. Incidentally, if you do end up alone and sleep with a snowman this Christmas, try not to complain about the wt patch in teh morning. It’s Christmas!

Spotter: i09

 

Posted: 18th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


How many workers does it take to stop an out of control concrete buffer?

HOW many workers does it take to stop an out of control concrete buffer?

Spotter: DailyWhaT

Posted: 18th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Harry Judd wins Strictly Come Dancing as McFly make it a pro-celebrity two-step

HARRY Judd has won televised pro-celebrity dance show Strictly Come Dancing. Harry Judd now makes it two in a row for his band McFly, following in the steps of Dougie Poynter, King of the I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here jungle.

For a long time all eyes were on Ola Jordan’s midriff. Indeed, if McFly are to tour again we invite them to include Ola as kind of Bez at the front of stage. It could only go well.

Congratulations, then, to Harry Judd. Before the baffled eyes of Bruce Forsyth, Judd accepted his massive Glitterball trophy, and blessedly did not use the word “journey” in his valedictory speech, thus breaking from his Strictly contract and revealing the revellious streak we look for in our musical stars.

Said Harry Judd:

“All I can say is, from the bottom of heart thank you to everyone for voting for Aliona and me. I’ve been on the best show on TV and I’m just honoured.”

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Posted: 18th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (3)


Man demolishes tower like game of Jenga

IN this video a man attempt to demolish a Tower as if playing Jenga whil doing an impression of Fred Dibnah meeting Buster Keaton:

Posted: 17th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


A penguin fetches a newspaper

WHAT’S black and white and read all over? A penguin fetching a newspapers. Dogs… Your days of slavery are numbered:

Posted: 16th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Hunter Denies Eating A Donut: Sugary Lips Cost Treats

HAS Hunter been eating a donut? Mum says yes. Hunter’s lips say nooooooo.

Mum records the evidence to use in future criminal profiling cases:

Posted: 15th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (2)


Flashback TV: Poshest Blockbusters Gold Run Ever

WATCH in awe as a man named Paul blitzes the Blockbusters Gold Run in the deftest and poshest way possible. His friend, also called Paul (Bob affectionately named them Paul 1 and Paul 2) also gives him a very posh round of applause at the end. TV needs more bowtie wearers…

Huzzah!

Posted: 14th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Tallafornia Is Eugenics Telly Hitler Could Only Have Dreamt Of

TALLAFORNIA is a vison on hell in Dublin. The Irish Herald gives it a cracking review:

Tallafornia is cheap, tacky, shoddy and extraordinarily badly-produced. It’s so grotty it makes the Living channel look like PBS.

Can it be so bad, it’s good? Or will it just be humanity debased, the kind of TV Hitler and his Nazi eugenic machine would have dreamt up and broadcast to debase a the untermensch?

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Posted: 14th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Japanese Teacher Teaches Foreigners How To Speak English…Sorry…Engrish…

EDUCATION Video of The Day: Japanese teacher teaches foreigners how to speak English… sorry…Engrish…

Spotter: Matt Miller

Posted: 14th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Girls Vomits On Stage During School Play

SCHOOL production of the day – in which the fairy vomits on stage. Hey, you need to try something new every year or else the mums and dads get bored. Next year’s nativity play features Jesus’ phone being hacked by Herod and the ‘Virgin’Mary’s husband Joseph explaining what he was up with the innkeeper’s wife…

Posted: 14th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Emma West Fan Club: Racist Bus Traveller Of The Day Video (Alleged?)

THE Emma West Public Transport Society of My Fu**ing Great Britain (alleged) presents British bus traveller of the day.

Langauge is NSFW – but well safe for their Great Britain:

Posted: 13th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


German Carries Lots Of Beer On His Hans

HERE’S a German called Hans carrying lots of big glasses of beer at once to the top tabel at the G8 summit in Frankfurt. He never arrived. Instead the world leaders had to make to with a bottle of Ouzo and a sniff of Sarkozy’s aftershave.

Note: sound effects, as recorded at the Griechenland und Fehlschlag club, were added later.

Posted: 13th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment (1)


The Friendliest Bear In The World: A Video Of Awwww Shucks

IT’S the friendliest bear in the world. He’s soooo lifelike. Big brown bears get so little good press. It’s all so much fretting over suicidal polar bears and non-shagging pandas that gets the news media excited. But brown bears can be cute, too. They can wave. Of course, seconds after this video was taken another huge brown bear – the one Snuggles was waving to like a special toddler wearing gloves tied together with elastic – approached the Family Robinson from behind and tried to eat them and their pic-er-nic baskets…

Spotter: TDW

 

Posted: 12th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment (1)


X Factor Winners Little Mix Need Tulisa To Make The Spice Girls Cry

LITTLE Mix have won the X Factor. To them the chance to record great pop music. Or as the Sun screams from its front page:

“£8m Mega Mix – Girls beat Marcus to set up huge payday”

Colin Robertson is all about the money:

And they are set to rake in millions…

…the girls were last night set to earn a staggering £8MILLION from megabucks commercial deals. Their record deal advance of around £150,000 will be dwarfed by lucrative contracts with major brand names. The cute foursome are viewed as “a marketer’s dream” and have a string of offers on the table already.

They include haircare products, clothing manufacturers, beauty firms and corporate gigs earning £50,000 a time.

They will also make a fortune in the US as Cowell pushes ahead with his dream of getting them into the big time.

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Posted: 12th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Guy Francis – Mr Tourettes – Sings To All The Girls I’ve Loved Before

TO All The Girls I’ve Loved Before, as sung by Mr Tourettes himself, Guy Francis.

Language is NSFW.

Posted: 12th, December 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Little Mix Win X Factor As Rachel Crow Asks Her Mom Why She Never Fell Ill And Nearly Died?

ON the night Little Mix are voted winners of the X Factor 2011 and band most likely to sing a dreary single – didn’t you prefer their old stuff when they were Rhythmix? – a thought for Rachel Crow. She’s the 13-year-old who when told that America had voted her off the US X Factor sank to her knees in a manner a penitent King Herod would consider a little OTT and did a passable impression of Violet Elizabeth Bott.

Everyone cried. Well, everyone aside from the show’s host Steve Jones, the animatronic Man At Burton’s suit dummy who went down on one knee like Bruce Forsyth lining up a pro-celebrity putt with Tarby and missed.

The wonderful tear ducts were opened when Nicole Scherzinger failed at her job of judging and took it to a phone vote. Nicole just wanted the world to know that sending home a teenager was so hard. Nicole is no high school teacher. She dabbed her eyes with Rachel’s cuddle cloth and held her hands over her heart to check it was still there. Then the American pubic voted. Rachel was gone to the celebrity butter mountain.

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Posted: 11th, December 2011 | In: Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comments (4)


Louis Walsh Had No Idea He Was Going Bald Until Simon Cowell Told Him

IT’S the morning of the X Factor live final and the Daily Mirror begins the expected news of hype and hoopla. Yes – Louis Walsh has had a hair transplant. Now as you roll your eyes at the singing and judgements you can study the top of Walsh’s head. And that used to be no easy thing. Walsh’s head acts as if it’s on a spring, bobbling here and there like an incontinent Weeble top-toeing thruogh a Glastonbury portaloo. We thought it was raw excitement or itching powder that kept up Walsh’s perpetual motion, but it was most likely the Irishman aiming to be a moving target and so harder to hit with barbs.

It turns out that even Walsh could not see Walsh’s head, having to be told he was thinning by the ever helpful Simon Cowell. Walsh had been labouring under the impression his hair was a blur or iron grey filings.

He tells the Mirror:

“He [Cowell]came up to me and said, ‘You know, you’re starting to lose your hair, dear.” I said, ‘I am not, dear! And anyway, you’re going grey!’”

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Posted: 10th, December 2011 | In: Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comment