Anorak News | Bin Jokin’

Bin Jokin’

by | 3rd, December 2003

‘A SIGN has recently gone up in the dingy basement that passes for an office in Anorak Towers reminding staff not to say anything derogatory about Genghis Khan for fear of offending any Mongol visitors.

Say what you like about Genghis Khan, but he was always good to his mum

Similar injunctions apply to Adolf Hitler (for fear of offending Germans and men with moustaches), Eric The Red (Scandinavians; men with moustaches), Pol Pot (Cambodians; men without moustaches) and Chris De Burgh (Irish; men with bad fringes).

Anyone overheard disobeying any of these orders (with, say, a joke about Hitler being a monorchid) is severely punished, normally by having at least two more years added to their sentence – sorry, contract.

So, we are heartened to discover this morning that the Prison Service operates a similar no-nonsense policy with its staff.

Colin Rose, for instance, was sacked after 21 years of unblemished service allegedly for making an ”insensitive” comment about Osama Bin Laden in the aftermath of 9/11.

A former Coldstream Guardsman, Mr Rose (who is claiming unfair dismissal) told a tribunal that the incident happened two months after the terrorist attacks on New York when he threw some keys into a metal chute at the prison gatehouse.

When someone said it sounded as if he had thrown them so hard that they were going through the tray at the bottom of the chute, Mr Rose said: ”There’s a photo of Osama Bin Laden in there.”

The Telegraph says another prison officer told him to be quiet because two Asian women wearing headscarves and an Asian man were at the window of the gatehouse.

Mr Rose was given a ticking off at the time by Andrew Rogers, assistant governor of Blundeston Prison in Suffolk, but sacked after a six-month investigation on the grounds that the three visitors may have overheard his remark.

”I took offence at the comment,” Mr Rogers told the hearing in Norwich. ”If the visitors had heard the comment, they might have taken offence too.”

Indeed, on the basis that all Asians are Muslim and all Muslims are al-Qaeda sympathisers, if not terrorists themselves, we imagine they would be grossly offended.

However, while we obviously applaud the Prison Service’s determination to protect terrorists, mass murderers and genocidal maniacs from contumely, we seek guidance on the extent of this policy.

How many people exactly do you have to slaughter before you can be referred to in anything less than a complimentary manner?’

Posted: 3rd, December 2003 | In: Broadsheets Comment | TrackBack | Permalink