Anorak News | Duncan Doughnut

Duncan Doughnut

by | 29th, October 2003

‘YOU can call the Tory party useless, dysfunctional, unelectable and even plain old rubbish but you can never call them unfair.

‘That’s another nail in my coughin’!’

After Iain Duncan Smith has faced a vote of confidence in his ability to lead later today (and the Independent says that his allies fear “humiliation” in this title decider), someone else will get a go at being Tory Leader.

The flaming torch that has been passed with buttery fingers from John Major to William Hague and then onto Iain Duncan Smith is now being offered to…well, the Times wants us to guess.

Will it be Michael Howard, the 11-10 favourite, described by the paper as the “front-runner if IDS loses” – and is that ever one small if?

Or there’s Oliver Letwin, the little chap who seems to be modelled on some Wind In The Willows character, but one backed by modernisers, and punters at odds of 10-1.

There’s Michael Ancram, an outsider at 16-1. And joining him on sweet sixteens is Theresa May, she of the leopard-skin-print shoes and the Tories’ current party chairman.

And then there’s some odd chap with a funny cough. The Independent bends down to hear him say that he’s got the support of grass roots conservatives.

But no-one knows who this fantasist is and the sooner he’s taken out of sight, the sooner the serious political stuff can finally begin.’

Posted: 29th, October 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink