Anorak News | Pommy De Terror

Pommy De Terror

by | 1st, October 2003

‘LIKE the British Empire, al Qaeda have plans to turn the bits of the world where their operatives ply their trade a deep blood red.

‘Ah, fair suck of the sauce bottle, mate’

But rather than a mission to civilise and dress the locals in ties, the oddly invisible Osama bin Laden’s band of misfits and weirdos have only one desire: to kill.

And judging by today’s papers they are coming to a town near you, if they are not already there.

The Star says that yesterday ten Algerian men were arrested in London and Manchester under suspicion that they were planning a strike on UK targets.

At around the same time, the Mail saw Tunisian-born Nizar ben Abdelaziz “Smudger” Trabelsi, a former footballer for German Bundesliga team Fortuna Duesseldorf, get banged up by a Belgian court for his part in a plot to attack a NATO base.

Nizy is thought to be under the moon, sick as an infidel dog at the thought of spending the next ten seasons in chokey. If only he’d kept things simple. If only he’d moved to Australia.

Once there he could have settled down, and like the other 100 active members of the terror group blown the froth off a cold one, thrown a sheep’s gonad on the barbie and done his bit for the hole in the Ozone.

And more likely he’d had fond himself quite happy. That’s the opinion of Rohan Gunaratna, head of terrorism research at Singapore’s Institute for Defense and Strategic Studies, in the Express.

Gunaratna says that terrorists despatched to foment disaster in Australia grew to like the place.

“Many on the Oz groups had jobs, homes, children at school, and had settled into the Aussie way of life. Living in Australia had influenced their thinking.”

As one of the number puts it: “Two pints of lager, three red wines and a G & T…that’ll be £10:25, you godless Pommy bastard!”’

Posted: 1st, October 2003 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink