Anorak News | Sad Song

Sad Song

by | 29th, August 2003

‘THERE’S trouble brewing down under.

Australia – World Champion Sheep Shearing Champions for a record thirtieth straight year

First the Australians had to come to terms with their defeat by the English rugger team, which was a major blow. As we have discussed before, the Australians are careful to concentrate on sports like cricket and rugger, which only a handful of countries play.

As an additional bonus, these are sports which are restricted in England to fringe elements such as in-bred upper-class oddballs and a few other misfits. This means that the Aussies can beat England and wave their inflatable ’roos excitedly, deluding themselves that they are a great sporting race.

Anyway, not only are they facing the prospect of failing to lift the rugger World Cup on home soil this year, but to make things worse, they can’t even use their traditional tune, “Waltzing Matilda”, before their matches.

Instead, they will have to endure the unpopular “Advance Australia Fair” – an anthem described by the Independent as a “stilted, austere song” whose words are unfamiliar to most of the population. (Serves them right for ditching “God Save The Queen”.)

Of course, things may not be quite as bad as they fear. Australia will probably not progress very far in the tournament, so the crowds won’t have to hear the song very often.

And England will probably win it, allowing plenty of opportunity to hear an infinitely superior anthem: “Jerusalem”, “God Save the Queen”, “Eskimo Nell” or “Candle in the Wind” – whichever is chosen by the rugger committee chaps in their infinite wisdom.’

Posted: 29th, August 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink