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Facts And Fiction

by | 20th, October 2003

‘KNOWLEDGE can often serve to place a thing in context.

‘The capital of Italy is Rome’

For example, if we first hear that Vanessa Feltz has struggled with her weight, we are less surprised to then learn that she chooses to live in north London bricks and mortar and not a house on stilts in Bangladesh.

Without the background facts we are less able to appreciate the here and now. But some facts are apropos of nothing. They are facts that stand alone.

And so we arrive at the wedding of Jenny Powell and Marcus Baxendell. First fact, and this might be important, is that the wedding was in Italy but neither Jenny nor Marcus are in any way Italian.

They selected Italy for their wedding because Jenny knew it was the place where she wanted to get married after visiting the place with Marcus a few moons ago.

Jenny’s anorexic Italian credentials might explain why the bride and, most horribly, the groom wore white while their daughter, Connie, played in the train of her wedding dress and trod on dad’s cream loafers (most, most horrible).

No Italian would get away with such a get-up. Indeed, the Pope’s Trades Descriptions Act of 1876 expressively forbids mothers passing themselves off as virgins.

(The groom’s numerous crimes against fashion are not punishable by an eternity in Hell, although he and Jenny have settled for a life in Cheshire, which is as near as damn it).

But the fact we gear up to is as follows. “The evening’s festivities and celebrations took place at Villa Fiordasilo, once home to Italy’s most famous poet, Gabriel D’Annunzio.”

Usually OK! sticks to who designed the outfits, but here it chooses to protect the guilty and mention instead a man who died in 1938 and has been described as an agitator, fascist and nationalist.

As such he might not have enjoyed two non-pats getting married in his country, breathing in his air and partying in his grounds.

Although, as a poet (see above) he would have put it in more lyrical terms.’



Posted: 20th, October 2003 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink