Anorak News | Bride Of Frankenstein

Bride Of Frankenstein

by | 19th, November 2003

‘THIS week saw possibly the greatest soap wedding in history as Roy Cropper made Tracy Luv a not-so-honest woman.

The happy couple

Ceiran, who they’d dragged off the street to be a witness, could hardly contain himself. “It’s the first wedding I’ve ever been to when the groom’s wife is one of the guests,” he tittered to Hayley.

Even the registrar was a bit taken aback. “You two are here to marry?” she spluttered as Tracy rolled her eyes and applied more lipstick throughout the ceremony and Roy clutched his shopping bag closer to his chest.

“Right, you got what you want,” spat Tracy after the service. “Now leave me alone.” Tracy thinks her secret is safe about the baby actually being Steve’s now that Peter’s left town.

Peter decided to leave Weatherfield after being publicly humiliated by both wives in a showdown in the Rovers. Lucy had pretended that they had a future together providing Peter told Shelly in front of the whole pub that they were over and that he loved Lucy.

Shelly, not surprisingly, didn’t take this news too well and smacked him in the face. The pain wasn’t over for Peter, however, as Lucy then proceeded to delight in telling him that she was just stringing him along all the time.

“I hate you,” she spat, her pretty face twisted into a mask of hate, “and you’ll never see your son again.” And with that she was off to Australia. To do what we wonder – surely they have enough mediocre actresses of their own over there already.

Peter, realising that he’d burnt all his bridges and ran out of single women to marry, left for Portsmouth. Secrets are hard to keep in soaps though and you know it’s only a matter of time before the real father of Tracy’s baby is discovered. Especially if it’s born wearing a black leather jacket and a put-upon expression.

Steve’s troubles are set to get worse this week when yer man Jim McDonald contacts him from prison and asks him to spy on mum Liz, who he suspects of having an affair. Yes, folks, Liz and Jim – the Liza Minnelli and David Gest of Weatherfield are back!

And from the first “So it is” uttered from the moustachioed lips of the Big Man, it was like they’d never been away.

In a spin-off special, Steve goes to Blackpool to meet up with his mother, who must be single-handedly keeping the lycra clothing and home-perming industries afloat.

And just to up the freak factor so that it’s off the scale – Bet Lynch returns. Well she’s probably at a loose end now that Halloween’s over.

Back in Weatherfield, the age gap between Martin and Katy is beginning to show. Martin was less than pleased to come home from a shift to find the flat full of drunk teenagers writhing about on his bed.

“Ooouuut!” he shouted while pulling apart sticky teenagers. “Yer just like me dad,” pouted Katy. Perhaps not the best comparison, given the circumstances.’

Posted: 19th, November 2003 | In: Strange But True Comment | TrackBack | Permalink