Anorak News | Controversial Figures

Controversial Figures

by | 23rd, May 2003

‘TO people who bought the Independent this morning, you should ask for your 55p back.

Tim – not so nice and dim

The paper has metamorphosed into The Actuary Weekly with a load of incomprehensible figures on its front page.

If a picture tells a thousand words, a load of jumbled-up figures (supposedly presenting ”Asylum – The Facts”) tell none.

Among these figures are the following: 40,000; 790; 1.98%; £200; 8th; 85,865; 32%; Iraq.

Okay, so the last one wasn’t a number, but by that stage we were getting a little queasy with all the digits arrayed in front of us.

And so to Iraq, where Colonel Tim Collins is probably wishing he didn’t give his troops the Shakespearian send-off for which he has been so praised.

The most famous British soldier since Captain Snort was in charge of Pippin Fort is now facing a second MoD investigation into the way he ran his regiment.

According to the Guardian, the inquiry will ”delve into how he commanded the regiment and probe allegations of a culture of bullying”.

Col Collins is already under investigation by the military police following allegations that he mistreated Iraqis in the recent war.

And the Times this morning interviews the headmaster whom Collins is supposed to have pistol-whipped.

The colonel, an Egyptian interpreter and about 10 British soldiers arrived at Ayoub Yousif Naser’s house one night early in the war.

”Suddenly, this officer took out his pistol and hit me on the back of the head,” he said.

”I was hit twice and I fell down. There was a lot of blood on my head. After he had hit me, I told him that I had guns.”

Mr Naser, who was a feared member of the Ba’ath Party, claims that Collins then dragged him outside, kicked him in the shins and later held a mock execution of him and his son.

He said that he was then treated for his wounds before Col Collins apologised for what he did.

”Of course it’s wrong for officers to do what he did,” he said. ”He should be punished.”

If true, says the Times, such conduct would breach the Army’s rules of engagement and the Geneva Conventions.

Shooting people, on the other hand, is perfectly all right.

Posted: 23rd, May 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink