Anorak News | Remember, Remember

Remember, Remember

by | 5th, November 2003

‘NO sooner has the little blighter next door chucked eggs and flour over your front door on Hallowe’en, then he’s sticking a lit firework through your letterbox.

Jeffrey Archer wishes he hadn’t agreed to by the guy at his local bonfire party

Tonight is Bonfire Night. You’d do well to remember that, and a few other things besides.

A) Remember all to be in the garden whatever the temperature to watch the fantastic display.

B) Remember to eat roast potatoes so hot that they inflict third degree burns to your hands and cause the roof of your mouth actually to catch light.

C) Remember to stand well back – thus doing as the person with their head over the firework they’ve just lit has commanded.

D) Remember to throw your mug of revolting hot punch over the designated firework lighter as their beard burns in the moonlight.

E) Remember to wonder why you didn’t just go to an organised firework display at the recreation ground.

F) Remember to forget Bonfire Night next year.

G) Throw a small man on the fire.’

Posted: 5th, November 2003 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink